Party fouls:

infamousmk

Mines more sad than hilarious. Sad for me, maybe funny for you. lol I had the most sexy pair of tall, delicate wine glasses. I was so protective...I had a few glasses of wine, and set it on the counter. My husband walked into the kitchen and I panicked because I just new he was going to break it! I ran in there and in my haste to save the glass from my husband, I knock it off the counter and it shatters. He just stands there looking at me like W.T.F? Because he was no where near it. HAHA!! Picture me in slow motion flying across the kitchen ""Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" and then swiftly knock it on the floor. Wow.

:indifferent:

I buy all of my glassware at stores where I know they can be easily replaced. Do not ever ask me to tell you the story of why the inside of our linen closet is stained with red wine...

Oh, also never ask me why all of my shirts have little holes on the front near the bottom hem. If you can guess why, I'll send your *kitten* a picture of my cleavage.

YukonJoy

Mines more sad than hilarious. Sad for me, maybe funny for you. lol I had the most sexy pair of tall, delicate wine glasses. I was so protective...I had a few glasses of wine, and set it on the counter. My husband walked into the kitchen and I panicked because I just new he was going to break it! I ran in there and in my haste to save the glass from my husband, I knock it off the counter and it shatters. He just stands there looking at me like W.T.F? Because he was no where near it. HAHA!! Picture me in slow motion flying across the kitchen ""Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" and then swiftly knock it on the floor. Wow.

:indifferent:

I buy all of my glassware at stores where I know they can be easily replaced. Do not ever ask me to tell you the story of why the inside of our linen closet is stained with red wine...

Oh, also never ask me why all of my shirts have little holes on the front near the bottom hem. If you can guess why, I'll send your *kitten* a picture of my cleavage.

They are from your belt buckle.

Now send me the boobies.

JAllen32

Mines more sad than hilarious. Sad for me, maybe funny for you. lol I had the most sexy pair of tall, delicate wine glasses. I was so protective...I had a few glasses of wine, and set it on the counter. My husband walked into the kitchen and I panicked because I just new he was going to break it! I ran in there and in my haste to save the glass from my husband, I knock it off the counter and it shatters. He just stands there looking at me like W.T.F? Because he was no where near it. HAHA!! Picture me in slow motion flying across the kitchen ""Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" and then swiftly knock it on the floor. Wow.

:indifferent:

I buy all of my glassware at stores where I know they can be easily replaced. Do not ever ask me to tell you the story of why the inside of our linen closet is stained with red wine...

Oh, also never ask me why all of my shirts have little holes on the front near the bottom hem. If you can guess why, I'll send your *kitten* a picture of my cleavage.

Hey, why are there wine stains in your linen closet?

Also, I know why. I have holes in all mine too...ugh. In my case, its from my button rubbing on them against my desk at work. Or the kitchen counter when I'm cooking, or the table when I'm eating. AWFUL!

infamousmk

The holes are neither from buttons, desks, counters, or belt buckles. Nice try though!



Why is the inside of the linen closet stained with red wine? One night the boyfriend and I were drinking red wine and watching something on TV. It was probably Storm Chasers or NCIS. It was getting chilly and we wanted to cuddle, so being the clever self that I am, I got up to get us an extra throw blanket from the linen closet. Of course I took my wine glass with me - this is not my first rodeo. The boyfriend installed all of his router, wireless internet, ethernet, etc. in the linen closet, because it's in the center of the house and out of the way. So, I reach up to grab one of my fabulous fleece throw blankets, it snags some cables from the IT clusterfvck on the side, and the external harddrive begins to tumble from the top shelf. (BTW, when did we get an external hard drive??) ... the external hard drive breaks loose from it's cables, hits my wine glass, and sends the whole mess crashing to the floor. The glass breaks. the hard drive starts wheezing, and the red whine splatters ALL OVER the inside of the white wood door, up the front of all of my white linenes, and all over the fabulous fleece throw blanket. Not to mention all over my adorable pink and black polkadotted PJs.

All of the bleach in my kingdom couldn't get the wine out of the linens, PJs, and throw blanket. But the external harddrive is fine!

YukonJoy

Club soda and salt.


Says my mommy. lol

snewsome7

Party foul: having a fruit fly problem for months.. can't get rid of those things to save my life! I've cleaned , scrubbed, everything! I have gotten pretty good at killing them though!

JAllen32

The holes are neither from buttons, desks, counters, or belt buckles. Nice try though!



Why is the inside of the linen closet stained with red wine? One night the boyfriend and I were drinking red wine and watching something on TV. It was probably Storm Chasers or NCIS. It was getting chilly and we wanted to cuddle, so being the clever self that I am, I got up to get us an extra throw blanket from the linen closet. Of course I took my wine glass with me - this is not my first rodeo. The boyfriend installed all of his router, wireless internet, ethernet, etc. in the linen closet, because it's in the center of the house and out of the way. So, I reach up to grab one of my fabulous fleece throw blankets, it snags some cables from the IT clusterfvck on the side, and the external harddrive begins to tumble from the top shelf. (BTW, when did we get an external hard drive??) ... the external hard drive breaks loose from it's cables, hits my wine glass, and sends the whole mess crashing to the floor. The glass breaks. the hard drive starts wheezing, and the red whine splatters ALL OVER the inside of the white wood door, up the front of all of my white linenes, and all over the fabulous fleece throw blanket. Not to mention all over my adorable pink and black polkadotted PJs.

All of the bleach in my kingdom couldn't get the wine out of the linens, PJs, and throw blanket. But the external harddrive is fine!

First: DARN! I love *kitten* cleavage.

B. That is a very scary story. :indifferent: I'm glad I drink white wine.

3. I feel sorry for your PJs.


::edited for spelling::

snewsome7

Just remembered this. Last December I was out celebrating my birthday. At this bar, on your birthday they give you a "B.J." shot from the piano man. For some reason this year the piano man made me take the shot in front of anyone. This wasn't the first time I have taken this shot. So I take the shot with no hand, but don't take the glass out of my mouth before I swallow and the shot comes out of my nose...in front of everyone. I felt real cool that night lol

infamousmk

Just remembered this. Last December I was out celebrating my birthday. At this bar, on your birthday they give you a "B.J." shot from the piano man. For some reason this year the piano man made me take the shot in front of anyone. This wasn't the first time I have taken this shot. So I take the shot with no hand, but don't take the glass out of my mouth before I swallow and the shot comes out of my nose...in front of everyone. I felt real cool that night lol

Oh, dang!! You are not the first person I've heard having trouble with the BJ shot!! They're brutal!

snewsome7

As long as you swallow AFTER you take the glass out of your mouth it works haha. There was a table cheering me on and then when it came out of my nose they were all "Ummmm awkward...." Hahaha

dumb_blondes_rock

Someone else's party foul, not mine

We were at a house party, and all these youngsters were talking about falmming dr peppers....so, they pour in the dr pepper, then the alcohol, and light it on fire......no one told the person you are supposed to blow out the flame before you drink it, so he drinks the flame, the hot glass blisters his lip, he spills his drink, which goes on his pants, which catches his pants on fire.....i laughed so hard i peed my pants a little...the times i wish i had a video recorder going

dumb_blondes_rock

Just remembered this. Last December I was out celebrating my birthday. At this bar, on your birthday they give you a "B.J." shot from the piano man. For some reason this year the piano man made me take the shot in front of anyone. This wasn't the first time I have taken this shot. So I take the shot with no hand, but don't take the glass out of my mouth before I swallow and the shot comes out of my nose...in front of everyone. I felt real cool that night lol

Oh, dang!! You are not the first person I've heard having trouble with the BJ shot!! They're brutal!

So back in my sneaky days (i was 19 i believe) we were at the elephant bar and i became the bj champion of 07....and every year after that.....the drink is so delish that i can't help but gulp it down

dumb_blondes_rock

Proud of my falls (or fouls) and proud of the puke and rally.

hmm i don't think its THAT bad, unless you ended up making out with someone afterwards

NurseHthr

Oh Lord I have too many to count...I'll start with a fairly safe one though
My hubby and daughter went out of town for the weekend. I decide it's gonna be a good old fashioned moms night in. Me, the laptop and a bottle of merlot.
A few hours and an empty bottle of wine later I decide I had better stumble up to bed. I take the last glass and bring it up with me. I have lived in this house for 5 years and somehow miscount the steps. I trip on the last step (going UP the stairs) wine and me goes down to the floor. My husband is SUPER ANAL about stains and s*hit so after mourning the loss of my last glass of wine I get straight to work cleaning it up. I scrub and scrub and about 15 minutes later I am satisfied with the results. I collapse into bed and call it a night.
Upon waking up in the morning, I see I did the WORST JOB EVER cleaning it up and have to try again and again. Worse yet, the carpet now looks blackish instead of like red wine. After it has now set for 12 hours it didn't get much better. So I did what any good wife and mother would do.
I blamed the dog

JAllen32

Oh Lord I have too many to count...I'll start with a fairly safe one though
My hubby and daughter went out of town for the weekend. I decide it's gonna be a good old fashioned moms night in. Me, the laptop and a bottle of merlot.
A few hours and an empty bottle of wine later I decide I had better stumble up to bed. I take the last glass and bring it up with me. I have lived in this house for 5 years and somehow miscount the steps. I trip on the last step (going UP the stairs) wine and me goes down to the floor. My husband is SUPER ANAL about stains and s*hit so after mourning the loss of my last glass of wine I get straight to work cleaning it up. I scrub and scrub and about 15 minutes later I am satisfied with the results. I collapse into bed and call it a night.
Upon waking up in the morning, I see I did the WORST JOB EVER cleaning it up and have to try again and again. Worse yet, the carpet now looks blackish instead of like red wine. After it has now set for 12 hours it didn't get much better. So I did what any good wife and mother would do.
I blamed the dog

Awesome.