I have an overweight little girl

fiftyandfit

Our son is 11yrs old and a chubbabubba....
It's up to me to provide the healthy food for him to choose....
we both cleaned out the pantry, fridge and freezer, went to
the grocery store and chose yogurts, fresh fruit/veggies,
no sugar added popsicles and fudge bars, graham crackers,
and fruit snacks(not the healthiest, but a twice a week treat)
We have at least 2 veggies at dinner w/ lean meat and a
whole grain rice or boiled potatoes. He is not allowed to play
on the computer or watch tv until I get home. He has outside
chores and plays outside until it starts to get dark. He's happy
because he was part of the decision/shopping process. We
talk about being healthy, not about being FAT....
Hope all of our input helps you out........
Pam

ahubacek

I echo what some of the above posters have said about helping her become more active. Do things together (hiking, bike rides, playing basketball) to make working out more fun rather than making her feel like she's doing something wrong (or setting her up to think she's fat).

mseraf713

Your obviously a good father because your intentions are in the right place, but I agree with everyone else- you shouldn't put a child on a diet. And growing up as a chubby kid, then turned obese teenager then an obese adult who had a family with the best of intentions, I can speak from experience. Encouraging her to be active is the best step, and you should show by example.

I swallowed the pill from watching the YouTube video "sugar- the bitter truth" and now I firmly believe that excess sugar consumption is the leading cause of obesity in North America. the doctor on the presentation suggested for kids to lose weight is to trade 1 minute of active play for 1 minute of tv, and cut out all sugary beverages (including 100% juices) for water or milk.

LatinaGordita

I'm not sure if she spends most of her time with you or mom, but I think the first thing to do rather than start counting calories would be to spend some time being physically active with your daughter. Make sure that whenever you can, the two of you go biking, walking, skating, hiking, whatever it takes to get her active. This age is so tricky because sometimes they'll grow over the next couple of years and the problem will at least partially resolve itself. I would think right now, simply concentrate on being a good example of physical activity and healthful eating and encourage her to be as active as possible. What you don't want to do is start pointing out that she needs to lose weight or count calories, even if she thinks that herself. It's just so easy to feed into the already shaky self-image of an adolescent. Instead, do it by example -- instead of telling her "Honey you really shouldn't have another sandwich" you can just use portion control yourself to show her what a proper plate looks like. If she should ask you about diet or portions, you can always say "Well this is what works for me" and that takes the pressure off of her. Hope I'm making sense.

^^^

This is great advice. I was overweight at 11 years old too. However my parents pointed out to me that I was fat all the time that it just upset me and and I ate emotionally. Do things with her that will keep her active, try to stay away from taking her out to eat. Cook healthy meals at your home together. So she can also learn to make healthy meals when she is not staying with you.

firesoforion

Instead of quoting numbers at her and making her obsess over food, why not encourage her to be more active? Take her on hikes, sign her up for field hockey, just get her moving. Changing the household eating to a more healthy and nutritious standard will be effective for the entire household. You can help her to learn about good foods and bad foods, but I would never ever tell a prepubescent girl to watch her calories. That is not something she needs to stress over.

Yes, yes, yes. Please don't have her watching her caloric intake and tracking everything at 11 years old. I think it's great to make her aware of healthy eating habits and encourage her to get active. It will help her just seeing you as an example of healthy living.

These.

BuffyEat2Live

I haven't read ANY of the replies, so I apologize if I am repeating something that's been said.

I started my obsessive dieting at around age 11, when I had put on some weight. If I had just waited a bit, I would have realized that a growth spurt was just around the corner and I was going to quickly gain about 5 inches of height and lose my baby fat before I was 12 and a half.

Please just let her be. She's a kid, and at that age, she's still growing.

georgina1970

Lead by example and show her the healthy way to eat and exercise regularly. Don't draw her attention to it, she'll just feel worse. For overweight children the goal is to get them to maintain their current weight while they are still growing. Be aware of the pre-puberty grow spurt as well. Girls who go through puberty early should not be compaired to their peers who haven't. (Health Professional)

Alex_is_Hawks

My daughter started emotionally eating in the last two years, it was controllable to a point as she was younger, meaning she would eat well with me and then she would balloon with her father, only to come home and eat well with me and lose most of it through regular activity.

however she's now diagnosed with extreme stress and anxiety and with it came a whole host of eating issues as i helplessly watched her turn to food as an emotional tool of coping.

we've made changes, i work at home now, so that she's not in the house without me (the controller) and an unrestricted pantry. (her step father wouldn't really watch the kids and in fact would encourage them to sit in front of the tv and eat rather than play so he could get "work" done. (meaning being active and social on facebook until I came home from work).

as stated in another post, i'm leaving that relationship as it is too unhealthy for her (and me) but in the meantime her pediatrician recommended that I put her in a personal wellness group for kids. It's a group for kids that is designed to help them be healthy, happy, playful and that teaches them activity and eating habits. it is NOT a diet. the idea of the group is that she follows the canada food guide for her AGE (coupled with height and body size).

the idea is that if she follows the food guide which is a healthy full sized child daily portion, she will no longer continue to gain weight but will grow into her current weight. it's working, she still has bad days, she still has anxiety and emotional eating, but she sees a therapist for that and is learning to listen to herself and her body about when she WANTS something for her tummy and when she wants something for her sadness/stress/anxiety/fear/etc....

it's not perfect, but she's more active and quite frankly, the food guide gives her a lot of options, and there are days when she struggles to eat everything, but has learned that those days come, and then the days come when she just blows it out the water and eats more than she's allowed, and that is OK, it's balancing out.

but to ALWAYS eat over the allowed guide, would be eating enough food for a teenager, every day, which she is not.

so she has her wheel counter, and she has the information of what is healthy and what is not....and we talk about it, every morning, it starts with breakfast and we slowly work through her day, planning her lunch to go with her to school and then seeing what's leftover for afterschool snack, supper and bedtime snack.

but SHE'S in control. And when she says, mom, I'd really like to have Chinese tonight, or I'd really like to have a treat tonight, we usually find a way to work it in, because as i keep telling her, a healthy diet has room for those days when you just do that, as long as it's not every day.

So long story short, don't put her on a diet, don't make her count calories, find out what the food guide recommends for your child to be eating right now and put her on that, let her have a full portion, let her have all she's entitled to have, and other than the occasional treat day, nor more than the guide....

And she will grow into her weight, she will lean out and she will blossom.

L

Bohohippy

At 11 years old, the weight will go away quickly if you just get her active. Perhaps start cooking healthy meals (ones that help both of you and are appealing to a child) and go swimming together, make her join perhaps a dance class? Theres tons of different oens, ballet, tap, dance, street dancing and so on. Gymnastic's is amazing for young girls, how about an after school sports class? It'll be good for future education too.

When I have children, my children will go straight into hobbies from a young age, football is already a massive thing in my life (my boyfriends passion not mine) so the boys (if not the girls) will be doing football practise most nights, girls I'll put into dance lessons and gymnastics, brownies or guides. I'll have animals, so they'll be active walking dogs, cleaning their animals out, and I always cook from scratch so they'll grow up with a healthy attitude to how to cook food

I'm also going to plan events (birthdays) around proper thing instead of meals and take aways which working at tenpin I've noticed a lot of moms do, lazer bowling and a fat burger and fries with lots of coke :S

psuLemon

I was chunky as a child. Here is what my mom did.

1. Stop fast food
2. Get lean meats more often
3. More veggies
4. Get rid of chips, soda and other unhealthy snacks from the house
5. Get your child outside more often.
6. Restrict video games/tv/movies/technology to raining days or only an hour a day (goes with outside/active theme).
7. One caveat to technology. If they love video games, get them xbox kinect or wii and only get them games where they move a lot. I had a friend lose 50 lbs doing dance dance revolution. He played it for 2-3 hours a day.

But never restrict calories. Children need it to grow.


In one year, I grew 4", lost all the fat and became skinny.

cramernh

My girl is 11 and has added a little too much weight the past couple of years. I myself have only started eating healthy the last few months and my wife, soon to be ex, has let her self gain alot also. The wifes weight was not a factor in our decision but maybe a result. I've never put pressure on either about weight. I heard my girl talking about loosing weight to the wife but the wife grew up skinny and everyone always brought that too her attention. The wife was telling not to worry about it but she she seriously needs to loose some pounds and become more active. My question is how valid would the numbers be for an 11 girl from mfp? I want to help her loose weight without pressuring her too much since she is very headstrong (stubborn). If I can show her numbers to keep up with I think she would eventually start trying to stay within the limits. Any advice would be appreciated.

You really should be directing this inquiry to your daughter's Pediatrician... He/She can determine what is medically right/appropriate. Please dont rely on MFP - this is not a medical site. Your inquiry pertaining to "how valid would the numbers be for an 11 yr old girl from mfp?" is definitely dipping into medical and really shouldnt be addressed here...

SueGremlin

My mom took chubby me to weight watchers when I was 11 (I remember gasping when the scale read 135!). I have been battling with my weight (and self esteem) for all of my adult life. I have always assumed I was not as good as people who were a healthy weight.

Do not tell her she is fat and do not put her on a diet.

catcrazy

I'm locking this thread now as there is the potential for you to receive bad advice and for it to turn sour but....

The figures on here would be useless, at best, for someone still growing and potentially dangerous, that is why under 18's are not allowed.

There has been some good advice posted. Your first port of call should be her Dr/paediatrician/health visitor (without your daughter) if you really are worried that it's something that being more active wont fix.

CatCrazy
MyFitnessPal Forum Moderator

ETA. The OP has contacted me and would like thank you all for the advice you gave.