Deleting Friends....

TinaDay1114

I LOVE my friends, or, the ones that interact with me. I have a rule, if they don't log in for 'x' amount of time, without reason, I delete. If they do not interact with me, I delete. BUT, I only do it, because I like to get to know and genuinely be there for my friends. Just my opinion.

ME TOO. I like connecting one-on-one, not just "collecting."

NoAdditives

I don't delete people. You never know when they may be back and in need of support.

I just returned after being gone for three months. The first half of that time we were staying with my family, the second half we were living in a hotel. There was no good reason for me not to log in, I just didn't because there was a lot of craziness going on. I came back yesterday to find that one of my good friends had deleted me. She happily welcomed me back and is my friend once again, but it made me sad.

odusgolp

It takes about 7 days and I delete them. There are only a handful of people I actually know, like, and talk to... don't ask me why I hit the "accept" button so readily *LOL*

dandydalek

LOL, I JUST got done with my monthly friend-culling before I read this. I always feel bad doing it, but, for me, it needs to be done: if they don't log in for over a month, I chop them. I figure they can work on building their friends list back up when/if they come back. Now, I have one friend listed who hasn't logged on for over three months, but I just can't bring myself to chop him--I liked him too much when he was around. So, just do what you feel and don't feel bad. They can find new friends if they need them.

bry_all01

***I don't delete the ones that I interact with on a regular basis.***

Thomasm198

I don't delete people. You never know when they may be back and in need of support.

I just returned after being gone for three months. The first half of that time we were staying with my family, the second half we were living in a hotel. There was no good reason for me not to log in, I just didn't because there was a lot of craziness going on. I came back yesterday to find that one of my good friends had deleted me. She happily welcomed me back and is my friend once again, but it made me sad.

Same here.I don't delete people just because they haven't logged on in months. One of the people on my list hadn't logged on in nearly four months. I was still there when they decided to come back.

scott1024

If they are inactive, I give 'em about two weeks. If they are negative, and I tried to help but don't think they are breaking out of it, I'll give 'em a couple of days. I want to be surrounded by positive, supportive people. If they post a bunch of crap that has nothing to do with MFP and clog up the feed, I give 'em about 24 hours. Some are here solely for the social aspect or their attempt to entertain others. For me, that's what Facebook is for. My personal opinion, but I'd rather save the bandwidth for my friends who are supporting each other.

scott1024

If they are inactive, I give 'em about two weeks. If they are negative, and I tried to help but don't think they are breaking out of it, I'll give 'em a couple of days. I want to be surrounded by positive, supportive people. If they post a bunch of crap that has nothing to do with MFP and clog up the feed, I give 'em about 24 hours. Some are here solely for the social aspect or their attempt to entertain others. For me, that's what Facebook is for. My personal opinion, but I'd rather save the bandwidth for my friends who are supporting each other.

toddgaines

I actually just did a purge today. I delete anyone I haven't heard from in over 3 weeks, unless I know them personally, or they have told me why they have gone missing. I delete even if they are active but I just haven't heard or read anything from them. If they aren't helping me on my journey or at least providing entertainment, I typically don't need them on my list.

EMc4452

I delete all the time. But now Im feeling kinda bad about it. I guess I shouldnt care if they arent around...but for some reason I do. I like a small number of friends that I interact with on a regular basis. Im up in the air on this one.

Jennjenn1974

I usually delete people if they have been inactive for over 2 weeks(if I know they are away for whatever reason I leave it) , if I do not interacte with them on a regular basis or if it is painfully obvious they are not here for health/fitness reasons.

Shannon023

I'm gonna go contrarian on this one... if they're not logging in, who cares? It's not like they're clogging up the newsfeed.

That's me too.

Enforcer25

I would delete, the point of friends on here is to motivate you, leave comments, and help you. I wouldn't feel bad about deleting someone who hasn't commented or logged on in a certain amount of time.

kevinlynch3

I don't delete people. Several times I have been about to (because they haven't participated) and then BAM..they post something on my profile.

So because that's happened to me 2-3 times now, I give the benefit of the doubt now. Who knows, there are people who may get inspired by seeing what others do without directly participating in conversations/posts etc.

Contrary to the earlier poster who said this is not Facebook and they don't add people..well to each their own because it does help me to have a support network of friends to hold you accountable when you screw up or when you don't complete your diary like one of my pals did to me this morning.

lizziebeth1028

I LOVE my friends, or, the ones that interact with me. I have a rule, if they don't log in for 'x' amount of time, without reason, I delete. If they do not interact with me, I delete. BUT, I only do it, because I like to get to know and genuinely be there for my friends. Just my opinion.

I'm the same, if they don't log in for a certain amount of time or if I get the feel from their posts or lack of thereof that they are not serious.....I hit the delete button. I love my MFP friends and the interactions with them...it's makes this fitness journey easier but I don't want to amass a huge amount of friends just to have them. I'd rather keep a manageable group so we can interact and support each other.

Bankman1989

I give them an hour to log on..two if I'm feeling generous. i figure who needs sleep when you're trying to lose weight? lol Sure its a tough rule but no pain no gain!

I haven't "cut" anyone yet but this is only my 3rd week. I would say if they responded to you and now they are gone send them an email. Maybe they need encouraging. Then you can delete them. But if they were just a request with no interaction the get the blade out!

bry_all01

I give them an hour to log on..two if I'm feeling generous. i figure who needs sleep when you're trying to lose weight? lol Sure its a tough rule but no pain no gain!

I haven't "cut" anyone yet but this is only my 3rd week. I would say if they responded to you and now they are gone send them an email. Maybe they need encouraging. Then you can delete them. But if they were just a request with no interaction the get the blade out!

*ahem..... I have yet to see a comment on my wall or posts... do I smell a cut coming on?? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

outersoul

I do "cut a b*tch mondays" and weed out the non-participants once a week.

Love this. I give people a month. If you don't log in for a month, deuces.

lizziebeth1028

I do "cut a b*tch mondays" and weed out the non-participants once a week.

Love this. I give people a month. If you don't log in for a month, deuces.

Haha....cut a ***** Mondays, love it!!! Seriously....I don't really know anyone on this site on a personal level other than we have fitness goals in common. If you're not logging in.....then delete!!!

AngelsKisses75

To each his and her own. I have had a lot going on in my life, and only recently returned to MFP. I had a few people delete me, and well they can stay gone as far as I am concerned. *shrugs* I don't think I was dead weight. I mean did they need my seat for someone else? *giggle* Yeah no I don't delete people unless there is a reason beyond 'where have you been???' The people that have stuck around for my sporadic log ins, the ones that have cheered me on even when I was not able to log in, the ones that messaged me, and the ones that went above and beyond have truly made their place in my heart even bigger!

So this is one of those questions that only you can answer for yourself. Best of wishes to you and your MFP family. :flowerforyou:

sunshinethompson

I hang in there with all of my friends no matter the length of non-activity. I get messages in my inbox from some saying "how depressed they are" or "they have been really going through problems".

I keep them as friends to keep encouraging them so they know I'm pulling for them and as a friendly reminder of "what I do not want to happen to me"!

ladybug1620

As someone who was recently deleted by several people, I'm gonna go ahead and say that it's kind of hurtful. I at least make an attempt to reach out to people if they haven't been active before I delete them. If that's been done and there's still no response, then by all means I would delete. I did my best to check in to let people know why I was absent. Then I had a death in the family and didn't check in for a week or two and was deleted by some. None of them ever bothered to check on me before deleting, which I found pretty sad. To me this is all about support, which you can't do if you don't bother to check on your "friends." It's about effort on both parts IMO.

MsFitnFabulous

I don't delete people. You never know when they may be back and in need of support.

I just returned after being gone for three months. The first half of that time we were staying with my family, the second half we were living in a hotel. There was no good reason for me not to log in, I just didn't because there was a lot of craziness going on. I came back yesterday to find that one of my good friends had deleted me. She happily welcomed me back and is my friend once again, but it made me sad.

I was afraid to delete people for the longest time. Then it occurred to me that they obviously don't care and/or aren't committed. So do what you feel comfortable with but know.......some just don't log for no good reason.


If you aren't helping me, you're hurting me. And if I gotta choose between you & me, trust it ain't goin' be you!

ChellieIrish

I've been on both sides of this I was absent on and off for about 3 months due to the stress of exams and moving house :blushing: Yes I lost a few friends but IMO if that is the way they want it to be then fine :laugh: I did post once a week letting people know I was still alive but had a lot going on that didn't seem to matter :grumble: The friends who stayed with me are IMO golden they got me to this point with all their support and I hope I did them justice in return

Once I got back I posted on a few peoples walls who I had posted on previously to see if they were still around or if they had their own issues in RL but when I saw blank walls I hit the delete button (this was only after 4 months)

I used to add friends all the time but now I don't accept anyone unless they add a message I kinda agree that some people treat it like Facebook lol I have one of those and really don't need another one :laugh: I'm here for a reason to get fit and healthy and to live longer and really want to interact with like minded people :flowerforyou:

Another reason I did a clean up and deleted some people tho is even after chatting with some they still continued to eat only 600 - 800 cals per day and worked out :noway: I read everyones diary and really hated seeing those entries I couldn't keep saying "some nice choices but maybe add a few more cals" etc ... I'm here to learn a healthy routine that is not something I agreed with :blushing:

candykay89

The last time i checked my sister hadnt logged in for over 2 months, lol. Do i delete her? I do not think i have the guts to do it! Someone else may not have been that lucky!