Anyone else upset with the people they live with due to lack

xxxtwix

I'm married to the sugar plum fairy. He eats and drinks his weight in sugar everyday.of.the.week. If he lost any more weight he'd blow away in the wind never to be found again. And he's lived this way his whole life. When he goes to the corner store for a candy bar he comes back with a dozen. On the other hand I have gotten him to eat salad and a few other occasional vegetables. Scary..

I have 5 teenage kids. Essentially I cook for me, him, and them. I used to be upset, but then I figured that was a waste of precious energy.

cmeade20

I believe in to each their own. My house is loaded with junk. I make the choice not to eat it. And yes easier said than done. I've had many moments struggling not to eat the Doritoes on the counter or whatever else is there. And I've lost some of those struggles. But just because I want to be healthy and be slender doesn't mean I have the right to nag my mom into eating the way I do. I don't tolerate people giving me grief over how I eat, I won't do the same to others.

itgeekwoman

What I've noticed is that people who don't like to eat healthy--usually guys-- are extremely proud of it. You'll be sitting there eating your salmon and vegetables and they'll look you in the eye and say "Mmmm!" over and over while scarfing down plate after plate of bacon, biscuits, doughnuts, Oreos, buttered rolls or potato chips.

Then they wash down their 80 medications with coffee, and go on their merry way.

Are you married to my husband????? I ate Stuffed Chicken Breasts last night and he had a large lasagna with meat sauce. He smokes like a chimney and takes his cholesterol medicine and acid reflux medicine regularly. I refuse to cook two separate meals though. He doesn't like what I'm cooking, he can make himself a sandwich. I bought the lasagna, but refused to open the package and put it in the oven for him.

No more. I'm getting healthy if it kills him!!!

fteale

People do things in their own time. I have lost weight and been doing this for 14 months now. My husband only just decided to start eating healthier 2 weeks ago, so for 14 months I've been doing it while he brings home fruit juice and eats chocolate and cheese and biscuits every evening. Interestingly I seem to have set an example for everyone else I know, though. 2 of my 3 sisters have started running (though they were already very thin to start with), my best friend joined here about 6 months ago and has lost the same amount of weight as me, and now hopefully my husband is joining in too.

applejacks1552

Totally understand! I have felt the same frustrations.

It would be much easier to diet and exercise if my husband was 100% on board. Once you get married, it's hard not to be influenced by the habits of your spouse. But hopefully that goes both ways and we can start to be a positive influences on them while not taking on too much of the bad influence they give back? I give in now and then to the bad influence, but everyone deserves a break now and then anyway.

But I have seen a few rays of hope over the last few months that perhaps my hubby is getting more interested in his health - he signed up for a health program at work all by himself!!! He is doing better with eating more healthy or at least better portions without my prompting. It's hard to keep my mouth shut, but I'm doing it. Nagging only brings out the stubborn in him.

The one thing that gets me the most is he doesn't exercise at all. He makes up LOTS of excuses why not . . . I know it's not always fun or perfectly comfortable, but isn't that part of being an adult? And I know some people hate treadmills/ellipticals, but that's what we have available for free in our home and how hard would it really be to just watch TV or listen to music and walk (slowly even) for 10 min on the treadmill?

I am biting my lip though . . . I'm not going to nag, I'm not going to nag . . . (chant this to myself a lot lately)

It's his deal and hopefully he will make the decision on his own someday when he is ready.

Keeping my mouth shut and letting it go! But glad I'm not the only one who feels the frustration sometimes!

yoashisme

I feel where your coming from. My whole family is big and my brother and mother are huge. I don't live with them but see them at least once a week and all they want to do is eat bad. My husband is underweight and it's crazy the amount o food he eats. He works it all off during work tho. He fixes peoples homes so he is always on the move. We have a whole self for his snack food. I put all his stuff on the bottom self so I dont see it unless I drop something. I have only been doing this for a little while but I am doing way better then I thought I would. I see that I do have more self control then I thought I did. My husband is sweet and wants me to be happy but in all honesty he rather I gain weight cuz he likes big women. I sometimes hate to know that. It's like always in the back of my mind. During workout I sometimes think well everyone else does care why should I finnsh but then I remember the scale. I have never been over two hundred pounds but it freaks me out to think I was one pound away from it. I always heard it was hard to get under two hundred so I never let my self get there. Although I have never been this close I have always fears it. Keep doing what your doing. It helps to have people on here cheering for you. I know when I think I want something to eat but I am not hungry I think of my Mfp friends and what they would say. They keep me in line and I love it.

smsinger75

I am lucky that my hubby is 100% supportive. And he recently decided to start losing weight and getting back in shape. So now we are working out together in the evenings before dinner. But he still has to have his Mtn Dew and occasional junk food. Which I have finally learned to ignore when he eats them in front of me. I am hoping in the near future he will further wean himself off the soda and choose to snack healthier. But I know it takes time and a preson has to make the committment on their own.

Hang in there!

IndyInk

I'm not aggravated when people decide not to eat healthy things or adopt my diet (except Dad, who refuses to drink water and winds up in the hospital dehydrated).

What's aggravating is (1) parading junk food in front of you when they know you're dying to have it and can't, and (2) the immediate dismissal of anything remotely healthy-sounding because it's assumed the food tastes terrible.

Example: I rent a mother-in-law suite in a house. A 4-member family lives in the other part of the house. We share the kitchen. When I moved in, the family was horrified that all my groceries said "Organic." They said, "Organic milk? Organic coffee? Organic spices? Do you just hate everything that tastes good?"

judy20in2011

What I've noticed is that people who don't like to eat healthy--usually guys-- are extremely proud of it. You'll be sitting there eating your salmon and vegetables and they'll look you in the eye and say "Mmmm!" over and over while scarfing down plate after plate of bacon, biscuits, doughnuts, Oreos, buttered rolls or potato chips.

Then they wash down their 80 medications with coffee, and go on their merry way.

Are you married to my husband????? I ate Stuffed Chicken Breasts last night and he had a large lasagna with meat sauce. He smokes like a chimney and takes his cholesterol medicine and acid reflux medicine regularly. I refuse to cook two separate meals though. He doesn't like what I'm cooking, he can make himself a sandwich. I bought the lasagna, but refused to open the package and put it in the oven for him.

No more. I'm getting healthy if it kills him!!!

I was just thinking that, I absolutely refuse to be a short order cook and cook different things for everyone. If someone else wants to take the initiative and cook then they can cook what they want, until then you'll get what I am making! Within' reason! I don't make anything out of the ordinary, but use whole wheat, don't add sauces, extra salt, etc..

sc1572

YES...college roommates

IndyInk

itgeekwoman: I'm not married. Roommates. The good news is I get to "fire" them every few years.

CapsFan17

My husband eats like a 5 year old, I'm talking PB&J doritoes and a hostess cupcake for lunch. So I put a basket in the pantry that holds all of his junk foods. If its out or on a shelf I will eat it, but don't go in his basket. I know its seems trivial that a basket makes that much difference but it really works for me. Good Luck! I hope you can find something that works for you.

jennifermcornett

My sweetheart will pretty much eat whatever I put in front of him, or at least give it an honest try! He's a good boy. He does get his little candy cravings sometimes, but he's trying to help me lose the weight I've gained since we started dating, so he mostly behaves and even works out with me! I never had that with my ex-husband.

WhiteCoc0

My hubby is forced to eat healthy, because I am the "chef" in the house and I write the grocery list(s). Although he does sneak in a few bags of chips, They seem to disappear somewhere..."I thought you ate them all!" (as I shove the bag quickly into the garbage). He drinks pop outside of the house, bc I wont allow "junk" in my house anymore since I gave up anything else for Lent.

akgrown4

Mine is a totally different situation, fiance tries to eat like me, and he keeps losing weight, when he is already a healthy weight

samhelen

I really don't have that problem at all -- when we got married 8 years ago my husband never ate veggies, he grew up in a house where theire idea of vegetable were canned sweet potatoes and mexi-corn now however, he asks for vegetable based meals on a regular basis and his fav. thing to go out to eat for is Thai food. Now, when my inlaws visit, I do all the cooking and they eat what I put in front of them. I've even gotten my MIL to try foods she's never seen before -- pretty much everyone around me has conformed to what I'm eating but like other posters have said, I go out of my way to create lower calorie, higher nutrient versions of all the foods I love -- no one really cares if its low cal/low fat if it smells and tastes good. Granted, if you're living at home with parents, etc. its much harder to feel like you have control over your own diet when the people shopping aren't on-board so to speak.

ElizabethRoad

My hubby is forced to eat healthy, because I am the "chef" in the house and I write the grocery list(s). Although he does sneak in a few bags of chips, They seem to disappear somewhere..."I thought you ate them all!" (as I shove the bag quickly into the garbage). He drinks pop outside of the house, bc I wont allow "junk" in my house anymore since I gave up anything else for Lent.

I feel sad for your husband. He is an adult and should be making his own choices. What would you do if he threw away your food?

Sarahbara76

My boyfriend is skinny and has a wonderful metabolism, if he gains weight he skips a meal or two and it's all gone just like that!
He and I just had a long talk about my diet foods because of my allergies there is not much "tasty" foods I can eat and he is feed up with it and bored,wants me to come home from my job that I work 64 hours a week at and make 2 dinners, one for him with "taste" ie cheese and butter and gluten. And then my allergy free foods.. I am so tired at the end the day he maybe eating more cereal a few nights a week.
:huh: Get this when I said I would like to eat chicken and veggies and a dairy free protein drink for dinner he says "Your not a bodybuilder your a receptionist, you need to eat more NORMAL foods because your not a bodybuilder" UMMMM What???:noway:

sunkisses

Nah, I don't care what other people are eating unless they're my children.

cyclerjenn

Same boat here. I have a BF, that hears the word "Diet" and then first thing he says is "Let's go get mexican". Then my daughter, who is 18, will bring home all my favorite old foods, mexican. Oh just the smell makes it really hard for me to stay on track. Since both of them are naturally skinny they just reply," I don't need to watch what I eat". So frustrating.

froeschli

My hubby will nag and complain about the food, lack of variety (but he won't buy imported vegetables, and there's so much in season, during a canadian winter), oh and my favourite: 'too much protein' - he's the first to have a sausage for breakfast, and eat an entire 13 ounce steak for dinner, but my cutting back carbs is making him eat too much meat. uh huh...

anyhow, besides the nagging, he's actually quite supportive, doesn't buy bread or potatoes anymore, and has his pasta when i am at work...

sunnyflower1177

Just know that u have to do it for yourself whether u get a pat on the back or not, that is my motto, I had to do it for myself and try to set a good example. We only have one body, we can't trade it in and if you be strong and keep up the good work, you can win them over, be encouraged you are making the right choices

kiminikimkim

My boyfriend is skinny and has a wonderful metabolism, if he gains weight he skips a meal or two and it's all gone just like that!
He and I just had a long talk about my diet foods because of my allergies there is not much "tasty" foods I can eat and he is feed up with it and bored,wants me to come home from my job that I work 64 hours a week at and make 2 dinners, one for him with "taste" ie cheese and butter and gluten. And then my allergy free foods.. I am so tired at the end the day he maybe eating more cereal a few nights a week.
:huh: Get this when I said I would like to eat chicken and veggies and a dairy free protein drink for dinner he says "Your not a bodybuilder your a receptionist, you need to eat more NORMAL foods because your not a bodybuilder" UMMMM What???:noway:

Well that just makes me sad to read this:(

My boyfriend is also skinny at 6'2" and 140lbs. He was the one who introduced me to the local farmer's weekly food basket. He is totally into organic food and won't eat processed or fast food. I, on the other hand, used to have a McDonald Cheese burger once a month with fries before MFP.

I am blessed, he cooks for me with my allergies in mind: wheat. He bakes the breads, made pasta with tapioca flour and make a lot of vegetarian meals. We eat meat 3 - 4 times a week. He's been really supportive.

The only thing that annoys me is when I pick up something to eat and he'll say, "Are you sure you can eat that? I didn't see you measure it"

kelseyhere

I deal with this daily, with my boyfriend, with my family and with my co-workers. At home my BF is also the guy who dismisses all "healthy" foods as gross, and sometimes rubs it in my face. My grandma comes from the mentality "you must clean your plate everytime, even when I give you seconds you didn't ask for." At work, we have fancy dinners where everyone orders appetizers, drinks and dessert. There's temptation everywhere, but the worst is at home with my bf. He also has a major sweet tooth and is always asking me to bake. I realized I can't change him, but he can help me with my goals. We agreed that he can keep buying crap, and I will keep baking for him, but he has to tell me "no" when I ask him to. I'm still learning to have will power over the cookie jar, so on night's when I'm not feeling so strong, I tell him I'm done and don't want to eat any more. It's easy to justify the sweets to myself but when he tells me "no" it's a good reminder why I'm doing this. It's not perfect obviously because he's not always around, but you just have to try to find something that will work for you. Sorry to say it, but this is going to be a challenge the rest of your life. There will always be people around who don't care about being healthy.

The other thing that I've found is it's usually easier to get people involved in a physical activity to change their diet. Often, once people start working out, they realize they need to change their diet too. Diet seems to come second. Maybe you can ask your family or at least one family member to walk with you one or two nights a week after dinner. If you make it a regular thing maybe they'll start to enjoy it, and get on board with the healthy eating too.

Sarahbara76

My boyfriend is skinny and has a wonderful metabolism, if he gains weight he skips a meal or two and it's all gone just like that!
He and I just had a long talk about my diet foods because of my allergies there is not much "tasty" foods I can eat and he is feed up with it and bored,wants me to come home from my job that I work 64 hours a week at and make 2 dinners, one for him with "taste" ie cheese and butter and gluten. And then my allergy free foods.. I am so tired at the end the day he maybe eating more cereal a few nights a week.
:huh: Get this when I said I would like to eat chicken and veggies and a dairy free protein drink for dinner he says "Your not a bodybuilder your a receptionist, you need to eat more NORMAL foods because your not a bodybuilder" UMMMM What???:noway:

Well that just makes me sad to read this:(

My boyfriend is also skinny at 6'2" and 140lbs. He was the one who introduced me to the local farmer's weekly food basket. He is totally into organic food and won't eat processed or fast food. I, on the other hand, used to have a McDonald Cheese burger once a month with fries before MFP.

I am blessed, he cooks for me with my allergies in mind: wheat. He bakes the breads, made pasta with tapioca flour and make a lot of vegetarian meals. We eat meat 3 - 4 times a week. He's been really supportive.

The only thing that annoys me is when I pick up something to eat and he'll say, "Are you sure you can eat that? I didn't see you measure it"

that is so awesome, your so lucky :flowerforyou: ..the last part tho about him asking if you can eat that would be like , Um really???:flowerforyou:

IndyInk

Nah, I don't care what other people are eating unless they're my children.

Dude. I'd care if people were eating my children too.

sunkisses

Nah, I don't care what other people are eating unless they're my children.

Dude. I'd care if people were eating my children too.

I re-read it the same way just now, too.

hiker282

I'm upset with people who try to put an entire sentence in the Topic line. Keep it short and sweet and make use of an elipse....it makes people curious