Awful, horrible, miserable day.

ccano

I know I've said it a million times here already, but...as of Wednesday, my husband will have been gone a month. He's in Iraq. I talk to him everyday, he has email access so I can write him emails, but...

I am miserable. I had an absolute breakdown last night and again today. Usually I am fine and I get through my days with small pangs of loneliness and sadness here and there, but last night and today I am having a full blown breakdown.

I need him home. Why do things have to be this way? I need my husband more than the military does.

*huge sigh* :frown: :brokenheart:

ccano

I know I've said it a million times here already, but...as of Wednesday, my husband will have been gone a month. He's in Iraq. I talk to him everyday, he has email access so I can write him emails, but...

I am miserable. I had an absolute breakdown last night and again today. Usually I am fine and I get through my days with small pangs of loneliness and sadness here and there, but last night and today I am having a full blown breakdown.

I need him home. Why do things have to be this way? I need my husband more than the military does.

*huge sigh* :frown: :brokenheart:

Dave198lbs

I I need my husband more than the military does.

*huge sigh* :frown: :brokenheart:

is that really true? it may seem that way ..but...
think of the good things....
you can see and write and read and are in doors with running water...it could be worse and he is doing a service for all of us
hang in there

GIBride01

He has been gone a month and only one total meltdown...you are doing great as far as I am concerned. My hubby retires in 6 months after 20 years in the Army, I have been with him for the past 10..so BTDT, let me tell you. Seriously, if you are up and about and working and working out and eating and sleeping...you are doing great. You are going to have meltdowns now and then, hello..your husband is gone, it would be abnormal for you to NOT have meltdowns. I know there are all kinds of things people say to do to make you feel better, but it sucks no matter what you do. They only thing that will fix the suckiness of it all is your man being home. So chin up girly girl..it takes a strong man to be in the Army...takes a stronger woman to back him up. He will be home soon, have a pity party with a few of your girlfriends,,,a few glasses of wine,,,and that is one more day closer to him being home. :flowerforyou:

thejarviclan

Awwww!

This is all just a journey...the weight loss, the deployment. And meltdowns are a part of that. (I'd be more worried if you didn't melt down!)

You're strong! You're as strong as you need to be. Every day brings you one step closer.

I'm thinking of you and your husband, and so very grateful for both of your sacrifices.

marisa0918

I can't even imagine what it would be like. I give credit to all the military families and thanks to all the military!!

ChubbyBunny

You can do this, I know it's hard.

MisoSoup79

I agree with everything said by the previous posters! I too am a military "significant other." My fiance left on Jan 2 and we also have email contact daily. It is VERY hard being separated from the one person in the world who means everything to me.... but this is not the first time we've done it, and it won't be the last! In 2006/07 I was the one deployed! I was gone for 8 months... and it was tough, but we made it through. After all was said and done, it didn't seem like such a long time had passed. And this, too, will pass in time.

There are days where I wake up pitying myself for being lonely. But then I have to kick myself in the butt and thank my lucky stars that this is just temporary. He is not gone forever. In the meantime, I'm working to change my body and change my attitude so he comes home to a happier, healthier woman! I cry some nights because it sucks being in that big comfy bed all by myself. And some days I wonder what's the point of even getting out of bed? But he wouldn't want me to feel this miserable, and I don't want me to feel miserable.

If you know his estimated return date, you can make a paper chain with a link for every day he will be gone. At the end of the day, just before bed, break one link and throw it away. Another day down... another day closer to that happy reunion!

I wish you the best and I wish there was more we could do to make the time pass quicker. Thanks for being there for him. Your support matters to him more than you know. It's just as hard being the one over there as it is being the one over here waiting...

briblue72

I thank you for your tremendous sacrifice for our country and everyone in it.

I'm sorry it's not easier. My only advice is to lean on other military wives for their support.

Much love. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

mommared53

Ccano, I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time being without your husband. I know this is no consolation to you but I just want you to know how thankful I am for his service to our country. Hang in there and be strong. You're not alone in what you're going through. God bless you and your husband. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Betty

twoody

Praying for you! :flowerforyou:

ccano

I I need my husband more than the military does.

*huge sigh* :frown: :brokenheart:

is that really true? it may seem that way ..but...
think of the good things....
you can see and write and read and are in doors with running water...it could be worse and he is doing a service for all of us
hang in there

Yes, it really is true. I do need him more. I haven't encountered many people who like it when I say that, but I don't care how selfish I sound. I do need my husband more than they do.

Sometimes I feel like wearing a shirt everyday that says "DO NOT MESS WITH ME, MY HUSBAND IS DEPLOYED."

ccano

He has been gone a month and only one total meltdown...you are doing great as far as I am concerned. My hubby retires in 6 months after 20 years in the Army, I have been with him for the past 10..so BTDT, let me tell you. Seriously, if you are up and about and working and working out and eating and sleeping...you are doing great. You are going to have meltdowns now and then, hello..your husband is gone, it would be abnormal for you to NOT have meltdowns. I know there are all kinds of things people say to do to make you feel better, but it sucks no matter what you do. They only thing that will fix the suckiness of it all is your man being home. So chin up girly girl..it takes a strong man to be in the Army...takes a stronger woman to back him up. He will be home soon, have a pity party with a few of your girlfriends,,,a few glasses of wine,,,and that is one more day closer to him being home. :flowerforyou:

20 years in the Army...:flowerforyou: My dad retired after 20 years in the USMC. Thank you for relating to me and not making me feel bad for my meltdown. Being a Marine brat, I knew what I was getting myself into when I married my Marine. I even knew he was deploying. But love doesn't always strike you at the most convenient times, does it? I have to say though, I am thrilled to be his wife. We have been married a month and a half now...yep, we got hitched 2 weeks before the deployment.

Today, just as I was in the midst of my meltdown, a bouquet of red roses (arranged like a bridal bouquet, which was just amazing since I haven't had my big wedding ceremony yet...we're planning it for next year) was delivered to my front door along with a teddy bear and small box of chocolates. I could hit him for the chocolate thing, but...right now, on this god awful day, I'm going to enjoy one delicious little piece of chocolate. I love him.

ChubbyBunny

How you deal with..."this" is your own choice.
My fiance has been deployed for 5 months to Iraq.
I am not going to lie and say it gets easier....cause it doesn't and sometimes it comes out of nowhere.
One thing I am learning is that I can't let "my issues" with his deployment affect his performance on the job. There have been times it has. I knew going in to this the price I would have to pay for the price he chose to pay by being a soldier.

However you deal, it's your own thing.
Someways are more productive then others though.
:flowerforyou:

ccano

I agree with everything said by the previous posters! I too am a military "significant other." My fiance left on Jan 2 and we also have email contact daily. It is VERY hard being separated from the one person in the world who means everything to me.... but this is not the first time we've done it, and it won't be the last! In 2006/07 I was the one deployed! I was gone for 8 months... and it was tough, but we made it through. After all was said and done, it didn't seem like such a long time had passed. And this, too, will pass in time.

There are days where I wake up pitying myself for being lonely. But then I have to kick myself in the butt and thank my lucky stars that this is just temporary. He is not gone forever. In the meantime, I'm working to change my body and change my attitude so he comes home to a happier, healthier woman! I cry some nights because it sucks being in that big comfy bed all by myself. And some days I wonder what's the point of even getting out of bed? But he wouldn't want me to feel this miserable, and I don't want me to feel miserable.

If you know his estimated return date, you can make a paper chain with a link for every day he will be gone. At the end of the day, just before bed, break one link and throw it away. Another day down... another day closer to that happy reunion!

I wish you the best and I wish there was more we could do to make the time pass quicker. Thanks for being there for him. Your support matters to him more than you know. It's just as hard being the one over there as it is being the one over here waiting...

You are so right, one day down, one day closer. If I made a paper chain it would be unbelievably long since he is not due back until next January. He comes home on combat leave this summer, which I am absolutely beyond excited for. He'll be back either in June or August. Then we'll be halfway through this stupid year.

Thank god this will be the first, last, and only time we go through this. He gets out the year after he returns, so they won't be able to send him again before then. *huge sigh of relief*

When is your fiance due back?

MisoSoup79

Thank you for relating to me and not making me feel bad for my meltdowns.

Nobody here is trying to make you feel bad :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: We just want to be here for you and support you in ways we can... I'm sorry if my comment or anyone else's comment seemed harsh... it's not meant to be! :flowerforyou: :explode:

ccano

Thank you for relating to me and not making me feel bad for my meltdowns.

Nobody here is trying to make you feel bad :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: We just want to be here for you and support you in ways we can... I'm sorry if my comment or anyone else's comment seemed harsh... it's not meant to be! :flowerforyou: :explode:

No no no, it wasn't you. Was I slightly irritated by Dave's response? Yes. But no, yours was very nice.

ChubbyBunny

Again, open forum.... you will get a plethora of responses....
Even the ones you don't like.

I hope you get to feeling more like yourself soon.
:flowerforyou:

MisoSoup79

I agree with everything said by the previous posters! I too am a military "significant other." My fiance left on Jan 2 and we also have email contact daily. It is VERY hard being separated from the one person in the world who means everything to me.... but this is not the first time we've done it, and it won't be the last! In 2006/07 I was the one deployed! I was gone for 8 months... and it was tough, but we made it through. After all was said and done, it didn't seem like such a long time had passed. And this, too, will pass in time.

There are days where I wake up pitying myself for being lonely. But then I have to kick myself in the butt and thank my lucky stars that this is just temporary. He is not gone forever. In the meantime, I'm working to change my body and change my attitude so he comes home to a happier, healthier woman! I cry some nights because it sucks being in that big comfy bed all by myself. And some days I wonder what's the point of even getting out of bed? But he wouldn't want me to feel this miserable, and I don't want me to feel miserable.

If you know his estimated return date, you can make a paper chain with a link for every day he will be gone. At the end of the day, just before bed, break one link and throw it away. Another day down... another day closer to that happy reunion!

I wish you the best and I wish there was more we could do to make the time pass quicker. Thanks for being there for him. Your support matters to him more than you know. It's just as hard being the one over there as it is being the one over here waiting...

You are so right, one day down, one day closer. If I made a paper chain it would be unbelievably long since he is not due back until next January. He comes home on combat leave this summer, which I am absolutely beyond excited for. He'll be back either in June or August. Then we'll be halfway through this stupid year.

Thank god this will be the first, last, and only time we go through this. He gets out the year after he returns, so they won't be able to send him again before then. *huge sigh of relief*

When is your fiance due back?

I am afraid I got a better bargain... my sweetie is Air Force and his deployment is only 120 days... Lucky for me. We are getting married in June...

But he signed on for another four years and I am currently looking into the possibility of getting back in. So I'm sure there will be at least one more deployment... possibly more.

I know I can't quite relate to you in terms of how long you'll be separated... but I do hope you find strength on your good days and don't let your bad days get you down too much. :flowerforyou:

ccano

Again, open forum.... you will get a plethora of responses....
Even the ones you don't like.

I hope you get to feeling more like yourself soon.
:flowerforyou:

And I responded to him with how I felt. Open forum.

ccano

How you deal with..."this" is your own choice.
My fiance has been deployed for 5 months to Iraq.
I am not going to lie and say it gets easier....cause it doesn't and sometimes it comes out of nowhere.
One thing I am learning is that I can't let "my issues" with his deployment affect his performance on the job. There have been times it has. I knew going in to this the price I would have to pay for the price he chose to pay by being a soldier.

However you deal, it's your own thing.
Someways are more productive then others though.
:flowerforyou:

I am struggling with learning how to keep my sadness at bay when I talk to him. If I talk to him 7 days a week, I cry on the phone at least 3 of those days. That has been my biggest problem with that so far. And it's not like, sobbing and being completely over the top. I just get teary-eyed and choked up. I'm still trying to figure out how to put that in check when I talk to him, because I know he considers me his source of escape at the end of his long days. I have never been through this before, but I am trying. Very hard.