really bothered by this comment

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jcannon15
jcannon15 Posts: 148
in Health and Weight Loss
so i'm sitting at the desk talking with a female co worker about our fitness routines...cardio, weights, ect and she told me when i told her how much i lift that women should not have muscle tone, she thinks its disgusting. In her mind women should be soft, thin and doughy. She then went on to tell me to lighten up on my weights or pretty soon i'd be looking more masculine then i already do!!! I'm so mad by this comment.
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  • SallieBeige
    SallieBeige Posts: 341 Member
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    Don't be mad!
    Be flattered!!!
    I think she notices your toned shape :)

    Just because she says it, doesn't make her right.
    You are the one thats developing a healthy functional body that will serve you well.

    Well done!!!
    I, for one, am greeeeeen with envy!!!!
  • cammers74
    cammers74 Posts: 45
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    People who make unhelpful comments like this, are mostly just jealous! I bet she is envious of your figure and your muscle tone....! Ignore her and carry on as you please, its not her you're trying to impress! :)
  • lmanzi219
    lmanzi219 Posts: 32 Member
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    I think muscles are sexy, and because of our hormones as women, its nearly impossible to "bulk up" so keep on lifting! That may be her opinion but it doesn't make it right. It is also healthy to have muscles tone and I for one think they are sexy!!! Don't let her get you down, you're doing great and I'm sure you look fantastic!
  • MrsM1ggins
    MrsM1ggins Posts: 724 Member
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    she sounds like a complete moron to me. Why worry about the opinion of a complete moron?

    Don't forget: "never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience"
  • stephanielynn76
    stephanielynn76 Posts: 709 Member
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    so i'm sitting at the desk talking with a female co worker about our fitness routines...cardio, weights, ect and she told me when i told her how much i lift that women should not have muscle tone, she thinks its disgusting. In her mind women should be soft, thin and doughy. She then went on to tell me to lighten up on my weights or pretty soon i'd be looking more masculine then i already do!!! I'm so mad by this comment.

    Girl, forget her. What does her opinion matter anyway? The only thing that matters is how YOU feel about yourself. Does she think women should be "soft, thin and doughy" because that's how SHE is? I'm a muscle-y girl myself and I've been called a lot of things but masculine is not one of them!
  • emmaddy
    emmaddy Posts: 7
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    Oooh. Jealous much! Be flattered!!
  • H_Factor
    H_Factor Posts: 1,722 Member
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    that is horse**** and I wouldn't spend any more time being bothered by it. First of all, it is very difficult for women to "bulk up" because women generally don't have enough testosterone to "bulk up". Most women who work out build sleek, sexy muscle tone that is completely feminine. Second, even if it was possible to "bulk up" and become non-feminine, this doesn't happen overnight (even if you are using steroids, it doesn't happen overnight...and you're not using steroids). Sooooo, if you reach a point in your exercise program where you're adding more sleek muscle than you want...well, that's the time that you can take a break from resistance training and focus instead on cardio.

    Finally, even though I am a guy, I have found the bodyrock folks to have some of the best interval training workouts available. This lady works hard and the results show. I'm sure she's put in a LOT of work-outs (and good nutrition) into building the body she has, but I think she is totally feminine despite the sleek muscle. I'm including a link to a video of who I am talking about.

    http://www.bodyrock.tv/2011/07/25/booty-meets-abs-workout/
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    if she thinks 'soft' and 'doughy' are nice things to be then fine, leave her to it, each to their own. to me soft and doughy are not compliments, who wants to look like a loaf of bread?!
  • H_Factor
    H_Factor Posts: 1,722 Member
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    so i'm sitting at the desk talking with a female co worker about our fitness routines...cardio, weights, ect and she told me when i told her how much i lift that women should not have muscle tone, she thinks its disgusting. In her mind women should be soft, thin and doughy. She then went on to tell me to lighten up on my weights or pretty soon i'd be looking more masculine then i already do!!! I'm so mad by this comment.

    Girl, forget her. What does her opinion matter anyway? The only thing that matters is how YOU feel about yourself. Does she think women should be "soft, thin and doughy" because that's how SHE is? I'm a muscle-y girl myself and I've been called a lot of things but masculine is not one of them!

    stephanielynn is a perfect, real life, MFP example of a sleek, feminine looking woman. if you want to aim for sleek and toned, keep doing the resistance training. if you prefer soft and doughy, then stop the resistance training. Aim for the vision you have of yourself....and if that vision is sleek and toned, don't fear building bulky muscle because its not going to happen (without steroids).
  • redandblackswan
    redandblackswan Posts: 5
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    Why on earth do you care what she thinks?? It may well be her own opnion but does it matter?? all that matters is how you feel, my worry is that she has hit a nerve, the fact she makes you so angry says more about how you are feeling, do you feel muscles are as she says in your heart of hearts or not?? If you don't then brush it off as someone ignorant that knows nothing about what you want, but if you do worry about the muscular gain, then why not speak to a fitness coach and get them to put you on the right programme for you. Whatever the reason behind it, don't ever let other peoples negative opinions get to you, what do they know? they don't live in your body!!
  • unsuspectingfish
    unsuspectingfish Posts: 1,176 Member
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    I, for one, find muscular women far more attractive. Furthermore, it's what I want for MYSELF, which is really the only opinion that matters to me. Like everyone else, I think she's just jealous.
  • Selin4
    Selin4 Posts: 15
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    I'd be more pissed off if she called me soft and doughy to be honest :)
  • BeccyBerry
    BeccyBerry Posts: 312
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    Saw this on a blog I was just reading

    cEmb0.png

    Dont let it bother you, take it as a compliment that your hard work is paying off xx
  • capricorn144
    capricorn144 Posts: 335 Member
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    "Just smile and wave, boys...Just smile and wave" the penguins from Madagascar.
    :bigsmile:

    Do your plan and give that opinion the attention it really deserves DELETE! :happy:
  • Jeneba
    Jeneba Posts: 699 Member
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    Objectively, we know she is full of "spit." I think what really bothers me is the snide, deliberate way she tried to humiliate you. WATCH YOUR BACK!!!
  • jcannon15
    jcannon15 Posts: 148
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    after thinking about it and reading all your responses i can't wait to go home and lift extra heavy lol she's just jealous she's not as cute as me and not as strong as me haha
  • MissTomGettingThin
    MissTomGettingThin Posts: 776 Member
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    I reckon she just doesn't know any better.
  • SarahLovesCheesecake
    SarahLovesCheesecake Posts: 520
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    Sounds like jealousy hun, you carry on. Yes you can over do it, but a toned female is hot!
  • H_Factor
    H_Factor Posts: 1,722 Member
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    after thinking about it and reading all your responses i can't wait to go home and lift extra heavy lol she's just jealous she's not as cute as me and not as strong as me haha

    LIKE!!! that's the spirit!
  • Delicate
    Delicate Posts: 625 Member
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    Rock on Sista!

    Ignore her, its your body, create a good looking functional body!

    She just wants complements and she is doing that by trying to put her down, you could always say something like 'all my weight and resistance training makes me able to carry alot of shopping' or that your arms will look alot better in strappy tops and shoulders in strapless tops.

    Nothings better than a sexki pair of shoulders in strapless

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