Struggling with self image..

FitinFiveMonths

I've lost a total of 30 pounds over the last year. At my heaviest I was 200 pounds on my last birthday and now I weigh in at just above 170 pounds. Although I notice a difference in clothes fitting, how light I feel, how much longer I can run/exercise, the compliments, ect, I feel like my mind hasn't caught up with my new and changing body yet.

More often than not, I still see flabby thighs, drooping arm flab, a building stomach, tons of cellulite, a double chin, it's terrible! People are telling me how great I'm looking and how they can really see a dramatic difference in me since last May but I sometimes I feel just as self conscious as I did at my heaviest.

Does anyone have any tricks to helping your eyes and mind catch up to your new looks? Or a way to improve self confidence (I know it comes from within, but any tips will help!)?

girlnamedlee

Replying because I'm in the same boat & want to hear those tips to. I just realized today that I genuinely believe I'm the same size I always was, I just happen to fit into smaller clothes. It doesn't make any sense & I know it.

tz2187

I feel the same way!

DataBased

Just love yourself. You're a work in progress, just like me and everybody else I know. You deserve your best, so accept yourself as you are right now. That way, you can accept the changes as they come. You're doing GREAT - give yourself that acceptance and that victory!

FitinFiveMonths

Replying because I'm in the same boat & want to hear those tips to. I just realized today that I genuinely believe I'm the same size I always was, I just happen to fit into smaller clothes. It doesn't make any sense & I know it.

Ah! I'm so glad someone feels the same way! I'm down a whole two pant sizes but I just don't think I feel like I should. Everything is still so jiggly, I felt like I had less cellulite when I was 200 pounds! I know I still have 25 more to go before I reach my goal, but I'm over half way there, shouldn't I feel so much better?

Snow__White

i feel the same...i still reach for the big sizes when i go shopping...they dont fit anymore,but something my head keeps telling me im still big!

BPayton27

I struggle with the same thing. I have not found a way for my brain to "catch up" yet, but I'm working on it. I've lost over 50 lbs and I still buy clothes at my old size. I am hearing the compliments and praise, but then I get a peak of myself from the side or at the gym and I think "I've not changed at all." Keep up what you're doing. You're not only losing weight but you're becoming healthier, and that's what's really important.

We've spent so much time being over weight that our self esteem has undoubtedly been effected. I guess that's why everyone calls it a "journey." This is so much more than weight loss.

thatlook

i hear what your both saying!! its like you still have as i call it your 'fat head' on!! although at the moment i can see the difference and am pleased with the results im seeing i am wondering how i will feel another 40lbs down the road, so am also replying to see what others say! :flowerforyou:

CoryIda

I posted almost this exact same topic a couple of hours ago:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/517792-how-do-you-help-your-brain-catch-up-with-the-rest-of-you

There are some good suggestions in there. I don't know how well they will work since obviously I am struggling with this as well, but I am going to try.

Pifflesmom

This :flowerforyou:

Just love yourself. You're a work in progress, just like me and everybody else I know. You deserve your best, so accept yourself as you are right now. That way, you can accept the changes as they come. You're doing GREAT - give yourself that acceptance and that victory!

_AllieCat_

I struggled with that feeling too. About 5 years ago I dropped 60 pounds and still felt like the "fat ugly girl" even though I had lost so much weight. It is tough adjusting to your new body but all I can say is to focus on how good your new body feels and try to think positively. Try to remember how you felt when you were heavier and remind yourself how wonderful you look and feel now in comparison.

I hope you find bodily peace.

FitinFiveMonths

I posted almost this exact same topic a couple of hours ago:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/517792-how-do-you-help-your-brain-catch-up-with-the-rest-of-you

There are some good suggestions in there. I don't know how well they will work since obviously I am struggling with this as well, but I am going to try.

Wow! Thanks, I'll be reading this later on. Congrats on your huge loss!

itgeekwoman

I've lost over 40 lbs and feel exactly the same. I look in the mirror and see "fat me". Even though I know that I've lost weight, it's noticeable and I understand that my brain hasn't caught up with me. Part of being heavy and losing the weight is the psychological aspect of why I ate what i did and getting through that. My fat was my armor. It was what made me happy, because I didn't make myself happy.

I'm getting there.. I look at myself and am positive. I get a new outfit and really try to look good so that I feel good about myself. It's super important to not wear the baggy clothes, but show off that new body you have!!!

Love yourself. Give back to yourself!!

Lorichr

I know what you are saying. I can feel great one day and fat the next. We are our own worst critic.

drema2370

I am struggling with the same thing. Down 23lbs but still dont feel like I am seeing results even though people around me can see the difference, I do not. My clothes are fitting looser and even bought some undergarments a size smaller I just dont get it. Maybe one day my mind will catch up with my body. I think it will take time for my mind to realize that there are big changes going on. Good Luck to you all in your journey.

FitinFiveMonths

Just love yourself. You're a work in progress, just like me and everybody else I know. You deserve your best, so accept yourself as you are right now. That way, you can accept the changes as they come. You're doing GREAT - give yourself that acceptance and that victory!

I suppose I've always stubbled with self esteem issues, so being so big and then being smaller in the course of 9 months is a hard adjustment, sometimes I see myself in the mirror and think 'damn, look at that babe!' and then other days I hide in sweat pants and hoodies. Its such a back and forth! Thanks for the encouragement, I really appreciate it!

aimeerocksx3

I was in this boat at the beginning of the year. I came out of my funk by actively seeking out blog posts, images, and video online about self esteem. I have a few favorites, and I would share, but tumblr is over capacity right now.

And you've got to realize every body is a beautiful body.

ksmith2187

I cannot wait for my mind to catch up with my body...

i think im looking more forward to that than reaching my UGW. cause really what is reaching that UGW without the mindset to go with it?

FitinFiveMonths

I know what you are saying. I can feel great one day and fat the next. We are our own worst critic.

By far. I feel like I'm much too honest with myself when other's are not. Such a day to day battle for me too.

FitinFiveMonths

I was in this boat at the beginning of the year. I came out of my funk by actively seeking out blog posts, images, and video online about self esteem. I have a few favorites, and I would share, but tumblr is over capacity right now.

And you've got to realize every body is a beautiful body.

Ahh, it's so funny that you mention tumblr, I keep trying to refresh to get to my blog, and it's not working. I currently run a weight loss blog and it's helped so much. MFP helps with the technical, but I relate to the girls on Tumblr more so far

And it's also funny you say that every body is beautiful because I see girls that are bigger than me and they have the most beautiful curves, or girls who are the same size and i think they look kickin. I guess I need to start thinking of myself that way too!

hailz840

In my opinion the best way to overcome this, is to look at yourself as a complete package from top to bottom. When you buy a car do you look just at the doors and boot? No, you look at the car from roof to wheels, bonnet to boot. People are the same, when they look at you they are not just looking at your thighs or whatever your problem area may be, they are looking at your from head to toe, smiling face to shoes.
Once you learn to appreciate this I hope you can change the way you think. Remember to look how far you have come too and only compare yourself with yourself not with others.
I hope this helps someone

Amy911Gray

I'm less than 40 lbs to my goal now. I'm still feeling like that...

I was pretty invisible at 245. I'm not invisible now, but I still feel fat, and I still feel like hiding. And I still cant fit into my clothes, but I'm on the too big side instead of the too little side.

I'm also missing my clothes a lot. I'm not a shopper, I'm a saver. I really dislike shopping. My pants are 14's and they look terrible--time to go down a size but I can't get my mind around that either.

I think it's about changing a lifestyle that included frumpy and isolated. Turning to a lifestyle with smiles, and comfortability in our own skin!

Guess it's time for weight training!

FitinFiveMonths

I struggled with that feeling too. About 5 years ago I dropped 60 pounds and still felt like the "fat ugly girl" even though I had lost so much weight. It is tough adjusting to your new body but all I can say is to focus on how good your new body feels and try to think positively. Try to remember how you felt when you were heavier and remind yourself how wonderful you look and feel now in comparison.

I hope you find bodily peace.

Oh thank you! My goal is to actually lose 60 pounds in all, so this is really relatable to me. And thank you, I also hope I do.

Caffeine_Addict

When I was at my lowest weight (75 lbs ago) I still felt really self conscious and fat. Now when I look back at those pics I wish I realized I looked sooooo much better. blah. I'd like to know how ppl make their brain catch up.

FitinFiveMonths

I'm less than 40 lbs to my goal now. I'm still feeling like that...

I was pretty invisible at 245. I'm not invisible now, but I still feel fat, and I still feel like hiding. And I still cant fit into my clothes, but I'm on the too big side instead of the too little side.

I'm also missing my clothes a lot. I'm not a shopper, I'm a saver. I really dislike shopping. My pants are 14's and they look terrible--time to go down a size but I can't get my mind around that either.

I think it's about changing a lifestyle that included frumpy and isolated. Turning to a lifestyle with smiles, and comfortability in our own skin!

Guess it's time for weight training!

I went from a 14 to a 12 and I was bouncing off the walls, I was so happy! But now the excitement of that has worn off and all I want to be is a size 10. And I was hoping weight training 3 to 4 times a week would help me tone up, but it's like I'm at a stand still. I just upped my weights and really challenged myself this week, so I'm hoping that I see some results sooner than later.

FitinFiveMonths

In my opinion the best way to overcome this, is to look at yourself as a complete package from top to bottom. When you buy a car do you look just at the doors and boot? No, you look at the car from roof to wheels, bonnet to boot. People are the same, when they look at you they are not just looking at your thighs or whatever your problem area may be, they are looking at your from head to toe, smiling face to shoes.
Once you learn to appreciate this I hope you can change the way you think. Remember to look how far you have come too and only compare yourself with yourself not with others.
I hope this helps someone

That helps a little. Next time I look in the mirror I'll look at everything not just the problem areas

blakejohn

It gets better 6 years ago I was 250 with high blood pressure, I didn't want to die before I turned 40 so I started working out know 6 years later and I'm totally a different guy I can hang with kids half my age and it didn't take 6 years at the end of the first year I felt better so by the second year my attitude began to change, now it's the opposite I border on cocky, hang in there kid where the body goes the mind will follow

Package02

I think sometimes it's harder to change the mental than the physical. Especially true if you've been seeing a certain image in the mirror for so many years. Pretty much just like with every thing else in life, time will make it better. Just keep concentrating on the progress that you've already made and realize how much closer you're getting to your goal. Try to stay focused on the positive and not so much on the negative

FitinFiveMonths

It gets better 6 years ago I was 250 with high blood pressure, I didn't want to die before I turned 40 so I started working out know 6 years later and I'm totally a different guy I can hang with kids half my age and it didn't take 6 years at the end of the first year I felt better so by the second year my attitude began to change, now it's the opposite I border on cocky, hang in there kid where the body goes the mind will follow

I'm hoping so! I'm just worried that I'll always be self conscious! I'm hoping that the compliments get through to me eventually

FitinFiveMonths

I think sometimes it's harder to change the mental than the physical. Especially true if you've been seeing a certain image in the mirror for so many years. Pretty much just like with every thing else in life, time will make it better. Just keep concentrating on the progress that you've already made and realize how much closer you're getting to your goal. Try to stay focused on the positive and not so much on the negative

Thanks, I'll try my hardest!

froeschli

i had that with my skinny self, until i noticed i was up a few sizes and couldn't pretend anymore...

half the reason is that you're there all along, and since the change is slow, you don't really notice it. people who have more distance, or don't see you as often, are wowed by the change they see.

how to help that, i don't know.. it seems unrealistic to suggest not looking at yourself for two months

but you did well, and your brain will catch up at some point...