Telephone call or in person?

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sylvuz323
sylvuz323 Posts: 468 Member
in Chit-Chat
So I've gone out on three dates with a guy I met online. He is a nice guy, but I'm just not feeling that chemistry/attraction towards him. I obviously need to tell him I'm not seeing us going any further than just friends, especially since he is texting me about doing a cruise. Texting it would be so darn easy, but how crappy would that be? Of course, thats probably more than some guys would do.

So should I call or see him?
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Replies

  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,455 Member
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    Do not text this! Not after 3 dates and with him talking about cruises. Which... btw... yikes! :laugh: I think phone would be okay for this early one but preferably face to face. Just ask him to coffee or something speedy. :wink:
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    I see no problem with responding to him as he is contacting you,he is comfortable with it instead of talking on the phone with you by the sounds so that should be fine.
  • sylvuz323
    sylvuz323 Posts: 468 Member
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    I see no problem with responding to him as he is contacting you,he is comfortable with it instead of talking on the phone with you by the sounds so that should be fine.

    I've thought the same since he will mainly text me, but I figured face to face would be more appropriate. I need to do something quick before he goes and books a cruise.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    It's never easy to dump someone, but it would be nice if you respected him enough to deliver the news in person. Just my opinion, of course.
  • YouAreTheShit
    YouAreTheShit Posts: 510 Member
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    I'm a pro at this and have been on both sides. It always sucks to have that conversation.

    I say no need to meet face to face. Just call him. It would be more embarrassing for him to be looking into your eyes when he hears the bad news.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    I think it should be in person. It's courteous.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
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    In your shoes, I think I'd do a phone call.... but I'm a wimp and hate confrontation.
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,366 Member
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    Man, I wish my ex would have consulted you all before our break-up. Years and years together and I got it over the phone. :laugh:
  • sylvuz323
    sylvuz323 Posts: 468 Member
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    It's interesting that the guys say text or phone call...and the girls say in person.
  • sylvuz323
    sylvuz323 Posts: 468 Member
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    Man, I wish my ex would have consulted you all before our break-up. Years and years together and I got it over the phone. :laugh:

    That sucks after years and years it should have been in person.
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
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    You should have your brother's friend's cousins's baby sister Tracy email him to tell him.
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
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    If he texts you to go out again...text him back that you would be more comfortable as friends.
    If he calls you to go out again...tell him the same during that call.

    Edit to add I wouldn't suggest texting the no if this was a relationship. It's not - it's 3 dates. For a relationship, it would be face to face OR a call.
  • happyhiram
    happyhiram Posts: 89
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    Please please please please please please PLEAAAAAASE do not text him the bad news.

    The last relationship I had ended that way and I was absolutely DEVASTATED. I would have felt so much better to have actually HEARD the news instead.

    I can imagine this guy will likely feel the same way.
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
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    You should have your brother's friend's cousins's baby sister Tracy email him to tell him.
    she's a liar....
  • galvodka
    galvodka Posts: 102
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    I'm a pro at this and have been on both sides. It always sucks to have that conversation.

    I say no need to meet face to face. Just call him. It would be more embarrassing for him to be looking into your eyes when he hears the bad news.

    I completely agree! A phone call would be perfect. You might even want to preface phone call with a text that asks him when he's free because you guys need to talk (to kinda give him heads up so he's not completely shocked).
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Doing it via text or phone will make him feel unimportant, and add insult to injury. Please be kind.
  • TheLuSir
    TheLuSir Posts: 1,674 Member
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    texting is a joke, but it does work when you are in between things.

    phone calls can tell you a lot about a person.

    whatever you do, take the necessary precautions, please!
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,366 Member
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    Man, I wish my ex would have consulted you all before our break-up. Years and years together and I got it over the phone. :laugh:

    That sucks after years and years it should have been in person.
    Yeah, I agree.

    With your situation, I'd take the collective male opinion here.
  • ahinescapron
    ahinescapron Posts: 351 Member
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    I think a phone call is fine. It is definitely better than texting him, but doesn't put him on the spot the way a face-to-face meeting would.
  • Helenatrandom
    Helenatrandom Posts: 1,166 Member
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    You could text him that no for the cruise, but do NOT break up with him over the phone.

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