Anyone with travelling spouse?

Elizabeth_C34

You need a good support system, as others have said.

Are your or his parents nearby who can help you with your childcare needs?

running_mom

OP- My husband has worked a 12 hour swing shift for our whole relationship. So he works 4 days, has 4 days off then works 4 nights. I never really saw him because he was also forced in to overtime. He was also sent for training for many months at a time. It was very hard. But I was used to a "man" not being there. My dad would travel for work months at a time. It was hard at first but I have a very loving and supportive family on both sides. He works at a refinery which scares me all the time. If one idiot forgets to close a valve all the way theres a gas leak and it could blow.

I would say find something that makes you calm down. Get into reading, art, or classes. Make sure your husband knows how you feel. He is doing everything do provide for his family. Letting him know you are worried or scared might make him feel appreciated. Plus, when he is home it will make that time even more special. And not to be a downer but you might not ever get over that feeling. But, you will find ways to get through it.

CaptainGordo

I'm not lashing out at the poster. I'm lashing out at people telling me that the British invented the language and blah, blah, blah. I happen to be married to someone who is 1/2 English and have an English last name. I respect all cultures and love to travel. I however, don't need someone throwing my point in my face and telling me "well, it's spelled this way in MY country"

This happens every day on MFP...spelling errors are pretty common on here.

I did offer up advice on the topic. In fact, I was the first one to do so.

Again, I'm not picking on the poster. I'm just angry about the person throwing the whole English language thing in my face. I pointed out a mistake...that's it.

Dude. Get over it. You've douched enough on this thread, and it's become annoying. Everyone's impressed with your spelling abilities. Move along.

I recall what someone said on another thread...

This website (and all social networks) are full of RUDE people and people that think they are better than every one else.

Oh, wait...

mleoni092708

I'm not lashing out at the poster. I'm lashing out at people telling me that the British invented the language and blah, blah, blah. I happen to be married to someone who is 1/2 English and have an English last name. I respect all cultures and love to travel. I however, don't need someone throwing my point in my face and telling me "well, it's spelled this way in MY country"

This happens every day on MFP...spelling errors are pretty common on here.

I did offer up advice on the topic. In fact, I was the first one to do so.

Again, I'm not picking on the poster. I'm just angry about the person throwing the whole English language thing in my face. I pointed out a mistake...that's it.

Dude. Get over it. You've douched enough on this thread, and it's become annoying. Everyone's impressed with your spelling abilities. Move along.

xoxoxoxo

pstaceyca

Well I have been dealing with this since my son was born...17 years ago! So I guess I am a pro. It has been quite trying at times and the main reason we only have one child. I didn't work outside the home so it was very lonely at times. My son kept me busy and meeting some great friends along the way with children the same age helped a lot. However now he is older and the hubby is still traveling, it can be lonely. Great friends and going on outing with them makes it bearable. Take the time to do things by yourself or with a friend and get a good babysitter so you don't have to worry about home when you are out enjoying yourself and destressing. If you would like to talk more you can add me as a friend if you like...I will gladly be some support because I know how hard it can be. Good luck with everything.

Hikaru37

You spelled, traveling wrong, btw.

Travelling can be spelled with two "l"s. It is the British spelling. Since they invented the language, I'm pretty sure it's okay to spell it that way.

I think I love you for this comment
Was just about to say the same thing! ^_^

Hikaru37

You spelled, traveling wrong, btw.

Travelling can be spelled with two "l"s. It is the British spelling. Since they invented the language, I'm pretty sure it's okay to spell it that way.

Well it shows up wrong on my computer. So sorry. I don't think the British invented language in general (or spelling).

They invented the English language. As someone who uses British spelling, I appreciate the extra "l" and any superfluous "u"s you have kicking around in the cupboard, as well.

You are actually my new favourite person

(Inb4 the other person gets mad I didn't spell it 'favorite')

WRONG SPELLING IS WRONG

Onesnap

All right. Enough.

My point was 100% ignored and a whole bunch of you attacked me for it.

Stop the name calling (to me). Stop accusing me of 'douching' on this post. Stop telling me how in YOUR country the word was not spelled wrong.

I pointed out that there's technology out there to make sure you do not spell things wrong (online). Firefox is free.

Seriously, people? Every single one of you that lashed out at me was completely rude. I simply said I'm sick and tired of people spelling things wrong on this website. I know it's easy to do. We are not all perfect.

Each and every one of you that was rude to me on here can just jump in a lake. I was being helpful to the poster in my first post. I spoke from experience because I'm married and I travel for work.

SabrinaJL

My husband has been in the military for 17 years. You do get used to it. Keeping busy helps.

CaptainGordo

You spelled, traveling wrong, btw.

Travelling can be spelled with two "l"s. It is the British spelling. Since they invented the language, I'm pretty sure it's okay to spell it that way.

Well it shows up wrong on my computer. So sorry. I don't think the British invented language in general (or spelling).

They invented the English language. As someone who uses British spelling, I appreciate the extra "l" and any superfluous "u"s you have kicking around in the cupboard, as well.

You are actually my new favourite person

(Inb4 the other person gets mad I didn't spell it 'favorite')

WRONG SPELLING IS WRONG

As an American, I equate the use of superfluous "u"s to being subject to a tyrannous king again.

I kid. I'm over it. Hail Britannia!

ackeebee

I am the traveling spouse. You spelled, traveling wrong, btw.

actually both spellings are acceptable!

Contrarian

All right. Enough.

My point was 100% ignored and a whole bunch of you attacked me for it.

Stop the name calling (to me). Stop accusing me of 'douching' on this post. Stop telling me how in YOUR country the word was not spelled wrong.

I pointed out that there's technology out there to make sure you do not spell things wrong (online). Firefox is free.

Seriously, people? Every single one of you that lashed out at me was completely rude. I simply said I'm sick and tired of people spelling things wrong on this website. I know it's easy to do. We are not all perfect.

Each and every one of you that was rude to me on here can just jump in a lake. I was being helpful to the poster in my first post. I spoke from experience because I'm married and I travel for work.

Your first post in this thread was jumping on the OP for her spelling. I wasn't rude to you at all. I merely pointed out that the word in question can be spelled both ways, and neither way is wrong.

The only person being rude here is you. Now, please stop making this thread about you and your hurt feelings.

The OP is coping with a difficult situation, and your efforts to derail this thread are becoming tiresome.

CaptainGordo

Seriously, people? Every single one of you that lashed out at me was completely rude. I simply said I'm sick and tired of people spelling things wrong on this website. I know it's easy to do. We are not all perfect.

My mother always taught me to pick my battles.

Is it worth pointing out to the OP? What might be gained? In this case, nothing worthwhile.

macpatti

I pointed out that there's technology out there to make sure you do not spell things wrong (online). Firefox is free. I simply said I'm sick and tired of people spelling things wrong on this website.

Please just admit you didn't need to correct anyone's spelling, and that doing so was rude. If you're so sick and tired of people spelling things wrong on this website, stick to your own wall. We all make mistakes (as you did with grammar), so I suspect you'll see it again.

To the OP~ I hope you're finding the support you need from others in the same situation. I think surrounding yourself with good friends, neighbors, family, etc is great.

Onesnap

I'm not trying to derail the thread.

Okay, my second post was offering advice.

Someone quoted me in an earlier post talking about rude people on MFP. Sadly, that person's post about rude people has been peppered with completely rude responses. Just another example of people wasting time on the forums and being horrible to each other.

I hope each of you has a lovely Thanksgiving if you celebrate.

For those of you that picked a fight with me that honesty think I was hurt or offended I was not. This is a serious topic, and I wish each of you would drop this fight and just try to help the OP.

anzabeth

Settle down! Just trying to point out that we all make mistakes. If you are going to nitpick others' posts, you should be ready to accept the fact that any errors you make are fair game!

Mallory0418

Ahem....to get back to the point....

Mallory0418

As a Navy wife, I know exactly how you feel. At times, the only thing that's kept me from losing my mind is exercise. Sweating it out is a great way to get your endorphines (sorry if that's misspelled...sigh) going and release your frustrations! The key is to keep yourself busy. Take your child for a walk or go to a park. Or find a hobby just for you. Hang in there. It does take a lot of strength to live this way but you can do it.

CaptainGordo

I Googled "coping with traveling spouse" and was surprised at how many tips there are out there. I would think that searching for advice for military spouses would be valuable as well.

Keep your chin up! :flowerforyou:

Beastette

Yes. It gets easier (for you) but harder for the kids as they get older. Which means it gets harder for you, pretty much. :-)

Support and respite are the only tips I can offer. Some YMCAs offer free child care with membership, so you can continue to work out (great for your mood) and get some quiet time in your head. It's pretty affordable, and you can meet other people to build your network.

Good luck to you, and your family.