A Whole Lot of Haters!

sandyfeet10
sandyfeet10 Posts: 280 Member
edited September 28 in Health and Weight Loss
Hello MFP friends! I was reading a post that was supposed to be a success story and everyone rained on the girl's parade because they thought she was unhealthy. She wasn't asking for advice!

Let's revert back to childhood here...."If you don' t have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all."

Let's make a promise to be kind and considerate. In addition, if someone is asking for an opinion, express it in a way as not to hurt that person!

Stop being rude and stay positive!

I promise to keep my comments positive and if someone asks for advice, I promise to give it without expressing judgement.

Who's with me??
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Replies

  • Melbel85
    Melbel85 Posts: 240 Member
    I'm with ya!!!
  • ANewLucia
    ANewLucia Posts: 2,081 Member
    I totally agree. I read the same post you are referring to and because of how I felt about it, I opted to not say anything at all. Some of the comments were just so rude. I felt bad.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.
  • Dani724
    Dani724 Posts: 30 Member
    I totally agree! If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!
  • fitaliciag
    fitaliciag Posts: 373
    In all fairness, I do hear you and see where you are coming from, HOWEVER, IF someone is asking for OPINIONS....they should be ready to hear any and all opinions. They are not forced to agree with or accept them.

    Just sayin :)
  • purrteetea
    purrteetea Posts: 24
    @aliciagonzalez25...ditto

    thats called life...we cant make everyone happy...all of the time...thats when love of self comes into play...that way, when the the haters say what they got to say you can "gone brush yo shoulders off" and keep-a steppn'...
  • RozeGod
    RozeGod Posts: 118
    I agree!! Thanks for bringing this up.
  • fitaliciag
    fitaliciag Posts: 373
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!
  • Barneystinson
    Barneystinson Posts: 1,357 Member
    You can still provide guidance if you see something very strange or out of line. As much as we want to be positive, we also need to be realistic about healthy recommendations.
  • Chuckw40
    Chuckw40 Posts: 201
    Although I am not familiar with the thread in question in my opinion there are several people on this site who are only here to start arguments and attack people. They don't post a pic of themselves, or even bother to fill out their profiles. They don;t appear to have any weight loss goals either.

    Anyone else notice this? It seems to be getting worse...
  • sandyfeet10
    sandyfeet10 Posts: 280 Member
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!

    I agree that if you ask a question, you should be prepared for varying opinions. It is just that some people have no class or respect for others and are hurtful in what they say. Those kind of comments are what we need to stay away from.
  • SarahofTwins
    SarahofTwins Posts: 1,169 Member
    Everyone has a right to their own opinion...I always say "to each their own" Now for the haters I say "misery loves company" Just be happy because life is SO short. Love others even if they are your enemies :flowerforyou:
  • LillysGranny
    LillysGranny Posts: 431
    My conscience won't let me ignore behavior that I believe may really hurt someone, but there's no good reason to be ugly about trying to help.
  • JDMPWR
    JDMPWR Posts: 1,863 Member
    In all fairness, I do hear you and see where you are coming from, HOWEVER, IF someone is asking for OPINIONS....they should be ready to hear any and all opinions. They are not forced to agree with or accept them.

    Just sayin :)

    This I agree with. I am a realist, I dont sugar coat stuff, if you want that ask your mommy what she thinks.
  • indeed . am always telling my kids tht if u got nothing nice to say then dont say anything at all. happy postive things all the way :-)
  • rubyrenga
    rubyrenga Posts: 402 Member
    Agreed! And aside from that thread, which I read too, I saw another really rude response from someone earlier today that was not even related to advice or whatever. Just a straight-up attack. What are people's deals? Why be on this site if you are just here to spread negative vibes? I get enough of those in real life!
  • flea2449
    flea2449 Posts: 499 Member
    In all fairness, I do hear you and see where you are coming from, HOWEVER, IF someone is asking for OPINIONS....they should be ready to hear any and all opinions. They are not forced to agree with or accept them.

    Just sayin :)



    I TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU !!!!
  • godroxmysox
    godroxmysox Posts: 1,491 Member
    Absolutely! Discouraging comments are going to make people turn to food for comfort!
  • SMCNEIL40
    SMCNEIL40 Posts: 80 Member
    Totally Agree!! Very good post!
  • freebird240
    freebird240 Posts: 33 Member
    I agree too.. I won't want that to happen to me...
  • maggie4097
    maggie4097 Posts: 156
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!


    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!
  • fidgekitty
    fidgekitty Posts: 43
    Wow, I guess I'm shocked by that, I've never seen anyone outright attack someone one here (but I'm new so I haven't really gotten to know a lot of people yet lol) I'm curious now as to the thread you're referencing, what has is about? What could the person have said to start such an inflammatory response? I can't see why people feel the need to gang up on someone because they don't agree with their opinion, some people can be just outright mean :( Fortunately my own experience on here has been nothing but positive
  • maggie4097
    maggie4097 Posts: 156
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!




    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!

    I didnt' copy that right, but this was for Alicia!
  • ItsTerriC
    ItsTerriC Posts: 436 Member
    I'm in. I've been logging here for a few months and it seems that lately there is an increase in nastiness. Maybe I just didn't read the boards often enough when I first started. I love that we can post almost anything without too much censorship. Just because someone posts their opinion about something doesn't mean that they want to be attacked for it. If I read a post that I don't agree with, I will normally just move on. I have found myself defending the OP just because the attacks are so personal and nasty. I love MFP and all of my super supportive friends, but the meanness has almost made me want to stay away lately.
  • Sweetlvr
    Sweetlvr Posts: 10 Member
    My momma was raised southern, and believe me she drilled that into us about not saying anything unless it was something good, and never hurt anyone's feelings! I'm onboard with you.
  • SeaChele77
    SeaChele77 Posts: 1,103 Member
    I'm with you to a point. As a recoverying bulimic - I have to say its nice so many people were concerned for her. Yes, some were not nice comments and I agree we should remain positive. However, if someone is entering the danger zone of going too far with their weight loss - I think people should not ignore it and say "well its her life her body". As someone who struggled (and stuggle daily) with self image - what *you* see is not what *I* see!! The girl you are referring to, is indeed too thin. She said she spoke with a doctor, which is great - but she is very much on the very thin line of danger!

    If there are concerns I'd rather people tell me than to turn a blind eye!!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
    My conscience won't let me ignore behavior that I believe may really hurt someone, but there's no good reason to be ugly about trying to help.

    This.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
    I would just like to say I am tired of multiple posts telling me what I should say or do. People need to learn to be adults. People need to learn that a person expressing their opinion is just that. Everything should be taken with a gran of salt. People need to learn that expressing a view contrary to theirs is not a personal attack.

    People need to put their big boy/girl pants on.
  • fitaliciag
    fitaliciag Posts: 373
    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!

    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!

    thanks!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
    My conscience won't let me ignore behavior that I believe may really hurt someone, but there's no good reason to be ugly about trying to help.

    This.
This discussion has been closed.