Please comment if you've felt like this too..

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Replies

  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    My heart goes out to you. When I was super thin people used to say things to me like, 'must be nice to not have to worry about your weight and eat what you want and always look good'....that was NEVER the case. I have NEVER been able to eat what I want and I've ALWYS had to exercise tons to maintain weight. I used to get irritated because my sister was one of them that didn't work out and she ate exactly what she wanted -all the while verbally slamming me for staying thin...and she had no idea how hard I worked at it and how deprived I felt all the time.

    I'm heavy because I gave up on working it for a number of years. Being on both sides of the spectrum I try to be sensitive to both skinny and overweight. We are all here for various reasons; some medical, some emotional. The self-consciousness is all in the mind-our perception of what we are. If you feel pretty you are pretty. Try to self-talk yourself into feeling skinny!

    Even if you are not one of them, there are people who are model thin and don't work at it. My SIL used to be one. Until well into middle age she was a size 0 despite eating anything at all, having two children, and never working out--at all. Then at about 45 her world came crashing down in that regard and in two years she ballooned to a size 14. Her solution is to ask everyone around her "What happened?" and complain that it's "not fair." Of course it's not fair, but it's no more unfair than people who didn't get 45 years of effort-free perfect body, either.
  • cprys8942
    cprys8942 Posts: 99 Member
    Last summer we joined a pool near us for the summer and I spent nearly every weekend there with my daughter. I was wildly out of shape - not that I am in shape now. Growing up, I swam competitively for years and around a pool, I am most comfortable in a Speedo. Now I am not talking a banana hammock, but kinda like a boxer brief type of suit.

    I started the summer wearing that under a big surfer-type suit. I would take off the surfer suit to swim my 500 yards and put it back on because i was embarrassed by my gut covering a good portion of my suit. About mid-way through the summer I decided that this was stupid and gave up the surfer suit to revel in the half hidden looks of disgust that came my way.

    I swore I would use that as motivation to get in shape by the end of the summer. That didn't really work, lol. I gained weight.

    I wore what was comfortable for me. Even if it meant I knew folks were giggling. But it was a long time before I was strong enough to not really care.


    I feel the same way about wearing a bikini. Even in a one piece or tankini I feel self conscious. Thank you though and good luck(:
  • cprys8942
    cprys8942 Posts: 99 Member
    Not sure if this helps, but guys don't see weight, guys only see bikini.



    I wish I could believe this but when you are overweight and although this is embarrassing to say...when you have cellulite and stretch marks...trust me, not only guys but girls notice too.
  • hiker282
    hiker282 Posts: 983 Member
    Hell no, this never makes me depressed. It makes me so happy when it starts to get warm because I can do all the things I want to do without freezing my unmentionables off. Hiking, biking, swimming, geocaching and whatta galore! I don't care what anybody else looks like, unless they're hot. Then I'll stare as long as possible without being uber creepy and go about my business. Smile! Be happy! The sun is coming out! If you're jealous of the way they look, change the way you look! You can do it!
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    Not sure if this helps, but guys don't see weight, guys only see bikini.

    That comment is probably true, but I have ugly stretch marks and loose skin that doesn't look pretty and even if it didn't bother other people, I would not be confident about showing it to others.

    I still stand by my "just be grateful for the warm weather" comment, though. No need to compare yourself to others - just be the healthiest, most fit and active YOU that you can be.
  • cprys8942
    cprys8942 Posts: 99 Member
    Hell no, this never makes me depressed. It makes me so happy when it starts to get warm because I can do all the things I want to do without freezing my unmentionables off. Hiking, biking, swimming, geocaching and whatta galore! I don't care what anybody else looks like, unless they're hot. Then I'll stare as long as possible without being uber creepy and go about my business. Smile! Be happy! The sun is coming out! If you're jealous of the way they look, change the way you look! You can do it!



    haha don't let anyone catch you staring, it could get awkward. Thank you though!
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    I've shed a massive amount of weight and am fit and healthy by any standard, but I still can't rock a bikini.

    That's okay, though. Rather than get depressed that other girls look better, I'll just be grateful for warm weather that allows me to get outside and be active.

    I agree with what you have said because I am not attractive--at any weight or fitness level. I just don't see a need to cover up every inch of me just because I'm not Jennifer Aniston (gorgeous and fit), or Queen Latifa (gorgeous and overweight).
  • britexmom
    britexmom Posts: 145
    i live in texas, routinely at least 5 texas cities are in the top 10 fattest cities in the country....the whole state could pretty much stand to go on a diet, so no i dont feel bad at all.
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    Hell no, this never makes me depressed. It makes me so happy when it starts to get warm because I can do all the things I want to do without freezing my unmentionables off. Hiking, biking, swimming, geocaching and whatta galore! I don't care what anybody else looks like, unless they're hot. Then I'll stare as long as possible without being uber creepy and go about my business. Smile! Be happy! The sun is coming out! If you're jealous of the way they look, change the way you look! You can do it!

    Of all the things I protect from the cold, I mostly protect my unmentionables. It's my toes and fingers I worry about frostbiting!
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    Not sure if this helps, but guys don't see stretch marks. Guys only see bikini...
  • cprys8942
    cprys8942 Posts: 99 Member
    i live in texas, routinely at least 5 texas cities are in the top 10 fattest cities in the country....the whole state could pretty much stand to go on a diet, so no i dont feel bad at all.


    haha I'm moving down there!
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    Not sure if this helps, but guys don't see stretch marks. Guys only see bikini...
    I'm pretty sure they see loose skin, though. That's hard to hide.
  • Zombierawr
    Zombierawr Posts: 95 Member
    In all honesty, I used to feel this way. I mean, my sisters are all 90-120lbs, and even at my skinniest, I was 140ish. But I had a car wreck three years ago that really put everything into perspective, especially when my now 7 year old brother stood up for me when some kid didn't understand why I was wearing shorts in the pool (honestly, still hate wearing swim suits.) Find outfits you like yourself in, and keep on pushing!
  • clairification
    clairification Posts: 71 Member
    Oi, I feel you for sure! Heck, I feel that way in jeans and a sweater! But I'm working on it. I've always been my harshest critic though, even when I was thin I was afraid to wear shorts because I thought they looked bad...now I look at pictures and want to smack the skinny me :tongue: Whenever I get down on myself, I remind myself that this time I'll be thin AND fit, which I've never been. I'm working toward being healthy and strong. It will take a while, yes, but I will get there-and when I do, I wont be the skinny-fat girl I used to be. I'll be a sexy toned calorie burning machine! :laugh:
  • downhomechik
    downhomechik Posts: 47
    I walked on my own because I felt self-conscious and didn't want the whole gym to stare at me. When I started telling me friends what I was doing -one or two would join me now and then and we got into a walking frenzy. Now is the perfect time of year (here in Spring upstate NY) to get walking if its something you are into.

    When I felt a bit more in shape I started on the treadmill at the gym...

    Remember 30 min 5 days a week and 30 minutes doesn't have to be all at once.. A brisk 5 minute walk makes only 25 minutes left to do! Five minutes up and down a stairs...now down to 20 min and it goes on and on. Don't need fancy equipment or tapes to work out. I used cans for weights lots of times. I was never a gym type person - still am not.

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