so the wife says to her husband

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MizuzGee
MizuzGee Posts: 2
in Chit-Chat
A husband and wife were sitting out on their patio relaxing and drinking wine.

"My life would not be the same without you," the wife says. "I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you."

"Is that you or the wine talking?" he asks.

"It's me talking to the wine," she says.

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  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: That is so funny!
  • NHGirl23
    NHGirl23 Posts: 2,657 Member
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    LOL!!!

    How about this one:


    After being married for many years....a wife asked her husband to describe her.


    He looked at her slowly...then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

    She asks..... "What does that mean?"


    He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot.

    She smiled happily and said...."Oh, that's so lovely. .... What about I, J, K?"


    He said, "I'm Just Kidding!"

    His eye is still swollen....but it will get better.............
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped.

    "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex." The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.

    After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.

    "Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25..."
  • mom23nuts
    mom23nuts Posts: 636 Member
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    gotta love the vino!

    that poor deluded hubby!
  • mom23nuts
    mom23nuts Posts: 636 Member
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    A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped.

    "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex." The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.

    After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.

    "Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25..."

    oh good one!!! LOL
  • _beachgirl_
    _beachgirl_ Posts: 3,865 Member
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    A husband and wife were at a romantic dinner celebrating their 40th anniversary, they were talking about how much they love and appreciate each other.

    Suddenly a fairy appeared and told them that she was granting them each a wish for being so dedicated to each for 40 years.

    The wife thought a minute, and asked for 2 tickets for a romantic trip around the world for her and her husband.

    The fairy said, that is a wonderful choice and a testament to the love and life you two share together.

    The husband took a few more minutes to consider his wish. Finally he said, no offense to his wife your gift is very romantic but I need to be practical , and asked the fairy for a wife 30 years younger than him.

    The fairy was very disappointed in his wish but had to grant it.

    So, she turned him into a 95 year old man!

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