My boyfriend is annoying.
Replies
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YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin0 -
I always liked the idea of chocolate chunk cookies made from ex-lax myself. Non-fatal but he'll stay busy for a while.0
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Super glue his Johnson to his belly and then get him excited...
Sucks having to take a leak while standing on your head...0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin0 -
slip some alli in his drink
the runs, lol0 -
Rat Poison. No mess.
Oh, or you could pinch his dong and say "Its not THAT cold in here."
lol this is hilarious lol0 -
It's okay. I went to the kitchen and grabbed a spatula and beat him with it. It led to a spatula/back scratcher duel, but I won.
Oh ****. I'm doing this all wrong.
Only sometimes. I have threatened guys with a smack-they get that excited look in their eyes and then I qualify it with "not a happy-joy-joy smack.... A make-you-cry-and-want-your-mommy smack". There's a difference!0 -
You would be amazed the respect you get with a head butt. After you head butt some *kitten* ONE time, they will never f**k with you again - it is now my first response
hit him quick, hit him hard - right between the eyes and you don't have to say anything or ask for anything - They get it0 -
Buy a BFS!
Bigger Fu**ing Spatula!0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
In all criminal rings the highest risk is the transportation... do you want to drive around with a body in the trunk? didnt think so... so anti freeze it is so u can call ambulance about a half hour after he dies...
and if u do need to dispose of a body.... desert.. anyone find him they can trace him back to ya... instead feed him to the pigs.. pigs eat bone, teeth, everything.. so all u get is a pile of poop after..0 -
I had an ex who loved to poke me in my belly.0
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Well placed back fist and call it a "love tap".0
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YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
In all criminal rings the highest risk is the transportation... do you want to drive around with a body in the trunk? didnt think so... so anti freeze it is so u can call ambulance about a half hour after he dies...
and if u do need to dispose of a body.... desert.. anyone find him they can trace him back to ya... instead feed him to the pigs.. pigs eat bone, teeth, everything.. so all u get is a pile of poop after..
good point... i have a pick up beds are easily washed out.... and aren't javelinas similar to pigs? or is that a different thing... lots of javelinas and coyotes around the desert....0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
In all criminal rings the highest risk is the transportation... do you want to drive around with a body in the trunk? didnt think so... so anti freeze it is so u can call ambulance about a half hour after he dies...
and if u do need to dispose of a body.... desert.. anyone find him they can trace him back to ya... instead feed him to the pigs.. pigs eat bone, teeth, everything.. so all u get is a pile of poop after..
good point... i have a pick up beds are easily washed out.... and aren't javelinas similar to pigs? or is that a different thing... lots of javelinas and coyotes around the desert....
they leave the bones... all u need is couple human bones or teeth n ur f.u.c.k.e.d. lol
other thing she could have done.. is make a simple smoke bomb... toss it in the room he is in.. run in with a baseball bat.. hit him in the gut and knee caps couple times n throw the bat away.. then start yelling and screaming that someone broke in the house...
Recepie for smoke bomb:
-buy 2 instant cold packs(make sure they are the ones with pebbles and water bag that u need to pop; their most common ones)
-take luke warm water in a big bowl and pour the pebbles(ammodium nitrate) from the cold pack and mix water will turn ice cold
-take large sheet of news paper or phonebook paper works great and dip soak for about 10-15sec
-dry the sheet over a small flame, in low heat oven or sun(last option and least effective)
-fold couple times and roll into a small tube and put a small piece of tape to hold it in a tube
-light one end, blow the flame out, toss and run, it will smoke like crazy and wont light up unless you got the formula wrong..
works just like a military grade or store bought smoke granades.. GOOD LUCK!!0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
In all criminal rings the highest risk is the transportation... do you want to drive around with a body in the trunk? didnt think so... so anti freeze it is so u can call ambulance about a half hour after he dies...
and if u do need to dispose of a body.... desert.. anyone find him they can trace him back to ya... instead feed him to the pigs.. pigs eat bone, teeth, everything.. so all u get is a pile of poop after..
good point... i have a pick up beds are easily washed out.... and aren't javelinas similar to pigs? or is that a different thing... lots of javelinas and coyotes around the desert....
they leave the bones... all u need is couple human bones or teeth n ur f.u.c.k.e.d. lol
other thing she could have done.. is make a simple smoke bomb... toss it in the room he is in.. run in with a baseball bat.. hit him in the gut and knee caps couple times n throw the bat away.. then start yelling and screaming that someone broke in the house...
Recepie for smoke bomb:
-buy 2 instant cold packs(make sure they are the ones with pebbles and water bag that u need to pop; their most common ones)
-take luke warm water in a big bowl and pour the pebbles(ammodium nitrate) from the cold pack and mix water will turn ice cold
-take large sheet of news paper or phonebook paper works great and dip soak for about 10-15sec
-dry the sheet over a small flame, in low heat oven or sun(last option and least effective)
-fold couple times and roll into a small tube and put a small piece of tape to hold it in a tube
-light one end, blow the flame out, toss and run, it will smoke like crazy and wont light up unless you got the formula wrong..
works just like a military grade or store bought smoke granades.. GOOD LUCK!!
hmmm can you make an exwife disappear....... no she's not mine technically, but when you marry .... well you marry into them0 -
Wow, guys can be so dense. That is all.0
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Wow, guys can be so dense. That is all.
This is an understatement!0 -
Wow, guys can be so dense. That is all.
This is an understatement!0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
And I've got a really huge fire pit in my back yard...perfect for roastin marshmellows...and burnin 'rubbish'........0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
And I've got a really huge fire pit in my back yard...perfect for roastin marshmellows...and burnin 'rubbish'........
lol ull have neibourghs running over asking if they can have some of ur BBQ0 -
If anyone posts anything helpful, let me know. My husband says he likes my fluff and can't get why that's offensive:)0
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YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
And I've got a really huge fire pit in my back yard...perfect for roastin marshmellows...and burnin 'rubbish'........
lol ull have neibourghs running over asking if they can have some of ur BBQ
Lolol.....I would say "Why of course!!".....if the bones are in their trash....they're NOT in mine.........0 -
YOU GUYS!!!! Rat poison DOES make a mess. 1. He'll get bloody diarrhea, 2. He'll get bloody vomiting 3. You still have to dispose of the body!!!!
Every time he does something like this, remind him that "at some point tonight, you are going to go to sleep... and then you're mine." No specifics necessary, just change your name to Lorena Bobbit.
bodies are easily disposed of in the desert..... just sayin
And I've got a really huge fire pit in my back yard...perfect for roastin marshmellows...and burnin 'rubbish'........
lol ull have neibourghs running over asking if they can have some of ur BBQ
Lolol.....I would say "Why of course!!".....if the bones are in their trash....they're NOT in mine.........
lmao good one!!!0 -
I have found that a combination of acid and lye works really well for disposing of eveidance...first what you need to do is...oh wait never mind Im um just kidding ....really0
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When you are done losing the fat, have sex with his best friend then dump him.0
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