What makes a friend a lover?

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oneIT
oneIT Posts: 388 Member
Since a lover is supposed to be your best friend also, what takes it that extra way?

Attraction?
Security?
Bedroom Performance? LOL!
The millions of other things?
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Replies

  • jaxdiablo
    jaxdiablo Posts: 580
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    Naked hugging usually... until you cross that line it's all platonic.
  • _binary_jester_
    _binary_jester_ Posts: 2,132 Member
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    Nudity

    Edit: Damn it. Late again
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    When you feel that tingle. You know THE one!!! Well that'd make them lover material.. but if both of you are feeling THE tingle then...
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
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    You are happy to see a friend. A lover is someone who your heart skips around at the thought of seeing them, and you can think about nothing else.

    Until you've been married a few years. Then the line starts to blur.
  • ncahill77
    ncahill77 Posts: 501 Member
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    You are happy to see a friend. A lover is someone who your heart skips around at the thought of seeing them, and you can think about nothing else.

    Until you've been married a few years. Then the line starts to blur.

    dammit we need a "like" button
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,332 Member
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    Naked hugging usually... until you cross that line it's all platonic.
    Agreed. Lol.
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
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    Sex
  • theoneandonlybrookie
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    You are happy to see a friend. A lover is someone who your heart skips around at the thought of seeing them, and you can think about nothing else.

    Until you've been married a few years. Then the line starts to blur.

    Ha. Very true!

    I agree with the heart skipping a beat response - or at least that's how it should start, in my opinion.

    Of course, eventually the feeling of wanting to be naked with that person 24 / 7 fades (according to science, it can only last 2 years tops but I'm sure there are others who have experienced it longer) and hopefully you have the friendship, warmth, and loving feelings to fall back on in your relationship. Oh, and hopefully you still at least occasionally want to get it on with that person.
  • kimdoes
    kimdoes Posts: 90
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    We do need like buttons!
  • HeidiMightyRawr
    HeidiMightyRawr Posts: 3,343 Member
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    When you both start to find each other sexually attractive and cross that line beyond what "just good friends" do.
  • oneIT
    oneIT Posts: 388 Member
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    Sex

    But why would you have sex with one and not another? Booze or attraction? LOL!
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    Money.
  • mhankosk
    mhankosk Posts: 535 Member
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    Naked hugging usually... until you cross that line it's all platonic.

    HAHA! This thread is cracking me up! :bigsmile:
  • savlyon
    savlyon Posts: 474 Member
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    I think sex ruins things unless there is security. Yes, this is coming from a girl...but still. You can't pretend that sex makes a great friendship better...
    My vote is security.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    Total intimacy,physical and emotional.
    A friend you lean on,a lover you bond with.
  • rileamoyer
    rileamoyer Posts: 2,411 Member
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    I did not know a lover is supposed to be your best friend. hmmm. Guess I messed up a few times in my life! LOL
  • hperowl
    hperowl Posts: 234 Member
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    You are happy to see a friend. A lover is someone who your heart skips around at the thought of seeing them, and you can think about nothing else.

    Until you've been married a few years. Then the line starts to blur.

    Ha. Very true!

    I agree with the heart skipping a beat response - or at least that's how it should start, in my opinion.

    Of course, eventually the feeling of wanting to be naked with that person 24 / 7 fades (according to science, it can only last 2 years tops but I'm sure there are others who have experienced it longer) and hopefully you have the friendship, warmth, and loving feelings to fall back on in your relationship. Oh, and hopefully you still at least occasionally want to get it on with that person.

    The feelings don't stop after several years of marriage, they just shift into something more steady, kind of like a consistent warm glow instead of the flash and bang. Of course, if the two of you work at it the flash and bang still happens too:devil:
    P.S. I've been happily married for almost 15 years:love:
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
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    Mutual physical attraction that leads to sex. I don't think you need security or an emotional attachment to the person, other than what you had as friends. But, when I hear "lover" I think a sexual partner, not someone you are necessarily 'in love' with.
  • IronmanPanda
    IronmanPanda Posts: 2,083 Member
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    Naked hugging usually... until you cross that line it's all platonic.

    Ha!
  • krystonite
    krystonite Posts: 553 Member
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    Uhhh, if she gives me the time of day.

    I have ridiculously low expectations.