Having Babies, for the women.

bebreli

I know that worry, stress and baby making don't mix. I am on the complete opposite spectrum of all the ladies here but I think it is because of this is why things worked. First of all if you have a regular cycle (I recommend tracking in mymonthlycycles.com) that definitely increases your chances. I got married at 30 and really never thought about or wanted kids. My husband had the baby fever. We TTC 7 months after we got married and I had no worries that I really wanted to get pregnant or that it would work out. I had cervical cancer in my 20s and they said I may not even be able to carry a baby. I figured we would try, I would have a miscarriage and maybe eventually we would get pregnant or we wouldn't. I was fine with that. I was not stressed, I was not worried I was fine with whatever happened. That first month we tried during my fertile days and we got pregnant.. with TWINS!! The point of my story is don't stress and don't worry!

dlyeates

I wouldn't worry!!! Just because you haven't been pregnant does not mean you can't get pregnant!!! When we decided to start trying (we were married 3 years.....I think that's a good time to start trying!!) I was more worried that something might be wrong with him because I don't think he protected himself as much as he should have with previous partners and none of them ever came up pregnant!!!

Don't worry about it now. Continue your health journey. Enjoy being married and all that comes with being with your husband. A child does change a relationship, not always in a bad way but it is different. Enjoy getting to know each other without children being around.....it will give you a more solid foundation to parent on!!!

JoanWill

So I am 29 recently married and all I can think of is babies, we are not ready financially or emotionally but I have this constant worry that I will not be able to have kids, cause I have never been pregnant.

I have my yearly physicals and everything is fine but I am just worried, they don't always find everything in physicals. I need to stop worrying.

Does anyone else feel like this? How can I stop worrying?

I was the exact same way when I got married. I was 28. I was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). I wasn't sure if was going to get pregnant...ever. But I had that fear, that worry.

I talked to my husband and expressed my concerns. He understood. But he always tell me that things will always work out. I had to trust him or I would go bonkers. And I am glad I did. He is such a planner and men have a way of looking at things without so much emotions involved.

After 3 yrs of marriage, I was right, because of PCOS I can not have kids without fertility pills. After 2 rounds, I was pregnant with B/G twins. Bought our house and the twins were born.

You have to trust that things will all work out. Because, yes... they always do. And you will never be financially and emotionally ready for kids. We thought we were... then bam! Twins! But then again, things will always work out. Good luck.

EMarvie

I was super worried too - Overweight all my life.. I was on birth control since i was 16 - was planning on getting married- (got married march 2008) I work shift work - a lot of my co-workers had a hard time getting pregnant -
well, in october 2007 we (my hubby and I) decided that I would stop taking the pill - I heard that it takes a bit to get out of your system -

well, it didnt - I was pregnant by november 15th - oops.. my wedding wasnt till march - well, needless to say I got married at 4.5 months pregnant - it didnt take long at all -
and now I have a happy healthy beauty of a 3 year old - She's sweet as pie.

dont stress! it will happen

hdlb123

Relax. There is no reason worrying about something when you don't know if there is reason to worry.

TheAnie

I'm going to agree with the suggestions of getting your health in order simply because they say a weight loss of just 10% of your current weight will help you get pregnant. That's why I started losing weight was to try and help myself get pregnant. Twenty six pounds down and I'm still not pregnant. I'm onto my 16th month trying to conceive. I have no known fertility issues and no one in my family has struggled to get pregnant before me.

If you're not actively looking to get pregnant and have no family history, I'll agree: don't worry. I wouldn't say don't stress because that's pretty much just not going to happen. If you want something and are not getting it this will stress you out. haha. I actually get pretty angry when people tell me not to stress.

Katie3784

Have you ever tried to get pregnant, or have you always been diligent when it comes to preventing pregnancy? If you have not tried and failed, I don't think you should worry. However, once you are in your thirties, even early thirties, it becomes harder to conceive your first child. I do not recommend having a baby that you cannot afford, but I also think it unwise to go on the assumption that there is a perfect time to start a family. If it is important to you, make it a priority, and do what you need to do so that you will be ready soon.

meramon

After getting married in '05, I also started thinking about babies. My husband and I had already decided to have a bit of 'selfish married time' first, so I continued with BC for another 3 years. For those three years, I had a little voice in the back of my head that said 'really? I've been on the pill since I was 16 and not even a close call...Maybe there's actually something wrong with me and it'll never happen.' PAH! I went off the pill in April, and we got pregnant the first month we tried. Poor husband! Two years later, we conceived again on the third try (a bit tougher with a 1-year-old around the house). Just knowing my story, I might be tempted to say 'it'll all work out.' Unfortunately, my best friend was married for 10 years, tried for 10 years and never conceived. Thankfully, she has found mommy happiness by adopting a 13 year old boy from a group home (I know, that almost never happens!). He's a great kid and now has a great family. I guess the lesson is that family is where you find it...

Best of luck, and congratulations on your marriage.

nikkilou1978

I also worried about not being able to have children. Having been married before and not trying, but not preventing, I never got pregnant. That was when I was 21. Now fast forward 10 years, I am now remarried. We started trying right away, it took 9 months of trying, then I got that hopeless never going to happen feeling. Then I was a week late, and wouldn't you know...I was indeed pregnant with my first child at 31 years old! Having been on birth control since I was 16, and going up to 6 months with no period, I thought it would never happen. That little guy in my profile pic is proof it does happen.

Just be patient, don't stress, and have fun trying!

Kathy077

I am 23 and got married this past September, i've gained about 65lbs in the past three years, and my periods have been skipping every other month, so it worries me too that I am so irregular and might have a hard time having children once my husband and I are ready.

We have the income and are building up our savings, paying down debt and trying to improve our credit scores and try to get a house before we have a baby. But I am in the same boat as you because all I can think about is having babies. Especially when literally all my friends around me are having children.

It is good that you guys are preparing, and i'm sure once you dont have the stress of wondering if you can afford things, you will get pregnant!!

jipsybird

Back in October my sister was telling me she was worried she couldn't get pregnant (she believes she has hormonal imbalances). Shortly after that she found out she was pregnant.

Personally, I got pregnant a couple months after getting married. Although I wouldn't trade her for the world, it would've been nice to have it be just the two of us a little while longer than that.

As others have said, it'll happen when it happens. Hope you feel better!