People mad at you for being successful.....

FirewifeCarrie

Over the past year I have lost a total of 35 pounds. Throughout my journey I have posted my progress on Facebook. I would do it about daily (at least at first) and usually update my progress every few days. I would usually say what I did (run, cardio, kickboxing, etc..) and how many calories I burned. I started hearing negativity about people being annoyed that I kept posting things like this on FB...hello???it's a public site and I can say whatever I want!
I didn't let it stop me though. I had a lot of people becoming inspired to get fit because of my success. Now I felt like I HAD to report what I was doing. These postings eventually lessened as the year went on, but I do occasionally still post something.
I just read something that really fired me up again and it was from my cousin of all people!!! In his blog he talked about how annoyed he was at people who post how many miles they run, how many calories burned, how long they kickbox for, etc... I know that this was directed at me whether or not he meant for me to read it or not. I knew that the criticism I was receiving came from my cousins and my sister, but reading this just really irked me.
Anyone else had this same experience? It wasn't like I was telling people to go out and exercise, it was basically a way to hold myself accountable! I just hate it when the people that are supposed to have your back for anything are annoyed at my success.
Okay..I just had to vent. I feel much better!

Rayman79

I completely get this. This is why I spend time on here, lots of encouragement and support - no judgement or ill feeling.

I feel like there are somethings I don't want to share with family or friends as I don't want to feel like I'm constantly talking at them about my work at the gym or weight loss etc, so I come on here!

Lyadeia

I haven't felt that kind of thing from family, but I have have felt it from other people on Facebook. I had one @ss tell me about how he doesn't need to exercise and he can eat 3000 calories a day and still lose weight. He would comment on everything I posted about my success just to try to make my successes look like nothing. Needless to say, he is not longer on my Facebook, and he has been totally blocked...just don't need people like that around me!

There are a lot of fitness oriented people on Facebook. It sounds like you just need to reach out and find some friends to help keep you motivated and accountable. But I can say that I know just how you feel because even though we have the right to post what we want...so do they, and negativity abounds when people have success stories and have reached goals. Sucks, but true.

FirewifeCarrie

The thing is that most of my friends on FB, or at least the ones I communicate with on a regular basis..are supportive. It's my family that's not, lol! I'm the baby of the family and I think everyone has always looked at me like I don't know what I'm doing since I'm the youngest. I should rephrase this...it's my sister and my 2 cousins that are not supportive and they are the ones that always treat me like I'm stupid.
Good thing I have a positive attitude and know who in my family I can talk to..I guess next time I post anything I'll block them out of it, lol!

Kany

I haven't gotten any negativity from people. I don't post my weight loss goal or exercise on Facebook though. I would post about going mountain biking every week on FB but still no negative comments. This is the reason why I got on MFP. For those people who are annoyed of your posts, they can always choose to block it. Why bother reading something that is just going to get under your skin right.

kymdarnell

it is total jealousy - that is why they say whay they say or do what they do - dont let it get to you - take it as a compliment that they are jealous of YOU....be proud and also if they don't want to read it they can just unsuscribe your updates etc.....

fiberartist219

I had a coworker tell me that she hates my team lead because she's pretty.

I asked her if she would hate me too when I lost the weight.

She said yes.

I don't care though. I'm not doing this for her. I'm doing it for myself.

We are all happy for you, and as long as you are happy too, who gives a crap what your family thinks? If they are self-conscious about their own weight, there is no reason for them to drag you down. Either they get on board, or they just sit back and congratulate you. Sitting back and talking trash is not an option, and you need to let them know that.

Devonanne

I haven't experienced this personally but I feel for you! I don't use Facebook much anymore, but it seems beyond ridiculous that a person has to put up with zillions of meaningless updates from people saying that "so and so bought a cow in Farmville" etc or "Man I'm so hungover", but has to suffer backlash from updating people on their healthy lifestyle choices! Makes no sense.

annabellj

it is total jealousy - that is why they say whay they say or do what they do - dont let it get to you - take it as a compliment that they are jealous of YOU....be proud and also if they don't want to read it they can just unsuscribe your updates etc.....

so this!

BobbyClerici

WELCOME TO THE HUMAN RACE!

It's a fact that most people prefer to gloat over our misfortunes than celebrate in our achievement.
It's a rare person who can really be happy for another who has realized success.

And what is my solution to this?
I make sure those sniveling, toxic losers get drenched in the knowledge of my wealth and happiness.
The best revenge is to live well and just be happy.

FirewifeCarrie

I haven't experienced this personally but I feel for you! I don't use Facebook much anymore, but it seems beyond ridiculous that a person has to put up with zillions of meaningless updates from people saying that "so and so bought a cow in Farmville" etc or "Man I'm so hungover", but has to suffer backlash from updating people on their healthy lifestyle choices! Makes no sense.

I really LOLed on this one!

OriginalWhatTheHelen

Don't let it bug you. If someone doesn't think what you've accomplished is a big deal, so be it. Keep doing what makes you feel good about yourself. I'll keep posting my check-ins to "CHOP" because, as you said, it helps me stay accountable. I know there are many who don't care and lots who think I'm a nut (because they've told me so), but I also know that there are more than a few people who notice when I DON'T check in because they ask me about it.

Be proud of what you've accomplished and keep sharing your enthusiasm whenever you feel the urge. I would suspect there are more people you've effected positively than negatively.

Helen

mmuzzatti

it is total jealousy - that is why they say whay they say or do what they do - dont let it get to you - take it as a compliment that they are jealous of YOU....be proud and also if they don't want to read it they can just unsuscribe your updates etc.....

Agree whtat's why I only post my progress and my downfalls here!

paulaGetshealthy

If I post stuff about my weight loss on fb, I make sure I don't post very often. People get annoyed by it because it seems like we're showing off and acting superior to everyone else. I know that's not the case, but still. It's annoying when we always talk about the same thing to people who are not interested. That's why I use this site to talk alllllll I want about my weight loss.

FirewifeCarrie

I've also had a few co-workers say snide little things to me....most say really nice things but it's the others that actually make me almost feel bad about losing weight...almost, lol! It's just hard for me to understand how people can be like this because I am totally the opposite. I usually go out of my way to make others feel good about themselves and proud of their accomplishments. I haven't let it get to me but when I read my cousin's blog it really got to me.
This is another reason why I love my MFP family! Thanks guys..and girls;)

nalliebell

I take it as jealously and envy. I try and motivate everybody that I come into contact with but miserable ppl will be miserable ppl. The support on mfp is AMAZING!!! To be supported by complete strangers with a common goal is wonderful and sad when family and close supposed friends have nothing positive to say.

FirewifeCarrie

Don't let it bug you. If someone doesn't think what you've accomplished is a big deal, so be it. Keep doing what makes you feel good about yourself. I'll keep posting my check-ins to "CHOP" because, as you said, it helps me stay accountable. I know there are many who don't care and lots who think I'm a nut (because they've told me so), but I also know that there are more than a few people who notice when I DON'T check in because they ask me about it.

Be proud of what you've accomplished and keep sharing your enthusiasm whenever you feel the urge. I would suspect there are more people you've effected positively than negatively.

Helen

Helen you are the best! Without you I wouldn't have even known about MFP! I'm not going to stop posting my successes and if someone's jealous then maybe it means they should get up and do something about it...I would even offer my help!

nukehiker

I feel your pain, i have no at home support from my so called wife etc.... oh well i'm doing this for me.

BobbyClerici

it is total jealousy - that is why they say whay they say or do what they do - dont let it get to you - take it as a compliment that they are jealous of YOU....be proud and also if they don't want to read it they can just unsuscribe your updates etc.....

Agree whtat's why I only post my progress and my downfalls here!

I have a fat friend who could have been my twin 2 years ago.
We were both Italian fat guys who loved to eat, drink and eat. And eat...lol
Both bald, same height - getting the picture?

But I lost 64 lbs...

He barely will even speak to me these days. It drives him crazy. So, I made sure to post my latest pics on his FB page and not a word. He's just seething with envy!

I LOVE IT!

Nikki582

Thank you.

Thank you thank you.

I have a "friend" on twitter comment, not long after I said something about an awesome run I did, that she hates how people keep on posting about exercise and going to the gym and stuff, it's boring and she goes tot he gym but chooses not to brag about it.

And I replied something like "Sorrrrrrrry" but I haven't stopped, I had slowed - based on her opinion. I say thank you, though, because you've made me realise the for her one piece of negativity I've had two people tell me they're motivated and inspired by me - and how many more that haven't said.
WHy did I let her negativity get to me? It's my twitter, she can hit the unfollow button. I'm damn proud of what I do and that I inspire others.

Anyway, keep it up!

lor007

Did you ever consider that those people were annoyed by the repetitive posts, not mad or jealous?

katyejean

I haven't had this experience, but if I did, I would tell them that if they didn't like it, they can just not read it, or delete me. It's MY facebook, and I can say what I want. I wouldn't dread on it. You got some people inspired! Great job on that and your success!

alabughosh

I'm JUST playing devil's advocate here to look at both sides (don't kill me). But I can understand why some people would be (slightly) annoyed. Its the same thing as if someone posted a camera photo of their tuna sandwich everyday. Or if you take a picture of your cereal each morning. It's redundant? I can TOTALLY understand that each time you work out you feel proud of yourself and like you accomplished something....I feel the same way. And my husband is a TOTAL sweetheart, congratulating me every time. I swear every day I workout, when he gets home from work I say "I worked out today!" and he says something like "wow, sweetie, that's great!" even though I know its becoming old news.

I'm SO obsessed with my diet. I love to talk about it, I want to tell everyone about the clever ways that I managed to cut calories on certain dishes.....but that's what my MFPs are for! I know that they TRULY are interested and I'm interested in what they are doing too.

BPayton27

I have also encountered this. One girl in particular has basically stopped associating with me now that I am living a much healthier lifestyle. I used to think it was coincidence, but now I feel it may be envy or jealousy. Her husband is in a fight club. She says she "trains," but I have never witnessed any noticable weight loss of hers (not that I would EVER say that). When she saw I was clearly losing weight without me even talking about it, she got short with me and now we don't even speak.

To hell with that. Whatever! Those are not the type of people we need in our lives anyway. Be proud of your hard work and accomplishments. If you want to talk about it to inspire people, why not?

Gharley64

They could kiss my LESS FAT *kitten*!
Funny how people that cannot muster up the drive to do what we are doing find it easier to knock others rather than pick it up.

OriginalWhatTheHelen

I've also had a few co-workers say snide little things to me....most say really nice things but it's the others that actually make me almost feel bad about losing weight...almost, lol! It's just hard for me to understand how people can be like this because I am totally the opposite. I usually go out of my way to make others feel good about themselves and proud of their accomplishments. I haven't let it get to me but when I read my cousin's blog it really got to me.
This is another reason why I love my MFP family! Thanks guys..and girls;)

Let the negative go in one ear and out the other. Just keep doing what you do (quietly leading by example). And, just as your cousin doesn't have to read your status updates...you don't have to read his blog.

65PONY

I found a lot of friends are jelous of the success...just their coping mechanism so they make excuses for their weight...No more excuses for me....I'm with you I don't care who does not like the attention, but guess what you earned it! Enjoy & be Proud of it!

Cheers, Joe

Keep the Focus & Finish Strong!

Sharon009

I only post fitness stuff on mfp and mfp's facebook wall. I've found that being successful at eating healthy and losing weight convicts others who feel they should being doing something but arent. But sometimes people do get tired of others constant facebook postings, I know during election season people have 'hide' my posts and told me about it, they got tired of reading my opinions ;-) They told me because I posted something these two people needed to know and they didnt see it prompting them to tell my why. Haha, it was kinda funny.

Dont take it personally, I know that's difficult to do especially since its your family and they should be on your side.

Jorra

I would get annoyed if someone posted the same things almost every day regardless of the topic. I don't think they are mad at your success, they are mad at your annoying Facebook habits.

You could show them how to hide Facebook posts from particular users. I would hide someone who acted like that.

Nailrep

VERY sad that supposed friends and ESPECIALLY family members can't be happy for you. Ugh. Just makes me sick!!

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

Probably they're either jealous, too lazy or feel uncomfortable when talking about fitness stuff. But their immaturity speaks for themselves since as their cousin or sister, they should blurt out their feelings with you personally rather than posting it somewhere where people from all over the world can see. You should have a one-on-one conversation with them & tell them how you feel instead of ranting everything on their blogs.