Son got a speed ticket

ninerbuff

I would say take the car until he completes the defensive driving course. It's $25 that he should pay out of pocket, and it will take the ticket off his record, help him think twice about when he speeds or does other reckless things while driving (I know it did me! I daily think about what I learned in my defensive driving course), and the time he doesn't have the car is totally up to him. It could be one day, it could be a week. All I know is he has until, I think, about a month from getting the ticket to complete the course for it to be valid. Plus, having taken defensive driving should get you a discount on your car insurance.

This. When I got my first ticket, I went to driver's school and got it taken off. But, I think it's more important for him to learn the OUTCOME if someone lost control speeding or couldn't react in time. He'll probably understand he could get into an accident, but when you have him really sit down and think of what an accident might actually do to someone else's life, he may get it.
I don't go over 10mph max on the freeway and 5 in residential. Haven't gotten a speeding ticket (nor and accident) since I was 27.


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quietlywinning

The defensive drivers course is just one day course - totally different than the required drivers ed. He'll get it that the rules of the road are safety rules....people die because of driving as crazy as he was. He was flying, not just a couple miles over the speed limit. He is very lucky he only got a ticket and not a manslaughter charge. In our state, he would have lost his license instantly, being 17 and more than 20 mph over the limit.

maidentl

I think you should let the law handle it. He's already been punished in the form of having to pay a ticket with his own money. Hopefully he learns his lesson from that.

I agree with this. If he didn't have the ability to pay the ticket, I could see you needing to handle it some other way. But the cost of that fine will be punishment enough.

TurtleRunnerNC

Our local high school has lost 4 children in the last year due to car accidents. Most involved speeding & or over-correcting on side roads. They just do not have the experience & they think nothing bad will happen.

Maybe having him talk to friends & family of kids his age who have lost their lives doing something that seems so innocent.

It is great that he was up front about the ticket. I like the idea of asking him what he thinks the consequences should be.

30yearssincebikini

I wouldn't do anything. Most of us have gotten tickets and we learn from them. He sounds like a responsible kid who will make a fine adult. You have done a good job with him. It's just a speeding ticket. It will pass.

foodfight247

Personally I'd make him pay the speeding and take the keys away for the weekend.

It'll make him think twice.

Here in the uk if you get 6 points on your license within the first two years of passing your test, your license gets revoked. Considering a speeding fine carries 3 points each time caught, you only get two chances.

joannasaurusrex

I'm 24 and find the idea of you 'punishing' him really weird! He's an adult and he makes his own choices. If he's old enough to drive, and he pays his own insurance etc, then he's old enough to live with the consequences.

He didn't do anything THAT bad. Let's face it, most of go a little over the speed limit every now and then, whether we mean to or not. Getting 'caught' is pretty much bad luck.

He sounds like a lovely boy if he came home and told you straight away. For what it's worth, I also got done for speeding when I was 17, and the reality of having points on my license was AWFUL to come to terms with. He's probably feeling bad enough.

Hoppymom

I'd take it for a week or so. I owuld let the mdrive only to get to work and back. No going to friends etc. and he would have to pay the insurance increase that is coming your way too. My kids always knew if they drank and drove even if the cops didn't know but I did the car was gone for good. Never had a problem even once because they knew from day one tha mom and dad don't make threats they make promises and carry out consequences. They thank us today for raising them right.

shvits

It happened to me too. I had to take the battery out of the car at one point. He kept speeding. He got a few tickets. He got a ticket for being in the commute lane with no passengers (he was in a hurry). He got a ticket for cutting in front of a cop from an exit lane only. He finally stopped driving fast when he hit a woman in a cross walk. Lucky, he did not kill her or hurt her too badly. He was really upset. He was about 28 years old (now 31). He stopped driving fast after he hit the woman in the cross walk and realized, yes, he could have killed her. My son needed to learn by experience, I think it is a guy thing. Be patient. Restrict his driving. Keep trying. Good Luck!

koosdel

Buy a radar detector.

slacker80

Teach em evassive driving techniques.



Just being silly since you already got a ton of note worthy responses.

macpatti

I have a 25, 20, and 17 year old son. They've all had a speeding ticket. It's going to happen (most likely). I've never taken their cars from them, and they weren't able to pay their own tickets because we never allowed them to work in high school. What we did instead was whenever they asked for money, we would hold back some until they "paid us back" the amount and we made them take defensive driving. Responsible, good kids make mistakes all the time.

Ocarina

Definitely want to punish him how you see fit. Paying for ticket and his own insurance is definitely a great learning tool since he'll see his insurance go up from this.

My sister did not get punished and it has almost cost her life.

She ended up speeding about 70mph down an exit ramp on the highway and while doing so was adjusting her iPod and did not pay attention. The next few seconds the seat belt saved her life as she rolled her car 4 times off the side of the road. She came out unscathed but there could not always be a next time. This poor kid has never been punished for driving issues and now has like 3-4 tickets on her record and a misdemeanor and she's only 16. Punish your kids now and they will thank you later.

badgerbadger1

I'm 24 and find the idea of you 'punishing' him really weird! He's an adult and he makes his own choices. If he's old enough to drive, and he pays his own insurance etc, then he's old enough to live with the consequences.

He didn't do anything THAT bad. Let's face it, most of go a little over the speed limit every now and then, whether we mean to or not. Getting 'caught' is pretty much bad luck.

He sounds like a lovely boy if he came home and told you straight away. For what it's worth, I also got done for speeding when I was 17, and the reality of having points on my license was AWFUL to come to terms with. He's probably feeling bad enough.

He's not an adult. He's 17.

MissTomGettingThin

I'm of the opinion that speeding tickets are really just an insidious tax without representation because speed limits are rarely if ever set to an appropriate level. There really is no appropriate level since that would have to take into account driver ability, conditions, and car performance. That said, I drive slowly (9mph over the speed limit in GA) all the time because I don't want to pay that tax I have no say in.

I was caught speeding and did a speed awareness course.

You need to do one of these, Sir.

badgerbadger1

I have a 25, 20, and 17 year old son. They've all had a speeding ticket. It's going to happen (most likely). I've never taken their cars from them, and they weren't able to pay their own tickets because we never allowed them to work in high school. What we did instead was whenever they asked for money, we would hold back some until they "paid us back" the amount and we made them take defensive driving. Responsible, good kids make mistakes all the time.

It's not a mistake. It's a choice. Choices have consequences. The consequences of speeding are not an oops, they can cost someone their life.

Kids need consequences or they grow up thinking the rules don't apply to them.

honeysprinkles

Make him pay for the ticket himself, I can't think of a better punishment. I've yet to get a speeding ticket because I know who'd be paying it if I did get one!

kbmnurse

Make sure he has taken drivers ed and/or defensive driving class. Not sure taking the car away will help. Make sure he is paying all expenses affiliated with the ticket.

rschmmidt

I would make him pay the ticket and the difference on your insurance. That is what my parents would have done with me!

That's what I was thinking.

macpatti

It's not a mistake. It's a choice. Choices have consequences. The consequences of speeding are not an oops, they can cost someone their life.

The "mistake" made was "choosing" to speed. I realize speeding can lead to accidents and lost lives. I wasn't minimizing the effects speeding can have.

Kids need consequences or they grow up thinking the rules don't apply to them.

I never said kids shouldn't have consequences for their actions. I gave my personal opinion about the consequence the OP was asking about. My children have not grown up thinking rules don't apply to them.