why do exes look you up?

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2

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  • taso42_DELETED
    taso42_DELETED Posts: 3,394 Member
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    And also, he wanted to see if you have the nice non-stick frying pan. He's been looking everywhere for it. You must have it?
  • 27strange
    27strange Posts: 837 Member
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    Facebook makes it so easy to "check up" on past friends and significant others. I think a lot of people just have a curiosity from time to time of what their exes are up to, what's changed, how successful they have or haven't been, etc. Its not necessarily a bad, stalking sort of scenario, but sometimes that does happen too. I think from time to time we are all curious about people we were close to years ago and what they have made out of their lives...whether this be exes, old schoolyard friends, neighbors, etc.
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    And also, he wanted to see if you have the nice non-stick frying pan. He's been looking everywhere for it. You must have it?

    actually it was a steering wheel for the xbox, but that thing is so out of date now haha and he already asked for it, and so did the girl he cheated on me with, she texted me he wants his stearing wheal back, I told her I don't know what that is, but he sure did a good job trading up hahaha
  • Mixmode
    Mixmode Posts: 332
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    Men are curious so they wanna know how you are currently doing as well as seeing pics of how you are currently looking. And yes, if you are doing better or worse than before your split. They also like to fantasize. Especially about what they once had. Also yes, of course they also don't remember the split being as bad as you do.
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
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    :grumble: Oh God...the stories I could tell....
  • Trixtabella
    Trixtabella Posts: 471 Member
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    My stalker ex boyfriend found me on facebook and poked me the other day I have now blocked him. Some people are just not right in the head.
  • shiggyshane
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    if the brake up was nasty then just dont except the request and keep it moving i mean why dwell on it longer the a minute
    if you know you really dont want to even speak to the person..
  • jamk1446
    jamk1446 Posts: 5,577 Member
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    I've had an ex look me up and I've had a couple of exes I've looked up. Speaking for myself, I just wanted to see how someone who used to be a significant part of my life has been doing. Even though we broke up because we weren't compatible as a couple and needed to go our separate ways, I still care. I'm not looking for more anything more than just to say hi and touch base. And the internet has made us able to interact in ways that previous generations couldn't and didn't, maybe for the better, maybe not.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    Not a thing I have had to deal with but guessing several reasons.

    Perhaps to see if you found someone else and how he/she compares so maybe an ego thing.
    They are a miserable person.
    To keep a foot in the door "just in case".
  • luscadero
    luscadero Posts: 92 Member
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    My ex-boyfriend from high school not only friended, but then showed up unexpectedly at a show my band was playing... WHICH I AM IN WITH MY HUSBAND. Not only that, but he's also married and drove 8 hours to do this. Dumbass. He clearly wanted to hook up, according to my husband. WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT'S OK!? GAH!

    My other ex, from just after high school, is friends with a couple of my childhood friends, and has tried to get in touch several times. I still see comments he has left about me on other people's profiles. WTF is wrong with people!? It's been 10 years, he needs to move on.

    Honestly, people scare the crap outta me.
  • sweebum
    sweebum Posts: 1,060 Member
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    Build a second profile. Stock it with whips, chains and pictures of a mansion. let them friend that.

    What a great idea!
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
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    Not a thing I have had to deal with but guessing several reasons.

    Perhaps to see if you found someone else and how he/she compares so maybe an ego thing.
    They are a miserable person.
    To keep a foot in the door "just in case".

    Wow Carl...you hit the nail on the head...

    That sums up any reason I have had to deal with exes in the past several years.
  • 123456654321
    123456654321 Posts: 1,311 Member
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    Curiosity I suppose.
  • taso42_DELETED
    taso42_DELETED Posts: 3,394 Member
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    Not a thing I have had to deal with but guessing several reasons.

    Perhaps to see if you found someone else and how he/she compares so maybe an ego thing.
    They are a miserable person.
    To keep a foot in the door "just in case".

    Wow Carl...you hit the nail on the head...

    That sums up any reason I have had to deal with exes in the past several years.

    Wow, sounds like most people have broken up on really bad terms. That's too bad. Well if that is the case, then yes, I suppose it would be a bit weird to get a friend request from them.

    I have people who are not my exes who I would rather not have anything to do with ever again, but oddly enough, I think I'm friends with all my exes. Maybe it's because they're really cool, and I'm really cool :smokin:
  • Mkleder
    Mkleder Posts: 289
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    Forget Facebook, my old, circa 1980's, boyfriend has continuously tried to contact me, via mail to my mom's house, for the past decade. He's totally whacked out and his letters -- seemingly handwritten in crayon -- look like the threat/ransom notes you see on TV police dramas.

    My ex husband tracked me down online and spent a few years contacting me every 6 months or so under the story that he wanted to "make things right with the people he hurt in the past." But, in the context of our marriage ending because 1) he was a liar and a cheat and 2) he had an annoying habit of "collecting" old girlfriends and staying in contact with them, I told him to get lost using some choice words I never use at any other time.

    Both royal losers.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I'm not truly friends with any of mine. If I saw them somewhere, I'd definitely say hello and make small talk. And if I lived within easy traveling distance of one of them in particular, I really could see myself being friends with him and his wife. They are good people.

    But other than that, there's just too much water under the bridge. When someone dumps me, says "let's be friends," and I'm stupid enough to go along with it, only to have the guy totally disappear from my life two weeks later, it kind of ruins any chance that we're ever going to be "real" friends. It's one thing to do that when you're a kid and you don't really know how to handle a break-up, but it's entirely another to do it as an adult with someone who was your best friend for years. There's just no coming back from that.
  • CakeFit21
    CakeFit21 Posts: 2,521 Member
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    I have exes I'm friends with and exes I'm not. I assume they have all looked me up because I have looked them up.

    I just spoke to one the other day and I made plans to meet him, (and introduce him to my husband) while I'm in New York in the fall. We will always be friends.

    When you spend a significant amount of time with a person, is it not natural to wonder how they are doing?

    Plus, I think the, "just in case" thing is always a factor.
  • dayzeerock
    dayzeerock Posts: 918 Member
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    I'm friends with all my exes...in real life and on FB...guess I never saw this as "weird" or a bad thing...
  • audigal2008
    audigal2008 Posts: 1,129 Member
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    Facebook makes it so easy to "check up" on past friends and significant others. I think a lot of people just have a curiosity from time to time of what their exes are up to, what's changed, how successful they have or haven't been, etc. Its not necessarily a bad, stalking sort of scenario, but sometimes that does happen too. I think from time to time we are all curious about people we were close to years ago and what they have made out of their lives...whether this be exes, old schoolyard friends, neighbors, etc.
    I do have a stalker, he makes up fake profiles to try to get me to add him on FB. I never dated him but he tried. As soon as I stopped talking to him (be4 I knew he was this type) He "took up" with my twin! Havent seen them since! He still stalks me! Shes non too bright! They didnt work out! So yes I guess some ppl are just creeps!
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
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    i only have 2 exes. One left me for another girl, but i was moving anyways so i didn't feel too bad. We are friends on Facebook, and i have always thought of him as an amazing guy (we just aren't meant to date).

    my OTHER ex and i had a HORRIBLE breakup. I tried to be friends with him afterward because the way he acts with friends is cool, but behind closed doors he is a LOT different...didn't work. We were friends for a while, and he deleted me. Maybe in a few years when we have both moved on i would be happy to be friends again since i know he is a good person inside.

    :)