Success Stories Demotivate Me

Kittyfeliz

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

posbey

it is very inspiring! I love that part mostly too.

sloanie1

You have to trust and believe in yourself, without that you will never succeed, no one person is anymore special than anyone else, the difference between succeeding and not succeeding is dedication, commitment and HARD work!! Of course you can do it, you have to take a leap of faith and trust in the process....it takes patience and consistency...I still have a LONG way to go, but I will never EVER give up

poseyj88

Those people probably felt the same way when they weren't at their goals yet. Remember, you CAN do this! You absolutely 100% can! And if they don't motivate you.... don't look. I know you want to celebrate in others' success, but it's okay to focus on yourself.

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

Sissy4EverX3

You're selling yourself short. Only reason I say this is because when I first started this journey to change my life and habits, I said in a FB post I doubted I'd ever weigh anything less than 170lbs. That's what a doctor told me when I was 18 years old. But then, I had an internet friend tell me that I was selling myself short & can do anything I set my mind too. So yes.. losing 225lbs will be difficult, but I WILL weigh between 135-140lbs by the time I'm 35. My point is, you shouldn't let the success stories demotivate you. You should counteract that and use them as means to motivate yourself. You CAN do it and you WILL do it. You go, girl!!

Jeneba

I'd try my best to stop reading/ looking them.... Seems to meeeeee, you may be sabotaging yourself - it is soooooo common for us to do this!

Aesop101

Success stories inspire me.

mlemonroe2

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

well, then, you wont.

Kittyfeliz

Ya, I know I'm being putting my self down, I hardly need others to do it for me. Thank you to those who were trying to use positive reinforcement. I don't know why I bother with the forums. Looking for inspiration in the motivation and support forum, what was I thinking?!

shannaire

Yes u can I thought that but evveryone can motivate u on here which is good x

fh1951

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

Why not?

tavery3700

I understand how you feel, Because I feel the same way.

Why can't I make more progress.

I have been at this since Oct 2010. What gives I can not move out of the 20 pound loss range.

I need some help. :frown:

AngieM76

You have to change your way of thinking. You CAN do this but you have to be able to change the way you think. Trust me, I feel that way sometimes too. And my friends that I have made here on MFP motivate me to keep going by telling me I CAN do this and you know what? They are right. You are worth this 100% and you will do it. Friend request me if you like if you want some support.

nsblue

Kitty I know for many many years, too many to count how i felt I could never get weight off I needed or wanted, and usually that doubt i self fullfilled. I had to make a committment to me.. that I mattered... that my health was worth it and i could do it. I knew i needed to change my lifestyle and my mindset to succeed. It is hardwork but my dear if I can do it so can you. sometime the littlest of things can feel like a mountain, it's not until we just take one step at a time that we see we are nearing the top. Remember the little engine that could? he kept at it, little by little and made it... and so can you. Don't give up on yourself, YOU MATTER and YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Susie_Bee

I got this on my FB the other day:

Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you are right. Remember a positive attitude makes ALL the difference!!

I think you've got the right idea breaking it down into smaller goals. As you achieve each one, you are one step closer to your final success story!

If reading about others demotivates you, stop reading!!! You can do this!

Kelly_Wilson1990

You are what you think! You can do it!!

Kittyfeliz

Why not?

I guess because I've been down this road before but never reached my goal and that it gets harder each time and I lose sight and end up right where I left off. It's hard to imagine ever being somewhere I've never been as an adult. I know I should technically be capable of it but I can't picture it, ya know? Even when I say "I can do this!" in the back of my mind I think "Ya, right". I really don't want to think it so comments like "well you won't" don't really help.

NikkisNewStart

Comments like "well you won't" are the truth, plain and simple. Getting to your goal is going to be hard work but you have to get your head in the game first. How bad do you want it?

I wanted it badly. I told myself I would never ever stop until I made my goal. Was it hard? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes.

The truth is simple... if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.

If you keep self sabotaging you won't reach your goal. Believe in yourself and just make it happen.

Kittyfeliz

Thank you all, I am just feeling lost at the moment. I want to change and hope I can. I really appreciate those that took the time to say something nice, makes me feel less alone.

grandmanita

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

well, then, you wont.

Just so wrong, if you can't be supportive, don't reply. Build up don't break down.

Kittyfeliz

Thank you Grandmanita, I was pretty disturbed by this. Not motivational at all.

Pebble321

It's tough, there's no denying it, and it seems hard to believe that each of us could be there as a success story too.
Would it help to redefine your goals? I've tried so many times to lose weight that saying "my goal is to lose weight" seems too big and too hard.
Instead I decided that my first goal was to record everything I ate, good or bad. That I COULD achieve, and I found that just the act of writing down my meals and snacks made me concious of how much I was eating. Then I decided to set a goal of half a pound a week loss. This meant I didn't have to go too low cal and made it achievable.
And I wanted to run. First day of C25K I ran a total of 6 minutes and nearly died. Today I ran 7.5 km almost non stop.

5 months on and I'm losing slowly and steadily. You can too, but you have to decide that you CAN do it, set the goals that will motivate you, then just get started. Good luck!

jessradtke

You know, I *DO* feel that way sometimes. Not just with weight loss/fitness either. I feel that way about a lot of things. But then that negativity becomes strangely motivating for me because, if I let myself dwell on it for a while, I start to recognize it for what it really is...fear. My fear of failure is often the very thing that is holding me back from succeeding! When I look the fear in the eye (so to speak) I can move forward again. When I'm feeling negative, repeating positive things like "I can do it!" don't always work for me. They do work for some people, but I find that sometimes I have to do the opposite and go *into* the fear and negativity to break free. Only then do the positive mantras start to have any effect.

BigBoneSista

Ya, I know I'm being putting my self down, I hardly need others to do it for me. Thank you to those who were trying to use positive reinforcement. I don't know why I bother with the forums. Looking for inspiration in the motivation and support forum, what was I thinking?!

Don't look at it as them putting you down. Look at it as tuff love. I try to see the positive even in the negative because it helps me. You can't control what others do or say but you can control how you interpret a situation. With that said I'm going to need you to stop putting yourself down thinking that you can't succeed because for some reason everyone else got that "something" that helped them reached their goal and it somehow bypass you. I know you know that's not true. So when your mind starts to go to the negative you have to counteract it with positive reinforcement. "I can obtain my goals." "I am focus." "I can do this."

You have to be your biggest cheerleader.

BigBoneSista

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

well, then, you wont.

Just so wrong, if you can't be supportive, don't reply. Build up don't break down.

Well even though this person didn't pat her on the back...she was telling the truth to a certain extent unfortunately. If she doesn't change the way she thinks about herself she won't succeed. Weight loss is 80% mental. Once you can get pass your own critical thinking, self-doubt and insecurities it will be a breeze. To do that is hard but if you work at it daily it can happen.

yanicka

Ya, I know I'm being putting my self down, I hardly need others to do it for me. Thank you to those who were trying to use positive reinforcement. I don't know why I bother with the forums. Looking for inspiration in the motivation and support forum, what was I thinking?!

Come on, you are 29 years old, time to grow up. This is not putting you down, this is tought love. Life is not always glitters and rainbow. I love this saying ''Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you are right.'' We do not need to tell you you can do it....you have to have it in yourself. Like I can have 100 strangers on the net tell me I will fail, well they do not know me, they have no impact on my life. I would make a list of why you need to succeed, and what can make you fail. Hving a clear understanding of you inner motives (positive and negative) can help you alot.

Good luck

MyFriendLinn

That is soooooooooo not true. Its like the law of gravity, you are saying it will work for other people but not you. Of course the law of gravity will work for you........and if you continue on your new lifestyle and eating plan, ..........the weight loss will happen for you.

You have to trust the process. If you do what your are supposed to do...........your body will respond.

I'm looking forward to the day, when you say....and it will probably be something like this "I can't believe it, but I achieved my goal. I never knew I was an athete but I am, I never knew I had so much power but I do! I made my dream come true, I did, me, me and myself, all those hours of exercise, all those choosing to eat consciously, I DID IT!!!"

And we will all lbe in your front row cheering, smiling at each other because we knew it would happen, we believed in you and we believe in you now. Trust yourself and this process, I have faith in you!!!

fh1951

Why not?

I guess because I've been down this road before but never reached my goal and that it gets harder each time and I lose sight and end up right where I left off. It's hard to imagine ever being somewhere I've never been as an adult. I know I should technically be capable of it but I can't picture it, ya know? Even when I say "I can do this!" in the back of my mind I think "Ya, right". I really don't want to think it so comments like "well you won't" don't really help.

OK, that helps to define the issue. You have very good self knowledge/understanding - the ability to Intensely visualize yourself as the you that you want to become IS the key to reaching your goals! Here's a suggestion that may give you the tools you need to use the amazing power of your subconscious mind to your advantage - read "Psycho-cybernetics" by Dr. Maxwell Maltz. He was a plastic surgeon who became intrigued by the varied reactions of his patients after surgery and made a lifelong study of the visualization process. The book is an easy read, filled with mental exercises to help re-pattern your thinking; it's available at Amazon.com. You should read it, it goes to the heart of what you are feeling you need help with.

tsmith6569

The definition of this section is MOTIVATION & SUPPORT. We need to encourage and uplift one another whenever we can. I was in almost the EXACT same position as you find yourself now. I weighed 158 and had a goal of 135. I had tried and failed multiple times and I looked at success stories and although somewhat encouraged, I figured they were cheating or lying or simply THAT WILL NEVER BE ME! I knew I had to modify that, but it's so hard! But with this site and with the proper amount of motivation (Wedding and Cruise!) I DID do it! I found what worked for me and you will too! Stay strong, fight that feeling of defeat and you will overcome! Add me as a friend and I will do my best to help if I can!

HoneyBadgerVin

Comments like "well you won't" are the truth, plain and simple. Getting to your goal is going to be hard work but you have to get your head in the game first. How bad do you want it?

I wanted it badly. I told myself I would never ever stop until I made my goal. Was it hard? Yes. Was it worth it? Yes.

The truth is simple... if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got.

If you keep self sabotaging you won't reach your goal. Believe in yourself and just make it happen.

Is it just me? I'm obsessed with them and love seeing the changes but I look at the people that have completely transformed and hit their goals and think... That will never be me, I'm not capable of doing what they did.

well, then, you wont.

Just so wrong, if you can't be supportive, don't reply. Build up don't break down.

Well even though this person didn't pat her on the back...she was telling the truth to a certain extent unfortunately. If she doesn't change the way she thinks about herself she won't succeed. Weight loss is 80% mental. Once you can get pass your own critical thinking, self-doubt and insecurities it will be a breeze. To do that is hard but if you work at it daily it can happen.

I have to say there was nothing negative about this at all. A couple of people already mentioned my favorite Henry Ford quote: "Whether you think you can or think you can't - you are right."

I guess I'm not like others who are inspired by rainbows and flowers. Reaching your physical goals is hard work. Period. That's what makes reaching your goals so much more rewarding and worth it. Like you, Kittyfelz, I'm not at all motivated by success stories. Not that they demotivate me, but they just don't give me that spark or fire I need. Myself, I'm a numbers guy. I track everything, my weight, my body fat %, my heartrate, my VO2max, how much weight I lift, how many miles I ride. And the only thing that motivates me is to see my body numbers go down and my activity numbers to go up. Plain and simple. I don't look to others for support because everybody is different. Everybody reaches their goals differently. I know me. And I'm my biggest competitor, critic, and cheerleader all in one. I'm the person to beat. I'm the 1st person to scream at me like a drill sergeant calling me all sorts of names to push me past my limits. I'm the 1st person to congratulate me when I do. Find what works for you. If success stories affect you negatively, stay away from them. Maybe not wanting to be a failure story can motivate you instead. I know not wanting to be an American statistic is motivation for me. Plus I LOVE motivational quotes, the hardcore kind. They totally pump me up.

Just find that spark, that fire that gets you going, and use it.

psmith64

It was other peoples success that drove me to mine. My thought was if they can do it so can I.

You will do it too if that us what you really want.

It is hard work getting there, but if you pace yourself and accept it's not going to happen overnight you will ultimately get there.

I have found the hardest part is maintaining a large loss. I lost 7 stone ( 98 lbs ) in a 12 month period, but over the space of three years I have gained 3 stone back, not drastic, but losing those 3 stone is taking so much more effort, but I will get there, I am not giving up.

Do use others peoples success as a motivator though, as it proves great weight loss can be acheived.

Paul