Seriously?? Obesity and Child abuse questionable....

MFPAddict

I apologize for not taking the time to read the entire thread or the story in question, but I just don't have the time. I am making an assumption that CYS was somehow got involved, and their investigation led to police involvement. In my opinion, the police department alone should not have that discretion. I am not sure where I stand on whether she should be in jail, but the child definitely needed to be removed from the house.

There is a kid "fat camp" type of show that I used to watch with my wife. There was a VERY heavy girl on the show. She made amazing progress at the camp, but strugled once she went home. In that case, the mother was definitely the problem. One of the counselors came to visit and showed the home how to make a healthy pizza, and all the mother did was complain about how it tasted. It was so sad that the child was trying to educate her overweight mother about making healthy choices.

sweetiepie31612

And is the pediatrician going to be brought up on patient negligence? Why didn't the child's pediatrician step in before it got that far... or even the school for that matter...

it's about education people ... not punishment.

They did step in. The mother chose not to listen. She didn't take the kid for treatments and education b/c her work schedule didn't allow for it. Similarly, even after the kid was put on a diet plan, she'd still get him fast food b/c she needed to sleep in between in two jobs. She didn't do what needed to be done and thats why the child was removed.

chelekaz

And is the pediatrician going to be brought up on patient negligence? Why didn't the child's pediatrician step in before it got that far... or even the school for that matter...

it's about education people ... not punishment.

Probably not because I bet they said something to the parent...it's not listed, but I know any Doctor would say something.

And the whole slippery slope thing about obese/heavy etc....that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. You can play the what if game till the cows come home, it's ridiculous.

I worked in a Family Center and we did have parents that had mandatory classes that they had to attend on healthy, nutrition, etc when the doctors or schools had concerns and went to Children and Youth. The doctors were mandated that everything had to be in writing.

It is a shame that this child has to suffer with being obese. School is hard enough w/o what I can imagine is harsh taunting. I don't know where your comment about slippery slope obese / heavy ... ? I never played a what if game.. just saying there were others around who should have stepped in to get them help before he got that heavy!!

Iwillshyne

Several of you clearly do not understand how the system works... They would not have just went in and said, "Wow that kids fat, foster care for him!" They would have done all of that stuff you are preaching about... educating the mother, getting them in touch with a nutritionist, making sure they had the appropriate finances in place to buy healthy foods, etc. For the child to have been removed, and the mother charged... that means she ignored all of this assistance and continued to let her child suffer..

Does that change your opinion?

It does some what change my opinion. But I still can't come to grips with such a severe punishment. Although I do not know what else could have been done instead (since you stated all that took place before the kid was removed)...this is a lose, lose situation. Yes, he lost weight but how sad and confused he must have been to learn that No, you can't go home with your mom today, son. Sadden me...

Iwillshyne

What does the OP have to say about this? Why do so many people post such heated topics and not comment on them for theirself?

...keep reading booh!

Iwillshyne

What does the OP have to say about this? Why do so many people post such heated topics and not comment on them for theirself?

...keep reading booh!

bry_all01

What does the OP have to say about this? Why do so many people post such heated topics and not comment on them for theirself?

...keep reading booh!

Lol, I did, but you didn't respond until after I posted that. :flowerforyou:

JennsLosing

Yes, I think it was child abuse/neglect and the arrest was justified. Who would do that to their child? That is the equivalent of starving a child, in my opinion. She does not deserve to have him and I am glad he is getting down to a healthy weight. Poor baby.

Really, that is just ridiculous. Just because her child is overweight doesn't mean she needs to be arrested. That is dumb! Plain and simple! I was an overweight child and I don't believe arrest is the solution and breaking up the family isn't either! Educate the parent and child! All I can say is WOW!

400 pounds at 13 isnt "overweight" thats morbidly obese...im not sure if jail should be the answer to it, but definitely someone should of intervened to determine whether its due to a medical condition, and to get some nutrition classes, and if the parents still do nothing then i agree with jail.

pain_is_weakness

I read about the push for this on twitter over the summer. Arrested, I don't think so. That won't help anyone. Educated, most definitely.

I work with so many people trying to turn them onto a healthy lifestyle. Most times the parents are just ignorant and that leads to obesity. I mean, a freaking Happy Meal with just a burger and fries has almost 500 calories! Now what parent really sits to think about that. It sure doesn't seem that much from what you get. And don't get me started on the Lunchables and popsicles and fruit juices. They market themselves as being great for kids but are just loaded with artificial crap that our bodies can't process.

If they can spend money to arrest parents, they should be able to invest money on actually educating our society.

I agree with everything you said! Arrested, criminal charges? Really, I think that is rediculous!

cabaray

13 & 400 pounds is insane. It took me 30 years to get close to that. I believe in this case it was best for the child.
Now, when are they going to crack down on people who smoke heavily around their children? Just as abusive if you ask me! I know people that smoke in the house and the car with asthmatic children. I don't see anyone helping those children.

Lsmith7915

I think help could have been offered to the whole family, in a better way. The state is paying for the care of this child, and the prosecution of the family. That money would have been better spent getting them all the counselling they needed to see that this unhealthy lifestyle could be changed.

bry_all01

I read about the push for this on twitter over the summer. Arrested, I don't think so. That won't help anyone. Educated, most definitely.

I work with so many people trying to turn them onto a healthy lifestyle. Most times the parents are just ignorant and that leads to obesity. I mean, a freaking Happy Meal with just a burger and fries has almost 500 calories! Now what parent really sits to think about that. It sure doesn't seem that much from what you get. And don't get me started on the Lunchables and popsicles and fruit juices. They market themselves as being great for kids but are just loaded with artificial crap that our bodies can't process.

If they can spend money to arrest parents, they should be able to invest money on actually educating our society.

I agree with everything you said! Arrested, criminal charges? Really, I think that is rediculous!

so, it woudn't be an issue until say the kid died, then? Just curious, not trying to sway one way or the other....

sweetiepie31612

I read about the push for this on twitter over the summer. Arrested, I don't think so. That won't help anyone. Educated, most definitely.

I work with so many people trying to turn them onto a healthy lifestyle. Most times the parents are just ignorant and that leads to obesity. I mean, a freaking Happy Meal with just a burger and fries has almost 500 calories! Now what parent really sits to think about that. It sure doesn't seem that much from what you get. And don't get me started on the Lunchables and popsicles and fruit juices. They market themselves as being great for kids but are just loaded with artificial crap that our bodies can't process.

If they can spend money to arrest parents, they should be able to invest money on actually educating our society.

I agree with everything you said! Arrested, criminal charges? Really, I think that is rediculous!

so, it woudn't be an issue until say the kid died, then?

My thoughts exactly. What happens when the KID drops dead of a massive heart attack? We wouldn't arrest the mother? Why not? We'd arrest her if her son died from health problems due to not being fed.

The mother has had ample opportunity to fix this and have her son remain in her custody. She chose not to. She made a conscious decision to not get her child healthy. For that she needs to be punished.

denisegolden

there are so many circumstances that can sway my opinion one way or the other. first of all, was health education even offered to mom as an option to help this child? was the child experiencing health problems that mom was ignoring? was there other issues that may warrent taking this child out of the home and away from mom? how easily was the child able to drop the weight after his dimissle from mom? so many questions, but based soley on the information given, i would say it is justified...when it comes to my children and i have four boys, please always side with caution! My boys are my life and they come before all, their health and well being is of the upmost importance, and if the school, the government, etc. knows that i can be doing better by my child, and it is genuine, that please let me know, because that is what i want for my boys. three of my four boys have been or are overweight, due to my ignorance, in part. they are children and eatr what i provide for them, and entertain themselves with what i provide for them... i was not providing a heathy lifestyle. that has change! last year i was diagnosed diabetic, among other negative diagnosis, and decided i needed to educate myself on living heathier. in the process i have learned how to better take car of myself and my family...heathier food options as well as heathier entertainment options. i have lost over 130, my seventeen year old( who is 6 foot tall) has went from220+ to a healthier 175, my 14 year old has gained 2 1/2 inches in height and lost two pants sizes in width(he is now at a heathy weight), my 11 year old, we are still fighting with his obesity, but he has lost some weight, best of all he is getting more active, and building his self esteem by accoplishing physical tasks that he didnt even have a desire to do last summer. oddly enough, we fight to keep weight on my 6 year old, he surpasses all of our energy levels and that child has a non stop metabolism..all in all, i want the best for my boys, as i believe most parents do, and if that meant to take my child away, so they could get heathy, i guess i would have to agree with it.

ItsCasey

I do not think it was necessary! If that is the case I would have been taken from my parents. My parents love me and it was not their fault I was over weight. They should be taking away the children out there that are in abusive homes or homes where their parents are drug addicts and purposfully neglect and abuse them, not a child because he is overweight...give me a break!

Really? You weighed 400 lbs as a 13-year-old? Because that's what we're talking about here. We're not talking about a kid who is a little on the pudgy side. We're talking about a kid who passed "morbidly obese" 200 lbs ago. It's child abuse no matter how you slice it.

And I don't want to hear that maybe some parents just aren't educated enough. Maybe a lot of parents don't know which foods have which nutrients and how much of each their kids should be eating every day. But no adult is so freaking stupid that they don't understand that junk food combined with no exercise makes you fat. They're not so stupid that they can't look at their kids and what their kids are eating and put 2 and 2 together.

I was overweight as a child, too ... by 10 or 15 lbs, compared to most other girls my age. Not by 300 lbs. Huge difference.

lawtechie

My thoughts exactly. What happens when the KID drops dead of a massive heart attack? We wouldn't arrest the mother? Why not? We'd arrest her if her son died from health problems due to not being fed.

The mother has had ample opportunity to fix this and have her son remain in her custody. She chose not to. She made a conscious decision to not get her child healthy. For that she needs to be punished.

I'm not fully excusing the mom, but heres' something just as important to keep in mind. It sounds like she worked 2-3 jobs. I don't think that was for frivilous spending money. She's working that to keep a roof over their heads and food (albeit bad) in their bodies. In this economy, I wouldn't want to see someone lose their job because of multiple court dates. Employers would likely fire her, and then the consequences would tumble from there... lost job, lost home, lost boy, lost ??? Just lost everything.

It's too easy to be on the high horse and criticize, but until you've lived it -- what are you going to do? Is the goal for society to keep families together, or is the goal to tear them apart during hard times. // Just something to consider.

fteale

I think removing children from their parents should only ever be an absolute last straw after all other avenues have been exhausted, and then only if the child's life or wellbeing is in danger.

Saying that, I think it is disgusting that any parent would let their young child get to 400lbs.

ItsCasey

Is the goal for society to keep families together, or is the goal to tear them apart during hard times. // Just something to consider.

The goal is to keep kids away from people who put their health and well-being in danger.

Iwillshyne

What does the OP have to say about this? Why do so many people post such heated topics and not comment on them for theirself?

...keep reading booh!

Lol, I did, but you didn't respond until after I posted that. :flowerforyou:

I responded before I read your post, hun. Now that I have learned how the system works and that the mom did not comply, my feelings for the mother has changed, but I can't say that I in total agreeance with removing the kid. And maybe thats just the mommy in me.... My opinion may not be in your favor. Regardless, this is a sad situation on both ends. Could you imagine your kid being take from you?? Could you imagine as a kid being taken away from your mom? sad....

writtenINthestars

FYI: According to the story she was seeing the doctor/peds on a regular bases. And received very little help, but lots of criticism.

Criticism as in "stop feeding him all this food"? I don't know what was and wasn't said...but I think that statement is pretty open ended because what "help" are they suppose to give?

My friend who's daughter is 40 lbs overweight is told what and when to feed her kid...and herself...does she follow it? Nope and she has every excuse in the book for why...