Faker?

135

Replies

  • wow the support dries up real quick on here haha...
    it’s odd, I mean yeah it’s a place of high-fives and wtg’s... but beyond that it seems somewhat superficial... I was hoping I could meet people who actually wanted to get to know each other, support the weight loss and share the sorties... but after the first round of avid enthusiast I can say there is maybe only one person who I can get boo out of...
    should I give my finger a workout and start deleting or stick with it and give it a bit more time?


    Did you think this was like Jenny Craig or Weight Watcher meetings??
  • N_BEAST_MODE_24_7
    N_BEAST_MODE_24_7 Posts: 120 Member
    Stay focus on what you are here for! Some ppl on here are great and some are not but it shouldn't make a difference on why you are here. You either focus on your weight loss or your not! Regardless of the ppl you meet on here, your weight loss success is all on you, NO EXCUSES.....Welcome and lets get it on!
  • Specializedbkh
    Specializedbkh Posts: 22 Member
    Good attitude works, try it.

    Ultimately, YOU are responsible for your own success. Coming to a site to make friends is a bit unrealistic, it can happen, but should not be the focus.

    First impressions are certainly at play here, just a thought.

    Absolutely!
    Nicely said~

    I personally don't say motivational things to others unless I am truly moved by what they have accomplished.. but that's just because I'm kinda shy... Feel kinda silly... But just know, everyone here is on here for a reason... To lose weight, I'd like to think..
    Friends can be made, but if you're looking for a more social site--- perhaps try Facebook or Myspace. :wink:
  • Ahluvly
    Ahluvly Posts: 389 Member
    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh don't give them the satisfaction of thinking they're pleasing you when they're not! If they're crap in bed, then help them improve or get them off you, quick lol
    I usually only fake orgasms... so I guess I can be considered a "faker". :tongue:
  • balibee146
    balibee146 Posts: 127 Member
    Some very good suggestions here.....and some, well, NOT.

    Please be nice people. If someone seems to be having a rough time and you feel you can't support them there's no need to have a go!
  • mlawilm
    mlawilm Posts: 39 Member
    just like everything....it takes time !!
  • Ahluvly
    Ahluvly Posts: 389 Member
    On a more serious note, all friendships take work and I think it will depend on what your expectations are of MFP and the support system! Go with your gut instinct, it's usually right flower! Some people view this as being up there with top priorities...others, not so much!
  • oliviapeacock
    oliviapeacock Posts: 13 Member
    Good attitude works, try it.

    Ultimately, YOU are responsible for your own success. Coming to a site to make friends is a bit unrealistic, it can happen, but should not be the focus.

    First impressions are certainly at play here, just a thought.

    @s working out. Everyone likes that. I grow more when I view Food Diaries, try recipes posted, visit websites mentioned, etc. After reading what each person has done to mold and change their bodies thru working out, it not only excites me, but challenges me to break a personal best.

    Good luck on your journey. =]
  • Wow I'm surprised at the harshness of some of the replies - no need to take it personally is there? I don't know MFP well at all but I have only experience positivity so far so I have found this a bit surprising!

    I'd say give it time, get involved with message boards and giving (encouraging) feedback and you'll be on your way!
  • madubil
    madubil Posts: 131 Member
    looks like this certainly sparked some debate... In my opinion, this is really a very helpful site- but at the end of the day- it comes down to you. I am responsible for what goes into my mouth- and for what I do to work my body and those calories. Thats all on me. But as a human, I need some cheering on, and some days I need to be lifted up. Here's where this site comes into play. I have been here on days when I wanted to crawl back to bed and say F this. And I come here- and cheer on friends, or read about someone else who has had the success I am looking for- and it lifts me.

    The site and the people here lift each other- but we dont carry anyone. The suport here is wonderful- but its really what you put into it. I think in that way its a bit different from facebook and the like. There are alot of people here just like you and just like me- its sort of a matter of finding them, and finding people who have common threads with you- if you want that.

    The food logging, the measurements tracking- its all good ****- but at the end of the day, it comes down to what you are putting into it.
  • mlawilm
    mlawilm Posts: 39 Member
    hmmmm.....wth?? :noway:
  • BattyMama
    BattyMama Posts: 136 Member
    Don't know about you but my friends have helped me push off unneeded guilt for slip ups kept me here when I was ready to walk away and live with how I was, gave me the strength to post a current pic of me and while yes I too had days where I cant stand my-self I have people here that "pop In " and put a smile on my face.
  • leeshults
    leeshults Posts: 223 Member
    Maybe you are used to "in person" groups? Online is very different but just as supportive.... if you let it be.

    Frankly I work, keep up a home, have outside activities with grandchildren, travel.....I don't have time to sit on here and write a long letter to each of my friends. However, they ARE my friends because they give me WTG or a GOOD JOB when I deserve it and it lets me know they are thinking about me. If they have a problem or want to talk that is time for the long message and I will be here for them. I think MFP is the best thing that ever happened to me in my weight war. But I did it for me, not really to make lasting friends. If I get some lasting friends from it too, then how great is that??

    I made one friend on here right off the bat and we write each other, but not every day. If you need that kind of support maybe you should look at a local group where you can meet face-to-face. However, I think you should give this site a fair chance because I am proof that it works!
  • mnwalkingqueen
    mnwalkingqueen Posts: 1,299 Member
    Wow!! Such a negative view point. Honestly the only one that can do it is you. People can praise you all they want but if that is your motivation it's the wrong kind. I am gonna keep doing what I do regardless of what support I get cause I want this bad enough. I am sure you just offended everyone on your friends list too.
  • becka63
    becka63 Posts: 712 Member
    Just keep your eyes on the prize here!!

    I was quite reticent about friending people on here when I first joined, I mean, it's the Internet right? But...given time and effort, I have made many truly wonderful friends here who I would be proud to know in real life. In fact, although I've never met them, I feel in some cases that I do know them!

    So how to do it? Someone 'wtgs'? Thank them. Comment on their comments and achievements. Acquaintances of 10 days will be superficial at first. Friends of nearly one year are not. Join groups. Look at what exercise you are interested in and join a group, either on the forums or in the groups section. Theres bound to be one, if not, you could take the plunge and start one! Look through this thread and look for the supportive and helpful comments, check those posters out and if you want, send them a friend request....

    Maybe as someone who is relatively new to the site you could friend request someone who has been around longer- a poster on here referred to new year revolutionists, if you know you've got more sticking power than that, find friends who have been around.

    Hope it works out for you.
  • Chin up sugar dumplin' :-) :flowerforyou:
  • twinsanity
    twinsanity Posts: 1,757 Member
    wow the support dries up real quick on here haha...
    it’s odd, I mean yeah it’s a place of high-fives and wtg’s... but beyond that it seems somewhat superficial... I was hoping I could meet people who actually wanted to get to know each other, support the weight loss and share the sorties... but after the first round of avid enthusiast I can say there is maybe only one person who I can get boo out of...
    should I give my finger a workout and start deleting or stick with it and give it a bit more time?

    I've met quite a few people on here I can HONESTLY say I hope to know for the rest of my life.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    I usually only fake orgasms... so I guess I can be considered a "faker". :tongue:

    This makes me sad.

    LOL
  • jeckyb
    jeckyb Posts: 60
    at the start my friends and i say things like wtg,well done,good job,but the more you get to know each other the more you're there for each other,give it time add more friends. im still fairly new to this but my friends are great,hope you find some great ones too :)
  • soonersgirl
    soonersgirl Posts: 254 Member
    The more you interact with your friends, the more they will interact with you. You can't expect it to be one way and you can expect other people to be responsible for your success. I really hope you give it more time. I have been here since June of last year and people come and go. I have alot of friends on here that I can count on for support, but I don't know much about their family and personal life.
  • cherigurl
    cherigurl Posts: 184 Member
    The friends I have on my list ROCK, they kick @ss and keep me inline. Not sure who you have on your list but maybe they gave up on you because you gave up on your self already. Nobody like a crybaby.
  • at the start my friends and i say things like wtg,well done,good job,but the more you get to know each other the more you're there for each other,give it time add more friends. im still fairly new to this but my friends are great,hope you find some great ones too :)

    Got to agree with this. I have great friends, and even when I went to 'explore' another website for a couple of months, they were here when I came back. I find the greatest support on MFP and hope you can, too. We all have to put into this as well, and not just rely on the WTGs, and Good Jobs to keep us motivated. Ultimately, as someone already said, it is up to us, and use the encouragement as an extra, added support.
  • starsnyc21
    starsnyc21 Posts: 436 Member
    Well I'm not sure who your friends are but I have the most supportive and sincere group of people on my page. I have gotten to know a lot of them on a personal level and we even email each other outside of MFP. I think what you give it what you get. If you give sincere support, you will eventually find those good people who want to give it back.

    Give a some time before you write MFP off.
  • jeckyb
    jeckyb Posts: 60
    Good attitude works, try it.

    Ultimately, YOU are responsible for your own success. Coming to a site to make friends is a bit unrealistic, it can happen, but should not be the focus.

    First impressions are certainly at play here, just a thought.

    @s working out. Everyone likes that. I grow more when I view Food Diaries, try recipes posted, visit websites mentioned, etc. After reading what each person has done to mold and change their bodies thru working out, it not only excites me, but challenges me to break a personal best.

    Good luck on your journey. =]

    agree with both :)
  • skinnywithin
    skinnywithin Posts: 1,392 Member
    I have the greatest bunch of smartass, supportive friends a girl could ever ask for !!!!!!!! Plus they know if the leave me I will hunt them down !
  • bjfmade
    bjfmade Posts: 543 Member
    Don't use others as an excuse to quit. You are here for YOU and anything else you get from here is a bonus. You get what you put into it and when a person goes in expecting specific things to happen, they are bound to be disappointed. Open up your mind and begin a fabulous journey that will help you succeed. You are the only one to blame if it does not happen.
    You just got your first taste of real support. The boards don't take kindly to the "poor me" attitude. Good luck on your "lifestyle change". It is what you make it.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    I don't know who your friends are, but I have some of the most amazing, geniune, gorgeous, dedicated, supportive, and motivating friends on MFP. Not sure what you expect being a newbie, but I would suggest losing the negative attitude. No one like that. :flowerforyou:

    This.

    It may take a while to build a support network on MFP...but you have to work on a positive attitude and balance. Those things will also help you get healthy and fit. Also, sometimes people get busy and forget to post or comment...don't take it so personally. I try to let my MFPals know when I will be too busy to comment or be around much, but I can't always do that.
  • So far I have a great support team! Sorry yours is not so good, but maybe a positive attitude will help you, and it has to start with YOU, not online friends...just sayin'
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
    Yes! Birds of a feather need to stick together!
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
    wow the support dries up real quick on here haha...
    it’s odd, I mean yeah it’s a place of high-fives and wtg’s... but beyond that it seems somewhat superficial... I was hoping I could meet people who actually wanted to get to know each other, support the weight loss and share the sorties... but after the first round of avid enthusiast I can say there is maybe only one person who I can get boo out of...
    should I give my finger a workout and start deleting or stick with it and give it a bit more time?
    Most of the time, you get out of it what you put into it. "It" can be school, a job, a relationship, your MFP Steve Perry, etc.

    It takes effort to nurture any relationship, even online ones. Sometimes that effort may seem wasted when the relationship doesn't go the way you want. It is tempting to be disappointed, bitter. I argue that the effort is practice and experience. Not every relationship is going to go your way. Keep making an effort, keep learning. Relationships can require practice.

    Resist the temptation of bitterness and self-righteousness. In my experience, neither of those have ever provided anything positive.
This discussion has been closed.