Saying 'I love you' for the first time

Dtho5159

I have never said it first. The first time was with my ex boyfriend and I don't remember the details because I try to forget all that. The second time was with my husband. We got together 9 years ago when I was 18 and he was 23. He had never been with anyone, never dated anyone, surely never told anyone I love you but still said it first haha.

asudheimer

We went to school together since 1st grade, went on our first date the end of Jr year, became a couple the end of our Sr year and he said it first in email, I said it first in person, as soon as we became "official", married on our 5 yr aniv and will be celebrating 10 happy years with him this June! We have two beautiful babies together, and our love just keeps getting stronger!

david581c

"Like, i totally like you...but im not...in 'like' with you"

auticus

I will second the love and lust comment. In today's world they are one and the same.

One litmus test I use is... if she's telling me how in love she is with me now, if I was fat or had a disfiguring accident... would she still love me?

If the answer is no, then it's not really love, but lust.

karleen

my sons father and i didnt really fall in love until our son was well over a year old.. we stopped talking at one point for over 6 months after a raelly big fight. after we reconnected we kinda realized we cant live without each other.. he said it first, and not to be stereotypical or anything but it was right after we had done the deed lol

UponThisRock

Me: "Call me later"
My Wife: "Love you too...wait, what?"

We still laugh about that one

My1985Freckles

To me, love takes on many forms. A few replies have spoken to just throwing the term around, and I see that a lot, too. But because love has many forms to me, I say it to a lot of people. I have friends on here I've said it to, and genuinely mean it - however, I'm not IN love with them. I can love someone, and care very deeply for them, and not be IN love with them.

Agree!

First bf, day 17 after our first kiss. It kinda just came out. I did NOT mean it, he stood there grinning like a fool and didn't say it back. Glad that horrible experience is over.

My hubby.... I don't remember. We met online and chatted a few days before we had our first date. I knew by our second date that he was the man I was going to marry. I am pretty sure we told each other "I love you" on our second date. I remember reading a text from him on a camping trip with a few friends (maybe a week after we started dating so he wasn't invited along) and he had said he loves me and my friends kinda freaked with the whole "It's too soon to be saying stuff like that." Well, we are very happily married now so what do they know?

Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused

Yeah, there was one time I said it and should have kept it to myself!

untilthesun

i dont believe that you should only say i love you once, I think you should say it if you feel it, ive said it 2 times in my life to partners, but i tell my close friends i love them as often as i can, because i do, its a different type of love, but my life just wouldn't be the same without them.

once in my first serious relationship, i really did love him, but he didnt love me enough back, it took me a long time to realise that.


Then every day with my current man, Weve been together over 4 years, have known each other for 9, he was a best friend of mine and we eventually got together at uni. It was early into our relationship when he said it, on one of our first kind of dates. we were at a gig for a band we loved. 80s matchbox b-line disaster, we had an amazing night, and i climbed up on stage (with help of a roadie) and got a set list, a drum stick and guys towel, plus a poster, which were rare at there gigs. we were on the train home, and he just looked at me, and said it. we had been together about a month, he said he always had loved me. We have told each other "I love you" every day since. I have no regrets. I love him,

Bonniebigbutt

The first time my boyfriend-now husband told me he loved me we were fooling around in my apartment and he said,"I think I'm falling in love with you." We had been dating for almost 3 months and had only been sleeping together a couple of weeks. To be truthful I was shocked. He was so tall and handsome, I kept waiting for him to loose interest in me, I had decided to just have fun with him and not take anything too seriously so that I wouldn't get hurt. I told him that I was trying to just have fun and I wasn't ready to say anything that serious, yet. He asked me if I was serious about being his girl and I said as long as we are having fun, yes. A few weeks later I told him I loved him and he said it right back, it was very natural. That was 12 years ago. I guess he didn't loose interest in this funny girl with a big butt.

infamousmk

I said it first to my fiancee. We had been seeing each other for about six months or so, and we had just recently had the discussion to officially call ourselves a couple. We were hanging out and I said, "I need to tell you something, and you don't have to reply or comment at all, no pressure." ... and then I got all scared and embarrassed and I whispered to him "I love you." he literally stopped breathing for a second, I thought he was going to freak out!! lol .. he said, "I knew you were going to say that ..." and got a little teary. We had a really nice time the rest of the evening, and I didn't really expect him to say anything back, but when he was leaving he said, "I've wanted to say it for a little while now. I'm nervous." and I told him he didn't have to say it if he didn't feel like it, but he did, and then it made ME stop breathing ... and it was right then that I knew we were totally meant for each other.

zippo32

............."That's a big matzah ball!" -Seinfeld

odusgolp

I've only said it to one guy ever... my now ex-husband

And I said it first... When you know, you know.

Sadly - that's never happened again *LOL*

skittybang

I've said it to only person genuinely. He said it first, though. We were going to the tattoo/piercing parlor and wanted to do something different. So what do you when you've been dating for a good month? That's right, you get nip piercings together. It was so romantic how the piercer grabbed my girl and my guy looked lovingly upon the exchange. Well - later that night he was telling me how he got them pierced before with his ex-gf. So of course being a woman and owning the equipment I mention "so, is this some right of passage all the girls get to experience?" He told me that "you're not just some other girl - I love you" and yada yada so the story goes, together for 7+ years, married for over 3. Still laugh maniacally about how the "i love you's" came about :bigsmile:

KatrineJohansen

I've said it to two people I've been romantically involved with - of course the ones that I was actually serious about. The first one was my first boyfriend, A. It was a weird and extreme relationship, I was 14 when he was 20, but we were together for a year even though my parents were downright against it, so we met in secret. That’s hard when you live two hundred miles apart, haha. But that’s a whole other story:
We started out by just writing each other on IM, and I think that a month into our relationship, when we weren’t really considering us as a couple, he began just bursting out “Omg, I love you!” whenever I said something cute/silly/sweet/whatever – but it was never anything awkward or weird, and I didn’t feel like it was pushed onto me that I should say the same thing back, because it didn’t seem that serious. So when we finally got to the face-to-face declarations of love, it really wasn’t “a big thing” – he’d said it ten thousand times and I was head over heal in love (and 14, so I guess I wasn’t really taking my time to consider whether I TRULY meant the words coming out of my mouth when I said them the first time). Actually I don’t remember the first time I told him I love you very clearly, though.
The second one was my current boyfriend, P. We’ve been together for two years and three months now.
This was a much more normal relationship, thus everything was a lot easier, even though this guy also lives 150-or-so miles away. Our first “I love you”’s are imprinted in my memory. You may have to get a little background first: At the beginning of our relationship, I actually thought that it would be a three month fling and then he would pass on to the next one – I’d been friends with him for a long time, but he never seemed like the ‘going solid’ type of guy, so I did not expect me to become the exception. In the beginning I was constantly feeling self-concious, afraid that I would scare the good thing we had away if I became too cheesy with him, and telling him “I love you” was REALLY off the table for the six months of our relationship. Don’t get me wrong – as time passed we (mostly, he) became better at giving each other striking compliments and expressing love in actions rather than words. We worshipped each other, truly. It goes cheesier.
We’d been together for almost exactly six months when we decided to have sex – I wasn’t a virgin, but very inexperienced, and it was his first time. We made it this super special, super romantic thing – and we failed horribly, never getting the penetration right because we (mostly me) were so nervous. But he was like “oh well, no big deal! We’ll just give it another try tomorrow!” and afterwards we lay together, spooning in my dark room, talking about nothing and everything at the same time. You know that feeling when you can feel someone smiling into your neck when you’re spooning? I felt that. And then my stomach just burst with joy, as I said: “...P?.. Would this be a horribly cheesy moment to tell you I love you?” I must have been mumbling horribly, because he had to ask me to repeat it – which I did, blushing, as I turned around to face him, and the GORGEOUS smile that met my lips. When we let go of the kiss again, he said: “No it’s not, silly. I’ve been meaning to tell you that I love you for ages, but I was just so afraid that YOU weren’t there yet. I do love you. More than anything”. And there was much rejoicing.

Haha, that was some ramble, but yeah..

adjones5

I wouldn't recommend saying it to anyone, ever. It always ends bad.

3shirts

can't answer this one...too hard and too personal.

Then why post anything?

adjones5

Actually I wouldn't even recommend thinking it either.

auticus

Actually I wouldn't even recommend thinking it either.

It's obvious you've been fried by someone recently. Take time off to heal yourself. Despite the bitterness, one can find it again but one must always be careful with whom they decide to give themselves to.

HMD7703

Uber personal but I enjoyed reading the other responses. So here goes.

Really quick into our relationship.. maybe 1 month.. I felt it. I was blown away from the start, but I really felt this strong love. Not lust, not sexual; but this I-would-take-a-bullet-for-you love. We connected on so many levels. He was my male counterpart, laughed at my jokes, totally gets me and my quirks.

I started it by saying, "I more than like you". I would get this funny look back like Hmm... This went on for about a week or so. Then one night when he asked how I felt, I said, "I have been telling you all along: I more than like you". He says, "I love you too". I cried. A good cry. It is still a running joke. I more than like you. Yeah yeah, I more than like you too.

Love is funny.

emilydmac

We said I love you before we were even dating!!!! But that is because he and I were best friends for months before I would date him. Then- about 2 weeks into actual dating (even though we knew each other and had pretty much been together for months, he sat me down and told me he was falling for me, I gave him a hug and said 'I love you too Eric' and then we lived happily ever after. Sort of!!! Haha we are still together and I still love him more than a year later!

Indy_Mario

I said it first.
A bit over a month after we started dating. We were talking about my childhood over the phone (kinda rough), and she cried for me a little. She said it made her feel horrible to think she complains about her childhood after hearing about mine. I knew then she was the type of soul I wanted to have complete mine. I said, "You know, I love how sweet you are. You are so honest with your emotions, I love that about you. I...love you". The phone went silent, I freaked out. She said she couldn't reply with the same because she wanted to make sure she felt the same way. I agreed, we said good night and that was one of the worst nights (sleep-wise) I've ever had to experience.
The next day we texted a bit, I was distant, she could tell. Finally she brought-up the topic and I told her I didn't wish to take back what I said because I meant it. I asked her to take her time, and that if she decided that wasn't what she felt for me, that I'd also like to know. A couple of days went by, then, one evening when we were making random small talk over the phone again, I made a joke. She said: "I love your sense of humor, I always wanted to find a tall, dark and handsome man that'd make me laugh and make me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world". "I love everything about you", she said, "I am in love with you".

That was about a bit over three years ago. She is now my fiance. She has been the only person I've said those three words to and knew, without a doubt, I meant them.

Kenzietea2

Girrrrrrrrrrrrrrl you are so young, and engaged??????????????

Haha, I assume you mean me Young for some, sure! I actually usually am in complete agreement with you. 21 (almost 22) does seem VERY young to be engaged. I really am an old soul though. I've known what I've wanted for a long time, months away from starting my career, and never been happier. I have never been more sure of something! But if it eases your mind we have plans of waiting a decent amount of time! Or wedding isn't until spring 2013. I will be 23, not much older I suppose

Kenzietea2

Uber personal but I enjoyed reading the other responses. So here goes.

Really quick into our relationship.. maybe 1 month.. I felt it. I was blown away from the start, but I really felt this strong love. Not lust, not sexual; but this I-would-take-a-bullet-for-you love. We connected on so many levels. He was my male counterpart, laughed at my jokes, totally gets me and my quirks.

I started it by saying, "I more than like you". I would get this funny look back like Hmm... This went on for about a week or so. Then one night when he asked how I felt, I said, "I have been telling you all along: I more than like you". He says, "I love you too". I cried. A good cry. It is still a running joke. I more than like you. Yeah yeah, I more than like you too.

Love is funny.

That is adorable! Thanks for sharing

Kenzietea2

You are really pretty and that makes me too intimidated to reply.

LOL, thank you! But you should anyway, I love reading these!

Kenzietea2

said it three days after we met and we have been together for 11yrs now!

wow! love at first site

Kenzietea2

To answer my own question:
I am currently engaged and he said it first, although not long after I was thinking it. I was laying on his chest and he said "You know I love you, right?".

This is NOT saying "I love you"... more of a weaker version. I told my wife (then girlfriend) "I love you" and did not hear it back.. got nothing. I did this for three weeks before I got one back. I know she loves me, been married almost 15 years.

No, it was. You weren't there, nor do you know what exactly we were talking about it the moment. Or the conversation after wards. That wasn't a very nice response to something so personal and intimate I shared. If you don't have something nice to say, maybe you shouldn't say it at all. Just sayin' :ohwell:

littlebuddy84

I was going out with my boyfriend for about 6 months and he told me I love u first and all I remember thinking was what do I say? So I told him I liked him too and he just said oh ok then thanks and went home. I was only 17 and were together 10 years now.

Mallory0418

I've had it said to me by 3 different guys, they all said it first. I think I felt it first for one of them but was WAY to whimpy to tell him. I didn't have to wait long though, lol.

One guy told me he loved me after being together for only 2 weeks. It went something like this: "I hope you don't think I'm crazy, but I really need you to know. I am completely in love with you!" I felt the same way and was worried he would figure it out and think I was crazy. LOL That was a good one. :smooched:

I have only said it back to 2 of the 3 guys though. I would NEVER say that to someone if I didn't feel it. Not a good idea for anyone.

briocktj

The night I met my hubby for the first time, I went home and told my mom and Granny that I had met the man I was going to marry. A couple weeks into the relationship I told him I loved him and he said dont tell me that. It is too soon. So... we kept dating and he eventually told me he loved me too and we will celebrate 19 years of marriage on January 23rd.