sexy within... thoughts?

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JoyceJoanne
JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
in Chit-Chat
I was just reading a 'are you sexy' thread. Many of the people were saying that it comes from within... What are YOUR thoughts on it? Can you lose it if you once had it (inside or out)? Are you able to get it back? Can you 'get' it if you have never had it?? HOW do you do this??

I DID feel sexy. Mostly when I was MUCH heavier. Now that I have lost some weight, it seems I have lost 'it'. Lost the confidence that I once had. The 'sexiness' if you will. THAT is what I feel is sexy. How can I get back to that place?? It seems I need outside 'affirmation' from others. I never needed that before. Where is this coming from? Why is it here NOW?? Why is it that the 'heavy' girl had it, but the 'thinner' girl doesn't??

Any thoughts are appreciated. Thanks.
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Replies

  • JoyceJoanne
    JoyceJoanne Posts: 760 Member
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    ...anyone?? ...anyone??? .... Bueller??? :wink:
  • FierceFitBeautiful
    FierceFitBeautiful Posts: 46
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    I understand where you're coming from. I used to be so confident when I was heavier, believed I was beautiful & sexy, would strut my stuff around haha. But, when I embarked on this journey, I think I became more conscious of my appearance, especially when it came to my weight. I didn't see the same girl in the mirror anymore, and I still don't. I know that losing weight should make us all more confident and happy with ourselves, but I think all of the focus and realization of how I really look has taken a toll on my confidence -- and confidence is sexy!

    I've been trying to focus on being the best person I can be, instead of just focusing on my weight loss.. you know, being happy all the time, spending time with friends and family and volunteering. Hopefully in time the sexy confidence I used to have will come back!

    Best of luck - EVERYONE deserves to feel confident and sexy 100% of the time, and I hope you get that feeling back!! xx
  • livnlite
    livnlite Posts: 520
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    Feeling 'sexy' is a state of mind .. not body. You can feel sexy one day or moment in time .. and not the next. Not because of a change in body structure or body weight...but mood and attitude. It's about how you feel in your own skin.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
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    Gotta agree with the poster above me. Some days I feel really sexy and other days I just feel frumpy. If I'm wearing a cute outfit and feel happy and like the people I'm with, I feel sexy. Then there's other days where I can be wearing a decent outfit and am happy, but then my friends get hit on and i don't and i feel so unsexy. it's up and down for me.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    It is the same for us guys too I think but more how we are treated by ladies we find sexy and desirable.
    Our egos need to be stroked. :ohwell:
  • Jellyphant
    Jellyphant Posts: 1,400 Member
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    I feel the sexiest when I'm healthy. When I down a coke or eat something naughty, of course I feel the way I look with calories up in my mouth growse. I feel stunning when I'm drenched in sweat from a workout and have an apple in my hand, poolside post workout. <3
  • lizzue
    lizzue Posts: 276 Member
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    I used to feel sexy when I was thinner. I was a lot happier then as well. i felt strong and healthy, single and ready to mingle.

    Now I have put on weight I just feel frumpy and my confidence has hit the floor!

    Take me back to my thinner happier days anytime!
  • teagin2002
    teagin2002 Posts: 1,901 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
  • TheFitHooker
    TheFitHooker Posts: 3,358 Member
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    I can honestly say I've NEVER felt sexy till I recently. Through out my entire life I can't remember a time when I thought I was sexy. The more I work out, the more I feel sexy and the more I feel capable and I think working out has given me a confidence I've never had.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    ...anyone?? ...anyone??? .... Bueller??? :wink:

    :laugh:

    I don't know but those boots in your picture are VERY sexy!!!

    For me, sexiness does come from within. It's a state of mind. There are days I feel sexy and others I don't. By now at 32, I kinda know what I have to do to "feel" sexy. Like wearing certain types of clothes, working out, affirming myself, being around positive people, be productive, etc etc.

    I am also working on not letting my feeling sexy come from being validated by others. Sure, it's nice but I don't want my sense of worth coming from anybody else but me.

    I think it's very interesting you found yourself sexy when you were heavier... it's usually the other way around.
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,522 Member
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    At the risk of sounding like a creeper, if you're wearing those boots, you're sexy.
  • WarriorMom2012
    WarriorMom2012 Posts: 621 Member
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    It is the same for us guys too I think but more how we are treated by ladies we find sexy and desirable.
    Our egos need to be stroked. :ohwell:

    Not just your egos...
  • mleoni092708
    mleoni092708 Posts: 629 Member
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    At the risk of sounding like a creeper, if you're wearing those boots, you're sexy.

    That's right girl!
  • skinnywithin
    skinnywithin Posts: 1,392 Member
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    I think sexy is a state of mind..even a not so slim person can feel sexy ! For me...wearing my nice panties makes me feel sexy !!!!! Sexy isnt about being naked or the way you dress it is a state of mind !
  • Begood03
    Begood03 Posts: 1,261 Member
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    It is the same for us guys too I think but more how we are treated by ladies we find sexy and desirable.
    Our egos need to be stroked. :ohwell:

    Not just your egos...
    That's a fact Jack!!! lol
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    I feel sexiest when I'm wearing stocking, heels and red lipstick.

    Sorry I can't help on why you don't feel it now that you've lost weight... a woman's mind is a scary place. :flowerforyou:
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,522 Member
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    I feel sexiest when I'm wearing stocking, heels and red lipstick.

    *loosens collar*
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
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    Oddly enough I feel sexier now than I did when I was thin...granted, I wasn't in love with myself.

    I now love myself more than ever and know I deserve the best and am one to be reckoned with. My body will change throughout my life but my confidence has become like a rock. Once I'm back to a comfortable weight physically, I'll just be a million times more awesome than I am now. ;)

    I do believe it comes from within...look for it...and own it.
  • Pollywog39
    Pollywog39 Posts: 1,730 Member
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    I'm a cougar.


    lol.............................at my age, being sexy takes a bit of risk (because I don't want to act like a 30 year old, although sometimes I feel like one :)

    My weight has only been a problem to me. I don't think it affected my relationships very much...at least, if it did, I wasn't aware of it. (although my boobs were bigger when I was heavier.......hmmmm, think THAT'S why the OP felt sexier then??? lol)

    Men seem to like me because I'm honest, I love to laugh, I don't take myself too seriously, and I enjoy LIFE! I am happily single, I flirt like crazy, and as I lose this weight, my sexiness could become dangerous!
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    I feel sexiest when I'm wearing stocking, heels and red lipstick.

    *loosens collar*
    :wink:

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