Anyone else shrinking in secret??

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24

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  • hush7hush
    hush7hush Posts: 2,273 Member
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    I must admit that when I started my current diet, I was very hush hush about it too.



    Saw my name up there and got curious. :D
  • inlander
    inlander Posts: 339 Member
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    Here's my opinion. Take it or leave it.

    The more people you tell about your attempt to lose weight/get fit, the more accountable you have to hold yourself. Try it, it works.
  • Megan2Project
    Megan2Project Posts: 351 Member
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    I have tried... it's just not for me. I've ended up looking like an idiot too many times. I am accountable to myself.

    I have lost 90lbs in the past, and kept it off for 3 years. It's just something that I feel better keeping to myself I think. Like its my little secret... I am a super open person in general, so I think that not talking about it, kinda makes me feel rebellious on its own.

    But, uh thanks for the support?
  • inlander
    inlander Posts: 339 Member
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    ^ ;) I hope you didn't think I was being a jerk face. Good luck to you either way.

    I would also encourage you to not dump the milk down the drain, though. So wasteful. :(
  • Megan2Project
    Megan2Project Posts: 351 Member
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    No, not being a jerkface, lol.

    I was just caught a little off-guard with so many people saying that I need to tell him, or tell so many people...
    I was more hoping to see if anyone else out there was doing something similar.
  • oopsiedaezie
    oopsiedaezie Posts: 93
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    :) I just noticed that. I can be such a goober sometimes :)
  • solpwr
    solpwr Posts: 1,039 Member
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    I'm not very good at keeping secrets. I don't talk about others. That's gossip. But keeping my own secrets... not good at that.
  • myguiltypleasure
    myguiltypleasure Posts: 25
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    With all my previous efforts dieting I've told everyone, talked about it all the time etc etc. Didn't really get me anywhere! In the end having everyone know I was trying to lose weight made things that much harder. A lot of people watching what I ate/how much I exercised, and joking with me if they saw me eating something they didn't think was "healthy". It ended up being discouraging. This time I'm only telling people on a need-to-know basis and it seems to be working out much better!

    Plus it's nice to have those "oh wow you look great!" comments out of no where. ;)
  • AI1108
    AI1108 Posts: 488 Member
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    I didn't really tell anyone at first but it was hard for me. I have a big family and when they're all eating very high calorie, high carb foods and see you grab an apple and move to the other room, they start wondering haha Then they noticed the change in my groceries from week to week, the added protein supplements, and the extra time I was spending at the gym. Eventually they noticed how my clothes started fitting better and all were like "damn you look awesome." Now the comments keep me going ;-)

    Eventually he'll probably realize you're doing something different and the added support will be awesome but there's no reason you HAVE to tell him right away if you don't want to. Every relationship's different.
  • capriciousmoon
    capriciousmoon Posts: 1,263 Member
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    I don't keep it a secret but I don't really mention it to anyone either. I buy my own food and eat alone, nobody pays attention to what other people eat or don't eat. I could go a week without eating or eat an entire pizza in one sitting and nobody would make peep about it.
  • _Ben
    _Ben Posts: 1,608 Member
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    Well good for you. The only thing id suggest is telling him so he doesnt keep buying you cake!
  • cutmd
    cutmd Posts: 1,168 Member
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    I diet in "secret" because I only have a few pounds to lose and don't want to hear "you don't need to lose weight". It will just become a tape i play in my head when I'm feeling lazy or extra hungry. DH doesn't believe in calorie counting and my counting annoys him so I am open about the exercising and count in secret :wink:
  • Leanne3552000
    Leanne3552000 Posts: 395 Member
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    I don't want anyone to know I'm trying to lose weight because I don't want their opinions on it. A couple of close friends know I'm extremely self consious of my recent gain. My friends and family are used to me chosing healthy options so no one has noticed any difference in my eating habbits. The only person who knows i've been exercising alot more is my flat mate and sometimes she tells people. They are always shocked to hear it which is exactly why I don't tell people. I find their reactions very discouraging.
  • hush7hush
    hush7hush Posts: 2,273 Member
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    I've stopped talking about it because people think I obsess.
    Which I obviously don't.

    It's more of a secret now. Sometimes people say "dieting" like it's a dirty word. Especially since I don't consider it dieting.
  • vizamy
    vizamy Posts: 60 Member
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    I didn't tell my husband "as such" but I did ask him to stop bringing home chocolates etc. Not just for me but for the kids too, doesn't do them good to have all that around.

    The main reason he knew was that my son and I have both been working together to get more healthy - he podged up a bit while he was ill and he doesn't need that, while I am on a more serious weight loss and fitness journey.

    I don't go broadcasting it either.
  • Angie789
    Angie789 Posts: 61 Member
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    How am I sabbotaging? I have someone who sees me everyday, for more of the day than he does, who helps keep me on track.
    It's great that you have someone to keep you on track. I think the sabotaging comments have to do with the story you told - your husband doesn't know, so he is placing temptations right in front of without even realizing what he's doing. As you know from your past experiences, losing weight & getting healthy can be hard, and for many of us, the best way to manage temptations is to avoid them, particularly in the early days of the journey. By not telling your husband about your lifestyle changes, you seem to be placing additional obstacles in your own way - he'll keep bringing home unhealthy snacks that you like to eat, so you are constantly dealing with temptation (and it sounds like it already has affected you - would you have eaten part of a candy bar if it wasn't in your house?).

    Everybody has to figure out what works for them, and if this plan does, more power to you. I understand not wanting to have the same conversation about dieting with him again. But be sure you have weighed the pros & cons - is it worse to talk about another weight loss attempt or to have to deal with chocolate in the house all the time?
  • netchik
    netchik Posts: 587 Member
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    I didn't tell my husband for 4 weeks. He caught me one morning getiing dressed and told me I'd really slimmed down which made me :huh: Because i didn't think i had made any progress.

    He immediately told me we'd do it together and he joined mfp the same day. My ex would never have done that, and had i been in a different relationship i would be doing this is secret as well. There is a shame in being a big girl that it takes a long time to get over. Tell the people YOU want to tell, you aren't setting yourself up to fail becaus you have your MFP support network. If you are worried about wasting the milk, next time pop it in the fridge "for later". And then wait for hubby to eye it off after a night out...
  • whatwentwrong
    whatwentwrong Posts: 228
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    this is the first time i've really told people i was dieting, usually it doesn't last long and i don't want people to think i'm a failure. i still weigh/exercise in secret tho >_>
    A lot of people watching what I ate/how much I exercised, and joking with me if they saw me eating something they didn't think was "healthy". It ended up being discouraging.

    this is the worst! my friend posted a picture of some fake food, it was some kind of insane dessert burger thing, and i was like oh i'd eat the crap out of that, and she was like omg but you're on a diet you can't eat stuff like that anymore! yeah, i was totally planning on going out and getting 2 cakes and 2 pounds of ground beef and making a cakeburger before you stopped me, THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN -_-
  • marzahl68
    marzahl68 Posts: 201
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    You hit the nail on the head! Both hubby and my daugther are overweight. I'm very excited about every pound I lose and I'm also very determined. I realized thought every time I don't eat the same thing they do for dinner, I'm actually telling them "What you're eating is wrong, it's fattening and therefore I won't touch it!"
    Both know I'm changing my eating habits, both know why and I don't keep it a secret when I've lost another pound. They make efforts to accomodate me: Subway so I can have a veggie delight instead of McDondald's and hubby asks me if I have enough calories to spend to go to lunch with him. My daugther doesn't want to eat meat. It's a fad, we all know it but it's a choice she made and we'll accomodate her as much as we can. I expect the same the other way around.
  • Painten
    Painten Posts: 499 Member
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    My OH isn't really supportive to me. I had to tell him though even for the reason that he likes all the bad foods and he will bring them home or want to order takeaways for dinner, etc. If i hadn't told him then he'd have kept bringing stuff home, although to be fair he still does bring stuff home. Every so often we have a big argument where i tell him he's the least supportive man on the planet and for a little while it works till it goes again. I doubt i'd have lasted this long if i hadn't of told him. Firstly we dont' have enough money for me to see food thrown away because he's bought it and i haven't told him i'm not willing to eat it, and secondly i've not enough will power to throw food away. By not telling him i wouldn't have been able to give him the opportunity to be supportive.

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