Fed up with having my sis tell me to STOP working out!!

erineddy81

OMG!! I was just thinking about this today. I dont have issues with my sister, because I rarely get to see her, but my friends. I posted a pic on my FB and someone actually commented and told me to gain 5 pounds. I simply told her that for my height I am far from being underweight or under a healthy bodyfat %. I love it when people tell me Im wasting away or Im to skinny lol. Im just going 'screw you...you're just mad that I am doing something to not be overweight anymore.' People try to blow off my healthy eating suggestions because I look decent, like it happened by accident lol
I guess my point is don't worry about what others think and you go do the dang thing girl!!!

americaistoxic

It's easier to bring you down than to change herself. She's just saying things because she doesn't like herself.

kstep88

I really need to vent, so I'm apologizing in advance for my grammatical errors...

I'm so DONE with having my sis tell me I need to give it a rest and stop working out already. In the beginning, she was very supportive, always saying I'm doing a great job but more and more it's been nothing but negativity from her. I'm by no means starving myself nor do I look emaciated, so WHY is she doing this? I've explained on numerous occasions to her that my focus is not my weight on the scale but more my body shape (inch loss) and my health! I'm also focused on a having a nice tummy, and of course I know there is no such thing as spot reduction, so I continue to cardio & lifting because that's my goal... So NO, I'M NOT DONE!!

But she WON'T stop! Just yesterday, I was in my kitchen (my back was to her) and she says... Wow you're waist is so tiny (then she puts her hands on my waist) and says, I can feel your ribs... If someone were to give you a bodyshot, (as in PUNCH me in the ribs!!) you would pass out!... SERIOUSLY, who even thinks that?! Immediately, I turned around and said... "I'm proud of having a small waist now! I've worked HARD for this change in my body! Don't you remember me at 205lbs?" ... She then, touches my chin and says, aww look at your face (with this sad puppy look) :explode: ... By this point, I'm angry but trying to keep my composure.. So, I simply said, I'm not DYING woman! And I walked out... I don't understand, she's not overweight, but she is what many might call skinnyfat (IMO it's because she drinks ALOT)... she used to tell me she wanted to join me in my workouts, but now she calls me obsessed! I just don't get it!

We don't see eachother that often, but lately everytime we do, she's ALWAYS being negative. And honestly, the ONLY time she does compliment me, is when she's had ALOT to drink!

It feels really good to let this out and to whoever took the time to read this, thanks for "listening" I feel MUCH better! :flowerforyou:

Maybe she is jealous.

ninakir88

Yeah, def jealous.

MsBaby117

One word: Jealousy!!

Shake them haters off and keep it moving! You look awesome! :flowerforyou:

misrical

Doris, your sister is just insecure from the fact that she thinks you will/do look better than her.
A lot of people cant handle people wanting to improve themselves and sometimes this does include family.
Keep up the good work and don't let anyone bring you down.

kiminita

I bet the all the lifting you've been doing, and the drinking she does, really means that you could punch her so hard that you'd knock the wind out, and her alcohol-lathered muscles wouldnt be able to muster half the strength. Not to encourage violence. But I'm SURE that you're stronger than she is, especially if you said she's skinny fat. people dont realize that extra weight on you is not indicative in anyway of extra muscle. your shape and definition would speak to that.

sofitheteacup

I didn't look through the entire thread, but there's this line/image I keep seeing around pintrest that sums up how I feel about this: obsessed is the word the lazy use to describe the dedicated. 74 pounds is a lot, girl, you've done great. It's possible you've changed more about yourself than simply your appearance, and she's just now realizing that and adjusting and not really sure of things, I guess...? Actually, that sounds lame. I have a sister, and it's sad that she's reacting quite that way, I'm sorry. Hopefully she'll let it go or become more supportive. I would suggest being positive and maybe still inviting her along to workout and if she's really unhappy with herself (which others have mentioned) this will put the ball more squarely in her court.
But then hey, some people just don't get it. I wouldn't worry about it too much.
You look amazing, keep up the good work.

babigurl86

Just remember:

love it! so true she's obviously jealous,she thought u would give up....but you didn't! well done you! if she gets out of hand (again) say 'jealous?',or do what i do when people tell me not to lose weight cos my 'head is too large' (*kitten*!.....and breathe) *confused eyes* and say ''WOW'' then walk away slowly like their a creature u dont recognise......lol

kiminita

My sister is the same way...she is always making fun of me for measuring my food. She's huge. Like she could have another person inside her hanging stomach huge. But I always knew it was insecurity on her part. I only snapped at her once and pulled the weight card. I felt like **** after that. But she'd been pushing and pushing me. We've both always been big, but her more so. A couple months after the incident (and after I moved out of her apt--yes, part of the problem was living together), she mentioned to me that she had always thought of me as the prettier one. Lately, she's been cutting her portions too is visibly losing weight. It's nice to see. Goes to show you that what you do to improve yourself, other people WILL notice--for better or worse.

myak623

I know others have already said it, but it sounds like a touch of jealousy. I know it's tough when you don't get support from loved ones, but remember you are doing this for you.

You're doing great, by the way! Keep it up!

DorisR184

Thank you all so much! From now on, I'll definitely let it roll off my back. I've got to learn to accept, not everyone will be supportive. But my focus won't waver

Shock_Wave

Well if your sisters cute then I suppose I can take it for the team and give her a great work out and that will cheer her up! :laugh:

KPainter70

Have you ever just looked her straight in the eyes and flat out asked her why the changes you've made to your body bother her so much? I wouldn't be surprised if she was at least momentarily speechless.

Mdin1029

Have you tried telling her that it hurts you? Sometimes I get mad at people for doing things over and over again but I have never told them how much it bothers me. Just say something like "I know you don't mean it in a mean way but it really hurts that you are being negative about my hard work and I would feel so happy if you tried not to make those type of comments" Good luck! And congrats on your hard work!

peacefulsong

It's definitely jealousy, or maybe insecurity is more appropriate. Has she always been the thinner one of the two of you? If so, it's probably causing quite a shift in the dynamics of your relationship, at least in her eyes. You say she used to say she should workout with you but now says she doesn't need to when you invite her...that to me sounds like she's feeling inadequate, and maybe it bugs her that you would be giving her health advice or something. Or maybe she's actually worried that you'd show her up, so to speak, if you worked out together. She surely knows that you're in great shape. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, it's hard enough doing what you're doing when you don't have someone saying things like that. Hopefully your sister will eventually adjust, get over it, and realize that a fit and healthy you will be around a lot longer than an unhealthy you.

bethhyg

Sounds like she is jealous of your success. Maybe you are making her look bad.

funkycamper

Thank you all so much! From now on, I'll definitely let it roll off my back. I've got to learn to accept, not everyone will be supportive. But my focus won't waver

Good for you!

IMHO, just kinda ignoring it or making a non-committal comment like "I'll think about it" or something like that is the best course. When people are bullying and, yeah, she is acting a bit like a bully with you, they tend to keep it up if they know it has gotten under your skin. So: (1) don't let it get under your skin as you have total control on how you react to people; (2) if you let people control your feelings, you've given them more control than their entitled to; and (3) you will feel better afterwards for being the better person.

And, wow, you do look hot. I'd probably be a bit jealous, too. :ohwell: