Overweight kids...abuse???

zsaoosh

OK I just have to get it out there….I GET SOOO MAD when I see an overweight kid. I don’t care what people do to themselves but I hate it when grown adults abuse their kids to the point of sending them in the direction of health disease and ridicule. How can someone do that to their poor baby? Why isn’t this considered “abuse” in the eyes of the law? OK a candy here or there or McD fries aren’t going to hurt once in a while, everyone has to give in a little and enjoy but that isn’t the case when a 5 year old weights more than me and eating 2 cheese burgers, fries and a shake and can’t even go out and play with their friends. Other kids are so cruel, can you imagine what they will go through in their lifetime? We should care for our babies even more so then ourselves. How dare they!!!

UponThisRock

I'm training my son to be a heavyweight division champion powerlifter

jazzdspazz

Yea!! How dare those kids be fed and be happy when they're are thousands of kids dying from starvation, every day, wth America!!

k8blujay2

Probably because there are a lot of people who are ignorant and clueless when it comes to health... while it isn't much different than malnutrition, the fact is they are still being fed, albeit unhealthily. Besides, we don't really know what is going on in the household that is leading to the obesity... is it a single parent home, were the kid is a latch key kid and has free reign of the pantry... or maybe more like what I used to do when I was a kid.... I would take my baby sitting money (and granted I realize that you are probably talking about younger than 10) and would walk to the nearest store and by candy, soda and chips, because my parents wouldn't buy it, for myself. If kids are buying it themself, then who is ultimately responsible? The kids or the parents?

danascot

This is a complex issue. I'm not sure if I'd term it "abuse", but it is certainly unhealthy if kids aren't getting proper nutrition and exercise. And of course the emotional impact (being teased, low self-esteem, etc) is also sad.

Oishii

I think it can be a sign of neglect, more often than active abuse.

danascot

I think it can be a sign of neglect, more often than active abuse.

Neglect is a better word perhaps. Possibly lack of education, socio-economics factors, etc. If you drive into the city where I live there isn't even a grocery store within walking distance and if you don't have a car or have to take public transportation it is somewhat of a challenge (not saying this is an excuse, but it's easy when we "I" can look at others and think they should be more like me and adopt my lifestyle without knowing what their circumstances are.

BlessedShauna777

Yea!! How dare those kids be fed and be happy when they're are thousands of kids dying from starvation, every day, wth America!!

lol sooo true SMDH

shedoos

I'm training my son to be a heavyweight division champion powerlifter

And I'm training my daughter to out-lift your son.

k8blujay2

I think it can be a sign of neglect, more often than active abuse.

Neglect is a better word perhaps. Possibly lack of education, socio-economics factors, etc. If you drive into the city where I live there isn't even a grocery store within walking distance and if you don't have a car or have to take public transportation it is somewhat of a challenge (not saying this is an excuse, but it's easy when we "I" can look at others and think they should be more like me and adopt my lifestyle without knowing what their circumstances are.

Ooo... it is not fun going to the grocery store when you don't have a car... I did that during college... not fun.

zsaoosh

Yea!! How dare those kids be fed and be happy when they're are thousands of kids dying from starvation, every day, wth America!!

lol sooo true SMDH

Both are abuse and neglect. Die of starvation or Obesity...one is not better then the other

danascot

I think it can be a sign of neglect, more often than active abuse.

Neglect is a better word perhaps. Possibly lack of education, socio-economics factors, etc. If you drive into the city where I live there isn't even a grocery store within walking distance and if you don't have a car or have to take public transportation it is somewhat of a challenge (not saying this is an excuse, but it's easy when we "I" can look at others and think they should be more like me and adopt my lifestyle without knowing what their circumstances are.

Ooo... it is not fun going to the grocery store when you don't have a car... I did that during college... not fun.

Yep, I can pop into the store everyday if I wanted to pick up something healthy for dinner that night. It's a systemic issue, I don't think it will be addressed through punitive measures - but education, etc.

bcattoes

It saddens me. For the most part I don't think it's meant to be abusive. So many people just really are ignorant when it comes to damage childhood obesity can cause. Some actually think that they are showing love by giving children everything they ask for. Not just emotionally, but physically. Because it used to be so rare there is not a lot of clinical evidence yet, but as more becomes available it is becoming clear that parents who feed their children to the point of obesity are dong lifelong damage to their bodies.

And some are just lazy. They simply don't want to take the time to prepare healthy meals. There is always something more imporatnt to do. Maybe Amercan Idol is on.

tequila09

it makes me so so sad seeing overweight parents with overweight kids its just bad habits being passed down ugh

EBFNP

Abuse? That sounds extreme. There are many reasons why some children are obese/overweight. I was overweight as a kid since age 9-10. My mom was a single parent, and we barely had money. Plus, I was not very active since it was difficult for me to play or do sports since my mom couldn't pick me up from school activities since she worked a lot during my youth. In addition, I suffered from a mild depression as a teenager and isolated myself in the house that further caused me to gain weight. That doesn't even include the factors such as school lunches and puberty that complicated things. I think we need to be cognizant of the different factors that causes childhood obesity. Its a multi-factoral problem.

missigus

Ummm. ok, I guess I should be in jail then for abuse? Thats a pretty generalized and sweeping accusation to all parents with an overweight child without taking any other factors into consideration. I have a very thin- rail thin duaghter who eats like crazy and cannot gain weight she's 13 and weighs 75 lbs, and is perfect for her tiny bone frame. On the opposite side I have a very BIG 15 yr old son who is large boned 5'11 and 245 lbs. Hmmm? Do I treat them any different? Do I feed him crap food and not my daughter? Nope. The difference is that he has metabolic issues. He has hashimotos thyroid disease. Hence slow metabolism- I know, I struggle with it as well. He has been to endocrinologists, dieticians, since the age of 11. I am very conscious of what he puts in his body. We eat healthy. We go on walks together. His cholestoerol is low, his blood pressure is low, he is healthy even though his weight is not. He is under a Dr.s care. That's abusive right? I don't care about my kid? Really?

To make unkind generalizations make me soooo angry! That is unfair. You have no idea what it is like- obviously to have children on opposite spectrums. It would be abusive on my part to say, no son you can't have that birthday cake but your sister can cuz she's skinny! Here eat a birthday orange instead. That's cruel. Moderation is key, not denial and obession. So don't go around assuming all of the heavy kids in the world are sat in front of TV's with a bag of chips and some candy bars.

Danhra

Personally I think the only reason this is a tricky question is because most people assume the original post might implicate them or their parents or someone they know. I don't think the original poster was referring to a slightly unhealthy diet or eating Kraft Dinner a few times a week bc the parents are too poor to always buy the good stuff. My parents did not raise us on healthy foods, and I wish they had bc a healthy lifestyle in adulthood would come much easier. That being said, my parents were not neglectful or abusive, they were extremely caring parents who just either didn't know enough about healthy eating/were low income/were cursed with extremely picky offspring. These are not the type of people the op was talking about Imo. On my son's first day of grade primary the parents all went into the class and were taking pictures and saying their goodbyes and there was a boy in his class who I noticed was large... Most likely heavier than me. I then witnessed his mother hand him his lunch for the day which consisted of a Large bag of doritos, a liter of pepsi and two chocolate bars.... This is the type of parent I believe the op is referring to, and if so then I would agree that this makes me extremely angry.

Saying that you can't call it abuse or neglect bc the parents may be poor or stressed out uneducated is bull. You wouldn't say that a parent who beats her child isn't abusing him bc she is a single, uneducated mother with a lot of stress to deal with so it is OK for her to take out her frustration on her child. You would expect someone to intervene for the physical and mental wellbeing of the child.

zsaoosh

Personally I think the only reason this is a tricky question is because most people assume the original post might implicate them or their parents or someone they know. I don't think the original poster was referring to a slightly unhealthy diet or eating Kraft Dinner a few times a week bc the parents are too poor to always buy the good stuff. My parents did not raise us on healthy foods, and I wish they had bc a healthy lifestyle in adulthood would come much easier. That being said, my parents were not neglectful or abusive, they were extremely caring parents who just either didn't know enough about healthy eating/were low income/were cursed with extremely picky offspring. These are not the type of people the op was talking about Imo. On my son's first day of grade primary the parents all went into the class and we're taking pictures and saying their goodbyes and there was a boy in his class who I noticed was large... Most likely heavier than me. I then witnessed his motherland him his lunch for the day which consisted of a Large bag of doritos, a liter of pepsi and two chocolate bars.... This is the type of parent I believe the op is referring to, and if so then I would agree that this makes me extremely angry.
Saying that you can't call it abuse or neglect bc the parents may be poor or stressed out uneducated is bull. You wouldn't say that a parent who beats her child isn't abusing him bc she is a single, uneducated mother with a lot of stress to deal with so it is OK for her to take out her frustration on her child. You would expect someone to intervene for the physical and mental wellbeing of the child.

THIS! I was not saying anything about kids with health issues (not due to over eating but overweight due to health) so people need to chill there. I am not perfect and I stated that in my first statement above about having to live a little and give in to candy and fries once in a while. BUT when a kid is unhealthy due to parents stuffing more and more food down their throat and not getting their kid out there to play and be active then I stand my my NEGLECT AND ABUSE statement. It makes me sick and I feel so bad for that child that doesnt know any better and when that is the parents way to "show love". There is no excuse and YES those people should be locked up for harming their kid in anyway. Poison: A substance that, when introduced into or obsorbed by the living organism, causes death or injury.

Johnnyswife

OK I just have to get it out there….I GET SOOO MAD when I see an overweight kid. I don’t care what people do to themselves but I hate it when grown adults abuse their kids to the point of sending them in the direction of health disease and ridicule. How can someone do that to their poor baby? Why isn’t this considered “abuse” in the eyes of the law? OK a candy here or there or McD fries aren’t going to hurt once in a while, everyone has to give in a little and enjoy but that isn’t the case when a 5 year old weights more than me and eating 2 cheese burgers, fries and a shake and can’t even go out and play with their friends. Other kids are so cruel, can you imagine what they will go through in their lifetime? We should care for our babies even more so then ourselves. How dare they!!!

I get upset when people ALWAYS lay the blame at the feet of the parents. I knew a girl who was large and even though her mom tired to make her workout and eat only the healthy food she served, she would sneak food after bed time and steal food at school.The first time I met her, she ate my lunch while walking to school and promised to share her lunch with me. Lunchtime rolled around and she lied to the teacher and I went hungry. Never happened to me again, but she would trick other kids, and when that stopped working, she would steal their food other ways.
her mom tired putting food away under lock and key, watching her, having her go to a therapist, but she always found a way to stuff her face with junk food.
Not sure where she is now or if she's overweight, but in her case, and a lot of other childrens cases, it can be their fault and not the parents. Other times yeah, its the parent who doesn't care or watch their child. Its not always the parent though.

JNick77

OK I just have to get it out there….I GET SOOO MAD when I see an overweight kid. I don’t care what people do to themselves but I hate it when grown adults abuse their kids to the point of sending them in the direction of health disease and ridicule. How can someone do that to their poor baby? Why isn’t this considered “abuse” in the eyes of the law? OK a candy here or there or McD fries aren’t going to hurt once in a while, everyone has to give in a little and enjoy but that isn’t the case when a 5 year old weights more than me and eating 2 cheese burgers, fries and a shake and can’t even go out and play with their friends. Other kids are so cruel, can you imagine what they will go through in their lifetime? We should care for our babies even more so then ourselves. How dare they!!!

It's 100% Abuse, YES!!!

k8blujay2

My thing is, is sometimes the parents don't have complete and utter control over their kids... especially when they reach a certian age... My parents couldn't control how much junk food I ate when I was 12-13... because I was making my own money babysitting.. I was within walking distance of a couple of stores... and since it was a safe area, my parents let me... I would always go in the stores to buy 'stuff' (whatever stuff a 12-13 year old desires) as well as junk food and sodas.... is that my parents fault? They couldn't stop me.... they didn't know how much I was consuming... Now, it's one thing when the parents are constantly driving their kids to mcdonalds because they "don't have time to cook" or it's "too expensive to cook" (which are both BS reasons, in my opinion).... but like others have said, there are a plethora of reasons why a child is obese and it isn't always because of their diet or their parents.

penrbrown

I'd call it more neglect as well. Sometimes not deliberate. I was an overweight child (180lbs by age 13 but always bigger then I should have been from the age of 9 and up!). I was overweight because I ate to ease stress... and there were no adults to monitor what I was eating because my parents were divorced and my mother worked pretty much all the time.

Yeah... maybe she could have monitored what foods were in the house and what foods I had access to but she had a lot more to worry about and had never learned things like proper nutrition herself!

So I don't think my mother abused me. Neglected? A little but in the circumstances it's perfectly understandable.

BAMFMeredith

Perhaps you should rephrase to say "morbidly obese children." My sister was an overweight child, she just didn't lose the baby fat for a long time. She played outside, rode her bike, ate the exact same way I did (we didn't have a lot of junk in our house) and only got fast food on occasion as a treat, just like me. I happened to be a scrawny lil kid until puberty and she was a lil chubby until puberty. We were kind of opposites, she got tall and thinned out, I stayed short and got curvy. Had nothing to do with poor eating habits or not getting enough exercise, it's just the way she was as a child.

Libby81

I think its more a sign of miseducation or lack of on part of both the parents and the children if they are old enough to be making their own choices. If the parents have a poor understanding or negative relationship with food/exercise, that is obviously going to have a knock on effect on the child. Situtations are often more complex than they appear from the outside.

G30Grrl

I'm training my son to be a heavyweight division champion powerlifter

And I'm training my daughter to out-lift your son.

I love this place.

Il_DaniD_lI

Ummm. ok, I guess I should be in jail then for abuse? Thats a pretty generalized and sweeping accusation to all parents with an overweight child without taking any other factors into consideration. I have a very thin- rail thin duaghter who eats like crazy and cannot gain weight she's 13 and weighs 75 lbs, and is perfect for her tiny bone frame. On the opposite side I have a very BIG 15 yr old son who is large boned 5'11 and 245 lbs. Hmmm? Do I treat them any different? Do I feed him crap food and not my daughter? Nope. The difference is that he has metabolic issues. He has hashimotos thyroid disease. Hence slow metabolism- I know, I struggle with it as well. He has been to endocrinologists, dieticians, since the age of 11. I am very conscious of what he puts in his body. We eat healthy. We go on walks together. His cholestoerol is low, his blood pressure is low, he is healthy even though his weight is not. He is under a Dr.s care. That's abusive right? I don't care about my kid? Really?

To make unkind generalizations make me soooo angry! That is unfair. You have no idea what it is like- obviously to have children on opposite spectrums. It would be abusive on my part to say, no son you can't have that birthday cake but your sister can cuz she's skinny! Here eat a birthday orange instead. That's cruel. Moderation is key, not denial and obession. So don't go around assuming all of the heavy kids in the world are sat in front of TV's with a bag of chips and some candy bars.

ok, some children are over weight by genetics but what I think the OP is saying... if your child is over weight it might not be the best idea to eat out at A&W every night. Child abuse? No.. bad parenting? absolutely.

clydethecat

my brother has always been fit and muscular, even when we were little kids. i was always chubby. the thing is, my brother didnt eat with wild abandoned, i did. my brother would make his Halloween candy last for 3 months, i would eat it in two days. my brother was always active, skate boarding and bike riding, i was always at home, watching tv. my brother made sure he fed his body with good foods, no matter what my parents fed him. i always ate too much, and then on top of that, snuck food after dinner and as snacks.

my parents were not neglectful, they werent abusive. they did fail in teaching us how to eat good foods, and how much an actual portion is, but they did what their parents did, only a little better. and on this point, my mom always tried to get us to eat vegies, i hated them since i was a toddler, my brother would always eat his. they did the best they could.

there was some laziness, when my mom was stressed or had too much to do, she would feed us jack in the box, and that started when i was 2 years old. but it was my make up, my personality that caused me to gain so much weight.

my brother and i were raised in the same household, but i ended up fat and he ended up with muscles and a lean body mass. i dont think that was entirely my parents fault.

grinch031

I really think the obesity epidemic is a national problem, and I really don't think we can count on each individual to solve the problem themselves. I think a top-down approach is the only way it will ever end. Researchers are trying to solve the problem with science. Whether its truly behavioral or physiological has yet to be definitively proven.

Obviously all the typical recommendations don't work in the long run, and there is more to it than people think.

So no in the average case its not abuse.

poncho33

Look at the price of food, some faimilies simply can't afford to eat the best. Plus with all the fake information out there, it's not always the easiest for anyone to know nutrition. I think we should worry about the starving kids before the ones that are plump.

Laoch_Cailin

I think I agree with the point of view that its lack of education on the parents side.

Sad story....I was at a childs cardio doc appointment (my daughter was born with heart problems), I was chatting to a lady who was morbidly obese, she said her daughter had heart problems from just recently and she didn't know why, I could have cried, her daughter of about 4 yrs of age was sitting beside her, I'd say she may have weighed close to 10st, she was eating a double sized mars and drinking a large bottle of coke. The mother really could not see the problem.

I really believe kids should be taught in primery school what healthy eating is and how to look after yourself

marynmarty

I don't know if I would call it abuse BUT I feel parent's aren't teaching their kids good eating habits. I also feel bad when I see young children who are overweight and what they will be going through as they get older. I'm a parent of 2 little girls and I have to admit I'm not always good either. I have a 4 year old daughter though who is the other way and doesn't really like to eat. She's under weight and we get talked to every time we go to the doctors. I'm trying to get her to eat healthier so maybe she would eat more. On the other side, I don't believe in letting a child eat whenever they want. There has to be structured times. I try to give her the three basic meals with 1 snack in between. If they grow up to where they watch their parents eat all the time or always each junk food (chips, candy, pop, etc) then they don't really have a chance. I use to be a huge snacker......now I'm not so much into snacking and every time I want to, I try to eat something good so my daughters don't look to me to get their habits and grow up overweight. In the long run it's helping our whole family :-)