When did you know it was love?

ApproachingDusk

To me, you can fall in love with someone and still not give your whole heart to them.

I realized that I was in love with my man when I just could not NOT tell him I loved him. It is the most terrifying and freeing feeling at the same time. I had loved him before we were dating, while we were friends, but I wasn't in love with him. It got to the point where it just slipped out and yet I meant it with my whole heart that I do love him.

It was never an "ah ha!" moment, but more of just thats the way it is. Take it or leave it.

Luckily he took it.

I agree with Maryd523, its not always the woman who gets attached. Hubs was waaayyyy more attached than I was in the beginning. I was terrified to start the relationship, but he was already a goner and in his mind it was a done deal. Stubborn man!

suzycreamcheese

after a couple of weeks i felt it.
Still going strong 6 years later

bloomsbox

for me it was when i started to think of him more often, i couldnt get him out of my mind, i wanted to be with him more, we had the best times together I knew i was in love then. I still love him with all my heart and always will

lucythinmint

Honestly....this is my TMI answer.



He insisted that I pass gas in front of him and then he took it like a man. Even got a laugh out of it. That was it. The tomboy in me fell head over heals :laugh:

oh yeah, he did do all that mushy stuff too but it just wasn't the same.....:D

leopardlushh

I must say, I am a cynic as well. I believe love is an evolutionary adaption to help couples succeed at raising a baby together. Caveman stuff. You fall in love, and then you are blind to all their faults, because you need them. And if you couldn't ignore the bad stuff, you would break up and then have less of a chance of raising a healthy baby.

I don't think humans are meant to be monogamous to one person their entire lives...and divorce rates support this. I do think it's possible, and very desirable, but I just don't think it's really in our makeup. Serial monagamy is more in line with our nature. It takes a lot of work to keep a relationship happy and healthy for a lifetime. At least that's what I hear.

I couldn't agree more. It's true...we all look at other people. It's in our instinct. DON'T start going off on me...I'm not saying it's right...just it's in our nature to lust over others. I think it's actually gross after awhile...I see sooo many guys at my work check out girls all day or customers checking out girls when there w/their spouses!!! (i know women do it too...were just a better at it tho)

(i.e. guy=:noway: girl=:blushing: )

Anyways I'm also one of the few people at my work that hasn't cheated on their spouse or loved one...also gross and sad.

I love my boyfriend to much. And I knew within a few months of our friendship that we were meant for each other...just celebrated 7 years! There are times when I could do without him for a moment but our little spats could never outweigh our genuine affection.

shauna121211

I think I'm falling out of it actually.

=[

Awe noo =[

Hope it all works out for the best

Me too.
I'm trying my hardest. I usually end relationship by now, but for him I'm fighting.

Not to be a cynic, but you are thinking about the wrong person here. I did the same thing with my ex-boyfriend... towards the end, I still loved him but I wasn't in love with him anymore... we had been together for 4 years and I was afraid to end it for him and for fear of being single. To this day, I resent those last 6 months or so because I just wasn't happy. It wasn't fair to me and it wasn't fair to him for leading him on for that whole time. You shouldn't have to try so hard in a relationship. I know you didn't ask for advise, but I thought I would share my similar experience with you. I hope you find a place with or without him where you can be as happy as possible.


As for the love topic... I've been with my current boyfriend for about 8 months now. In the beginning, I didn't really think it would go anywhere, but it developed into a really great relationship. We haven't said the L word yet, but I'm starting to think I may be in love with him... I'm head over heals and whenever I'm with him I still get butterflies in my tummy and I feel like I can completely be myself. We're both pretty nerdy and it's always heaps of fun when I'm with him. He pretty much treats me like a princess and the ways that he is with me makes me think he might love me too. Maybe the first "I love you" will pop up soon!

shauna121211

I'm still unsure with my guy, mostly because I second guess myself. Sometimes when we're hanging out, him playing SC2 or whatever and me doing school work or something on my laptop, I'll have this urge to tell him I love him because I'm just so extremely content and happy at that point in time. But that's not all "love" is, right? Even if I do actually love him, I rather him say it first (and mean it!) ;x We've been together for almost a year and haven't thrown out the L word because he's not one to vocalize his feelings. I'm okay with that for the most part, but sometimes it drives me insane xD I've told him this of course that I like to know if he's happy/angry/frustrated etc. with the relationship, but Rome wasn't built in a day. Overall I'm happy and feel that words aren't needed 95% of the time.

Totally in the same situation... I'm not going to cave and say it first! But like you said, I don't need to hear it to know that we're happy together.

Misiaxcore

I see sooo many guys at my work check out girls all day or customers checking out girls when there w/their spouses!!! (i know women do it too...were just a better at it tho)

(i.e. guy=:noway: girl=:blushing: )

Anyways I'm also one of the few people at my work that hasn't cheated on their spouse or loved one...also gross and sad.

I love my boyfriend to much. And I knew within a few months of our friendship that we were meant for each other...just celebrated 7 years! There are times when I could do without him for a moment but our little spats could never outweigh our genuine affection.

LOL so true with those emoticons. Congrats on the 7 years !

leopardlushh

I see sooo many guys at my work check out girls all day or customers checking out girls when there w/their spouses!!! (i know women do it too...were just a better at it tho)

(i.e. guy=:noway: girl=:blushing: )

Anyways I'm also one of the few people at my work that hasn't cheated on their spouse or loved one...also gross and sad.

I love my boyfriend to much. And I knew within a few months of our friendship that we were meant for each other...just celebrated 7 years! There are times when I could do without him for a moment but our little spats could never outweigh our genuine affection.

LOL so true with those emoticons. Congrats on the 7 years !

THANKS! And we didn't say "i love you" for almost a year. Sometimes actions are better than words.

And YES guys suck at it...other night at work guy made it obvious he was checking me out. After the third time I told him he was "gross" and walked away, and I'm a supervisor but I couldn't help but say something. Maybe I should make a post on this topic lol

dgirllamius

It was deffo love at first sight for me.

We met on World of Warcraft (online mmorpg) and we spoke for a few months. He came from the Germany, I came from the UK, so we arranged that he come over to England for a week to see how things go.

I went to meet him at Heathrow and I was bricking it. I was waiting in the terminal waiting area and I was sooooo nervous. I was pacing up and down like mad. I got speaking to a woman who was sitting next to me who was waiting for her husband on the same flight. I told her all about it, and she thought it was pretty amazing.

I got a text to say that his flight had been redirected to Stanstead, I was like noooooo. I didn't know how to get there, so he asked around and managed to get a coach from there to Heathrow.

He came walking through the doors, I could see him but he couldn't see me. I phoned him and said "over here". It was then I fell in love, I ran for him and gave him the most massive hug ever. And this was with someone I had never met before. But I knew it was right.

The week ended, and I begged and pleaded not for him to go. I refused to take him back to the airport, I was so madly in love. He agreed and we stayed in the UK for a bit before going back to Germany for good.

We're still together now, engaged to be married, living in Germany and planning to start a family. And we only met a year and a half ago.

When you know, you know

Tabby1980

Straight away! Well second time around lol! I was good friends with my husband's sister Rachel at university and met him, Paul, briefly at our graduation when he was only 16 ( oooh er! ) It wasn't love then as he was still a kid and I was in a long term relationship, but I do remember thinking how sweet and funny he was. Several years later I was Rachel's bridesmaid and as I walked into the church I saw Paul acting as an usher, our eyes met and I remember thinking 'Blimey, Rachel's brother really grew up!' He was 6'4 and drop dead gorgeous I was single again and we spent the whole of the reception dancing and chatting together. I felt totally relaxed with him, as if we'd known each other for years, which in a wierd way we had. The next day we both caught trains back down to London from Carlisle and Paul swapped his ticket to pretend he had to get the same train as me! We spent 7 hours together and at the end of it he carried my suitcase for me and helped me find a seat on my connecting train home - awwww ( That was the end of October 2006 ) We spent a few months swapping emails and chatting for hours on msn but I though he wouldn't fancy me as I would be too old and fat for him lol, ironically he said he thought I was out of his league and wouldn't look twice at my friends little brother in that way! Eventually we discovered we were both mistaken and he came to see me for a day out in Brighton and didn't go home untill 3 days later By February 2007 we were officially a couple and by April we'd decided we wanted to get married and have a family- I used to be a commitmentphobe lol! In May he took me back to the bench on Brighton pier where we had our first kiss and gave me a little plastic Hello Kitty ring, he was still a penniless student awwww again! By October Paul had graduated, got a job and swapped my ring for a beautiful diamond which he gave to me on a moonlit beach in Greeceafter writing 'will you marry me?' in the sand! We were married in August 2008 and have been so happy ever since. It helped that I already knew his family and I got a great friend for a sister but we really had no doubts.
Anyone who is cynical don't give up! I had a 7 year relationship which was a real struggle,full of arguments and tears and drama, I thought that was what relationships were like! I then went through a stage of being a total commitmentphobe, dating guys and having one night stands. I just hadn't met the right person! When you find them you will know! You will not have any doubts and everyone around you will think you're crazy for rushing into things! As for the monogamy thing that will change with the right person too, I used to always be lusting after other blokes even in my long term relationship I cheated and was a horrible girlfriend, but I think deep down inside I knew it wasn't going to last. With Paul I would NEVER cheat, I don't feel the need, we still fancy each other like crazy after 5 years and I can't imagine that changing. I hardly even notice other men now and even given the option of hooking up with some dream celebrity fittie I'd stay with my true love every time Believe in love at first sight, or second sight at least, it really does exist! x

hoosiermama1977

The day my (now husband) walked into my work I felt a strong physical attraction for him however it wasn't until months of laughing, chatting, working together that I realized it was more then that. He was hurting emotionally over something and I felt it so deeply - deeper then if it had been my own hurt. I just wanted to take the pain. That's when I knew. 14 years later and I still get so excited when he walks into the room, I get butterflies in my stomach. He makes me laugh, he calms me down, he supports me, he's my very best friend... but he also knows me and let's me have my space. Yea, we have tough times but the good outweighs the bad by so much that it doesn't feel tough with him.

So, I guess deep down I felt something right off the bat - something I'd never really felt ... but I knew it was love after we'd become friends.

M155AUS

I didn't really like my bf at start, but only went out with him because he was my friends mate and I felt like I 'should' go out with him.

Our first date I got very tipsy and the second I had a go at him because he was using his mobile on the date. I was brutal, and I now I look back, it was him just being really nervous.

I felt like that until about 9 months in when I got made redundant from work and went straight over to his place (he had been made redundant about 2 weeks before) and he was so nice and sweet and we spent more time together after 9 months of seeing each other only a wednesday evening for a drink. It was then I realised that I really did care about him and 7 years on, we are getting married next year. I was myself from the start so I never felt that I had to be on my best behaviour and he loved me from the start. He knew on our first date apparently.

Iamfit4life

I knew it was love when we would literally text eachother all day(it's long distance) and it still wasn't enough.
When he went out and bought a netbook as well so we could skype and I couldn't get enough of his face.
When he got sick and it broke my heart I couldn't be there.

Early on there was a point I told myself "you can save yourself some heartbreak and turmoil and get out now before it's too late" and I couldn't. Because he was all I wanted.

I've never for one minute regretted it.

FearAnLoathing

our first kiss

minnie22

I would have to be the first time I see him, was bridesmaid for my godparents daughter & he was the grooms work mate, I was 17yrs he's 9yrs older then me, we have been together ever since, it's our wedding anniversary on Saturday 13yrs, & we have 2 very special boys, that means the world to us. )

netchik

Been together for 15 years, and my breath still catches when I see him across a crowded room. Insane huh? Just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary

CaitlinMyers428

My boyfriend and I have been friends for 7 years. He finally came out and told me his feelings for me. This is when I was doing a pregnancy alone. We text for months and after I had my daughter and she was over a month old I invited him over. I had not seen him in a few years and as soon as I opened the door and our eyes met, I felt it. We have been together ever since and he fully accepts my daughter as his own. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend and father for my daughter.

Peep_chic

We knew each other since first grade and often we shared the same classroom. I knew he liked me but I wasnt atracted to him. Senior year in high school he came forward told me he had feelings for me. I knew he was a good guy, respectable and smart, top of the class. I told him he had 50-50% chance. My mind was made though I knew he didn't have a chance (or so I thought). Since we shared friends and sometimes talked I didnt want to turn him down right away so he'd atleast say he had a chance. We spent more time together as months went by. I had a clear picture of the qualities I was searching on a guy (loved his own family, kind, not selfish, not a hipocrite, fun and with sense of humor) He turned out to have these qualities and more (I knew his family too). So we got together 1 week before graduation. Dated 2 years and will have 10 yrs married January 2 kids and one on the way.

Peep_chic

I dont believe in magicall love. Love develops in a process, and is an action. Feelings are fickle and change too often to trust them. Most of the time I feel on top of the world with the man and others I dont get how we have lasted cause I cant stand him. Ive come to understand that to make things work in marriage in the long run you both have to yield to each others needs. Give and take. And in some situations compromise and concessions. I'm a child of divorse and I know that my parents marriage could have been saved exept for both of my parents were stuborn towards change. I've read several books and I find that His needs her needs building an affair proof marriage by williard F. Harley Jr. is one of the most helpful. It explains how love develops for those raw CYNICS out there is excellent. In short... we all have love accounts and the more (good moments) we have with someone the more love units that person has in your account and the more (bad moments) we have with someone the more withdraws the person has and you cant stand them. If you dont take care of your relationship your account with the other person go towards the negative and miss fancy pants at work can add units to her account at work. When you both understand how this work you can be careful and protect your relationship and not just "accidentally" fall in love with someone else. Anyways sorry its so much to read, but I do this topic Finding someone atractive or lust isn't a problem until you feed it to yourself too much.

MinnieInMaine

We fell hard for each other within just a few weeks (he even proposed!) but I didn't know for sure until about 2 years later. We'd been going through some rough times and I thought that meant it was time for us to separate and move on. Since we were living together and both on the lease, we needed to wait at least a month, and he was hoping I'd change my mind so he asked for a little more time. New Years was the deadline so it was time for me to make a now or never decision and I realized I just couldn't leave him. It broke my heart to even think about it! So we reconciled and New Years was our special holiday for a few years! :flowerforyou:
Nine years later I took him up on his proposal and the rest is history.

Liquid741

date #2...i seen my girl a few times in her office. we work at the same steel mill. she has banker hours in air condition...i work out in the mill. and everytime i seen her, i told myself that is the type of girl i could see myself with...we ended up meeting, going out, dating, and getting married....nothing but great times so far. still havent had a argument in 3.5yrs. life is good.

jessica_mom343

I knew the first time we kissed. I literally felt the "sparks". I was 15 and he was 17. I had boyfriends before, but none that I woke up wanting to see and went to bed thinking about. He wasn't my "type". He was and is a country boy and after our first phone call I was like who is the boy. He's talking about horses and deer hunting. I gave him a shot though...:-) We've been together now for 15 years and married for 13. We had our first child right after I turned 17 and now here we are three kids later and I grow more in love with him everyday. We have changed alot over the last 15 years, but we've changed together and for the better. We are so much alike. I'm now a full fledged country girl. We value our faith, Love God, love our family and put our marriage and our family as our top priority.

My father died when I was 5 and my mother was a widow at 35. Thinking that I could lose my husband makes my heart ache and the me sick to my stomach. He's the reason I smile when I was up every morning and see he drooling face on the pillow. LOL!!! God truly blessed me with this man!!

Jennjenn1974

I was at a bachelorette party, mostly inhebriated, when I looked at my best friend and said. "I'm in love with, Craig"

" Yeah I figured" is what she said back to me.

pumpkinmoccasin

We met on battle.net back when Warcraft 3 was popular... Falling in love was a gradual process since we talked a LOT, though it was definitely early on it sealed the deal when we met for the first time--he took a train to come meet me and that was it

jumperchick

well me and my bf dated for 3 months then broke up for a silly reason. anyways we were apart for a couple months and it was horrible !! i tried to date someone else, but the whole time i was thinking how it wasnt right and i missed my ex [now bf lol]. i wanted to call him but it was him that broke up with me and i refuse to be THAT girl....and out of the blue he texted me at like 4am and told me he couldnt stop thinking about me blah blah blah and he wanted to see me. so he came over and we got back together and thats when i realized i loved him and didnt want to be away from him. but i didnt tell him for a few months haha.


sorry that was so long !!!

Misiaxcore

All of these posts put a smile on my face =]

deeharley

I think I'm falling out of it actually.

=[

Awe noo =[

Hope it all works out for the best

Me too.
I'm trying my hardest. I usually end relationship by now, but for him I'm fighting.

I've "fallen in and out of love" - whatever the heck that actually means - with my husband of fourteen years several times. If he'd pay attention, he'd know when I'm really not feeling it because that's when he gets treated the best.

deeharley

Oh, and when I knew it was love - (insanity, if you read this don't hate me). He and I were from the metaphorical opposite sides of the tracks. I thought his family - the ones I knew - were stuck up and too full of themselves. Sounds unromantic, but I went through a serious, do I want to marry THIS guy - I mean look at those people? But after it was all said and done, I didn't care who his family were, I wanted to be with him, make him happy for the rest of his life. And I've done a patchy job of it.

dragonbait0126

It was at 2 different times for my husband and I. We met in college. He was walking behind me, saw my red hair, looked at his friend and said "she's mine." He hadn't seen my face and didn't know my name or anything else about me except that I was in band (we were at a rehersal when he saw me for the first time). He just saw a red-head playing percussion and knew he wanted to be with me. Jump forward about 4 weeks. We had hung out a few times with mutual friends. After dinner one night we were all standing around and he made the comment that he needed to go to the store. I offered to give him a ride (he had no car at the time) and when we got back to campus I asked if he wanted to hang out and watch TV (my roommate was gone for the night and I knew we'd have my room to ourselves). He says "sure, The Drew Carey Show is on." We're sitting on my bed watching TV and he starts holding my hand one finger at time. It started with our pinky fingers touching, then 2 fingers, then 3 and so on until we were holding hands. A bit later he leans over and kisses the side of my head. Every coupld of minutes he would kiss the side of my head again but each time was a bit closer to my face until he'd managed to work his way across the side of my head and cheek. He finally kisses me and that's when I knew. It just hit me. I actually looked across the room at the calendar hanging on my closet door to make a note of the date because I knew it was going to be an important one. Six months later it was my birthday and our 6 month anniversary. That was the first time we said I love you. That important date? It was August 26, 1998. We got engaged on December 23, 2009 and married on August 26, 2010 which was our 12 year anniversary. We just celebrated 13 years together and our 1 year wedding anniversary. We still hold hands constantly. Even in our sleep.