"Eat everything in moderation" VENT!

joejccva71

"Eat everything in moderation" is a weak-minded person's way of saying "it's ok if I eat alot of high trans fat food, sweets, sodas and all the other crap processed food as long as I don't eat alot of it"

Sheesh - I am NOT weak-minded at all and I believe whole-heartedly in 'everything in moderation'! First, for the record, I rarely drink soda or consume a lot of trans-fats and processed food. To me, 'everything in moderation' means I lose weight without doing anything special or following a rigorous plan. Everything in moderation means I eat like my naturally thin friends who don't have long lists of food rules and hang-ups.

Eating in moderation means that I get to enjoy my awesome homemade pizza with fresh tomato sauce and crust I made myself. I also eat cake, cookies and ice cream when I want them - just not in gaping portions and not at every single meal. I make almost everything I eat at home with fresh ingredients - and almost nothing I make is 'diet food'. I watch my portions. I track my calories. I exercise. I don't label foods as 'good' or 'bad'. I don't believe in deprivation or saying 'I will never eat THAT again in my life'. I refuse to diet... period. It doesn't work for me.

I think people need to respect differences and accept that what works for one person, might not work for another. 'Everything in Moderation' is working for me. I've lost 25 pounds in 3 months - easily and happily, with no hunger or cravings. Calling people who don't agree with you 'weak-minded' just seems rude. Your post just really rubbed me the wrong way.

My post is a wake up call for alot of people, nothing more. It's not being rude. If you took it that way, then you are overly sensitive.

Everyday I see post after post, thread after thread of people who originally lost some weight, then either plateau'd or worse started to gain a few lbs. Then they come here and complain. And maybe not always but alot of times it's because they thought they were eating at a deficit with the "eat everything in moderation" but calories CAN and DO sneak up on you if you aren't accurate. Next thing you know you are not losing weight anymore.

Don't be so overly sensitive.

Judgirl83

I completely understand your pain. I suffer greatly from binge eating. I had lost 90 lbs and was almost at my goal weight. For me I had to do a very strick program under my doctors advice (do to my food additction) so I did medifast. Its not for everyone but it let me eat without having a fear of binge eating.

Once I got to my 90 lbs lost I decided to transition back to normal food like the program says and just "eat healthy". I did really really well for about 3 monhts. I then went out with friends and ate one of my favorite dishes. That unleashed a binge fest that lasted almost a month. I am honestly addicted to food. I dont want to be bad and binge eat, but it is like I almost have no control. Once I do it I cry and cry. I have always struggled with this addiction even as a small child. In my teenage years I resulted to purging. I finally got that stopped but never got control of the binging. So I balloned in weight.

I thought once I got into a healthy wieght that I would be a different person, that I could eat in moderation. Truth is, I am still the same "fat chick" just in a smaller package. I realize now this will be a fight for me EVERY DAY! and that is very overwhelming. I know know there will be certain foods I can never eat. That really saddens me, but due to the fact that my mom suffers from food addiction too, I know if I dont get control of this now and don't follow through with depriving myself of my favorite foods, I am going to end up being obese again with sevear health issues. I see my mom and know that is my future if I dont fight this.

I wish you the best of luck. Do what you have to do to keep the bing eating in control.

joejccva71

It's amazing how sensitive people are on this forum. Did I really hurt someone's feelings? lol

keiraev

I am slowly learning to eat everything in moderation.

I used to never be able to have one cookie from the tin or one chocolate out of the box but I have amazed myself since doing MFP that I CAN just have one and don't need to have them all- and I'm allowed to have one as long as it fits into my allowance

Txnurse97

Yep, that's me too. I have to stay away from a lot of stuff or I just start binging. Portion control is very tough for me.

You mentioned the 100 calorie packs...reminds me of when I did Nutrisystem. Doesn't work if you eat your weekly desserts all in one night!

kklindsey

I'm with you. I posted a while ago about food not being my friend. If you have trigger foods and will eat past reason it is NECESSARY for you to take pleasure out of the equation of food. Not that you have to eat things that taste like crap but you can't eat the things that make your mouth water, your eyes roll back and your head and turn you into Homer Simpson looking at a donut. Just can't do it. I have a donut maybe once a year. I have candy bars even less. As soon as I find a good for me food that I LOVE I have to take it out of the house because I will eat 3 or 4 of them in one sitting. Not everyone suffers this way with food so I understand if they DON"T understand but for some of us it is just a fact.

CARNAT22

It's amazing how sensitive people are on this forum. Did I really hurt someone's feelings? lol

I get your point - but your phrasing wasn't that great!

I am a great believer in making the most of my calories (I have been on 1200 cals for 6 months so I NEED to make the most of them)

I know that having a controlled portion of carbs, some tasty protein (normally chicken or turkey prepared with spices / healthy marinades) and a huge serving of salad and or veggies means I get a massive dinner for less than 500 cals. I know I'd use more calories if I had small fries and Hamburger from MacDonalds.

However to me moderation doesn't mean using my calories to eat less junk, it means occasionally having something not so healthy if I really want it... Moderation means having the option of choice and never having to say "no" to a small portion of something I really enjoy.

I have been here a while now and I know that I'd much rather have my healthy dinner with all that glorious, fresh food instead of a crappy take away BUT if someone said to me "you can never have a take away again" it would be counter-productive.

I am not here to ban myself from eating certain things I am here to re-educate myself!

kklindsey

no body has trigger foods sorry to say!
it is triggers that make you eat foods..i.e stress,emotion and bordom...if you can beat these the rest comes easy!

That is not true. I can eat carrots and not feel the slightest urge to overeat, but if I have a doughnut I ALWAYS want 2 or 3.

:laugh: EXACTLY. I have never bined on lettuce.Or burgers for that matter, though I like them. Donuts, show me a box and I will empty it. A bag of cookies, gotta get 'em all.

UpEarly

It's amazing how sensitive people are on this forum. Did I really hurt someone's feelings? lol

You certainly didn't 'hurt my feelings'. I just categorically disagree with your opinion.

MinnieInMaine

Different strokes, different folks. What works for me, may not work for others. Etc, etc.

Personally? I eat in moderation. I do not deny myself any of the things I enjoy or like, I just cut back on how much and how often I eat them. I also try something new every week because who knows? I may discover a new favorite that isn't "bad for me."

If I deny myself one of the things I love to eat, then I become sort of obsessed with it and wind up binging on it. By allowing myself these things, I never become obsessed. All I need is a taste of it and I'm good.

That may not work for others.

Basically, figure out what works for you and gets you to your goals and that is all that matters. I pretty much ignore the experts and the advice of others because I know my own body and I know what works for me.

This is exactly how I am too. Wish I could avoid all those things that I love but the harder I try to stay away, the more I want them and in the past, this is why diets have failed for me. I get sick of being unhappy without my fave foods and I give up. The best example is when I was on Atkins for a year. I dropped 40-50 pounds and even allowed myself a cheat day each week so I wasn't deprived. Then I went on vacation with some friends and really indulged and realized I missed things like yogurt and cereal and other normal foods. Part of that was reactiviating the sugar addiction but still, point is, I was missing food and couldn't get away from it.

Now I eat what I like but exercise to make up for the extra calories or keep my portions in check (or both) and it works for me.

And by the way - it is not weak-minded BS...sure some people use it that way but those who truly follow the principle don't.
ETA: my feelings are hurt - you just weren't too tactful with your generalizations and terminology

dad106

It's amazing how sensitive people are on this forum. Did I really hurt someone's feelings? lol

It's not being overly sensitive nor did you hurt my feelings.

I like another poster disagree with you and hated your choice of wording. Just because people don't do exactly what you do, doesn't mean that they are "weak-minded" or that it's a bull-**** term.

Moderation does work for some if your careful.. and if you don't like reading others complain how they platu'd or gained weight, then don't read those posts. It's as simple as that.

Teemo

In my opinion, food addicts are comparable to any other type of drug addict- except, the sucky thing is that food food addicts- cant live without food- drug addicts can live without drugs. It's a hard situation: I have to face my addiction everyday (just like every other addict), but meanwhile, I still have to consume my addiction. You don't tell a crack head "Oh, just a little bit of crack in moderation."-- then why tell a food addict "oh, just a little bit of everything in moderation."

Other than for sugar, which may be biologically addictive, saying that you have a food addiction just sounds like a convenient way to say you aren't responsible for your overeating. And even if it were true, you aren't addicted to "food". You're addicted to "junk food".

Otherwise, you'd be overeating carrot sticks and chicken breasts.

I honestly can't stand this- my family and friends say it to me all the time- they probably don't understand, and that's OK.... but, in all honesty, if it tastes good, its so hard for me to eat it in moderation. There is no detox program for food addicts, there's no going "cold turkey"- we need to eat to live.

Again, see above. You can easily go "cold turkey" on junk. Plenty of people do. You think the people who stay lean year-round don't enjoy ice cream or potato chips or chocolate or candy? Newsflash: they love it just as much as you do. But they've made a choice not to eat it because it's counterproductive to their goals.

You can't go "cold turkey" on FOOD but, again, your addiction isn't to food.

I know this is might be a confusing "rant"- I'm just irritated right now. People have been nagging me about calorie intake (I eat around 1000, and my Dr. is aware), but its only because of this food addiction- i can't overcome it physically until I can overcome it mentally- and I can't overcome in mentally right now if I eat everything in "moderation"- it just doesn't work like that.

Then don't eat everything in moderation. I'm not sure what the problem is here... if you can't control your ability to eat, say, potato chips in moderation then DON'T. But realize that you CAN, without it harming y our goals. That's another difference, btw, between your comparison of drugs (e.g., crack) and junk food.

A little bit of crack is harmful. A little bit of junk food... not so much.

Any advice? Am I the only one who feels like this?

No. Let's be serious: EVERYONE likes junk food. It's delicious. And if I could eat junk food 24/7 I would. I can very easily put down 5,000+ calories in a single sitting of buffalo wings, kettle chips, and cookies. But I don't. Because it doesn't fit in with the goals I've set for myself.

TK421NotAtPost

i'm SO sick of hearing "eat everything in moderation".... For the majority of people it might be great! But when you're a food addict it's SO hard.

I'm not sure if its just me, but speaking as a food addict, I cant eat "everything in moderation". It's all or nothing- I have trigger foods (being anything that tastes good), and once I consume that, it' can be hard to stop (not always- but most of the time.)

In my opinion, food addicts are comparable to any other type of drug addict- except, the sucky thing is that food food addicts- cant live without food- drug addicts can live without drugs. It's a hard situation: I have to face my addiction everyday (just like every other addict), but meanwhile, I still have to consume my addiction. You don't tell a crack head "Oh, just a little bit of crack in moderation."-- then why tell a food addict "oh, just a little bit of everything in moderation."

I honestly can't stand this- my family and friends say it to me all the time- they probably don't understand, and that's OK.... but, in all honesty, if it tastes good, its so hard for me to eat it in moderation. There is no detox program for food addicts, there's no going "cold turkey"- we need to eat to live.

I know this is might be a confusing "rant"- I'm just irritated right now. People have been nagging me about calorie intake (I eat around 1000, and my Dr. is aware), but its only because of this food addiction- i can't overcome it physically until I can overcome it mentally- and I can't overcome in mentally right now if I eat everything in "moderation"- it just doesn't work like that.

Ok, done.

Any advice? Am I the only one who feels like this?

I'm really glad you brought this up. I'm a believer that for the majority of people out there, simply trying to eat things in moderation while making whole, clean foods the foundation of your diet will work work.

But I also know that telling a person who has a food addiction to simply "eat less" is akin to telling an alcoholic to drink less, or a junkie to ease up on the drugs. Not a perfect analogy, but the underlying dynamics are similar.

A few years ago, I read a book called Flexible Dieting by Lyle McDonald which showed that people who adhere to a flexible eating plan are more successful in losing weight. As an example, when following a rigid dieting plan you try to resist eating that cookie that's been on your mind for a few days. Eventually you cave in and eat one cookie and figure that you’ve blown your diet and might as well eat the entire bag. You feel as if you were weak willed and pathetic for having that cookie, the guilt sets in and you might as well just start eating and eating and eating.

In a flexible dieting plan, instead of trying to resist everything that you think is bad for you, you try to adhere to the notion that having a few so-called bad things here and there isn't the end of the world. Studies have shown that when you take PLANNED breaks from your diet and have a few cookies , or a PLANNED cheat meal here and there, long-term weight loss is more successful and the chances of bingeing go down.

Again, you might be reading this and saying to yourself, "if I plan a break and eat 3 oreo cookies, I will still end up eating the entire bag". But I really think it might be worth a try because it certainly worked for me.

daddyratty

You are so right. I don't make a big deal of it IRL, but food addiction is a serious thing, and I know there are some foods that will just open the floodgates. I don't EVER want to assume that I'll be beyond this, either. I have resigned myself to weighing and tracking the rest of my life (the payoff is immense!).

Teemo

As an example, when following a rigid dieting plan you try to resist eating that cookie that's been on your mind for a few days. Eventually you cave in and eat one cookie and figure that you’ve blown your diet and might as well eat the entire bag. You feel as if you were weak willed and pathetic for having that cookie, the guilt sets in and you might as well just start eating and eating and eating.

It's also why "planned cheat days" are generally a bad idea, especially if you equate "cheat day" to "eat whatever I want and gorge day". You'll just end up obsessing on it.

"Okay, three more days and then I'm going to go bananas at the Cheesecake factory."
"Okay, two more days now... I'm definitely going to get that entire cheesecake with strawberry toppings all over it..."
"Okay, one more day... ah, screw it I'm having the cheesecake now. And since I already had the cheesecake, I might as well have.... etc."

TK421NotAtPost

As an example, when following a rigid dieting plan you try to resist eating that cookie that's been on your mind for a few days. Eventually you cave in and eat one cookie and figure that you’ve blown your diet and might as well eat the entire bag. You feel as if you were weak willed and pathetic for having that cookie, the guilt sets in and you might as well just start eating and eating and eating.

It's also why "planned cheat days" are generally a bad idea, especially if you equate "cheat day" to "eat whatever I want and gorge day". You'll just end up obsessing on it.

"Okay, three more days and then I'm going to go bananas at the Cheesecake factory."
"Okay, two more days now... I'm definitely going to get that entire cheesecake with strawberry toppings all over it..."
"Okay, one more day... ah, screw it I'm having the cheesecake now. And since I already had the cheesecake, I might as well have.... etc."

Well, that would be the wrong way to implement a cheat day for sure. But like I said above, when you have a planned cheat day, your long-term weight loss is more successful than when you 'cave-in' and start cheating on your meals.

msblueyes5

Moderation in this case simply refers to restricting your intake by some measure. If you can't have any of a food without triggering a craving, then moderation in this case = zero.

Eat in moderation isn't a weak minded thing at all though. In fact it probably takes more self-control to lower your intake than it is to cut it out completely.

^^ I completely agree with this! If I cut out a food it sucks but I can handle it. When I decide to have some I can't stop! Well I can sometimes but you get my point! Once you get the taste for it it is harder to stop eating it rather than to not have eaten it at all.

lmarshel

Sounds like you know what works for you. You've discussed it with your doctor and are working through the problem. Why does it matter so much to you what other people say? Just keep working your program and ignore people who don't support you.

Eats_With_A_Fist

Moderation in this case simply refers to restricting your intake by some measure. If you can't have any of a food without triggering a craving, then moderation in this case = zero.

Eat in moderation isn't a weak minded thing at all though. In fact it probably takes more self-control to lower your intake than it is to cut it out completely.

Dude...you nailed it!

lkmisztela

no body has trigger foods sorry to say!
it is triggers that make you eat foods..i.e stress,emotion and bordom...if you can beat these the rest comes easy!

That's simply not true. If there is a bag of Cheetos in the house I'm going to eat that bag of Cheetos no matter what my mood is. And that's why I have a "no Cheetos allowed" rule in my house.

Yep. Trigger foods are real. Maybe YOU don't have trigger foods, but some of us do. For me, it's sugar. And pizza.

Exactly this - it's very individual. Some are emotional eaters, some people can't handle eating a small portion of certain foods.. it's not a one size fits all kind of thing.

lissarv68

This is exactly how I am too. Wish I could avoid all those things that I love but the harder I try to stay away, the more I want them and in the past, this is why diets have failed for me. I get sick of being unhappy without my fave foods and I give up. The best example is when I was on Atkins for a year. I dropped 40-50 pounds and even allowed myself a cheat day each week so I wasn't deprived. Then I went on vacation with some friends and really indulged and realized I missed things like yogurt and cereal and other normal foods. Part of that was reactiviating the sugar addiction but still, point is, I was missing food and couldn't get away from it.

Now I eat what I like but exercise to make up for the extra calories or keep my portions in check (or both) and it works for me.

And by the way - it is not weak-minded BS...sure some people use it that way but those who truly follow the principle don't.
ETA: my feelings are hurt - you just weren't too tactful with your generalizations and terminology

I did the Atkins too, a couple of decades ago, I don't think I've ever been so miserable in my entire life! I'm not a big meat eater, meat is sort of like an after thought for me, and that diet is all about the protein. I lost 30 lbs in about 2 months which was my goal. Soon as I reached it, I stopped doing the diet and the weight came back and brought some heavy friends with it!

This time around, I'm approaching it from a different angle (I also have about 3xs as much weight to lose). My mother was born in Spain and she has that whole European lifestyle of "anything in moderation." My mother has a great figure so I adopted her life style. She has her glass of wine every night, she eats cake, she eats bread. But I've never seen her eat the entire thing. She generally takes a bite or two of the cake and is done. I'm finding that I can do the same thing and the pounds started coming off fairly quickly.

Eating in moderation is not for the weak as some may think. It takes a heck of a lot of will power and determination to stop at that one bite or half a serving. If you cannot do that? Then definitely this is not something for you. I can do it and it prevents me from craving different foods.

Also, eating in moderation does not mean that you can eat all the bad food you want. It means that you allow yourself some bad food along with that so-called good food. It doesn't mean that you continue on your merry high-salt, high-fat, high-etc, etc way and just eat less of it. It means that the foods you love that are bad for you become the accompaniment to the diet and not the star of it.

Shrug, least that's what it means to me.

TK421NotAtPost

"Eat everything in moderation" is a weak-minded person's way of saying "it's ok if I eat alot of high trans fat food, sweets, sodas and all the other crap processed food as long as I don't eat alot of it"

Sheesh - I am NOT weak-minded at all and I believe whole-heartedly in 'everything in moderation'! First, for the record, I rarely drink soda or consume a lot of trans-fats and processed food. To me, 'everything in moderation' means I lose weight without doing anything special or following a rigorous plan. Everything in moderation means I eat like my naturally thin friends who don't have long lists of food rules and hang-ups.

Eating in moderation means that I get to enjoy my awesome homemade pizza with fresh tomato sauce and crust I made myself. I also eat cake, cookies and ice cream when I want them - just not in gaping portions and not at every single meal. I make almost everything I eat at home with fresh ingredients - and almost nothing I make is 'diet food'. I watch my portions. I track my calories. I exercise. I don't label foods as 'good' or 'bad'. I don't believe in deprivation or saying 'I will never eat THAT again in my life'. I refuse to diet... period. It doesn't work for me.

I think people need to respect differences and accept that what works for one person, might not work for another. 'Everything in Moderation' is working for me. I've lost 25 pounds in 3 months - easily and happily, with no hunger or cravings. Calling people who don't agree with you 'weak-minded' just seems rude. Your post just really rubbed me the wrong way.

UpEarly,

I think you have a very healthy approach to eating. A lot of what you posted is similar to the point I was trying to make.

weightofyourskin

"Eat everything in moderation" is a weak-minded person's way of saying "it's ok if I eat alot of high trans fat food, sweets, sodas and all the other crap processed food as long as I don't eat alot of it"

You realize that makes absolutely no sense, right? If you eat something in moderation you are, by definition, not eating a lot of it.

comforter

Hi! I have a similar struggle, and I call it "walking the tiger" every day because each day I have to take my appetite out of its cage, feed it, then put it back in there. I know how brutal a struggle it can be...I am a food addict too, and as helpless as any crack addict on the street. After a 40+ year struggle (I am 56) I have learned that there are several things I just cannot have because they send me to hell almost immediately - those are sugar, wheat and caffeine and some specific trigger foods as well. When I eat them it sets up craving which is so out of control its crazy, and it affects me not only physically, but emotionally and spiritually as well. I cannot eat these things in moderation, and if I think I can, I am in big time denial. (I have gone the denial route several hundred times also!)

So after trying to do the right thing for what feels like 100 times, I feel this time I have hope....It is easier to stay on the wagon than it is to fall off and get back on, so I am now committed to staying on the wagon for life and have lost probably close to 50 pounds. I have 85 more to go. So if you struggle (and we all will) it's ok - the important thing is to never give up and keep discsussing the feelings about it. I am convinced it is the only way to get, and stay, well. Hang in there! Blessings to you!!!

lloydrt

thank you OP for this sincere post...........I enjoy reading other peoples posts and replies and use this knowledge/experiences to keep me focused

knowing Im not the only helps, reading others hints and tips on weight loss is priceless.........its helped me

'thank you again for a sincere, from the heart post, we ALL can relate, cuz were all in the same boat..........Lloyd

BeeElMarvin

Do what you have to do. Eat the way you need to. Rant and vent if it makes you feel better. Everybody is different. If eating in moderation doesn't work for you - it does for many so I wouldn't call it a "b__lsh_t term" - then do what you must to succeed. Nobody is trying to tell you that you MUST do anything, they are for the most part purely suggestions (with the occasional overly zealous comment thrown in for good measure).

SwtKittN

Because if it tasts good. I will eat it even tho i am not hungry. But because its there.

I TOTALLY agree with this. And it pisses me off all the time my sister comes around she's leaving chips and candy everywhere all over the house. And she KNOWS we're all trying to diet. She's overweight herself too, not that I have any right to tell her that because I'm so far over what she is tho haha. I find when I only eat when I FEEL hungry I eat a lot less. But seeing things like pringles and candybars just sitting around remind me of them and make me want them even tho I'm not hungry for them Mountain Dew I'm totally obsessed with and there's a 6 pack (5 now I drank one the day I brought them home) and it's been there for afew days. I want it just because I see it and it's there. I need someone to take it and hide it so I stop thinking about it, it won't work if I hide it myself I don't have good self control

joejccva71

Removed because it's not worth the arguement..

daniran

You are definately not alone..... But, you can beat this - I think. You can learn some tricks to win by. for instance, before you eat something you really like (that's probably loaded with calories) - eat some fruit and/or veggies until you are almost full. Then have that thing that you just can't say no too. You'll eat less of it and you'll be getting healthy nutrition from the change in eating habits. Eventually, you may not want it so much and start to like eating all those fruits and vegetables.

LaJauna

"In my opinion, food addicts are comparable to any other type of drug addict- except, the sucky thing is that food food addicts- cant live without food- drug addicts can live without drugs. It's a hard situation: I have to face my addiction everyday (just like every other addict), but meanwhile, I still have to consume my addiction. You don't tell a crack head "Oh, just a little bit of crack in moderation."-- then why tell a food addict "oh, just a little bit of everything in moderation."

I have found that you are right. But like other addictions there are special triggers with food addictions...sugars, starchy foods of all sorts, gluten foods. If you can eliminate those foods then you can stop the roller coaster of food addiction. Start by eating only fresh food. Fresh meats, veggies, real fats (not those man-made grease bowls) and start to let your body heal itself. All addicts have to wake up every day and make healthy choices. An alcoholic still needs to drink, they abstain from all alcohol and they choose non-alcoholic beverages. A drug addict still may need medication, they choose to let their health professionals and maybe a support group help them make healthy choices or to abstain completely. A food addict must recognize their particular poison. Mine is sugars, starches and junk food of any sort. I can't be around it without a plan to have something healthy in place to eat. You can do this. You aren't alone. There are many of us on these boards who are in "recovery" from our food addictions. Join us in sobriety. I attend a Celebrate Recovery group and we always end our meetings with, "Keep coming back, it works if you work it, so work it because your worth it!" Keep coming back here and receiving the help you need to be successful. Bless you.