Hubby has been mugged and beaten by a gang of 10 *kitten*

megz4987

My fiance took the train to work (this was about a month ago) through the city (phila) to the subway. On his way to the subway, through the station, he and two others were mugged. They had to go through a tunnel to get to the subway, they had one guy walk in behind them and the othr was at the other end. The guy held a gun to each of their faces, got $250 from my fiance, the womans jewelry and the mans watch. All I could do was remind him that he did the right thing to give it up and not fight back, as they both had guns. Also to remind him it could have been worse but he was able to come home to his family at the end of the day.
He kept saying how he wanted to get a licence to carry but even if he had a gun, if he reached for it, they would have gotten him first.

I'm so sorry this happened to your husband. There's a ton of cruel and greedy people in the world but there's billions of better people.

kimtpa1417

This is horrible. I was jumped in the projects once it was 5 of them and just me. I basically hit the ground and covered what I could with my arms to block the blows. I never told anyone and when people asked about the brusies I lied and said I fell on the stairs. It is a blow to the ego because not to brag I could always hold my own so I know how he feels. report it to the authorities and pray it doesn't happen again.

DannyA0130

Sorry to hear about that. I lived in some pretty dodgy areas. I have been Jumped by a little Asian gang of crips. I was 17 at the time I was working at an amusement park still in my stupid looking clothes. Just tell him good on him for trying to fight back usually people wont because their afraid and also they know its a loosing battle. but you know what at least he hit one give him a high five. I feel more sorry than angry at gangs now a days because there just lost.

wdwghettogirl

A few years ago, my husband was working at his dad's store in a mall when a shooter came into the mall and started shooting up the place. The *kitten* was taken out by the police when they arrived, but several people were killed. Thank god my husband wasn't hurt, but a thing like that is scarring. He's much better than he used to be, but you don't forget something like that. I felt completely helpless! What made it worse, was he refused to talk to me about any of it because he wanted to protect me from what he witnessed, so he was baring this burden on his own. He finally did go talk to a therapist. Just continue to love him, support him, be there for him, try to get him to talk about it either to you or someone else, but don't push the subject. I'm so sorry this happened to your family. <<hugs>>

rebeccaME207

I'm so sorry that this happened.Thank god he will be okay! Bruises heal but there may me emotional damage done that you may want to have him talk to someone he doesnt know in case he is to embarrased to say anything to you! Im really sorry again hon! Best of luck! We all are here thinking of your husband!

LooseWheel

He will need to talk about it but as a fella - in his own time. he may not even want to talk to you or family about it as he will be worried that it's going to worry you. Our men do these things. Over time if he wants to look into self defence courses maybe, they are great for everyone to do. That's an unfair number against you. He will go through a few different moods and many might be just thinking things over, like the 'what if's' as they always come. He cant change what happened, he can let it go so it doesn't get to him but that can only be done after he's dealt with it. He should write it down and get it out if he doesn't feel like talking to anyone else. He can call the mens help lines as they are counsellors able to deal with this sought of trauma. He will want to get his confidence back and that will come with time. He will know you are there for him, but he is also going to be aware of how this is affecting you also and may not want to talk to help protect you. Dont push him to talk, just let him know you are there to just listen and are concerned for how this event is making him feel. Men sometimes dont want answers or resolve for things or the 'what ifs' from us, but just want to be able to get it out and be heard I suppose. Hope you are able to cope with this also. It is scarey for you too to have experienced something traumatic like this to the one you love. There is a protective nature there between partners. Sex is a wonderful relaxation technique, but also try body massage, low lights and the mindset he can just lie there and fall asleep. Go with the massage and see where it goes, no pressure. You know your man. It may also be such a distraction that sex isn't a goa for now, traumatic experiences can react in our bodies in a physical manner that we haven't got control over. Let him know it's a big deal he has gone through and that it will take time to deal with it thoroughly but that you are there for him. He would already know that by the sounds of things. you are a great supportive wife and sound very concerned. Here to talk or just to listen, any time for you or for your husband. Take care Louisa.

aa1440

*kitten* is a cure-all.

That makes all men happy.

serena569

It did happen to me. I was violently assaulted about 16 years ago. They also took my purse with my license and my keys and were at my house before the police even got to me. Only one of the guys was caught and he refused to talk so I was kept on a victim list for years. I was notified every time he was released from prison and every time he moved.

Time heals all wounds and I eventually asked to be removed from the victim list. Every time I received that letter, I was a victim again.

So...listen when he wants to talk and give him the time and space to heal on his own. Most important - if he doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't want to talk about it.

sunkisses

I would guess that his pride is also wounded. Getting your *kitten* beat will do that no matter how impossible the odds of winning are. I would just be mindful of that & not talk about what happened unless he wants to so he can work that feeling out in his mind. Also be kind but don't go overboard on babying. Hope he's better soon.

ohpiper

Not sure where you live, but I'd consider getttig a concealed carry permit. You can't trust that the guys won't be back and maybe do worse next time. If your husband travels the same route as part of his daily routine, he should watch out. If those guys got their kicks there once, they'll probably still be in the area. If nothing else at least get some mace.

jhardenbergh

something similar happened to me and a couple of friends when I was in High School, we were drinking booze behind the movie theater and a couple truckloads of punks from a neighboring town pulled up jumped out of the back of the trucks with baseball bats. There were a couple of us and about 15 to 20 of them. I had welts on the back of my head. I got hit with a baseball bat well at least it felt that way. I would say make him a nice meal. It could be worse, at least he doesn't have to go home to his mom and have her go crazy nuts like I had to. Treat him like a king for the next few days only talk about it if he brings it up. At least that's what I would want but everyones different.

janet_pratt

Wow! So sorry to hear this. I doubt there's much you can do to help him at this point, but I hope you reported it.

Never had anything like this happen, but we have been caught in the middle of a gang war for the last 4 months. We live in a nice middle class neighborhood and a guy moved in 4 houses down who is a prominent member of a gang. Apparently a member of a rival gang lives a couple blocks away, with his parents. So on the 4th of July, the guy who lives with his parents and another guy walked up and shot and killed a guy in the garage of the one who lives 4 doors down from me. About 1:00 in the morning. We heard it. Scared the Hell out of us. And ever since they have been doing drive by shootings between the two houses. We get woke up by gunfire a couple nights a month. I was standing by my bedroom window one morning last week, getting ready to go out and jog and I heard the gunshots again. I dropped to the floor because my bedroom in in the front of the house, and crawled around my bed into the hallway, thinking, this is a ridiculous way to live!

MrsNoir

Ah yeah, he's done that straight after the attack, police station was not too far from the attack, so they arrived even before his parents, I don't own a car and we have a small baby, so we had to stay at home and wait for him to arrive after trying to find the gang and do the statement thing.

Pamper him and call the police (or become a vigilante and take matters into your own hands)

mlbazemore

I'm so sorry to hear that...I don't know if theres anything you can do as a mans ego is very fragile whether they want to admit it or not. I think you should pamper him as been said but also let him know how brave he was and that he did all he could do given the fact that he didn't know if those punks had weapons or not, he defended himself and he has nothing to hang his head down about....I hope he feels better!

jenblowsbubblez

awee,, sheesh!!! i'm so sorry to hear that!!! just alot of pampering and hugs and kisses. Ppl are so mean!!!:/

MrsNoir

At least he's safe and alive, thinking about this gangs, they could have had knifes or something of the kind, so it was a bit stupid of him to punch one of the gang, but on the other hand he would have felt worse if he didn't defend himself. Oh dear, yeah, it must be scary to live where you live, it's such a pity you can't avoid members of gangs living in your neighbourhood. Perhaps you could raise a complaint signed by all the other residents and take them to court or something like that? but yeah, one doesn't want to get involved at all just in case they turn against you! Sorry to hear you don't even feel safe at home,:(

Wow! So sorry to hear this. I doubt there's much you can do to help him at this point, but I hope you reported it.

Never had anything like this happen, but we have been caught in the middle of a gang war for the last 4 months. We live in a nice middle class neighborhood and a guy moved in 4 houses down who is a prominent member of a gang. Apparently a member of a rival gang lives a couple blocks away, with his parents. So on the 4th of July, the guy who lives with his parents and another guy walked up and shot and killed a guy in the garage of the one who lives 4 doors down from me. About 1:00 in the morning. We heard it. Scared the Hell out of us. And ever since they have been doing drive by shootings between the two houses. We get woke up by gunfire a couple nights a month. I was standing by my bedroom window one morning last week, getting ready to go out and jog and I heard the gunshots again. I dropped to the floor because my bedroom in in the front of the house, and crawled around my bed into the hallway, thinking, this is a ridiculous way to live!

ninerbuff

So... yeah, my dear hubby just finished work at 7, and it was already dark, he always drives to work, but today he had to leave his car at the garage to be fixed, so he was walking alone in a not very well lit area,it's only a long dark street of 10 mins that would bring him into the city centre. Today one of the boys of a gang walked forward and pushed him towards the wall quite hard as he was walking, my hubby though he was just showing off so ignored them and kept going, but after another lot of two guys who didn't touch him, came a fourth guy and punched him on the face, and my hubby decided to punch back... and run, but three of them ran after him and threw him to the floor and hit him all over with punches on the face and kicks. Poor thing, when he managed to get up of the floor and escape with bruised legs, broken lip and damaged knee (he fell or was pushed against the floor and has a laceration on his left knee)

My question... has anybody experienced anything like this?, and if you were in my hubby's skin, what would make you feel better with yourself? because I really don't know how to cheer him up, besides of being extra nice, cook him dinner, and a cup of coffee and loads of hugs and kisses... but I guess sex is out of the question tonight given that he's sore in loads of place. So is there something that could make you feel better in that situation?

Not much you can do. To baby him and console him normally wouldn't do much to lessen the anger I'm sure he feels. If it were me, I'd get a police report and go back to the same area and try to identify the perps.

MrsNoir

Lol.. I'm afraid you're right.. I asked him if there was anything that could make him better, and he suggested that too! you men! I can't believe it!

*kitten* is a cure-all.

That makes all men happy.

MrsNoir

I'm so sorry to hear that...I don't know if theres anything you can do as a mans ego is very fragile whether they want to admit it or not. I think you should pamper him as been said but also let him know how brave he was and that he did all he could do given the fact that he didn't know if those punks had weapons or not, he defended himself and he has nothing to hang his head down about....I hope he feels better!

Yeah, off to bed to pamper him and try to make him feel better! and I have asked him to take the day off tomorrow to be pampered properly, as he is limping a bit on one leg, and his face doesn't look good at all, poor thing.. well, off to bed, as he's already there waiting for me! Thanks for all your replies!

vdegraff

Praying for you and your family.