Why do people feel the need to be so RUDE?

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  • xSophia19
    xSophia19 Posts: 1,536 Member
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    I feel exactly the same way!! my eating habbits are terrible, i will scoff junk if i can and will drink loooads of alochol when i can!

    Buuuut whenever i log all the junk food in my diary or a write a status about the junk food im having, i get hate thrown at me, people comment all sorts of crap about it, people delete me because of it! soo i just cant blooody win!

    At the end of the day, i think its not what we eat, its how much of it we eat! and when we workout and burn lots of calories then thats even better! when people get arsy about it, i just let them get on with it =)
  • milaxx
    milaxx Posts: 1,122 Member
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    One thing I've learned not only about posting here, but on forums in general. If you are going to post you need to have a thick skin. Some people post to be supportive, some people post to be supportive but it comes out rude & others are just plain rude. Simply prepare yourself for all 3 whenever you post.
  • dipsl19
    dipsl19 Posts: 317 Member
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    i also find it HILARIOUS that people on here, a site to lose weight, are trying to act like they do everything right.

    when CLEARLY they havent been able to do everything completely healthy, or they wouldnt be here in the first place. cmonnnnn youre not fooling anyone, *****es.
  • ShrinkingNinja
    ShrinkingNinja Posts: 460 Member
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    I just went and read through your other thread, I was sorry to read some of the responses.

    There is trying to be truthful and helpful and then there is just being mean.

    Depression sucks, it is a long hard battle to fight. Best of luck to you.

    Where is the other thread?
  • NiciS72
    NiciS72 Posts: 1,043 Member
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    Sorry to hear the trolls came out and messed with you. I say ignore them and focus on the positive and constructive posts. There are a lot of ignorant people out there and unfortunately they feel justified in being mean to others when they know damn well they would never act like that in person. My motto is I TRY to only post things I'd say to anyone inperson. That way I can live with a clean conscience. I may think something is stupid, but most likely I'd never say that.

    That said, keep your chin up and keep up the good work! ;)
  • milaxx
    milaxx Posts: 1,122 Member
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    ....

    At the end of the day, i think its not what we eat, its how much of it we eat! and when we workout and burn lots of calories then thats even better! when people get arsy about it, i just let them get on with it =)

    Sadly that's not true.

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-dean-ornish/all-calories-are-not-the_b_172459.html

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/293097-not-all-calories-are-equal-says-harvard

    That said, my sister is the same way. Try eliminating the bad foods you eat one by one instead of all at once. The less processed foods you eat, the less your junk food cravings will be.
  • hpsnickers1
    hpsnickers1 Posts: 2,783 Member
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    That is when you click on "Report Post" and the moderators will step in. If you feel you have been attacked they will either warn the reply poster and will even ban them from the forum if they have to.

    And sometimes it's hard to judge if the poster was really trying to be mean when you aren't face to face. Sometimes, when online, honesty can come off as rudeness. I still have a tendency to takes things said "personally" but I am learning to develop a thick skin with those kind of people. And believe me, the Primal/Paleo lifestyle seems to get bashed more than any other diet

    And of course some people are so miserable with their own life it makes them feel better when they make someone else miserable. There are more supportive people on this site then there are non-supportive. Just let it slide right off you.
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
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    I just read that thread and made a couple of comments. In the past few weeks, there have been an influx of extremely rude people on MFP. It never used to be to this extent and I'm wondering if the more popular it gets, the more trolls come to post. Please try to ignore them, but I do understand that's hard.
  • lgwmab
    lgwmab Posts: 274 Member
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    I'm sorry someone was rude to you. We are all here to support each other in a positive manner. I've been around many rude people, and refuse to let them get me down. I have a friends, who has 175 pounds to loose,no big deal, I tried to explain to him an=bout being careful with how much you loose, and how you do it, it could come back at you. He's been eating chicken and salads, and barely exercising, and has lost 7 pounds. I don't let it bother me, I am still enjoying food, and life, and know my weight will stay off. You are doing great! feel free to friend me, and message me anythime you need to talk.
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    Honestly I would hate to go through life with such thin skin,who cares what somebody on an internet site says really.If someone told me "you are fat ugly and stupid and I hope you die" I wouldnt even bat an eye. If someone came up to me in person and said that I still would not care.Words only have the power we give them
  • AdAstra47
    AdAstra47 Posts: 823 Member
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    Right there with ya. Some people seem to think that the ability to be anonymous online gives them the right to be rude & obnoxious in ways that they never would in Real Life. Just remember, there are lots of people on here who *aren't* like that!

    If it helps at all, many of the rude people I have encountered are acting on a generous impulse. They have found what works for them, and they want to share that knowledge so that others can have the same success. Problem is, people are complex and people are different. What works for one person may not necessarily work for another. But people who think they have "THE ANSWER" forget that, and get really pushy about their particular worldview & philosophy. They may honestly think they are helping you, when what they're really doing is making you feel lousy about your choices or your inability to do things their way.

    Check out some of the "debates" between the Vegetarian / Vegan crowd and the Paleo / Primal crowd on here. Or, on second thought, if you're already depressed, don't! :wink: Both sides insist that they are right. And they're both correct. For SOME people. But some of the advocates refuse to believe that any other lifestyle besides the one they've chosen will work.

    So just take the advice & help that's offered, and forget the critics & close-minded, intolerant, negative people. Take a moment to feel sorry for them, then leave them behind.

    I hope you do find a group of supportive friends here. Include me if you like, I've fought depression before as well. Best of luck to you!
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    Honestly, when I read the OP of your other thread I thought "simple, put the alarm on the other side of the room and don't reset it. I wish I had time to get 6 hours of sleep much less 10 or 12, but my days are too full to lay around." Besides that, in your OP you yourself used the word "lazy" not "chronic depression." There is a difference, and you clarified that later, but no in the OP. Did you deserve rude responses, no, but at the same time I think that you are being a little sensitive too especially considering the lazy versus depression distiction is an important one in this case.

    To address that post, exercise and proper nutrition are important ways to combat depression and balance out the chemical make up in your brain. The exercise releases endorphins, which makes you happy. Proper nutrition helps your body work more efficiently. Everytime I think of my depression it reminds me of the line from one of the medication commercials "depression hurts" because it does, it makes your body hurt, it makes you exhausted, it makes it difficult to sleep, think, make good decisions. If you post on MFP "how do I sleep less" you're going to get responses like "just wake up." If you post "I am suffering from depression" chances are you're going to get responses like "talk to your doctor, find a therapist." My depression was cyclical, I was in therapy every 4 years from the time I was 8, I haven't been to or need a therapist in 8 years and I really credit my diet and activity levels with my happiness.
  • ShrinkingNinja
    ShrinkingNinja Posts: 460 Member
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    If this is about the post about not being able to breathe properly I took most of the comments to be many out of concern because breathing is important.... Granted some of them lack tact, but they cared enough to want you to go to the hospital.
  • espinozAgal
    espinozAgal Posts: 160 Member
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    I am also a pretty sensitive person who takes what people say to heart... so the solution is not to air very personnel issues on a message board. yes, we are here for encouragement and help for weight loss and fitness but we are all human and all so different so what may be appropriate to one person, may not be to another. Good luck on your struggles.
  • nygiantschick
    nygiantschick Posts: 289 Member
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    You can't carpet the world so just wear comfortable shoes....there are all kinds of people on this site. I would suggest that you just share those personal/serious issues with those people you have selected as friends rather than putting out a post to the masses because you NEVER know who will respond. Stay focused on your task, move past the people who you feel are rude and negative, and reach your goals....keep your sun shining, Honey.... :smile: :flowerforyou:
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
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    Because sometimes the right answer isn't coated in peaches and cream.

    There is a difference between giving someone positive criticism and being down-right nasty.
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
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    Haters gonna hate - it's true in life and it's true in the forums here. It's unfortunate, but you will have to find a way to ignore the asshats and focus on the comments that you get back that *are* positive and helpful. :smile:
  • PlanetVelma
    PlanetVelma Posts: 1,231 Member
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    Because sometimes the right answer isn't coated in peaches and cream.

    There is a difference between giving someone positive criticism and being down-right nasty.

    You can't control how people reply/post to your questions on the forums, the only thing you can control is YOUR reaction.

    Not only that, when you are reading a post on a forum, email, text message or IM, you cannot SEE emotion, many times there are misunderstandings because there is no emotion attached to an electronic message. Texting, forum postings and email are some of the WORST ways to communicate because you (or the other person you are TRYING to communicate) cannot convey (or see) emotion. Sure you can use the little smiley faces, but you still can't see the other person's body language, if they're making eye contact, if they're smiling/frowning/etc...
  • lind3400
    lind3400 Posts: 557 Member
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    Welcome to the real world, it ain't perfect and you cant try to make it that way
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    I found the post you're talking about and stuck up for ya. I don't suffer from depression personally, but my mother does and I know how hard it can be to fall asleep and have the energy to get up every morning. Some people just don't get it.

    I like how you stick up for her by being rude yourself isnt hypocrisy great

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