confrontation, what do you think?

hardatwork45

Okay,
so I go to the gym every morning and get on the elliptical and lately there is a woman that no matter what machine I'm on she is right next to me or right in front of me. The problem is that she wears the worse smelling perfume and lots of it. I have actually stopped in the middle of a workout to switch machines to get away from her. Today was the worst, I only had like 15 minutes left and she comes up right next to me and today the perfume is really heavy to the point that it got my sinuses throbbing. I want to be polite and not say anything to her but I can't take it, its making me very uncomfortable and sick. The girls at the front say there is nothing they can do because she's not bothering anyone but I'm telling you I don't know what kind of skunk oil she is putting on but I was feeling sick this morning after smelling that stuff for 5 minutes. I am going to confront her tomorrow and just ask that she not come so close to me during workouts because her perfume is killing my sinuses, what do you think? I don't want to offend her but I cant take it anymore and I can go super early and run late she is always there so there's no getting around her, I just have to come out and do it, have you ever had to confront someone and how did it go?

Hoppymom

Since you tried working with the staff and they failed to step up then..Yes. I would say, "Excuse me. I am sure that your perfume is lovely but I seem to have an allergy to it." Explain that you are very uncomfortable from it when she worksout so near wearing the perfume and would she please try to use machines that are not so close to you. That it is nothing personal. If that does not work go to the gym director or the corporate offices.

rbryntes

I think you should move to a different machine or workout at a different time.

bikermike5094

i had a lady that worked for me in a call center that had the worst halitosis (bad breath) you've ever smelled. she only had a few teeth and was scheduled for dentures in a few weeks anyways. But people around her complined constantly and seriously, you couldnt get within 5 feet of her and you would smell the rot and decay. so I had to counsel her on it.. .that really sucked.. .how to you tell a grown lady that her breath stinks and she needs to use mouthwash. Ahhh.. the joys of management....

Qarol

I think you should move to a different machine or workout at a different time.

This...confronting her will likely not go well, no matter how "polite" you are

kiawya

You have to say something.

bry_all01

saying something may just make things SO much worse, not to mention, completely uncomfortable for all involved.

mscoco10

WOW- this could be a tough one. I think its all in how you say. Start very nice, like hi, how are you? Then say something like i love your dedication, i see you everyday. Next lead with you have very bad allergies or sinus issues and that perfume and strong orders make them worst and you noticed that when she works out near you have issues. Last end with it really great that's she working out and your not trying to offend her its just you want to get the best workout too.

She may not even know its that strong since no one has told her. If she's a classy lady she'll take your words in the kind spirit you give them. If she's not hopefully she'll get mad that when you arrive or she see's you at the gym she moves far away from you.

ilookthetype

I think you should move to a different machine or workout at a different time.

This...confronting her will likely not go well, no matter how "polite" you are

Sometimes you just have to suffer through, sorry.

MarySunshine70

I hate confrontation! (: This is probably passive aggressive.... but set up your elliptical with a fan between you and her & possibly wear a mask... like a doctor's mask.
An old friend of mine said that women wear make-up & perfume because they are ugly & smell bad - she's probably really insecure.
Also - I'd keep talking to management about changing their policy regarding strong smells... if the smell was bad body odor or unwashed body stink...you BET they'd change their tune. I've been to many gyms that have a policy of "no perfume" on a sign in the locker rooms - so I's sure you're not alone.

RedneckWmn

I would just politely tell her that her perfume is too strong for you and it makes you sick. I have the same problem. My Mom is worse. People don't realize when they cake their perfume and cologne on that it affects other people. I will be sick for days if it's that really strong musky perfume. You tried to talk to the staff and they couldn't help. I would just politely ask if she could not wear so much when she comes to the gym or not pick a machine right by you.

chedges9090

So, I think confronting her will not go well. And, I do understand the gym Staff not wanting to say anything . Have you tried putting some Vicks under your nose before you start working out? OR, I got some great smelling oil that is a eucalyptus/peppermint oil. Great for energy, when you need it... but, also would possibly help cover the perfume smell.

Let us know how it turns out and what you decide to do...

WifeNMama

Many public places are becoming scent free because of sensitivities and allergies. My husband is allergic to synthetic fragrance, so we encounter this a lot. You could ask if the gym would consider becoming scent free, especially since warming fragrance by exercising will definitely make it stronger. Is the woman using this machine beside you because there aren't very many to begin with?

tigersword

THe gym staff should really say something, perfume is usually against gym rules due to the potential of allergic reactions. They could be in for some serious expense if that woman happens to step up to somebody with a severe allergy who collapses and gets seriously injured because of it.

foodluver27

You could ask her what kind of perfume she wears and when she tells you what it is..tell her "I thought so I am very allergic to that perfume" and say that unfortunately you can't tolerate it. Like the lady mentioned above commend her on her hard work and dedication. Tell her you enjoy seeing her around but unfortunately you may have to steer clear due to your allergy. You could also ham it up and say you love the smell but unfortunately your allergies don't and you may break out into a rash

hardatwork45

I think you should move to a different machine or workout at a different time.

This...confronting her will likely not go well, no matter how "polite" you are

Sometimes you just have to suffer through, sorry.

I move all the time and no matter if I go really early or running late- I run into her. There are at least 20 machines there but she always picks the one directly in front of me or right next to me and she is friendly always smiles when she comes in this is why I think I'll be able to ask her about the perfume. I was just wondering if anyone had this problem before.

ladyjade68

This makes me think of when I first started working for "our" company 20 years ago, and Carl Palmer (remember him?) confronted me and told me that he was allergic to my perfume! I said to myself "who the he** is this guy?"
Anyway, maybe ask her what perfume she is wearing. It's hard though, cause I walk outside, and some people wear so much cologne that it even bothers my nose outside!!
Good luck girl!

catwrangler

Do you know where she keeps her stuff? In a locker or box at the gym? maybe leave an anonymous note?

Schwiggs

It's funny how one letter change would make this so much easier (i.e. "he" instead of "she"). I'M JUST SAIYAN!

Contrarian

There are always people at the gym who offend somebody's olfactory sense. If it isn't perfume, it is cigarette smoke, BO, last night's alcohol or just dirty gym clothes.

I think the poster who suggested rubbing a bit of peppermint oil or something under your nose has the best idea. I would still try to speak to management about implementing a no fragrance rule, though.

Good luck and let us know how it goes, because we're all pretty nosy.

Gigi_licious

I vote NO. Do not confront her. There are other areas of the gym that you can move to when she comes up beside you. So sorry if you felt like doing the elliptical, go play on the treadmill or the weight circuit, or the bikes, or the stair steppers, or the free weight area, or the stability ball.....anywhere else. Or change the time you go. I think it wouldn't solve anything to confront her, if anything it will piss her off and cause her to make it a point to come near you just to make the B who told her she stinks suffer. IMO.

MrsCon40

1. Your gym SUCKS for management's lack of balls. Yes, it is clearly bothering someone. There is no reason they can't post a "please no perfumes as some of our patrons are sensitive" at the front desk and in the locker rooms.

2. I would not mention it to her. It won't go well.

3. Change machines - and if you don't like that, change gyms and find one where management has balls and takes care of business.

Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused

Don’t confront her. Take the passive aggressive approach by eating lots of high-fiber foods, specifically, beans before a work out. Broccoli won’t hurt either. When she starts coming around wearing her overbearing perfume, start ripping mad *kitten* around her. She won’t want to come around you again.

smadrigal04

You shouldn't have to suffer...you should be able to work out without that...I agree with a previous poster about commenting on her committment, and then say that politely that you are allergic to all perfume, and it is bothering you. If someone had come up to me and told me, I wouldn't be mad...but that's just me. I would want someone to tell me if I'm offending someone!

shanolap

I would say something. Be sincere and complimentary.

SimplyFreckled

Talk to Management. My gym has a fragrance free policy, and everyone respects that.

ThePhoenixRose

A gal in my office put on a TON of body spray at her desk one day. I have TERRIBLE migraine issues and a really sensitive nose. Everyone I work with knows my headache problems, and what can result from them. I knew exactly who it was, but didn't want to make her uncomfortable. I sent an email to all the women who worked around me, asking them to simply not apply perfumes and such at their desks, as it really effects me and my ability to work. I said it doesn't matter who it was, but that i'd appreciate it if everyone could do that for me. I ended up going home shortly after that, trying to avoid the crazy migraine that was coming on.

The next day, the gal who did it came to me and apologized, saying she'd forgotten i was there. Which really is viable, since i only worked part time.

This probably doesn't help you in your specific situation though. I'd be inclined to let her know that you have a physical reaction to whatever her perfume is, and to not take it personally if you switch machines when she comes close to you. If she's a reasonable person, she's likely to just choose a machine further from you. Good luck!!!

Avalonis

Maybe I'm the only dirty mind here, but I bet she is working out close to you because has a girlcrush.

Which also explains why she is wearing the perfume... she wants to smell nice so you will talk to her.

_Timmeh_

Maybe I'm the only dirty mind here, but I bet she is working out close to you because has a girlcrush.

Which also explains why she is wearing the perfume... she wants to smell nice so you will talk to her.

I was thinking along the same lines. Keeps trying to stay close to you.
There's only one reason a guy or a girl wears cologne/perfume at the gym.
Personally I would have a talk to management again.

WoWmamaErin

The girls at the front say there is nothing they can do because she's not bothering anyone but I'm telling you I don't know what kind of skunk oil she is putting on but I was feeling sick this morning after smelling that stuff for 5 minutes.

It's clearly bothering you so maybe talk to them once again and if they are unwilling to do anything or consider going 'scent free' and have a posted policy... let them know you'll be looking for a gym that you will be more comfortable in.

kennethmgreen

Wow. Tough call. You tried to do something by talking to gym staff, and they couldn't help. That doesn't seem like very good customer service to me. I would escalate to a manager or higher if you haven't already.

I don't like the suggestion that you move your workout time. You have already tried moving to different machines. It's not OK to for someone else's stench to rape your nose. I'm sorry, but this is an issue that I get worked up over. People wouldn't hesitate to say something if it was cigarette smoke. Uh-oh.. there it is... there's that soap box...

I don't fault people's choice to fool themselves into thinking some other sentient being on the planet enjoys the overpowering fetor they have sloshed on their body. A light pleasant smell isn't bad. But there are people that will make my eyes water from 20 feet away. I know I'm olfactory sensitive, but I need to be able to CHOOSE whether to smell you. I don't want to smell you unless we are hugging, OK? That means if you are in an elevator and I cannot breathe, my only choice is to get off the elevator in a coughing fit. If you are out shopping, and we need items in the same aisle, I should be able to reach for a loaf of bread without getting a head rush like I'm at a Thompson Twins concert.

My wife hates it but if we're in the grocery store together and we encounter a walking perfume stink bomb, I will start waving my arms wildly and quickly walking away. I'm not trying to mean. I think it's mean to do that to my nose. I have moved tables in restaurants, gotten off elevators at least 10 times, and had to map out a strategy at some family gatherings where I was constantly avoiding the perfume ghost, like a ninja searching for clean air.

What were we talking about? Ok, right. The gym. Yeah, confronting people about their perfume choices is a tough one. How would you like to be confronted about your clothing choice, for instance? It's a personal thing - and having a stranger come up to you and criticize you for it can be delicate. Although, if it were me, the odds of me saying something probably hover around 40 to 1. But that's because I'm like that.

I suspect that you aren't the only person having a problem with the perfume. You could consider it your community service to take action on this. I might talk to gym management and explain to them that either they do something or you will, and it could result in a scene. Not as a threat, but that you are having a reaction to this, and it is affecting your workout. The gym staff could deal with this so much better and it be less embarrassing for everyone. I think you are dealing with a spineless gym staff.