Bridesmaids

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  • annameier8706
    annameier8706 Posts: 417 Member
    I was originally planning on having my bridesmaids pay for their dresses, but I have realized if I do that then half of them won't be able to be in my wedding. They simply don't have the money. I also refuse to ask some of them to pay for their dresses while I am paying for others. So what I am doing is having a family member who was planning on "contributing financially" to my wedding pay for all of them. That way it's not techinically coming out of my pocket and they won't have the stress of worrying about finding the money.
  • hellotina
    hellotina Posts: 147 Member
    while i'm not married- i have been in about 4 weddings the past year.. all of which i had to buy my own dress/shoes/etc. dresses ranged from $90.. to one that with the sash it came to $200. i don't think you should have to pay anything towards their dresses.. they chose to be in your bridal party, they can buy the dress =)
  • LishieFruit89
    LishieFruit89 Posts: 1,956 Member
    The wedding I was in, the bride and her dad kept changing their mind on what they were paying for.

    We had to pay for our:
    dresses
    hair/make-up (if we wanted it professionaly done)
    nails (we had to have french tips!)
    flights

    They paid for:
    shoes
    jewelry (which another bridesmaid made)
    a cruise/lunch (which was awful food and basically a real estate tour on a man made lake by a Duke power plant)
    "hotel" (we slept on awful air mattresses in the "gym" in their basement)

    Yes, we had complete say in the dress.

    Whatever you do, make up your mind and stick to it. Don't keep flip-flopping like she did
  • Emily_Katherine
    Emily_Katherine Posts: 150
    Paying for the dress/shoes is usually part of the bridesmaid deal, personally I asked my bridesmaids for their budget ahead of time and paid the difference when the dresses were more. As far as shoes, I asked them to wear silver shoes of their choice.
  • Jenmccabe
    Jenmccabe Posts: 15 Member
    In my brothers wedding, everyone had to wear traditional thai outfits. We picked out the style and colors that we wanted to wear and helped out paying for materials to make the outfits. The only thing we didn't have to pay for was hair and make up. My mom designed and made all the dresses so we would be able to wear them again.
  • StrengthInPain
    StrengthInPain Posts: 155 Member
    how many bridesmaids are you having? when i was in my friend's wedding, we paid for the dresses, and had to get our own shoes (as long as they were silver, they were long dresses, so matching shoes didn't matter). The bride and her mother in law paid for getting our hair done and pedicures. The bride also made our gifts matching necklaces and earrings. There were also 8 of us in her bridal party so it would have been crazy for her to pay for all the dresses.

    However, I always said that if i only have one or two bridesmaids (for me, it'd be either 2 or 12 lol) i would pay for their dresses. For me it just seems that if those 2 girls are taken the burden onto their shoulders, i.e.. the shower, bach party, dealing with me, etc, that would be my way of showing appreciation. That's just my thought though.
  • Mirth
    Mirth Posts: 77
    In the first wedding I was a part of, the mother of the bride is a seamstress and made all our dresses from scratch. It didn't cost me a thing, but I made up for it by taking on a lot of the decorating responsibilities and what not to make it easier on the family. I also stepped in for a lot of maid of honor duties because the actual maid of honor (the bride's little sister) wasn't old enough to really understand what needed to be done. I also helped style people's hair and do their make up (these aren't the type of girls who put on a full face for anything but theatrical productions) for the wedding.

    When I was a maid of honor for another friend they paid for my dress because I was unemployed at the time. It was a huge gesture and made me cry my eyes out. When I got a job again later I repaid the mother of the bride for the dress and a few other things she had helped out with because she'd recently lost her job.

    I have another made of honor gig coming up and I am financially responsible for all my own stuff. Including a plane ticket to Italy.
  • KimmieBrie
    KimmieBrie Posts: 825 Member
    As the bride, I offered to pay for the dresses/shoes etc - and was refused. Also, I did not expects gifts from them, their participation was gift enough. I bought jewelry and gifts for them.

    One of my oldest friends asked I be a bridesmaid in her wedding... in addition to the normal costs of dress, shoes, etc... her cousin (MOH) wanted to throw her this posh shower at a very exclusive country club and expected me to pay approx. 750 dollars towards the cost NOT including the very expensive gift she wanted us to give. To be in that wedding would have cost me about 1500 dollars minimum - no thanks, I had to bow out. Yes, I COULD have paid the 1500 - but I wasn't about to. What her MOH was asking of everyone was rude, selfish, and over the top. She also went to the PARENTS of the bride and groom and they had to donate about 1000 each toward the shower. Ridiculous. So glad I stayed out of that one! My girlfriend was livid when she found out after the fact.
  • tabatha_burris
    tabatha_burris Posts: 167
    Im only having a maid of honor and she is paying for own dress but I told her to get what she wanted as long as its yellow! I want her to feel comtable standing in front of everyone. She knows what looks good on her better then I do. :happy:
  • Ekoria
    Ekoria Posts: 262 Member
    Heya, I let my bridesmaids pick their own dresses and in doing so they each paid for their own. I felt a bit bad for it but I bought my bridesmaids dress for a friends wedding so I think all my friends were all pretty cool with the idea by the time my wedding rolled around. I guess as long as your not demanding they buy a really costly dress and your friends are understanding it should be fine :)
  • healthylifewealthylife
    healthylifewealthylife Posts: 100
    In my wedding they paid for their own,as long as they have enough notice,they manage to get it done.When is your wedding?
  • aprilgicker
    aprilgicker Posts: 395 Member
    I can't imagine friends being hurt how you go about your special day if they find out.



    I have a situation like this now, my Fiancee's sister pretty much demanded she be in our wedding and is now complaining about the dress I like and everything else we are doing. She also doesnt understand why she has to pay for her dress and other things, she feels we should pay for it all. It kills me cause all I want to do is tell her, if you have an issue with it dont be int he wedding but its his sister so my hands are kinda tied

    you should look at my previous post on the first page. this should help you remember who is having the wedding. And she should defiantly pay for her dress.
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