Obese children -- a question for them what have kids

TXHunny84

I was a heavy kid and fat teen and let me say......my mom didn't notice. My dad did but he didn't help. He'd make a comment here and there about not eating so much and not sitting in front of the tv....but that is what HE DID too.... So it was like...I learned the eat junk and be not active life-style from my parents. They weren't active and didn't make me be active so I only knew lazy.... Plus I didn't understand(seriously I didn't understand until high school) that junk food made you fat. Yeah I knew it was unhealthy and bad on your body but I didn't understand it made you gain weight. My best friend was a stick figured girl and ate crap food ONLY because she hated fruits and vegetables. Well....she's skinny and eats junk...so it must not be the food she eats, right?... That was my thoughts to it. Plus PORTIONS!!.... I didn't know anythign about portion sizes!??... I'd ask my mom why I was bigger than the other kids and she'd just say "it's because they haven't caughtup to me yet cuz they're younger" or "it'll come off at your growth spurt". I guess she thought I meant height and not weight??....And never realized I was already tall and wasn't going to have another growth spurt??.... :-/

Some parents notice...but they're too lazy themselves to help themselves let alone their kids... (like my dad)

Some don't notice or think nothing of it....like it's just baby fat that will come off as I get older ...(like my mom)

It is only partically the parents fault because mostly I believe the government doesn't do enough to inform the public of what they are really eating.... I mean the parents themselves don't always know the truth about why they're fat and what they're eating because in their childhood they weren't taught.... As as I said before fast food is cheaper and most people live on a budget... It's just a circle that will keep repeating itself generation after generation...

Kids are obese today because for so many they have access to quick fix junk and fast-foods.... We're the generation of computers and video games.... We want MORE for LESS so we go to restaurants with huge portions that don't cost too much so we can afford to eat there again and again.... It's CHEAPER to be fat....at least in the beginning until you develope health problem from it and have to buy expensive medicines because of your poor diet for so many years.... OMG.... I better stop of I'll go on a rant about how awful this country is about TRULY informing the public about what they are consuming and over-consuming at that.

My kids are both naturally thin but who knows how long that will last. I'm always telling them to go outside and play and not watch tv. I don't want them to repeat my every-day -constant struggle to get up and move and not eat junk....

mmtiernan

I have a hard time with the "eating healthy is expensive" bit - especially when I hear this from people who have 52" flat screen TVs, Wiis, X-boxes, every kid with an iPhone and a data plan - really, which is going to help your child live a long, healthy, disease-free life? That iPhone or good food??

The "Don't have the time" excuse is also just that - an excuse. If you really want to feed your children healthy, you will FIND a way. I pre-plan meals on the weekends before I grocery shop, then pre-cut any vegetables that I'll need through out the week and freeze them. Buy quality meats, cut them into meal-sized portions and freeze them. To thaw, just put the next evening's meat into the fridge the thaw through out the next day. Meals are made in 20-30 minutes or less. You can pre-make brown rice or quinoa and freeze it in meal-sized portions. If you aren't going to be home, pre-make the meal the night before and store in the frig to heat and eat the next day. If you really, truly want to feed your family healthy, you will find a way.

Healthy eating and exercise should be an ongoing 'conversation' in the home, either by literally talking about it or through actions (cooking together, exercising together) to make it a lifestyle event.

That being said, setting the example does not always guarantee that the kids will naturally adopt the message - my daughter, once she hit her teens, began eating more 'junk' when with her friends just because that's what they did and so she went along with the crowd - even though she knows it's not healthy and we don't eat that way at home. We did have conversations about it not being the healthiest thing for her to choose but ultimately, until she began to realize on her own that her clothes were not fitting as well did she make the choice to stop eating the junk when around her friends. Sometimes, even though people know the right thing to do, they still have to make the choice to do it on their own - and sometimes (lots of times in my daughter's case!) the kid will have to test out what the parents have been preaching for themselves to actually appreciate the message!

k8edge

My child is a porkchop...I feed him super healthy because of it. But the fact of the matter is, my kid is lazy. I`m more active than he is, but getting him to come mountain bike riding is like pulling teeth. He just b!tches and moans the entire time and we just end up fighting. I enrolled him in football, and the kid walks most of the time...he`s even had to do 10 pushups because he was walking, he did 4. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, or your best intentions, there`s nothing you can do. There are no video games the minute the snow melts, he has to be outside playing, and he does...but that hasn`t slimmed him out any. Not to mention his dad is HUGE...I mean 6`4 270lbs with a large shoulder spance. But his dad wasn`t large when he was 8. One more year and I can take Ash to the gym with me, they have a youth program where they teach them eating healthy and how to lift weights properly, he seems excited about it, so we`ll give it a go...I just wish he wasn`t so lazy.

You seem very negative about your son's weight issues. He probably feeds upon your negativity. Maybe you should see if there is a certain sport/activity that he is interested in. For some reason... Mtn. Biking may just not be his thing. He needs to find the motivation within himself and therefore arguing with him about something in my opinion is the worst thing that you could do.

Enrich him in ways that he wants to get outside and start moving... Forcing him is not the way. Some kids are naturally husky... He may like karate. It teaches discipline and focuses on the individual.

SecretlyBatwoman

Trust me on this: These kids do NOT have a problem with parents having no money. Bassoons cost an arm and a freakin' leg. You simply do not play it unless you have the money to play it. A decent student model will run you $5000, reeds are $20-30 a pop and last a few weeks at the most, I charge $30 a week for lessons, $50 if they make me leave my own apartment to teach them, and if god forbid something breaks it's vomit-inducingly expensive. So unless they are draining their finances so that their kid can play bassoon (unlikely considering the parking lot was full of 'spensive cars and everyone was wearing designer something-or-other) it's not a problem of "can't afford healthy food".
I'm pretty sure I was the poorest person there, and I can totally eat healthy on the cheap.

bcattoes

Parents should take responsibility for not only their child's weight but for their nutritional education and needs. I was always thin as a child and as a teenager. But I was never taught good eating habits and as a result I had to educate myself when I became a parent. I struggled for years with overcoming the bad eating habits from my childhood even though I was not an overweight parent either. Sure we had fast food on occasion and treats even more often, but I made sure my children knew that these were treats and should never be a main source of food or calories.

Fast food may be easier for the parent, but it is not cheaper or quicker than cooking a healthy meal at home. It takes only minutes to cook fish or lean small cuts of meat and vegetables. Whole grains and beans are readily available in many forms for about the same price as processed unhealthy foods. And certainly for less $ and in less time than the gas/time spent driving to, waiting for and paying for fast food. The only convenience of fast food is that the parent doesn't have to prepare it.

perceptualobfuscator

There's a reason the BMI isn't applicable for children - they are still growing. Often, a child who is overweight will undergo physical changes that will change his or her body type in the course of a few months. I know of several people who when from overweight/chubby to normal/lean just because of a growth spurt or other body developments. This is normal, especially at the age group you're talking about.

And trust me, fat kids know that they are fat. Children can be immensely cruel, and bullying regarding body type starts at a very young age. Their parents know too. Remember that teenage girls are very at risk for eating disordered behaviour. Bullying and body changes occurring at the same time often lead to this.

My advice is not to worry about it. It's the parents job to make decisions, and they are far more informed about their child's health. Don't mention it to anyone, but if you want to encourage healthier eating, go ahead. But remember that at that age the kids might have higher metabolisms than you think, or require far more calories than you're aware of (ie: fueling a growth spurt/puberty). And again, normal rules of weight don't necessarily apply to kids.

Navie42

Often, a child who is overweight will undergo physical changes that will change his or her body type in the course of a few months. I know of several people who when from overweight/chubby to normal/lean just because of a growth spurt or other body developments.

When I was a fat kid my pediatrician told me this is largely not the case for the majority of fat kids... it's just another excuse parents tell themselves when in denial about their kids' health. If a child is overweight / obese the situation is only worsened waiting around to see if the next growth spurt evens them out.

In my humble opinion, obese kids need to be told by a health professional that they are obese and will end up eating themselves into an early grave if they don't fix it. People are so worried about feelings and being politically correct, just hand out the blunt honesty, stop making excuses, and start making changes!

emciriaco

This has been SUCH an interesting post to follow. I fully agree with previous posters who have said that every child is different and that kids who are given too many restrictions are the ones who end up sneaking junk foods later.

What I found really interesting is that every parent who posted is well aware of their child's body type. In that way, I'm no different as a mom. I have a precocious 4-year-old boy. My husband and I keep a variety of food in our kitchen, and we don't deny our son anything he wants to eat (within limits, of course; I mean, I wasn't about to let him have a cupcake for dinner).

He just recently began attending a preschool where he has the option of bringing his lunch or purchasing food from the school. At his daycare, they provided food every day, so, in his eyes, the kids who bring lunch are lucky kids to have lunch boxes and food at home. According to him, only the kids who don't have lunch boxes get food from school because the school feels bad for them.

Needless to say, daycare spoiled me and I'm now packing his lunch and snacks every day - something I haven't done since he was an infant and I was sending him to school each day with breastmilk and, later, homemade (or carefully chosen organic) baby food. I sit down with him every Sunday at the dinner table as we eat with my trusty chart beside me, and I ask him to help me fill out the chart by choosing foods to pack each day. And each morning, he peeks into his lunch box to make sure I picked up everything. (This kid has a crazy memory. Did I mention he's precocious?)

The funny thing is what he asks me to put into his lunch box and what he will actually eat. One day, he came home with his lunch box almost completely untouched - but there were only a few carrot sticks left in the bag. Another day, he ate everything except the cookies I packed. Another day he asked me (quite politely) to add some salad (lettuce) to his sandwich because "turkey sandwiches taste better with salad."

As for activity - this kid is extremely active. He always has been. He's not a daredevil; he is very deliberate in what he does. And he plays video games; don't get me wrong. But he'll choose Wii Boxing (complete with jumping around enough to make Muhammed Ali proud) over Lego Star Wars (which he also loves), and has never turned down an invitation to take his tricycle or scooter or "motorcycle" (really a motorized tricycle) and join me for a few laps around the block.

My husband and I both work full time, and his school is a good 30 minutes from our house, so we do our best to give him home cooked not-from-a-box meals. Probably 2 or 3 times a week, he'll get something that's premade, but I'm a careful label-reader and screen everything to make sure I'm not filling his little body with crap.

With all that said, he's right in the middle in the weight percentiles (and has been since he was 2 weeks old; this child lost only 2 ounces in the hospital after birth) and in the 70s or 80s in height. I monitor all of this religiously because obesity runs in my husband's family (both my mother-in-law and sister-in-law are obese, though they'd never admit it) and heart disease runs rampant on both sides of the family (my mother died of a stroke at 61 and my father-in-law has already had one heart attack). I'm hopeful for his health, given his current predisposition for healthier foods, but I'm mindful of what he's going to face at school, too.

I can give him a solid foundation. The rest will ultimately be up to him. But you can be sure I won't be turning a blind eye if his weight gets out of control or becomes problematic.

Barneystinson

Often, a child who is overweight will undergo physical changes that will change his or her body type in the course of a few months. I know of several people who when from overweight/chubby to normal/lean just because of a growth spurt or other body developments.

When I was a fat kid my pediatrician told me this is largely not the case for the majority of fat kids... it's just another excuse parents tell themselves when in denial about their kids' health. If a child is overweight / obese the situation is only worsened waiting around to see if the next growth spurt evens them out.

In my humble opinion, obese kids need to be told by a health professional that they are obese and will end up eating themselves into an early grave if they don't fix it. People are so worried about feelings and being politically correct, just hand out the blunt honesty, stop making excuses, and start making changes!

I wasn't obese at any point in childhood but fell into the overweight category for much of elementary school. I don't know what happened, but once I turned 17 I leaned out considerably without a lot of effort.

I had a lot of struggles as a younger kid. Generally moving around more outside would help, but I always hovered above that healthy/ideal weight. My mom was actually the opposite of helpful most of the time. I was so painfully aware of being overweight I had a lot of issues into adulthood with self image. I really wish I had opportunities as a kid to meet with a nutritionist or RD about my eating habits and outlook. Parents may have good intentions but just end up projecting their own frustrations and poor nutritional "insight" onto their progeny.

So awareness is good, but beware of how you educate and inform...

Huskeryogi

I'm happy to say they eat better than I did, and enjoy their veggies MUCH more than I did as a child. One trick that I did when they were younger was to cut up cucumbers or peppers, leave them on the counter, tell the kids NOT to eat them and walk away. It became a game, and they now will sometimes stick their little fingers up there before I'm even done cutting they like them so much!

LOVE this! I hope I remember this trick when I have kids.

lilRicki

My child is a porkchop...I feed him super healthy because of it. But the fact of the matter is, my kid is lazy. I`m more active than he is, but getting him to come mountain bike riding is like pulling teeth. He just b!tches and moans the entire time and we just end up fighting. I enrolled him in football, and the kid walks most of the time...he`s even had to do 10 pushups because he was walking, he did 4. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, or your best intentions, there`s nothing you can do. There are no video games the minute the snow melts, he has to be outside playing, and he does...but that hasn`t slimmed him out any. Not to mention his dad is HUGE...I mean 6`4 270lbs with a large shoulder spance. But his dad wasn`t large when he was 8. One more year and I can take Ash to the gym with me, they have a youth program where they teach them eating healthy and how to lift weights properly, he seems excited about it, so we`ll give it a go...I just wish he wasn`t so lazy.

You seem very negative about your son's weight issues. He probably feeds upon your negativity. Maybe you should see if there is a certain sport/activity that he is interested in. For some reason... Mtn. Biking may just not be his thing. He needs to find the motivation within himself and therefore arguing with him about something in my opinion is the worst thing that you could do.

Enrich him in ways that he wants to get outside and start moving... Forcing him is not the way. Some kids are naturally husky... He may like karate. It teaches discipline and focuses on the individual.

did you miss the part where I said he played football? What do I do about laziness? Grab his hand and haul him around the block with me? It's not what he's eating, he doesn't move...and when he moves, it's slow. No way do I call him fatty, or judge him by how big he is, in fact when he tells me he's fat I stop and talk to him about it...you seem very condisending and judgemental about how someone raises their kids, all based on a stupid comment on a forum...Don't tell me how to raise my son, or what the worst thing I can do, the best thing you can do is keep your nose to yourself. If you have the time to take the kid to karate while working full time and running a household (not to mention squeezing in a work out) plus 4 football practices a week and tournements on weekend, then be my guest.

hbrekkaas

I think a childs weigt is almost completely in control of the parents, and there is definalty no-one else to blame. Its not the schools fault for the crappy food they serve (here at least), its not the fast food indrusties fault, its not because chips and pop are so readily avaliable. If you don't want them to eat it, don't buy it. Our schools are also wonderful. They don't sell juice, pop, chips or candy. Everything that is sold is made in the school. The canteen (no cafeterias) sells one meal a day, and its things from lasagna to beef stew. They always have salads and fruit avaliable. The "free/lunch program" lunches are a sandwich on whole wheat, a granola bar, milk and fruit.

I have 3 kids. My oldest daughter looks just like me and my mom and has a very small frame. She loves veggies and would gladly have carrot sticks over chips, or a home cooked meal over fast food. My other two kids take after my hubby and his family. They are all very tall, overweight people. The men have wide shoulders and broad chests and huge frames. The woman all have fairly big frames too and are quite tall. Those two kids are huge candy fans and would rather have a chicken nugget then an apple any day. They are quite tall also but they are not overweight. My son looks like a body builder, at 19 months old. Huge hands and feet, wide shoulders and chest.

But we have never, and will ever, use the "they are big boned" or "its genetic" as an excuse for them to get chunky. We don't buy the junk foods that they want. They don't eat veggies but every single night they get them on their plate anyway, along with some fruit that they will eat. If they want nuggets I make them myself so I can control what goes into them. They still get treats, baked chips, homemade popsicles (made with pureed frozen fruit) homemade cookies for dessert after dinner, 1 cup of 100% juice with breakfast. We buy the food, I prepare it, we can control what they get. For us its a matter of putting in the time and effort to make things as healthy as possible, and I am lucky enough that I am a stay at home mom and have the time to do it. It is a challenge to feed our youngest because he is allergic to dairy and soy, but we make it work.

They have snack and meal times, there is no all day grazing. They eat whole wheats, not white bread, we do not buy sugary cereals, pop or any prepacked meals/cookies. We do buy the occasional box of fruit snacks as a treat.

We also have them as active as possible. We play outside, go to the park, go for walks, bike ride, and the oldest two are in sports through-out the year.

We are also teaching our oldest (and we will teach the toddlers when they are old enough) about healthy choices, what good foods do for our bodies and and what bad foods do to them, portion control, everything in moderation, and the importance of exercise.

rachel0923

It seems like parents are the key here, which is probably correct. We just need to remember that SAHM is not the norm any more. It's all a household can do to get the laundry done and enough food in the fridge to last a week, much less spend their two hours at home each evening preparing, cooking, and cleaning up a meal and then dragging everybody outside to play before doing baths and bedtime. There are different challenges now than there were years ago. A drive-thru is definitely faster than the grocery store after work, and that can be solved by meal-planning and having everything on hand. I don't even have kids in extracurricular activities yet and it's still a race to get home fast enough to feed them before they scream!

I have a hard time making good choices at a drive-thru, so tend to stick to mostly-microwave meals (steamed veggies and chicken), but I can totally understand how a parent loses control of their child's eating habits. I don't know what the answer is. When I was a SAHM for six months I know I cooked more and was healthier myself and it was probably better for my kids that way, but not many families even have that option anymore. For me it is about priorities. If I can make healthy meals 75% of the time and get my kids out and running 75% of our leisure time, we are on track.

bcattoes

It seems like parents are the key here, which is probably correct. We just need to remember that SAHM is not the norm any more. It's all a household can do to get the laundry done and enough food in the fridge to last a week, much less spend their two hours at home each evening preparing, cooking, and cleaning up a meal and then dragging everybody outside to play before doing baths and bedtime. There are different challenges now than there were years ago. A drive-thru is definitely faster than the grocery store after work, and that can be solved by meal-planning and having everything on hand. I don't even have kids in extracurricular activities yet and it's still a race to get home fast enough to feed them before they scream!

I have a hard time making good choices at a drive-thru, so tend to stick to mostly-microwave meals (steamed veggies and chicken), but I can totally understand how a parent loses control of their child's eating habits. I don't know what the answer is. When I was a SAHM for six months I know I cooked more and was healthier myself and it was probably better for my kids that way, but not many families even have that option anymore. For me it is about priorities. If I can make healthy meals 75% of the time and get my kids out and running 75% of our leisure time, we are on track.

Dinner need not take 2 hrs. From the time my children were very small I was a single mom working a full time job with not much money, but I still cooked my girls healthy meals most days. As you say, it does take planning. And creativity. I was cooking 30 minute meals long before anyone ever heard of Rachael Ray. I didn't make everything from scratch though. Canned and frozen ingredients were my friends. But not frozen meals. Most are so processed that much of the nutrition is lost.

rachel0923

It seems like parents are the key here, which is probably correct. We just need to remember that SAHM is not the norm any more. It's all a household can do to get the laundry done and enough food in the fridge to last a week, much less spend their two hours at home each evening preparing, cooking, and cleaning up a meal and then dragging everybody outside to play before doing baths and bedtime. There are different challenges now than there were years ago. A drive-thru is definitely faster than the grocery store after work, and that can be solved by meal-planning and having everything on hand. I don't even have kids in extracurricular activities yet and it's still a race to get home fast enough to feed them before they scream!

I have a hard time making good choices at a drive-thru, so tend to stick to mostly-microwave meals (steamed veggies and chicken), but I can totally understand how a parent loses control of their child's eating habits. I don't know what the answer is. When I was a SAHM for six months I know I cooked more and was healthier myself and it was probably better for my kids that way, but not many families even have that option anymore. For me it is about priorities. If I can make healthy meals 75% of the time and get my kids out and running 75% of our leisure time, we are on track.

Dinner need not take 2 hrs. From the time my children were very small I was a single mom working a full time job with not much money, but I still cooked my girls healthy meals most days. As you say, it does take planning. And creativity. I was cooking 30 minute meals long before anyone ever heard of Rachael Ray. I didn't make everything from scratch though. Canned and frozen ingredients were my friends. But not frozen meals. Most are so processed that much of the nutrition is lost.

I wasn't saying that it takes two hours to do dinner and clean it up. I meant dinner (45-60 minutes), outside, baths, and bedtime altogether takes up the entire two hours at home. I prefer 15 minute meals, with the ingredients already in the pantry and the dishwasher emptied and ready to be refilled

mmtiernan

Trust me on this: These kids do NOT have a problem with parents having no money. Bassoons cost an arm and a freakin' leg. You simply do not play it unless you have the money to play it. A decent student model will run you $5000, reeds are $20-30 a pop and last a few weeks at the most, I charge $30 a week for lessons, $50 if they make me leave my own apartment to teach them, and if god forbid something breaks it's vomit-inducingly expensive. So unless they are draining their finances so that their kid can play bassoon (unlikely considering the parking lot was full of 'spensive cars and everyone was wearing designer something-or-other) it's not a problem of "can't afford healthy food".
I'm pretty sure I was the poorest person there, and I can totally eat healthy on the cheap.

I have to say, this totally burns my butt!! I am a single parent and have worked hard to give my daughter many of the advantages that the parents you describe are also providing and I have seen time and time again that the parents are willing to shell out any amount of money 'for the good of the kids', which really turns out to be for the convenience of the parents! They pay so that they can drop the kid off somewhere and then leave to go do their own thing. These are not involved parents, they are convenience parents. Now, I'm not saying that the parents of your students are specifically this way, but I've had my daughter involved in music, in chess clubs, in martial arts and in figure skating - out of 30 or so kids involved in these activities at a given time, only a scant 4 or 5 parents are there each and every time, cheering the child on and guiding their children. These same absent parents will drop the kids off with money to buy food with no guidance and the kids are snacking and eating garbage. I'm not talking about a couple of kids being dropped off like this - it's the majority.

I understand that money is not the issue in every case, although it is a common excuse for not eating healthy. I really agree with the other posters in that the parents are not stepping up to the task. Rich and poor alike.

mrschappet

My youngest child is overweight and its really hard on me. And at this point, I dont know what to do. Any help would be appreciated. He does not live with me full time. He splits his time between my house and his dads. I have tried numerous times to talk to his dad and his grandma about this but they continue to feed him the unhealthy choices. I feel like he eats well at my house and then goes back to his dads and the pattern continues. I dont know what to do anymore.

I would talk to your child's doctor about it.. have your child'd dad attend the appointment so that he hears the same information that you do. If the doctor has concerns about your child's weight he can give you both ideas on how to handle it. and this way your ex is getting the information from the doctor, not you... maybe he will be more receptive that way.

RoadDog

I have three daughters. One has never had a weight problem. One is struggling. One is still a teen, but I don't know if she'll have a problem later in life. Problem for me is they are all girls and I don't think I should comment one way or the other. Don't want to take a chance of damaging their self-esteem. The best I can do is try my best to set a good example for them.

They all are intelligent and know how to make good decisions, but, like all of us, sometimes make bad decisions. They will find their way on their own.

I will love them and support them whether they are 100 lbs or 300 lbs.

SecretlyBatwoman

Trust me on this: These kids do NOT have a problem with parents having no money. Bassoons cost an arm and a freakin' leg. You simply do not play it unless you have the money to play it. A decent student model will run you $5000, reeds are $20-30 a pop and last a few weeks at the most, I charge $30 a week for lessons, $50 if they make me leave my own apartment to teach them, and if god forbid something breaks it's vomit-inducingly expensive. So unless they are draining their finances so that their kid can play bassoon (unlikely considering the parking lot was full of 'spensive cars and everyone was wearing designer something-or-other) it's not a problem of "can't afford healthy food".
I'm pretty sure I was the poorest person there, and I can totally eat healthy on the cheap.

I have to say, this totally burns my butt!! I am a single parent and have worked hard to give my daughter many of the advantages that the parents you describe are also providing and I have seen time and time again that the parents are willing to shell out any amount of money 'for the good of the kids', which really turns out to be for the convenience of the parents! They pay so that they can drop the kid off somewhere and then leave to go do their own thing. These are not involved parents, they are convenience parents. Now, I'm not saying that the parents of your students are specifically this way, but I've had my daughter involved in music, in chess clubs, in martial arts and in figure skating - out of 30 or so kids involved in these activities at a given time, only a scant 4 or 5 parents are there each and every time, cheering the child on and guiding their children. These same absent parents will drop the kids off with money to buy food with no guidance and the kids are snacking and eating garbage. I'm not talking about a couple of kids being dropped off like this - it's the majority.

I understand that money is not the issue in every case, although it is a common excuse for not eating healthy. I really agree with the other posters in that the parents are not stepping up to the task. Rich and poor alike.

The one kid I teach has wonderful supportive parents who always go to our student-teacher orchestra rehearsals and have a conversation with me about what their daughter should rehearse at the end of each lesson. The other, if I've seen his parents twice I'll be surprised. I go to their house. I usually just talk to the housekeeper. I want him to join the orchestra too but I doubt they'll be interested in taking him. He's really a good student though. I don't know the other kids personally but there wasn't the usual "which kid is yours?" banter which totally weirded me out. I'm 25 and my parents still say "the one with the green hair is my kid!" every time I perform, haha. Augh. Now I'm off topic... But I have had to yell at him for eating something sticky-sugary right before he played. You'll damage the reed!!!