Long distance relationships?

Kimmy546

As you know everyone on here meets people from pretty much everywhere, so what's your take on the long distance thing?
Have you tried to actually meet anyone on here and pursue more than a friendship? If so how's that working out? Just wondering as this has been propositioned to me and I'm not sure what I should do if anything. I'm not having any issues getting dates where I live, so it's totally not that! Normally I would never consider something like this, but obviously someone is standing out in the bunch. Just wondering if anyone thinks a truly committed long distance thing can work or like I said has worked. Thanks all!

Ashley_Panda

When I first met my hubby he lived 3 hours away. He would drive down every other weekend to come see me even if it was just for the day. Eventually I moved in with him.. after I graduated high school. Lol! We've been together since November 11, 2005. Married November 10, 2007 and had our son November 12, 2009.

Iamfit4life

2 years - we didn't even meet eachother for 6 months, we see eachother every 6 weeks for about 5-6 days.

I love him, he is magnificent. We have a great relationship and appreciate eachother in ways that the lucky ones who get to see eachother everyday don't.

he has plans to move here, he is fantastic to my children

and when I don't spend the day in tears because I miss him so much, I feel like the luckiest woman in the world.

It is a HUGE comittment, and requires a lot of patience, devotion and faith.

sarah44254

on this site? no. on the internet? yes. met him in 05, starting 'long distance dating' in 07, moved across the country to live with him in 08. We celebrated our 4 year 'dating' anniversary just a week ago. life is good.

I was in Ohio, he in Arizona.

espn2087

I never did, but isnt that the thing now? dating sites/networking? I see nothing wrong with it.

Jade_Butterfly

Well you don't pick who you fall in love with or how far away they live. My thought is if you fall for someone and there is a connection. there is no distance too far if that is what you really want. Why not! Wish you all the luck m'dear.

CollegeGirl19

My boyfriend and I have been in a monagamous long distance relationship for the past four years, but we have been together for five years all together. Most of that time, he was 3-4 hours away by car, but for a good 6 months, he lived in Arizona (I live in Pennsylvania). It's tough, but worth it if it's the right person. <33

AbyssIntentions

On this site, no, but on another site, yes. We met almost 2 years ago and have been together now for 7 months.

Its been difficult with more than just a few hours distance, but I don't regret it at all. I'm happier than I've ever been.

JulieBoBoo

I think there are a few factors that come into play. For one, how far away is he? If it's possible and affordable to spend the weekends together 1-2X a month (as in you live 3-5 hours away) then you have a good chance. If you're more like 12-20 hours away from each other.. not so much. If you're in the same country things have a better shot. If you're in different countries there are many more hurdles to jump. Finally how willing is one of you to relocate in the future? If you both have commitments that make moving somewhere else in the future impossible, should the relationship get serious you likely face a make or break scenario.

Now all of these things can be overcome, but if you're closer, in the same country and willing to relocate you certainly have a much better shot.

I've had two LDR. In one he fit none of the top 3 and we didn't last long. In the other he fit 2 of the top 3 and I was willing to relocate. We've been together since 2000 and married since 2002. I moved to be with him 9 months after we met online. Having said that though, my BIL (in Canada) met his wife (in Argentina) online and they are very happy together and have been together for 6 years.

blazergrad

I met my wife via the 'net and she was a 4 hour drive away when we initially met. After a year of driving back and forth (both of us) whenever possible, we got married and are coming up on our 2 year anniversary in less than 2 weeks! :happy: So yes, it can definitely work out!

AreneeG31

If someone is standing out in the crowd and you are open to it...then dont let the opportunity pass. I feel that a long distance relationship can def work if the two involved want it to. Good luck!

cmriverside

Having done the long-distance thing twice, I'd never do it again.


Someone is going to have to give up their entire life for the other. Pretty high expectations, right there.

Kimmy546

It's nice to hear it can work and so far than no one thinks it's crazy to consider. :bigsmile: You guys rock! I love the positive replies..... interested to see if any zinger replies are posted, meaning the nightmare long distance thing. I do realize it will take a lot of trust.

dragonbait0126

My husband and I did the long distance thing years ago before we got married. We had been together for a little over a year when he ended up moving 2300 miles away to go to school. We made it 3 months before we decided we didn't like it and he took the train across country to come help me pack my car and drive back to live with him. Those 3 months we missed each other like crazy but I truly believe our relationship grew stronger because of it and we completely trusted one another. We talked every day though. Honestly when it comes to a long-distance relationship I believe it's just like any other in that if it's meant to be then it's meant to be. Yes, it's work but then so are all relationships. You've just got to make time for each other whether it's talking on the phone, skyping, taking a weekend trip to see each other in person.

Iamfit4life

oh yes

If flying(or even driving a long distance) is needed..

You cannot be in a position you cannot pay for the travel

Kimmy546

I think there are a few factors that come into play. For one, how far away is he? If it's possible and affordable to spend the weekends together 1-2X a month (as in you live 3-5 hours away) then you have a good chance. If you're more like 12-20 hours away from each other.. not so much. If you're in the same country things have a better shot. If you're in different countries there are many more hurdles to jump. Finally how willing is one of you to relocate in the future? If you both have commitments that make moving somewhere else in the future impossible, should the relationship get serious you likely face a make or break scenario.

Now all of these things can be overcome, but if you're closer, in the same country and willing to relocate you certainly have a much better shot.

I've had two LDR. In one he fit none of the top 3 and we didn't last long. In the other he fit 2 of the top 3 and I was willing to relocate. We've been together since 2000 and married since 2002. I moved to be with him 9 months after we met online. Having said that though, my BIL (in Canada) met his wife (in Argentina) online and they are very happy together and have been together for 6 years.

I'm in AZ he is roughly 1800 miles away, I fly alot for work so Delta miles could get me free tickets most the time. Although I do think he would pay for the flights... money isn't an issue in the factor.

igora_soma

I've been in a few long distance relationships. Even though they didn't work for me, it's not to say they won't work for you. It depends on the people in the relationship, what they are looking for and what they are willing to contribute and/or sacrifice. If you have similar life goals and really are meant to be, then it will work

Life is for living and learning, so if you have the time/resources and interest to pursue it then go for it!

fbmandy55

My last LDR was a person I met through work, not on here but has not worked well. We gave it a try this spring/summer and when we got together for a work event, he was very distant and blew me off quite a bit. It was a challenge to be discreet because of our work relationship.. About a week or two after I got home he slowly stoped calling and things just kind of poofed.

Actually it's kind of still in the open. We've recently made another try after he called and apolpgized for the first issue and professed his feelings for me. Things picked up where they left off and it was good for a couple weeks but once again, I haven't heard from him in almost a week and I'm not going to bother. When I do he is going to get an earful and a big eff you!

sarah44254

I suppose I should add that in late 06 I was in a relationship with a man in GA while I was in OH. That didn't turn out well. It did not deter me, however, from making my next relationship a long distance one, as well.

StarGeezer

Yes, absolutely. I know several couples who met through online gaming, and the relationships have stood the test of time. One couple just celebrated their 8th wedding anniversary, and have been together over 10 years total. She was originally from Canada, he from the UK. They met playing "Everquest" together. She initially moved to England, and about 2 years ago they relocated back to Alberta. They're one of the most solid couples I know, and are still in that honeymoon-like state of being in love.

Another couple I know met playing "Ultima Online." They've been together since 2002, and married since 2003. He's in upstate New York, she originally from Arkansas before she relocated.

From this site specifically? I'm not at liberty to say...a gentleman doesn't discuss such things out of turn, but let's just say it's very possible. :bigsmile:

brittanyjeanxo

Met my SO when I was 17, started dating him 2 days later. 1200 miles apart. Moved in at a year, now a year later we're doing just fantastic. I love him more and more every day.

Cakepiebeer

unless you're married or have history together, it's a waste of time.

Kimmy546

Thanks again for sharing everyone!!!!

MikeDailyIntake

Thanks again for sharing everyone!!!!

woah wait, you're 36?? you look like you are 20 something.

ElizabethRoad

Someone is going to have to give up their entire life for the other. Pretty high expectations, right there.

People move all the time.

FitnessElle

Someone is going to have to give up their entire life for the other. Pretty high expectations, right there.

People move all the time.

It's different when you have to uproot your entire life for the sake of a relationship. Tough call, I say.

Being2befit

There isnt anything wrong with long distance....but trust is key and once u blow that trust your both will start playing with everyothers feelings. Oh and the moving thing thats a leap of faith seriously... Cause ur giving up ur life for someone u dont really know...wat if it doesnt work..

Kalrez

Someone is going to have to give up their entire life for the other. Pretty high expectations, right there.

People move all the time.

It's different when you have to uproot your entire life for the sake of a relationship. Tough call, I say.

For me, the decision to leave everything and move was pretty easy.

My BF and I met on World of Warcraft back in Oct '07. In March '08, we started talking pretty seriously. Neither of us set out to find love in a video game, but it just happened. We talked every day. We would play the game together for a few hours while talking via ventrillo (like Skype), then we'd call each other and talk on the phone for a few more hours. It really let us get to know one another without the akwardness of "are we having sex tonight? what should I wear?" I found that starting a relationship this way let me be a lot more open and upfront about who I am and what I want out of life.

We first met in person in August '08. We spent about a week together. After I went home, we would try to get together once a month or so. It was a lot of driving back and forth, but it was very much worth it. I moved to Ohio in July '09 and have been here ever since.

I was working a cool, but dead-end job back in Alabama. I was on a break from school and had moved back in with my parents. I had just gotten a divorce in which I lost all my friends. I really didn't have much keeping me in Alabama. So I took the leap and moved to Ohio to be with my BF. It has turned out so much better than I could have imagined. We have a wonderful life.

Three years and going strong

All that being said, LDRs are very, very hard. It takes a lot of trust and commitment on both sides. My BF and I had a few spats about hanging out with opposite-sex friends in certain situations. But I really think that is a normal part of relationships. It's just harder when you can't be there in person. It's hard to know that your SO is hurting or is sick but you can't be there to hold them.

I had another BF who lived in-state a few hours away. That turned out terribly. It's all a matter of who your SO is.

Good luck to you. Some of the best advice I've ever gotten is to follow your heart - it'll never steer you wrong.

Kalrez

Oh and the moving thing thats a leap of faith seriously... Cause ur giving up ur life for someone u dont really know...wat if it doesnt work..

If it doesn't work, you move back home and go back to your old life. It's not that difficult lol

mznisaelaine

I guess I would try it....but my ex-bf and met in high school. We both went to different colleges and it became a long distance relationship (which means it was challenging) ... Lol but that's all over with now... But I am open to the idea still..

Bigtime078

I met my wife via the internet, and we lived in DIFFERENT COUNTRIES at the time. I was in Germany, and she was in Kansas. I flew to Kansa to see her after we knew each other for about 3 months, and 3 months after that I married her. We are coming up on 11 years this February!