Fidelity Part Deux...

kapeluza

My grandparents were, 61 years of marriage. Brave souls!

LorinaLynn

It took me about 27 years to find ONE guy I wanted to be with. I can't be bothered to try to find another. :laugh:

I'm all for monogamy. Love it. Love being married.

But if I had to be monogamous with the first guy I ever hooked up with, I'd have thrown myself off the Empire State Building.

_beachgirl_

Some animals are monogamous but most animals are not. And being as humans are animals we are not 'meant' to do anything and have socially many times in many lands changed our beliefs on the social norms of monogamy.

Best answer, but then again you always have the best answers.

_eislek_

Do you think men and women are meant to be monogamously committed until death?

Please support your position in a grammatically correct five paragraph essay.... or not.

speaking scientifically, humans as "animals" are not meant to be monogomous..men are here to spread the seed and women are here to nest...that's strickly scientifically speaking. But there's exception to every rule.

This.

gr8grl68

I absolutely believe we are supposed to be monogomous . . . if you find the right person. I didn't find the right person first time, but am now very happily married to the person I will live the rest of my life with.

BrownEyedG1rl

The way my life has been going...heck no!!!! I agree with the previous posted "scientific" reason.

But I'm a bit jaded now. :grumble:

AliDarling

i married my husband for life. if you're not willing to make that strong of a commitment, perhaps you shouldn't get married

Don't judge me with that tone of voice.

it wasnt judgemental, it was an opinion. you asked us for our opinions. if you dont want to be commited, stay single. i'm not damning you in any way. but if you think i did, and think that others are judging you, you shouldnt put up such a debatable topic. i married for life. thats my choice, if you dont want to spend the rest of your life with one person, its yours. none of my concern

Also, there is no tone of voice. i'm writing, not speaking.

PlanetVelma

i think as a species....No. it's a cultural belief and for some it's a religious belief (or non belief). my husband and i have had many conversations about monogamy and it's challenges along with our natural tendencies (i feel) to not be in only one consistent relationship (sexual) for life. it's about choices. i choose to be monogamous, my husband does, but we can both admit to it being a challenge at times. marriage and relationships are constant works in progress.

Perfect answer!

voluptas63

I think it's pretty much up to the person. I can be monogomous and I can be philanderous. I prefer, especially in this day and age, to be monogomous. Doesn't mean I haven't dabbled in the latter.

My Dad on the other hand... yikes. He's a cheater cheater forever. He cheated on my Mom, cheated on his next wife and currently has a married girlfriend. Some people just aren't made to be monogomous for whatever reason.

bigdawg025

I believe this is something that could be debated for a long long time. Although I'm not against the idea of marriage... I do believe it's a rather outdated entity, and that it is most highly beneficial to women.

If you look at the divorce process... men ALMOST always get the shaft regardless of the situation/reason for the divorce... even when the woman is cheating!!! The woman gets the kids and the house... 50% of his pay... etc. etc. etc. In this day and age this should not be happening considering the propensity for BOTH people to have fruitful careers and money earning potential. The books need to be re-written from those of 1950 and prior.

As far as being predisposed to being monogamous... I don't believe people were "meant" to be monogamous. I believe it's society's way of controlling the masses, making sure children are taken care of, and fulfilling religious beliefs that are ancient by definition.

ohwhataday

Well then... No. Humans definitely have to make a concentrated effort to be monogamous hahahaha

this is true.......................................hummmmmmm this is a good question. :devil:

I'm beginning to think you are a little bit of a player.. hmmmmmmm.

maab_connor

Are we "wired" for monogamy? No. Are we capable of it? Yes. Does that mean it is for everyone? No.

When you enter into a relationship, be sure you are both satisfied and happy with your arrangement, whatever that may be. Your expectations should be clear from the start, and should they change during the course of the relationship, the best policy is honesty and open communication.

THIS!

i am the serial monogamist, i know this. i get bored quickly, but i don't cheat. and i've tried open relationships, but i find that i am not happy in them. so one at a time. until i get bored. then i move on.

but i was just a groomsman (groomsman with boobs) for one of my best friends - he and his wife have been together for 10 years and have always had an open relationship. they do best as a couple when they have a girlfriend. but they both knew this going in and they are a very strong partnership for it.

i think that the rules of what is sexually acceptable for a partnership is as individual as the ppl in those partnerships. you have to communicate your wants and your desires to your partner and find some way for you both to be happy and satisfied. i don't think that there should be "rules" for it.

kennethmgreen

monogamy != 'not cheating'
monogamy != marriage
'meant to be' != 'making a choice'

Just sayin..

odusgolp

Kenneth, I think I'm hashtag confused *LOL*

And speak for yourself Corn I'm totally perfect

ZebraHead

♪♪When the walls come tumblin' down♪♪
♪♪When the walls coming crumblin' crumblin'♪♪
♪♪When the walls come tumblin' tumblin' down♪♪


Single mama in a trailer park - so sad... :sad:

voluptas63

Kenneth, I think I'm hashtag confused *LOL*

And speak for yourself Corn I'm totally perfect

All my bits are perfect. Even my cottage cheese.

odusgolp

♪♪When the walls come tumblin' down♪♪
♪♪When the walls coming crumblin' crumblin'♪♪
♪♪When the walls come tumblin' tumblin' down♪♪


Single mama in a trailer park - so sad... :sad:

*snicker*

rml_16

i married my husband for life. if you're not willing to make that strong of a commitment, perhaps you shouldn't get married

Don't judge me with that tone of voice.

it wasnt judgemental, it was an opinion. you asked us for our opinions. if you dont want to be commited, stay single. i'm not damning you in any way. but if you think i did, and think that others are judging you, you shouldnt put up such a debatable topic. i married for life. thats my choice, if you dont want to spend the rest of your life with one person, its yours. none of my concern

Also, there is no tone of voice. i'm writing, not speaking.

But she asked a different question than the one you answered.

Just sayin'.

TommyWR

i think as a species....No. it's a cultural belief and for some it's a religious belief (or non belief). my husband and i have had many conversations about monogamy and it's challenges along with our natural tendencies (i feel) to not be in only one consistent relationship (sexual) for life. it's about choices. i choose to be monogamous, my husband does, but we can both admit to it being a challenge at times. marriage and relationships are constant works in progress.

I really wish we could bump knuckles right now.

Would that mean you were stll monogamous? :laugh: :laugh:

odusgolp

i think as a species....No. it's a cultural belief and for some it's a religious belief (or non belief). my husband and i have had many conversations about monogamy and it's challenges along with our natural tendencies (i feel) to not be in only one consistent relationship (sexual) for life. it's about choices. i choose to be monogamous, my husband does, but we can both admit to it being a challenge at times. marriage and relationships are constant works in progress.

I really wish we could bump knuckles right now.

Would that mean you were stll monogamous? :laugh: :laugh:

That depends on your definition of monogamy... Or maybe there is something about it in Leviticus... hrmmmm

:drinker:

Ajontheguitar

I agree that it can be a challenge based on our urges. However, we are capable of it. That's why I also don't agree that since animals aren't, and we are animals, we shouldn't be. Please understand my next sentence does NOT from a religious standpoint, merely a logic and science and standpoint:

We in many ways, aren't fully animals. If you look at the evolution chain, around 50 thousand years ago the evolution of our species took such a huge jump that evolution cannot fully explain. We're either the products of a God, a calculated genetic change by something sentient, or any explanation you'd like to believe, of which I am fine with. That said--we are not animals in that sense, we are different.

cmriverside

totally not registering a vote. . . . but having fun watching . . .

odusgolp

totally not registering a vote. . . . but having fun watching . . .

And you brought popcorn!!! Share??

fbmandy55

Some animals are monogamous but most animals are not. And being as humans are animals we are not 'meant' to do anything and have socially many times in many lands changed our beliefs on the social norms of monogamy.

Somewhat agree with this. If you are a person who is NOT meant to be monogamous, then make sure your partner is aware and ok with this. It's just plain crap to do it behind their back. There are plenty of couples who have happy "open" relationships.



I personally am all about monogamy if I am in a relationship with the same kind of person. Otherwise, as long as both parties are involved, I don't see a problem with it.

tashjs21

The concept of monogamy was created when life expectancy was 30 years - I'm just sayin'

Serial monogamy is where it's at now-a-days.

:laugh: When "til death do us part" wasn't so far off.


I agree with the poster that said it is a choice. Too many people choose the wrong partner and then when they are inevitably left unfulfilled, they start to stray. :huh:

And then yea, some men are just douches and some woman are just skanks.

odusgolp

I really don't understand the open relationship... to each their own, of course, I don't care what happens in other people's bedrooms... but i still don't get how that manages to work out over a 50+ year marriage.

rml_16

I really don't understand the open relationship... to each their own, of course, I don't care what happens in other people's bedrooms... but i still don't get how that manages to work out over a 50+ year marriage.

What gets me is the number of people in "open relationships" or even swingers who are people I wouldn't want to have sex with if you covered their faces with paper bags and wrapped us both in plastic.

TheRoadDog

I DO NOT believe that there is only one person out there. One perfect soulmate, etc. I believe in a certain amount of compatibility, but I think monogamy is a choice.

I CHOOSE the person I am with and I CHOOSE to be monagamous.

tashjs21

I'm not talking about choosing to... I mean meant to....

Like penguins. Penguins simply are. It's not really a "choice".

Then again, freaking Kowalski is dam* smart, I could be totally wrong.

Hmmm, in that case, probably not or there wouldn't be so many instances of cheating if we were predisposed towards monogamy.

odusgolp

I really don't understand the open relationship... to each their own, of course, I don't care what happens in other people's bedrooms... but i still don't get how that manages to work out over a 50+ year marriage.

What gets me is the number of people in "open relationships" or even swingers who are people I wouldn't want to have sex with if you covered their faces with paper bags and wrapped us both in plastic.

You are a kinky little minx aren't you