Spouse Influence
BrandyontheRun
Posts: 204 Member
How does your spouse (or children, whoever else is in your home) influence your weight loss and eating decisions? How does the presence of someone else in your home affect your exercise routine?
My spouse (whom I love dearly) has ..to be honest.. been an obstacle in my maintaining a healthy lifestyle. I used to exercise daily and eat healthy but over the last year I have seriously fell off the wagon. I don't blame his influence at all, not in the least. But I often find it is hard to maintain with him around. Simply because i have a hard time not snacking when he does, not eating the junk and sweets that he enjoys (and I love!), and I find it distracting trying to exercise at home with another person around.
Next week we are starting the gym together, I'm hoping this helps!!
But overall I find the presence of someone else (who has no interest in healthy eating, etc) to be distracting!! It's a obstacle I am just now deciding to over come!
What are some obstacles or challenges you've faced pertaining to the people in your every day life?
My spouse (whom I love dearly) has ..to be honest.. been an obstacle in my maintaining a healthy lifestyle. I used to exercise daily and eat healthy but over the last year I have seriously fell off the wagon. I don't blame his influence at all, not in the least. But I often find it is hard to maintain with him around. Simply because i have a hard time not snacking when he does, not eating the junk and sweets that he enjoys (and I love!), and I find it distracting trying to exercise at home with another person around.
Next week we are starting the gym together, I'm hoping this helps!!
But overall I find the presence of someone else (who has no interest in healthy eating, etc) to be distracting!! It's a obstacle I am just now deciding to over come!
What are some obstacles or challenges you've faced pertaining to the people in your every day life?
0
Replies
-
bump.0
-
Ditto! But I'm aging motivation from YOU right now!0
-
My husband has always been a distraction to my fitness because of his unhealthy eating. Finally I just decided I buy the food in the house and I want him and my kids to eat healthy. There are a very few things I buy as a treat and not on a regular basis. But we mostly eat organic and very little unprocessed food. He was slightly upset in the beginning, but I pointed out to him he may eat whatever he likes everyday when he is not here or if he would like to go purchase it. He is getting adjusted and the kids were already eating pretty healthy so that's what's working for me/us.
It's very hard to not eat food that is a temptation when it's in the house. I have been working out steadily over the last 3 years and just finally made a judgement call. Good luck in your endeavors.0 -
mine is both at once actually. he helps drive me (like now for the upcoming ball he said "your going low carb no sweets till the ball and i'll support you"), but some times he will be buying me godiva, milkshakes and zaxbys chicken and asking for me to make pb cookies. so its an up n down thing. plus workouts, i can sometimes get him to walk with me, but he usually just ewant to cuddle at home. he is lucky he is naturally thin and fit. he has abs without trying.0
-
My husband is really sportive of me taking control of my health... but since he's a truck driver and doesn't eat junk food on the triad, he trends to over-do it when he's home... It's hard to keep to healthy food when he's eating chips by the bag... I've learned to keep a lot more frit and veggies in the house so I can snack on those when he's snacking on junk0
-
I find it hard as well. My husband has no interest in healthy eating or working out. It is easy to get sucked into it (and sometimes I still do) but for the most part I have now learned to just ignore it and do my own thing. I work out early in the morning (while he is still sleeping) and pack all my food myself. We eat the same main course for dinner (chicken, pork etc) but then I add veggies as a side and he will add pasta or something else. I just have to ignore him when he is eating tons of ice cream after dinner. It does get easier over time. Good luck!0
-
My husband has a sweet tooth and that interferes with my "clean" eating. I don't give in, but he's constantly tempting me with the stuff he brings home. Overall, though, he's a healthy, sexy, active man. I can't imagine myself not being with somone who is like minded in that aspect of his life.
When I work out at home my child and husband do distract me a lot! My kid does things that make me wanna yell at her from the elliptical and my husband likes to grope me or watch me when I bend over... I"m like, "I'm serious here! Quit interrupting me!!!" Sheesh!0 -
I don't let his pizza and beer lifestyle change my eating habits. I eat clean and he eats processed. I never let him influence my health for the negative. In turn, he now has salads with no offensive dressing....along with his pizza. LOL0
-
I sent you a message. Do NOT buy the junk. Think of the money you will save. My ex ate a lot of garbage. I stayed away from him when he ate it. Leave the room.0
-
I am lucky! My wife has been unbelievably supportive. She has always eaten healthier than I so as I started to eat better/smarter. It was more me eating like her rather than her habits being a discouragement to my change in life style. In addition, I am at the gym 6 days/evenings a week. This means many evenings of being alone for my wife. Although she probably enjoys the peace, quiet and full control of the TV remote. I know that after hectic days at work she would prefer that I was home in the evenings.
I am a luck guy!0 -
People we are responsible for ourselves. It is not their fault that you eat. My ex did to, I left the room. Candy, I threw it in the garbage, told him to buy me diamonds or flowersLOL He stopped with the candy.
I looked at myself in a bathing suit, in the mirror naked. I have a friend who is very thin. Her husband is quite overweight. That alone keeps her motivated. I must admit she has NENER been heavy.0 -
You look good to me!0
-
I have the opposite problem. My husband is a touch competitive, and VERY in shape. Every time I am doing great with my diet and exercise, he has to try and top it. When I started eating really healthy and losing weight, he went even more extreme with his diet and wanted to compare cholesterol numbers. He was eating uncooked oatmeal with nuts and milk every morning. He does by healthy food at the grocery store though, and makes my journey a bit easier.
His old rule used to be that he would run when it was over freezing. I was training for my first 5K, and when I went out to run and it was 7 degrees outside last year, he was impressed, but he didn't SAY he was proud of me, he said, "well if you can do it, then I can do it too, I can't let you do something I can't". I did complete my first 5K that March, but 2 weeks later he signed up for a 10K, and couldn't stop talking about it. While it's kinda funny, and healthy for him, I feel defeated and want to give up sometimes in those moments of weakness. It's hard to enjoy accomplishments when the love of your life is more interested in beating you than celebrating your success. But, I talked to him, he thought it would motivate me more I guess. In the end, I've accepted that it just makes us both healthier, and the struggles and victories I experience are mine, nobody can take that away.
Now that I do Zumba, I don't have to really worry about competition anymore, LOL0 -
My husband hates the whole gym enviornment. So all he does is go jog either 2 or 3 miles. We've started signing up for 5&10Ks together. So the exercising is there, he loves to run in these little races.
As far as eating... well he's not the healthiest eater, he can eat cheeseburgers daily. But when I do cook some healthy meals he enjoys them.0 -
I'm right there with you! My husband "the snackaholic/chocaholic' IS the enemy! There are times when I get upset cause I don't feel like I'm getting the support I need. He knows darn good and well what I allow and dont allow in my food intake, and continues to offer me the things that are on my DO NOT EAT list. I know he's just being considerate by asking, but geez! He does however praise me for going to the gym, and that he's noticed I'm shedding inches!0
-
My darling was one of my biggest cheer leaders. He was already diagnosed with liver cancer and not given a very long time by the doctors when I decided to lose weight on WW. He too was a snackaholic but I kept anything & everything in the house I could to make him happy & get him to eat. My 14yr old DGD went to all the meetings with me and was my exercise partner and I always called her my ‘head cheerleader’. He got to live long enough to have a ‘skinny’ wife for a little over a year and then after he passed I packed back on 25# - again not his fault but mine. Now I am working on getting it off again – this time for a lifetime.
We can’t blame them for our over eating but it definitely helps to have the love and support of those in your home. Now my DGD is almost 18yr & my DGS is 8yr and they are my walking partners, along with my DD, and are cheering me on with every little oz I manage to lose.0 -
I'm very lucky - my family is very supportive. This is my journey and if they want to follow that's great, if not I don't condemn them for not wanting brussel sprouts and fish for dinner. My husband eats oreos and milk every night and I sit next to him with my pudding and Redi-whip.
There are evenings that my husband will make dinner so I can take a class, never laughs when I weigh my food (he surpised me with the scale), never tries to tempt me, bought me a tv for the workout room (another surprise) and tells me I look fantastic on a daily basis. He knows I'm happier than I have been in years with myself and his motto is "Happy Wife, Happy Life"0 -
My darling was one of my biggest cheer leaders. He was already diagnosed with liver cancer and not given a very long time by the doctors when I decided to lose weight on WW. He too was a snackaholic but I kept anything & everything in the house I could to make him happy & get him to eat. My 14yr old DGD went to all the meetings with me and was my exercise partner and I always called her my ‘head cheerleader’. He got to live long enough to have a ‘skinny’ wife for a little over a year and then after he passed I packed back on 25# - again not his fault but mine. Now I am working on getting it off again – this time for a lifetime.
We can’t blame them for our over eating but it definitely helps to have the love and support of those in your home. Now my DGD is almost 18yr & my DGS is 8yr and they are my walking partners, along with my DD, and are cheering me on with every little oz I manage to lose.0 -
I truly admire you. So sorry for your loss.0
-
Just wondering, if your partner is not supporting your weight loss, does he support other things in your lifr, like interests, your job, furthering your education.
Is it possible they are insecure and are fearful you will look good and leave them?
Just wondering.0 -
I have the opposite problem. My husband is a touch competitive, and VERY in shape. Every time I am doing great with my diet and exercise, he has to try and top it. When I started eating really healthy and losing weight, he went even more extreme with his diet and wanted to compare cholesterol numbers. He was eating uncooked oatmeal with nuts and milk every morning. He does by healthy food at the grocery store though, and makes my journey a bit easier.
His old rule used to be that he would run when it was over freezing. I was training for my first 5K, and when I went out to run and it was 7 degrees outside last year, he was impressed, but he didn't SAY he was proud of me, he said, "well if you can do it, then I can do it too, I can't let you do something I can't". I did complete my first 5K that March, but 2 weeks later he signed up for a 10K, and couldn't stop talking about it. While it's kinda funny, and healthy for him, I feel defeated and want to give up sometimes in those moments of weakness. It's hard to enjoy accomplishments when the love of your life is more interested in beating you than celebrating your success. But, I talked to him, he thought it would motivate me more I guess. In the end, I've accepted that it just makes us both healthier, and the struggles and victories I experience are mine, nobody can take that away.
Now that I do Zumba, I don't have to really worry about competition anymore, LOL0 -
No offense but if he is so unsupportive and competitive, why is he "the Love of your Life"...I don't get it. Is that not part of love, being there for one another in all aspects of life. Not trying to compete and beat the other person down. I am not capable of handling that. Either you are my partner or you are not.0
-
im doing carb cycling high calorie. My fiance is meat and taters. My mom is on low calorie. Nobody eats the same thing and it gets exhausting sometimes (not to mention i want to bite gregs arm off for his garlic toast). Greg also has a habit of never having much to talk about until im dripping sweat in the middle of a workout. I just tell him "dinner in 30, wait until then."0
-
Boyfriend is not supportive or happy about me trying to be healthy. He is like the opposite of a vegetarian, he has to have some kind of meat with every meal, unless it is a the big bag of doritos and humous snack
. But he has started to change a bit this year because he put on weight after quitting smoking)
Plus he is unhappy I want to log my foods, he also complains I spend too much time exercising. I told him my goal is to look a bit athletic (lower bodyfat a few %) but he seems to think I'm going to become anorexic.0 -
My husband is for the most part supportive. He's not much of a junk food person either so if there's junk food in the house it's because of me, which has become less and less often. He loves me the way I am but would love to see me at a healthier weight as well. I can't stand exercising at home with an audience though so I joined a gym and try to get there 3 days a week, my husband actually has taken on watching the kids so I can do this but this last week has been hard because in WI deer hunting is a BIG thing and nothing can come between hunters and the possible kill (I still don't understand what is so fun about climbing trees and shooting deer) so he hasn't been home for me to go. My daughter loves going for walks and doing anything outdoors so she is very helpful in getting me going. She also loves fruits and veggies so making meals that she's happy with is quite simple as far as my husband being happy with the meal if he doesn't like or want what I make he knows where the kitchen is. My work is the most unsupportive when it comes to healthy eating so this is where I have the most problems with eating healthy. They say it's fine to have a candy bar or chips at our desk but fruits and veggies are too messy and can stink the place up...I eat them at work any ways.0
-
I also found it much easier to maintain a healthy weight when I was living alone. I ate what I wanted and had plenty of time to exercise. Now we have "dinner" every night. No more just having a bowl of cereal or popcorn when I'm not very hungry. And it's so much more enjoyable to sit on the porch and relax with a glass of wine and my husband than to exercise and get all sweaty. Especially when it gets dark so early that there is not time for both.0
-
I love all the inspirational messages on this thread. I don't meant to put a damper on things, but the dark truth is that often times, when spouses are not on the same page as you, they see your progress as a threat. The may suffer from profound self-esteem issues, and they sub-consciously sabotage your progress because if you stay fat, you are less likely to leave them. This is a gross generalization, and I know not all spouses do this, but it is a sad fact. I have found some push back with my spouse. I just have accepted that no matter what the temptation, I am the only one responsible for what I put in my mouth and whether or not I get off my butt and move. It then changes to acceptance, and then, if you can be patient, pride.
Just keep in mind that you are responsible and you have the power, and if your spouse is not on board, it is not because he or she does not love you, you just have to show them with your actions that this is the way it is. And who knows, he or she might surprise you one day. My wife, for example, introduced me to MFP.
Keep up the good work.0 -
I love all the inspirational messages on this thread. I don't meant to put a damper on things, but the dark truth is that often times, when spouses are not on the same page as you, they see your progress as a threat. The may suffer from profound self-esteem issues, and they sub-consciously sabotage your progress because if you stay fat, you are less likely to leave them. This is a gross generalization, and I know not all spouses do this, but it is a sad fact. I have found some push back with my spouse. I just have accepted that no matter what the temptation, I am the only one responsible for what I put in my mouth and whether or not I get off my butt and move. It then changes to acceptance, and then, if you can be patient, pride.
Just keep in mind that you are responsible and you have the power, and if your spouse is not on board, it is not because he or she does not love you, you just have to show them with your actions that this is the way it is. And who knows, he or she might surprise you one day. My wife, for example, introduced me to MFP.
Keep up the good work.0 -
Ya!!!0
-
I am thankful that my husband and I started on our getting fit journey together. We make out our food menu and grocery shop together. He is actually better at sticking to the plan than I am and he helps me when I feel down. We do our workout at 5am and without him I would never have stuck with it as long as I have. He makes sure I get out of bed and while I am dressing, he is making my protein shake. I am so thankful to have him as a partner!0
This discussion has been closed.
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 393.4K Introduce Yourself
- 43.8K Getting Started
- 260.2K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.9K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.5K Fitness and Exercise
- 426 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.5K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 153K Motivation and Support
- 8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.7K MyFitnessPal Information
- 24 News and Announcements
- 1.1K Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.6K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions