Curious about something...

kennethmgreen

For some reason, unless it's my mother or someone of that nature, no one believes me.

Do you mean another family member? Or a really maternal friend?

I trust and believe him when he says he doesn't.

Then who cares what we say on the Internet?

I don't get sick of him, he doesn't get sick of me. We're just happy to be together.

What does he say about this thread?

Why are certain people so insistent that he does NOT do these things, he's a liar, I'M a liar and so on?

See my response to #2 above. Also, because there is nothing on TV.

I have literally had someone yell at me and get so heated telling me how stupid I am to believe these things. Are people just that cynical? Are they jealous? It's seriously annoying! I don't even like to talk about him anymore when people ask because all I get is that I'm just young and stupid.

Have you ever had anyone do that to you?

Is that was this post is about? Are you asking if I've ever had anyone do this same behavior to me? No.

brittanyjeanxo

For some reason, unless it's my mother or someone of that nature, no one believes me.

Do you mean another family member? Or a really maternal friend?

I trust and believe him when he says he doesn't.

Then who cares what we say on the Internet?

I don't get sick of him, he doesn't get sick of me. We're just happy to be together.

What does he say about this thread?

Why are certain people so insistent that he does NOT do these things, he's a liar, I'M a liar and so on?

See my response to #2 above. Also, because there is nothing on TV.

I have literally had someone yell at me and get so heated telling me how stupid I am to believe these things. Are people just that cynical? Are they jealous? It's seriously annoying! I don't even like to talk about him anymore when people ask because all I get is that I'm just young and stupid.

Have you ever had anyone do that to you?

Is that was this post is about? Are you asking if I've ever had anyone do this same behavior to me? No.

That's a lot of questions, lol!

Family member.
Good point.
He explained it, see above.
Haha.
Sort of, and I'm glad for you.

Whew.

suzycreamcheese

depends what ypu mean by finding someone attractive.
I dont actually fancy anyone except my OH. I find people good looking if they are, but i dont feel any high level of attraction towards anyone that would make me be interested in them sexually. Is that what you mean?

MFPAddict

Different Strokes for Different Folks

What I believe most people are skeptical about is the attractiion to other women comment. Human nature just doesn't work like that. Not suggesting he desires to be with othe women, but unless he is locked up in your basement I just don't believe that he doesn't encounter women he feels are attractive.

I totally get the not getting tired of each other comment. Sometimes two people just enjoy each other's company that much.

There was a comment about verbalizing an attraction being a hit to a woman's self esteem. Another different strokes for different folks thing. Obsessing over another woman might bother my wife, but commenting about a woman being attractive doesn't phase her in the least. Nor does it bother me that she thinks my daughter's swim teacher is HOT.

PowerEqualsStrengthOverTime

When you find a love that feels "old" but you make the old love feel new...You have found an amazing partner to share you journey in life...I've been there....and its AWESOME

Well put, and enough said!

It's an amazing, amazing feeling when you find someone that is your best friend and your spouse all in one. Glad for you!

sunkisses

I cannot imagine caring that much about another couple's relationship.

Iamfit4life

I'm also a cynic. I mean I can buy that he loves you a whole ton.

But some of the stuff is a bit out there. That said, it's not MY job or ANYBODY elses to believe. But you, and him.
People need to waste much less time worrying about other people.

If they don't believe him or you, eff them. They don't have to.

Just do your thing.

myofibril

I think on a concious level it is entirely possible that the OP's boyfriend doesn't look at other women or doesn't find any other woman attractive apart fom her.

On an unconscious or physiological level however I think it is highly unlikely. I am confident that if you put the gentleman under observation in controlled labortaory conditions and presented him to a sufficient amount of stimuli (be it hard core or soft core porn, Victoria Secret catalogues, a lapdance, swimwear models etc) other than the OP he would exhibit physical signs of attraction (such as pupil dilation, heightened self touching, shortness of breath and so on). I think this would hold true even if his conscious mind attempted to override that.

In the grand scheme of things that doesn't really matter though. If someone loves you and shows you that through their actions then what may be happening on a different level won't be of any concern.

Signed: a realistic cynical romantic.

FauxNinja

Nick (my SO) and I have this thing where we will NOT promise each other something unless we mean it. We don't lie to each other or keep things from each other. We just have a level of trust there. For some reason, unless it's my mother or someone of that nature, no one believes me. I've been told I'm lying about it, that he lies anyway, etc. He also doesn't look at other women or think any other woman is attractive* (see post on 2nd page) I can understand how that would make anyone a little skeptical, but he honestly doesn't. I trust and believe him when he says he doesn't. I have also been told he's lying about it, I'm lying about it, I'm naiive, and so on. Then there's the fact that, with the exception of when I go to class 3 nights a week, we are together 24/7. We shop together, run errands together, live together, even worked together (until we both quit) and we honest to goodness do not get "tired" of each other. I don't get sick of him, he doesn't get sick of me. We're just happy to be together.

Why are certain people so insistent that he does NOT do these things, he's a liar, I'M a liar and so on? I have literally had someone yell at me and get so heated telling me how stupid I am to believe these things. Are people just that cynical? Are they jealous? It's seriously annoying! I don't even like to talk about him anymore when people ask because all I get is that I'm just young and stupid.

Have you ever had anyone do that to you?

Sounds great. Who care what other people think?

dang_girl

I think it's human nature to find others attractive and being in a relationship doesn't stop that attraction from happening. The key is being honest with your partner. My ex would constantly point out how "hot" he found another woman when we were in public together. I'm not the jealous type but being discreet was never one of his finer points. Throw balance and trust into the mix and hope for the best

MFPAddict

I am confident that if you put the gentleman under observation in controlled labortaory conditions and presented him to a sufficient amount of stimuli (be it hard core or soft core porn, Victoria Secret catalogues, a lapdance, swimwear models etc) other than the OP he would exhibit physical signs of attraction (such as pupil dilation, heightened self touching, shortness of breath and so on). I think this would hold true even if his conscious mind attempted to override that.

Where can I sign up for this study?

PandaofDestruction

Ok- so I am happy with my husband, during the good, the bad and the indifferent, we love and support each other, that is all that matters, no one has the ability to make him or I feel bad about our relationship- we love each other, we know how things work for us, and we know that we will be together forever. So no matter what happens, we can work it out, and if people want to judge that is their issue. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for loving someone, I have to admit that you are a very fortunate person for having the relationship that you do, and things will change. (speaking from experience-not bad changes, but there will be changes and adjustments) So ignore the people who get upset and meddle in the inner workings of your relationship- if it is working for you two then GREAT! Enjoy the time you spend together and enjoy each other.

Ocarina

If you're happy it doesn't matter what others think.

Having said that I don't believe he is being honest about never seeing a pretty girl. Or finding anyone else attractive.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I believe nothing should matter over the happiness you share between you and your partner. I would take into consideration a bunch of people's concern but still it all boils down to what you and your partner agree on. Relationships are between two people, not between the family and you. That I think would actually cause a relationship to break up anyways...

But yeah, if a man doesn't find other women attractive then I would question his sexuality. He doesn't have to say it but shouldn't deny it either.

brittanyjeanxo

I cannot imagine caring that much about another couple's relationship.

Right?!

livnlite

I can't say I'd be cynical but I would be curious as to why he says he doesn't find ANY other women attractive. Finding other women attractive and being attracted to them is not exactly the same thing. You can still look and not feel like you are doing something bad..and long as it is restricted to LOOKING.

Claiming to NOT be attracted to other women on any level is not even logical and highly unnatural. If he really experiences no healthy attraction to members of the opposite sex, then you may have bigger problems that you think.