Why You Became so BIG?

mjmlodge

never had weight issues growing up. when i was 25 got into a blah relationship, friendly companion but no love. got an office job, had always been in active jobs previously so moving around all the time. depression, lack of activity, and eating like my bf made me balloon. i was so depressed i didn't notice my weight gain, seriously. it was when i was 29 that i realized i hadn't looked in a mirror for ages, got out of the shower and saw these purple streaks on my belly. that was the first time i noticed. here i am, slowly losing it, it's hard because i've never had to think about it before. so now, to calorie count, watch portions, do extra workouts- it's a blessing and a curse. :P good luck to you all!

hisgirl86

I've been trying to lose some amount of weight since I was about 14 or 15. Each year on my birthday I would say "by my next birthday I will lose "x" amount. And each year it would go up. First 30, then 50, then 60 and up and up as I would add to my weight instead of take it off.

I know that I used food as a friend, and yes that is very sad to admit. I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness, and even if you don't know much about that religion, you probably know that they are pretty strange. And I really don't want to get into all of the doctrinal stuff now, I just want to concentrate on how I dealt with every thing growing up.

JW's believe in staying seperate from "the world", so a person doesn't get side tracked from serving God. So they are pretty sheltered. Plus I was taken out of public school at 4th grade to start homeschool (a pretty common practice among JW's, which I have nothing against homeschooling as long as it doesn't alienate the child). So I was the sheltered among the sheltered. I only had a few close friends, and my only sibling is 10 years older than I am, so I spent alot of time alone, not really knowing how to fit in with people, how to interact with them.

I was very lonely. And I was very confused. JW's are taught that to doubt the elders and the direction from them is to doubt God, and anyone who has questions that aren't immediately "corrected in their thinking" is branded an apostate and disfellowshipped from the congregation. So any doubt I ever had I buried deep with in myself so no one would doubt my love for God.

Along with not being able to freely ask questions without fear, I was always taught by my parents to hide your true feelings. I'm not really sure how or why they do this, what has made them live this way, if its the religion or personal choice. But they have been in a strained marriage for 36 years because they rarely ever communicate about how they truely feel. They wait til all the bottled up feelings explode out of them in a rush and put blame on each other for the problems they go through.

So I was raised to hide true feelings, and not talk about what was wrong when I had problems with someone, and to never question any direction from people older in life. Needless to say I was a mess inside, but I thought something was wrong with me because I should'nt feel this way, but I can't talk to anyone about this since it will show weakness in my faith and mean that I don't love God, I'll be labled as an outsider and the few friends I do have will no longer talk to me.

I was a messed up kid, but not in the traditional messed up way you'd normally think.

I never knew how to deal with anything. I always felt like I just went through the motions of life, not really experiancing anything. I felt like the only thing I had control over was food.

No one was going to tell me not to eat, when I could eat, what I could or couldn't eat, that was my companion. When I got my license I would always stop by a fast food drive through and get something, because I could. It was my choice.

I loved knowing that I could sit in my car and eat and it was the one thing I had to myself. No one else had any say in it. It was pure freedom from the robotic exsistance I led. I was active, not much, or strict, but I would walk the lake, or do palates dvd, so I sort of kept my weight gain at a slow increase. It never got "out of hand".

Then I was diagnosed at 19 with Grave's disease, had a total thyroidectomy at 20, and immediatly I shot up from 170 to 200. At 22 I finally faced all the doubts I had about the region I grew up in and left it. I got married to a wonderful man, who though he tried to be patient and supportive, was not very understanding about what I was going through with leaving the cult of JW's. Anyone who has ever been in a cult and got out knows the emotional and mental turmoil that goes on, and how tight of a grip they have on your mind and emotions.

For the past three years I have worked through alot of my issuses, and I feel much more balanced and stable. My husband is my best friend, we have the relationship that I never knew was possible to attain. He is my rock and my wings. However, due to meds and thyroid levels I have ballooned to 260. I feel miserable physically, hate looking in the mirror, despise myself for being so far out of shape that I get winded walking into the next room, and yet no matter how much desire I have to get healthy, how much research I do for healthy living, I can't keep the motivation within my grasp. I'm not sure what the mental block is. I *want* to break through and be the person I want to be, the active, healthy, beautiful person I know I have somewhere inside, I'm just not sure how to get to her.

Jessb1985

I was a healthy weight when I put on 30 kilos (66 pounds) over two years because I found it hard to exercise because my heart was always going fast and I ate in an attempt to make myself feel better.

After two years I FINALLY (after numerous doctors and emergency room visits) found out I was born with congenital heart disease and had to have open heart surgery at the age of 24 to correct it. After the surgery I was still scared to exercise and get my heart rate up because I remembered how much I hated feeling before the surgery.

Fast forward 2.5 years and I'm much better mentally and physically and I've lost 15 kilos (33 pounds) so I'm half way there

Luckldy31

My unwillingness to change my habits... After injuring my ankle in volleyball, I had 4 years of surgeries...but ate the same as when I was playing volleyball 6 hours a day... then I found out that I had PCOS, had to have an ovary removed because of a tumor...stayed inactive, kept eating... and now I'm 22 with high cholesterol and almost 150lbs of excess weight... I've often tried blaming my problems on others...on life... but the only person to blame is myself. I need to make a change, and that's why I'm here.

wittlelacey

Very similar to mine! I don't want to blame my parents, but I must. All my life my parents have resorted to take out and fast food whenever they were too lazy to cook dinner. But honestly, their dinners aren't that much healthier to begin with. My mother would deny that we've always practiced bad eating habits-don't get me wrong, there were apples on the table. When when you're a child and a teenager, don't Cheetoh Puffs, Chips Ahoy cookies, Lays, Soda, Ice Cream, Candy, etc. seem more preferable? I come from a family where these things were always in stock, no matter what. My downfall originates from when I was 13. That's when I discovered the 50 cent Chocolate Pudding Pies at grocery stores.... these bad boys:

They're 500 calories each, and I was having one 4-7 times a week. On top of that, my dad would surprise me with a hamburger almonst every day before dinner. That's an additional 300-500 calories. I didn't start gaining weight until I was close to 15. Looking back, I realize I started to worry about my weight at a very early age-about 14. At 4'10, I was a size 00 when I was 14, I must have had a fast metabolism, because I did zero exercise, ate as terrible as I did and still maintained a weight of about 90 pounds! And I felt like I looked like a whale, even at such a small size. My mother started telling me I needed to eat better because it was getting noticeable. So many terrible comments came from the mouth of my own mom.

I'm a few years older now. I gained the weight slowly, but my highest weight was around 120 pounds, at 5'0 tall. I started MFP when I was at 114, and am now 106-107, looking to get back down to the 90's or a solid 100. It was and still is up to me to change my dietary habits as well as my fitness habits! While my childhood/teenage struggle with weight wasn't/isn't fun, it encourages me to ensure my children will never experience this.

Hearts_2015

bump to catch up on later:flowerforyou:

ChunkySpice

Like a few of you, I was a skinny active kid. I ate what I wanted, including an entire box of Mrs Paul's fish sticks, and it burned off right away. Then I hit puberty. I was an early bloomer and my body made me uncomfortable so I wore clothes two sizes too big to hide it even though I only weighed 115lbs at 5'2. When I was 15 my first real boyfriend took advantage of me. I failed classes and in general didn't give a crap about anything, especially myself. More baggy clothes. Then I realized the baggy clothes were getting snug. I gained 15lbs before realizing I got pregnant. (I miscarried. Please don't apologize. I was 15 and didn't want it.) The weight never came off after. Then I had a string of overweight or chubby chaser boyfriends and gained even more weight, with a 23lb loss after one of them dumped me. Moved back in with my parents who don't understand what a serving looks like, gained the 23 back + another 10. Lost almost 15 but then I got pregnant and gained 34lbs. Lost 30 of it but gained 25 back when I went on Depo. Went off Depo and immediately lost the 25, but got pregnant again six months later. Only gained 13 but I lost all of it right after. Went on Depo again and gained 10lbs so I quit it. My high was 238. I'm now 209. Until I hit 200lbs I really didn't even consider myself fat.

LilacDreamer

unfortunately i have weight issues because my body can only tolerate fruits, vegetables, carbs, and small amounts of protein.

I have a difficult time losing weight because, unlike 99% of the rest of the world...i have to strictly monitor my protein intake (no more than 25-30 grams). I can't just drink a protein shake, or eat "lean meats" (im obviously a vegetarian) or high protein meals.

I was also diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis at 18 (though who knows what age i actually got it at...i suspect around 12-13) so any chance i had of losing weight was basically shot to hell.

It becomes a lot harder to diet when your body works against you - and i've always felt very defeated...as if i am destined to fail.

My mother tried to make up for my medical disorder by giving me extra of the food that i liked and would always make the excuse that "cece is so limited in life, she cant have anything" [this of course wasnt helpful, ill admit that]

my father would ridicule me until i cried....for as long as i can remember. He knew all about my conditions, but he chose to use words like "fat ape" "gorilla" "chunky monkey" "tubby" "tub of lard" etc.

It got to the point about 6 years ago, where I just stopped eating. I limited my food intake to 1 large boston market mashed potatoes or half of a 6 inch subway sandwich, per day... along with lots and lots of Motts apple juice. I did that for nearly a year and lost 50lbs (huge for me). I came out of it very malnourished and was losing hair. thats why i stopped...my hair. But up until now, that is the only way i ever lost any weight.

I don't think i was ever a big eater. I get full pretty quickly and it can take me 2 hours to finish a meal (its suspected i have some sort of "slow emptying" gastro-issues). I won't call myself a victim, but i don't necessarily feel like i was given a fair shot, at all.

crimsontech

I think I was always a "chunky" kid... I don't have a lot of pictures to confirm this. But, my younger brother and sister thought it was funny to CONSTANTLY make fat jokes about me. And my parents were too young and too busy fighting over custody of us to care about our upbringing. My mom used food as a punishment (no good snacks if I didn't behave).

During my teenage years, I lived with my dad, and my stepmom was a horrible person. She was a SAHM to the three of us, her son from a previous marriage, and two kids she had with my dad. Though all of "her" money came from what my dad earned, she would rarely spend any of it on the three of us who weren't HER kids. She would feed her kids fast food all the time (yeah, they're screwed up in their own ways, but that's another story), and we would have to eat leftovers. We weren't even allowed to cook anything because everything in the cabinets she was "saving for a meal".

So, when I was 16, I got my first job (at Cinnabon, of course) and when I started having my own money, I easily spent 90% of it on food. I didn't have any bills except for bus fare (my dad wouldn't let me get my driver's license because I constantly fought with my awful stepmom and he was out working too much to know the real story) and I didn't buy myself clothes because I figured I was too fat to deserve to wear nice clothes. Actually, I still feel that way, so most of my stuff comes from Walmart even though I could afford better.

During the few early years when I worked in food jobs, I didn't really gain or lose any weight, so when I got a desk job when I was about 19, I made even more money and had a lot of disposable income so I spent it all on food. I would go to the grocery store and just fill my cart with anything that looked good. So, I went from a size 12 or 14 to size 18 over the next few years.

After I stopped working that job, I got together with my current fiance (this was 9 years ago) and he's heavier than me. We shared a love for food so, that's what we did. Shortly after we got together, I had a severe outbreak of eczema (allergic reaction on my skin) and I was prescribed prednisone, at too high a dose... so it makes your skin weak, makes you retain water, and it completely removed whatever makes you feel like you're done eating. I gained 50 pounds (from 230 to 280) in a few short months and started wearing size 26/28 clothes. Over the next 7 years, I gradually fed myself up to 340 pounds.

That's when I decided I was done with it. I was tired of not being able to fly without buying an extra ticket, and I was tired of not fitting into most restaurant booths comfortably. I picked up a book that had a great exercise-centered plan, and my fiance and I both went on it. It worked well for me... I lost 15 pounds in about 6-8 weeks, but my fiance wasn't getting anywhere at all. So, we lost interest and I've tried to maintain my caloric intake over the last year and a half, but I slowly put back on all the weight I lost, and a few more.

So, after a couple false starts, at the end of November, I started my journey at 343 pounds. A friend of mine decided to start a weight-loss bet with me. We weigh in monthly and for every pound we lose, the other person pays $10. At the end of December, I paid her $166 because she lost 17.4 pounds, while I lost 0.8. I bought a Withings scale, so I knew that I would make it back the following month because I had actually lost about 6 pounds of fat and gained almost that much in muscle in the transition from sitting on my butt all the time to being able to walk several miles without a break.

At the end of January, she paid me back $136 because I lost 13 and she gained 0.6. My friend fell off the wagon with New Year's festivities, but that's her story, not mine.

I am currently losing 3-5 pounds a week, and I'm super active and exercising 6-7 times a week. Between walking, hiking an awesome steep mountain trail near my house, and riding my new bicycle, I am transforming! I have dropped a pants size, my engagement ring is getting loose, and I'm looking forward to leaving the "300 club" in the next couple of months! Losing weight now is not something I do when I have time, it's the first thing I think about in the morning when I weigh in and it's what I think about most of the day. I make excuses TO exercise instead of making excuses NOT TO.

I loved reading all the stories on here, and I'll definitely keep checking back for more!

AntWrig

I loved Dunkin Donuts Ice Coffee's and Coffee Rolls.

mommasamfa

I became so big because of a lot of things in my life. I was molested when I was 6 or so and then for about3years ages 10-13, and beaten by my mom almost every day of my life from about 10-18 years old. I was raped 8 times in the winter of 2005/2006. I got myself in bad abusive relationships where I was put in the hospital, or I should have been in the hospital. I was also in a car accident when I was 15 (running away from my abusive mother) car hit me going about 65/75 mph shattered my pelvic bone (still breaks if I'm not careful of how fast I sit down or if I fall), tore my MCL/PCL in my right knee and broke the ball in my hip socket. I was in a wheelchair on and off for about a year, and then crutches for about 2 years. I've never been loved, mom always told me I was too fat for this or too ugly for that, so I just stopped caring what I looked like, because I'd always been told no one would ever want me.
I struggle every day with these thoughts and my PTSD, but I'm learning to love myself more every day.

kandyjay

Well, I definitely blame myself for becoming overweight. However, I've had no 'bad past' or anything stressful happen in my life for me to gain weight. I'm probably the happiest girl in the world, always smiling, always laughing. Just can't help it. So the reason I became bigger shouldn't matter. What matters is i've lost a LOT of weight, and i'm happy as can be! still have a ways to go, though

Chloe_P78

My wife and I fell into deep depression about 5 years ago.
So instead of using our extra money to fix the house and save for later...we ate at the Cheesecake factory every other night.
We thought we were eating well because the sandwich had chicken and avocados and tomatoes!
But....http://eatthis.menshealth.com/slide/worst-club-sandwich?slideshow=98441

WOW!!! that is my whole daily fat and cals in one sandwich! YIKES!

^^Me too^^ Scary thought that something so simple could be so evil. Perhaps my naivety is why I got so big!:blushing:

childofbodom123

I was a very promising footballer (Soccer person) so I was very fit and in good shape. Unfortunately when I was 15 I was diagnosed with Deep Vein Thrombosis and was on treatment for 8 month. Once I came off treatment I thought I was okay but over the next year slowly the mental effects of having something so serious really hit me hard. So I found solace in food and sitting playing games online to take my mind off things. Lost my chance for being a professional footballer because of the injury and just sitting thinking about the Deep Vein Thrombosis I got very paranoid that every pain in my leg was the DVT returning. Over the next couple of years I was diagnosed with Hypochondria, so I became almost a zombie just sitting having panic attacks and once more finding solace and comfort in food. I then met a girl as stories often go! At this point it had been 4 years since I had the DVT, I had gained 7 stone in that time becoming 19 stone at 19 years old. At 20 years old I was 20 stone and stayed that until 22. Then my girlfriend became my fiance and I saw a picture of us together. She is 5 ft 10 I am 6ft, she is size 10 I wore a 50 waist in trousers. She is 9 stone, I was 20 stone. I hated how I looked stood next to her and I also hated how I was watching such average footballers playing for big teams and I knew I was much better so I was determined to get in shape and show my fiance that the stories of football and me being good were true, so I started to try lose weight. 3 months into doing so nothing happened then I found My Fitness Pal.

It has been 14 months since I started on fitness pal and I am very happy with how I am doing.

I have lost near 6 stone. My trousers are now size 36 from size 50. I was an XXXL T-shirt I am now a Large.

Got about 2 stone to go till I reach my target but thats my story!

weightloss43154

mine started when i was about 12 years old, I was bullied all the way through secondary school, so turned to food as a friend, i would have pack up at dinner time, go home and have a cooked tea, then go to the house were i baby sat and have tea there too.

also meet my hubby at the age of 21 and was pregnant within a couple of week, so i left home and we got a house together, so then was incharge of what i was eating, it was mainly freezen packet foods and takeaways, I put weight on, when pregnant with my son and again when pregnant with my 2nd son.

over the years with learning how to drive and 2 more pregnancies, I have just get heavier and heavier and so has my hubby, so with been of high blood pressure tablets for nearly 15 years and there been a lot of diabeties in my family, I have deceided it is time to do somethng if i want to see my kids grow up and see my grandkids etc

nickyfm

Binge eating made me gain tonnes in a short amount of time.
Still struggling with it. Haven't in 6 days, but I usually struggle at day 11. Hopefully I stay strong, because I stopped for a month and lost stacks of weight, only to pile it back on again -.-

Chairless

I ate considerably more than i burned off for several years.

Miss_dannii

I was always that weight <

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until a few years ago when I got a car, and became lazy! I could always eat whatever I wanted and never put on weight, but I used to walk everywhere at that time and obviously that kept my metabolism up. Fast forward a few years and here I am, 21 lbs down and 50 to go! xx

weightloss12345678

Flat out I LOVE food, so eating steaks, ...etc and not even working out to LEAST counter the damage and over the years the weight slowly came on

JulieH3art

Mine started when I was about 15-16 I suppose.

Although I'd never been one of those incredibly skinny teens, I wasn't fat. I weighed 60kg up until 16, which is acceptable, even though it might be a *little* out of the norm for skinny kids.

Then I did an exchange year abroad and stayed with an elderly lady who had an extremely obese family. I ate like crap every day, and after 10 months with her I weighed 80kg. I looked terrible, but I had no idea myself. Then, six months after I moved back home I realised I was ginormous.

Over the next 6 months I lost 15kg, and my diet was basically "don't eat more than your skinny friends do".

Now I'm down to 57kg, and I want to tone and just.. feel good. I still feel fat. It's weird.

Anyway, I gained the weight because I was lazy and complacent with what I ate. I would get chocolate bars and Danishes every day at school, and eat tons of pasta and deep fried stuff for dinner. I even freakin' walked the family DOG to a bakery. Way to counter the walk itself, moron.

I'm an emotional eater at times. So I need to watch myself carefully. I only recently started up here and I'd love to weigh about 52 kg... But the actual kg's in themselves aren't important.

I just want to look in a mirror and feel skinny.