what is wrong with me???

ChanlynMay

Why is it that even though I know just about everything there is to know about eating healthy and losing weight... I just can't seem to do it?? I do great for a few days and then it all goes out the window. I am so frustrated and upset with myself and still can't seem to get it together. Does anyone else have a hard time or is it just me???

debb1980

I can commiserate. I can't see to commit and the constant feeling of failure is making my poor eating even worse.

bcattoes

Why can't you do it?

fearie_jae

Nothing is WRONG with you! I know for years I tried to lose weight and couldnt do it and kept falling off the wagon.. but this time its just like a lightbulb went off in my head as to what i need to do. Some days are easier than others but I remember WHY i'm doing this and it helps me stay on track. If you want to add me, youre more than welcome to. Maybe motivating each other will help too!

dls06

Make small changes you can live with. Small changes are better then nothing. You need to do what works for you.
Keep logging no matter what. Good luck.

dexxie

I know that watching what you eat can be very hard. Until last year I was in the exact same situation as you and just couldn't imagine ever being able to keep it together long enough. I don't know if I can help you to be honest. What happened in the end is that I met my current boyfriend who gives me tremendous support to this day to mind my eating and we go to the gym together twice a week. Without him I know I wouldn't be where I am now weight-wise. I did a very intensive diet for 2 months where I just kept at it, really mentalizing myself that I just HAD to get through these 8 weeks. Once I did, I had lost 8 kg. Seeing such a huge result in such a short time is really what has kept me going. Now I really don't find it difficult to stay healthy and eat smaller portions. When I really crave something I either make it for my boyfriend and make myself a healthy alternative or just have a bite of it for taste. I think you just really have to have a mental 'click'. For me it took someone supporting me in my goals 24/7 (even if it meant I got cranky sometimes, he understood) and to be able to see the immediate effects of an actual diet. At the moment I have lost 15 Kg since I started Hopefully I will be at a healthy 79 Kg somewhere in the summer.

I don't know if this will help you at all but just know that it IS possible and you are not alone in your situation!

Good luck and keep your chin up

debrapeterson

When doing MFP I spend my energy looking for the foods I like that fit into the plan. I don't waist time on food I don't enjoy. I don't know if this helps but it seems to be working for me. I hope this helps.

ThinningDownChick

I think a lot of times people try to drop their calories too low or start up enormous exercise routines they can't keep up with. Start small, take baby steps, enjoy the journey- eventually you'll get there!

susannamarie

Don't draw the distinction between 'on diet' and 'off diet'. Work towards making every day a little healthier instead of trying to do the perfect diet and then not being able to stick to it. If you had a bad day and only maintained, that's one day that you aren't gaining more weight. If you had a bad day and only hit -250, that's still half a pound per week loss!

sindymartinez24

I was the same, I just started this program and i like it, I have a friend that encourage me to keep doing it, that's what you need, some one to be pushing you all the way, just like my friend does, If you want to add me you are more than welcome to do it. like this you'll have more friends with the same situation by your side....Don't give up...

almostfortysix

I totally understand. I had to have my husband remove bad foods from the house today and the SCALE. I do okay for a few days than I blow it. My husband is doing this with me and he gets more calories than I do so I struggle with dinner because I want what he's having but in order for me to lose weight I shouldn't have it. Then I feel deprived and bitter. OVER FOOD!!!! How crazy is that.
I think it's in my mind.
Keep on logging everyday and if you don't do well one day so what just keep on keeping on.

kristymccarrick

nothing is wrong with you its super hard i want to lose weight so bad i eat 3 meals a day and 2 snacks i work out at the gym every single day for 1 hr and walk when i can i eat no breads no pastas drink loads of water keep track of carbs, sugars, fats, calories on this site and jsut dont eat anything after 6pm i started on the 9th of this month(march) lost 13 pounds so far i really think exerscise the the key u can do it dotn give up i lost 13 pounds and u cant tell at all it takes alot of pounds to show i get frusterated all the time im so scared this wont work i got 74 pounds to go to my goal keep it up u can do it!!!!!

poedunk65

because you are weak. Maybe because you have no support system. You have no drive to go workout to inmprove yourself. You don;t think you are worth the effort or time to improve yourself. You have a poor self image.

These are all EXCUSES!!!

Get off your *kitten* and get to the gym. Cut out sugar and processed foods.

alisahaggard

I think a lot of times people try to drop their calories too low or start up enormous exercise routines they can't keep up with. Start small, take baby steps, enjoy the journey- eventually you'll get there!

What she said - If you're having that much trouble sticking to it, perhaps you set your goals too high for the level of effort you're able to put in at this point. Even a half pound a week is better than nothing if you can do it consistently.

akiramezu

because you are weak. Maybe because you have no support system. You have no drive to go workout to inmprove yourself. You don;t think you are worth the effort or time to improve yourself. You have a poor self image.

These are all EXCUSES!!!

Get off your *kitten* and get to the gym. Cut out sugar and processed foods.

exactly what i was going to say

alisahaggard

I totally understand. I had to have my husband remove bad foods from the house today and the SCALE. I do okay for a few days than I blow it. My husband is doing this with me and he gets more calories than I do so I struggle with dinner because I want what he's having but in order for me to lose weight I shouldn't have it. Then I feel deprived and bitter. OVER FOOD!!!! How crazy is that.
I think it's in my mind.
Keep on logging everyday and if you don't do well one day so what just keep on keeping on.

I guess it's important to define "blow it" if you still manage to land UNDER your maintenance level, you're still moving in the right direction.

douglasmobbs

It is all about motivation and what you truly want, not what you think you want because the logical side of you says it is what is best but what you want deep down.

For a lot of people, myself included, it takes thought and motivation not to eat to excess. I think that a lot of people who stay at a healthy weight without putting effort in make decisions about moderating their food intake without having to put much thought into it. For example after a big meal they will choose healthier options by default for the next day or two. For those who struggle with their weight they have to put in a conscious effort into making such decisions.

To this extent there is sometimes a massive gap between knowing what is good for you and doing it. Without the deep down drive to be healthier a long lasting change will not happen. To finish on a positive with that deep down drive and control you can change to a healthy lifestyle.

Yasmine91

Don't think of it as a diet that you have to suffer for, for a year or more, it is a LIFESTYLE change. I was doubting myself too, I always relied on restricting myself because I never thought that I could eat healthily and get my *kitten* off the bloody sofa. But I'm doing it, 13lbs down but I've still got more to go.

Maybe you're doing too much too soon, or thinking you're not losing enough. I used to expect 3-5lbs loss a week, but now I am so happy to lose 1lb a week.

Don't give up.

garita93

Nothing is WRONG with you! I know for years I tried to lose weight and couldnt do it and kept falling off the wagon.. but this time its just like a lightbulb went off in my head as to what i need to do. Some days are easier than others but I remember WHY i'm doing this and it helps me stay on track. If you want to add me, youre more than welcome to. Maybe motivating each other will help too!

^^^ This! I was the same way, was tired of being fat and unhealthy so many times ago but never really had it in me to do it! And one day, yes like a light bulb. It is an amazingly different feeling and when I feel the most discouraged, wow, I lots another couple of pounds but I am so tired. It is hard work! Do kid yourself, it will be the hardest thing you have ever done and the most rewarding too.

tdmcmains

It was really hard for me in the beginning too. Some things that helped me:
1) i had to schedule my workouts on my calendar or I just wouldn't do it.
2) the best kind of exercise is the one you will do. I just don't do gyms. I hate it so I won't stick with it. Find something you like doing.
3) I eat about 1600 cal a day. I would die on 1200 calories. I am losing weight slower but at least I can EAT.

You can do it. It's hard, but it is what it is.

singitella

It can help to change one thing until it becomes a habit. What is one thing that would move you in the right direction? Drinking a glass of water before meals? Parking further away at the store? Working out first thing in the morning to get it over with?

Another thing that may help is the "Before I ____, I have to _____ first". For instance, before I take a shower, I have to do 2 minutes of jumping jacks. Or, before I eat, I have to drink a full glass of water. Before I have a snack or dessert, I have to put one serving on my plate, then put the rest away and walk into a different room.

You get the idea. You can do it, but all at once usually doesn't work for most people. Remember to aim for progress, not perfection. Good luck!

19kat55

This is how it has worked for me. I am 56 and a life long yo yo dieter. Lose it, gain it back, lose it, gain it back and more. You get the drift. For one thing, we all want to make "lifetime" or "lifestyle" changes. However, when we start this journey that can become overwhelming to think about. I've done two things profoundly different this time and because of those two things I believe once and for all it has been changes I will keep after all the weight is gone. First off I have ate very clean. In the past I would exchange ice cream for Weight Watchers ice cream etc. You get the drift. Just substituted lower calorie/fat versions of the same foods. This time I have not done that. I eat whole grains, fruts, vegetables, low fat dairy, and lean meats. No crap. What this means is after getting through those first two weeks I no longer craved salty and sweet things. Now I crave FAGE yogurt LOL. The second thing I did is decided to take this journey one moment at a time, one minute at a time. I am an emotional eater and food addict. If I am having a particularly stressful time now I decided in this moment, right now, I am going to make a healthy choice of what goes in my mouth. No guarantees for tomorrow, that would be to stressful. But right now, in this moment, I can make a healthy choice. I have been making minute by minute choices now since October 1, 2011. This would not work for some people. And many would say "eat what ever you want, just eat it in moderation". But that is not possible for me. Once I go down that road, I will start making a bad choice in this minute. And then that will lead into the weekend. And then once a day. And then every meal. You get the drift. So find what works for you. For me it means moment by moment choices so I'm not overwhelmed with it all and staying away from sweet foods and salty snacky foods.

GemmaRowlands

I have been trying to lose weight for the past 10 years.. bear in mind I'm only 21 now. For most of the times I've tried to diet, I've lost maybe half a stone, and then eaten even worse to gain it back plus even more.

Last January, 2011, I decided enough was enough and started dieting. Since I started, I have lost 88 pounds, and have never looked back. The only one time I've had a week where I've gained was Christmas last year when I gained two pounds. Other than that, I haven't had a single blip.

I can't tell you what made me so motivated THIS time as opposed to all of the other times, but all I'm trying to say to you is that there is hope. I never thought I'd be able to lose weight, and here I am, a size 12 at last, just where I've wanted to be for pretty much the whole of my life.

momma3sweetgirls

Small changes as others mentioned.

Don't deprive yourself of treats; work them into your daily allowance or use as a reward.

Jessicaga82

I agree with everyone else maybe you started with too high of expectations. Start out with smaller goals you can achiever for yourself. Something like drink one soda a day then slowly lower it till your not drinking them at all. Don't know if you drink soda but that was just an example. I started out only doing 10 minutes on an elliptical but I idid it everyday till I could add more to my workout. You just have to start where you can and keep at it everyday. Maybe post some positive quotes around if you don't have anyone supporting you to remind yourself of why you are trying to do this. Good luck and just keep at it!

Anomalia

I have the same issue. Its just like everything else in life, practice makes perfect. You just have to keep trying and you will get better and better everyday.

wellbur

There is nothing wrong with you..... alot of us are the same. I think logging is an important tool to motivate you, it also scares you at the amount you would normally eat. MFP is a great tool also, chatting to people, looking at other peoples diary to get ideas on what to eat. Add me as a friend and i will help support you.

BaconMD

Problem is: you are human. You need to become a machine!

Init_to_winit

I have been thinking the exact same thing. It's like every night when I'm laying down to sleep I think, "tomorrow I will do better, I will work out, I will eat better". Then I just don't do it, I let cravings get in the way, I don't make myself work out, I think, I don't feel like it today. I lay in bed again at night and regret everything, get so mad at myself and tell myself that "tomorrow I will do better, I will work out, I will eat better". And again, I blow it, it's a viscous cycle.

I know there is not magic way to lose weight, no miracle drug, diet, or exercise routine. I know it's just a mindset and you would think after 5 years of struggling to lose weight I'd find that mindset but I just can't.

Good luck to you on your journey I hope you find something that works for you!

melanieparker13

There is nothing wrong with you. We all go through it. Take it one day at a time and don't beat yourself up if you slip....

Captain_Tightpants

I struggled with the same issue for decades. What helped me escape it was finally realizing that "diet" wasn't the answer. You have to aim to build non-deprivational habits instead. Deprivation just sets off a cascade of physiological and psychological dominoes so you end up fighting a losing battle every time.

You've got to gradually teach yourself to love real food (fruits, veg, lean meats, fish, nuts, whole grains) and gradually work away from things in a box, packet or tin. When you establish a love affair with real food you start taking a bit more care and time over meals and, oddly, they satiate you more too. I was hungry all the time when I was eating junk, but I can't remember being genuinely hungry at all since I started eating real food, even though I'm eating at least 1500 calories a day less than I used to.

Another thing is to get out of the mindset of certain foods being 'bad'. Sure there are some that probably should be avoided (trans fats for example) but they really are few and far between. Since I stopped being afraid of eating too many carbs, or fats, my cholesterol and triglycerides have plummetted, and my HDL to LDL ratio has improved greatly. Eat protein, eat fat, eat carbs - your body is designed to deal with them all. The only thing it's not designed to deal with is lab-made or processed stuff.

So yep, it's about redefining your relationship with food and eating, and finding a routine that is so satisfying to you that you can sustain it for life.