is it wrong to think i can live alone(single) all my life??

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13

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  • HeelsAndBoxingGloves
    HeelsAndBoxingGloves Posts: 916 Member
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    but what happens wen u get old?? who would b wd u then?? dat just scares me so much.... :indifferent:

    if you're that scared of being alone when you get older then being single forever probably isn't for you..... but if you're happy single right now then live it up and be open to meeting that special person when the time is right.....
  • Shanna_Inc86
    Shanna_Inc86 Posts: 781 Member
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    To each their own. No one way is right so you just do you.

    I'm a single mom, never been married and I'm not rushing to the altar. I'm ok with my little life with my little guy.

    Agree totally with this...except its my little life with my little girl :heart:
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
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    I love being alone sometimes, other times I hate it. When I dated people, sometimes I loved it, other times I hated it. :/

    You and I both....Its a love/hate thing :(
  • kyle4jem
    kyle4jem Posts: 1,400 Member
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    Some people enjoy the single life; others don't.

    I know that I cannot function on my own. I need to be part of a couple and am so happy to be married to someone I love and respect and where the feelings are mutual. (I spent 10yrs in a dead-end relationship so I really appreciate what I now have.)

    All our friends are couples too and I think we are a support system for each other too.
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
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    but what happens wen u get old?? who would b wd u then?? dat just scares me so much.... :indifferent:

    Sounds to me like something happend to make you pretty jaded at the moment. For me I love being single.. I love not having to answer to anyone, or worry about anything. I have been single so long thought that I really think I have become pretty selfish. If I never find "the one" and am alone for ever I would be completely fine with it.

    I really think its a personal preferance. But if you are scare of being alone when you are old, than perhaps be single for a while and then see what happens.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    i like to be alone.. but i also like to talk sometimes and when i do, i CAN talk. so being alone forever wouldn't work for me unless i talked to myself which i could but wouldn't be as fun.

    when you're old just go tag along with a niece or nephew.. hopefully you have money so they can really welcome you! :drinker: i'm such a problem solver!
  • spacecase76
    spacecase76 Posts: 673 Member
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    but what happens wen u get old?? who would b wd u then?? dat just scares me so much.... :indifferent:

    then--you are old alone--just like you lived your life...only older. There is nothing that says we all won't end up alone when we are old. Statistically speaking, men die before women anyway. The majority of this website can end up old and alone (because such a high percentage of us are women).

    If you are always single, no kids, no spouse, then you plan for when you are old. Pick out your own retirement home, plan your own funeral, just get everything sorted and paid for while you are young.
  • hazelnutflav
    hazelnutflav Posts: 391 Member
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    depends on the person. Some need others to be happy. Some feel better alone. Personally I like being single without having to worry about responsibilities and boundaries ... at least at the moment. There are days when I miss companionship and also the physical aspect. But most of the time I'm fine with being alone with myself. It adds a kind of freedom to my life. But over time this feeling could change. I just roll with it. Maybe, if the right person steps into your life, you will feel different again.

    ABSOLUTELY...the trick to living alone is you have to be comfortable with you, some folks are so loved starved they will accept anyone in their lives instead of just being happly alone, lets face it folks there are times when EVERYONE needs their space, some of us more than others, im single, no kids and im loving it, IF someone comes into my life thats fine i will enjoy my time with him if not thats fine too i will enjoy my time with me.
  • woou
    woou Posts: 668 Member
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    Why would it be wrong? It's your life.

    eh. My relationships seem to sizzle right at the 2 year mark. I like taking a long time alone or if I date again, I'm going to take it very, very, very slowly and not see each other often. I've had a girl once complain about seeing me about 4 times in 2 years. :laugh:
  • MrsNoir
    MrsNoir Posts: 236 Member
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    Just when I thought that myself is when my hubby appeared on scene.. that's the worst attitude to end up living alone, I was a hopeless romantic too,and I thought better alone than with any jerk or not good enough man, I am too demanding and very picky, he had to be handsome, fit, young looking although mature, blah blah blah, and most of all, I was gonna live alone anyway unless he found me... but he found me! let's blame facebook for that! :D
  • hazelnutflav
    hazelnutflav Posts: 391 Member
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    "but what happens when u get old?? who would b wd u then?? dat just scares me so much"


    hun there are no guarantees in life, everyone who is married may divorce, or loose their mate in death, or if they marry again the odds are just the same,nobody knows how your life is going to end up with or without someone.

    so how abt this? just live your life the best that you can, doing what makes you happy and fullfilled and if somewhere along the line you meet someone who makes you happy then enjoy your time together, stop worrying abt "what if?" and start living, our time here is so short before you know it you WILL BE OLD but at least you can say "oh yeah i did that, rode that ***** till the wheels fell off & laughed all the way to jailhouse".

    live long hun w/NO REGRETS!!
  • quietlywinning
    quietlywinning Posts: 889 Member
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    I have been very happily single for nearly nine years, after a 20 year BAD marriage. The first 7 years I was very sure that I would never consider marriage, or even dating, again. Friendships with guys are fine, a special friendship with one guy would be fine, but no marriage.

    Then a guy I'd known for a couple of years let me know he was in love with me and wanted to marry me. I agreed to explore the possibilities. I enjoyed him - okay I LOVED him, and actually still do. But it turns out what he wants is a wife, not a constant relationship. I was feeling like I was required to be silent and invisible unless he had nothing better to do. Not okay. For a friendship that is fine. But I am NOT sitting around waiting for the phone to ring, to be told I am loved, and I'm sure not going into a marriage where there isn't a close, comfortable, constant relationship. I love him, I want the best for him, I would do almost anything for him, except be in that kind of relationship. Marriage really is all or nothing. I pick nothing.

    I am now a bit more open to the possibility of remarrying, but I am also even more sure that I am a whole, complete person. I do need relationships, but I have and always will have relationships. I have kids, and they will always be a huge part of my life (I have good relationships with adult children) and I have great friends and work with great people. I can invite anyone into my home to visit any time I want. It's not a case of having to be in an SO relationship or having to be alone.

    Get to know you. You are a whole person. You are enough. If you're not enough alone, you'll never be enough with/for someone else. You ARE enough - you just need to experience that and see it for yourself. When you are okay with you, you will be in a better position to decide who should or should not be part of your life, and in what capacity.
  • RuchikaPal
    RuchikaPal Posts: 313 Member
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    wow...... loved to read all your comments about this... guess its not as bad as i thought :smile:

    i hope i figure put wat i want really soon...... n get out of this emotional turmoil...... :indifferent:
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,554 Member
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    Pros and cons - there are lots of great things about being single but it has it's drawbacks too.
    Personally I think the grass will always be greener on the other side!
  • PennyNickel14
    PennyNickel14 Posts: 749 Member
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    You get to have the life you choose. If you are happy single -- then good for you! :)

    Be happy, live healthy, be well
  • HollieDoodles
    HollieDoodles Posts: 678 Member
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    There's a lot of opinions out there on this...

    I used to think I should just live alone once my boys leave the house (youngest is 15 1/2). I actually thought it was better than dealing with someone else and their attitude and personality. I focused on being happy with who I was and getting to know myself for a while. Out of the blue, I discovered that there is actually someone out there that is obviously "just right" for me. Now, I don't want to live alone ;)

    IMO...If you just learn to be truly happy with yourself, then you will be happy no matter whether you end up living alone or adding a special person to your life.
  • Deathwithab
    Deathwithab Posts: 462 Member
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    i dont think there is anything wrong with it, my younger brother is dead set on never having a gf, getting married , or having kids.
    both have perks :)
  • StarGeezer
    StarGeezer Posts: 351
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    lately i've kinda been feeling that its better to live alone...... then there wont b any unnecessary responsibilities... n fights over smallest things.... no one would expect you to change urself..... isnt life better off single forever??????

    P.S. this is coming from someone who used to be a hopeless romantic....... :huh:
    Not to point out the obvious, but forever is a very long time. And you don't know exactly what the future holds or how you're going to feel about things as it does. I was in a number of "train-wreck" relationships earlier in my life, and basically took myself out of the game for over a decade. I am only just recently putting myself "back on the market", but I was quite content with my life as a single for all those years. Time goes on, we often change, and just be open to that change if and when it happens.

    Best of luck! :)
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I've been "alone" for a long time. I was in a relationship for 6 years with a guy I met in college, but 4.5 of those years were of the long-distance variety because our careers took us to different cities after graduation.

    It's been a year and a half since we broke up, and I'm still single. I have dated, but I haven't found the right man, and I have not been willing to settle for the wrong one. I do want to find love (real, lasting love, not "he's a nice guy, so I'll date for him a while and see how it goes"), but my life is not empty without it. I'm a very independent person, so being alone doesn't bother me as much as being in an unhappy relationship or an unhappy home would. But a lot of people are different. My sister is very co-dependent, and she'd rather have a less-than-perfect relationship than be alone. Even if she were single, she'd probably live with my mom and dad because she just cannot be alone.

    So you just need to be sure what kind of person you are. If you can't live a normal, healthy, fully functional life alone, then you need to get it out of your head that you can spend the rest of your life alone and start focusing on what you're looking for.

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