Need advice on a situation I have never been in before

springfield5780

No real advice, but I do know how you feel. I had been friends with a girl for about 10 years then one day she stopped talking to me. She was over-seas and we were emailing back and forth then she stopped. She won't reply to any of my messages or anything. It was just over a year ago and I'm still hurt. It is hard. I constantly kept racking my brain trying to figure out what I could have done/said. There was no fight or even disagreement. Maybe it wasn't something I had done, but something I didn't do/say? Maybe it has nothing to do with me.....Maybe she had issues and couldn't cope so she felt the only answer was for us to not be friends. I'll probably never know. I hope things work out or you at least get answers.

I have come to realize maybe we weren't as good of friends as I thought otherwise she would have at least given me some sort of explanation. I sent her one last text to tell her I missed her friendship and left it at that. My door is still open to her. I know her past and her habits, how she deals with things so maybe one day we will come across each other and I can get an answer. ((hugs)) to you!

I know how you feel too! I had a BFF (I thought LOL) that quit talking to me because a mutual friend confided in me that she was pregnant. She didn't want the whole world to know and asked me to keep it quiet. I did. When she decided to share the news it came out that I knew all along...she never spoke to me again. Craziest stuff I have ever been through in my life. She spread vicious rumors about me all over town....can we say psycho?! Usually gossiping gets you in trouble...I got in trouble for NOT gossiping LOL but then she told anyone that would listen that I talked about them behind their back. I truly hurt me to my core. It was so sudden and in my opinion just so unfair for her to expect me to tell everyone's business to her. She wouldn't want me telling all of hers!

Women are just weird sometimes! Me and my friends will go days not speaking and then speak for several days then not speak. Not intentionally ignore one another just busy with life :flowerforyou:

BloomingLily

Chances are that it IS about you. Since you stated she's ignored calls/texts/FB posts - AND - she's responding to others. She's getting theirs and chosing to ignore yours. Since you indicated you've had rough patches before, this is probably another one.
You've known her long enough to know if this is typical behavior for her or not. IEither way, nothing you can do to force it.
Send her 1 more voice mail msg - tell her you enjoyed the trip, happy for her new life. Let her know you figure she's probably busy, yet you're getting the feeling she's not speaking to you. You apologize for whatever you did - even if you really don't know what that was - and hope that she'll honor your friendship and let you know what that issue was.
This will be your last attempt to contact her, and when she's ready to open up and let you know what the issue is, hopefully you can fix it and move on, so you can continue your friendship.
Then let it go. It's in her court. You can't fix what you don't know is broke, and frankly, if she's THAT insensitive and immature that she can't respond with - "this is what you did, or what happened and I'm upset"....then I'd ask you if this is a person worth the time and effort.

I agree with this. If my friend took the time, money, etc to go to Mexico to be in my wedding, I would take the little amount of time it takes to respond to a message and let her know what's up. In fact, I would have the decency to do it even if she didn't come to my wedding simply because she is a friend. I know it isn't what you want to hear, but she might be doing you a favor. Don't become obsessed with it. Move on and enjoy life. If she contacts you, you will know what YOU want to do.

kappyd

Maybe she really isn't upset and just busy being married? If she has never been upset with you before, and there is no reason for it now, it's probably not ok to assume she is upset.

FYI: Nothing annoys me more than when my best friend asks, "Are you mad at me?" when I'm just busy or not feeling like talking.

x10

Who gets to busy to answer a text. Even if it is just to say, I am busy talk to you later.

Tangerine302

Well no matter what you did or didn't do, I think it's is just sooooo rude of her to play this game. You agreed to be in her wedding and in comes with the expense to travel to there, etc. She doesn't seem to be mature enough to give you an answer. Sometimes people or brides think of it as a me,me, me world. I hope she does better in her marriage as it no longer is all about her, but a mutual thing.
Sorry she is being this way. Just sounds selfish and immature to me. Hope things work out.