Will I ever feel like a sexual being again??

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  • ThePhoenixRose
    ThePhoenixRose Posts: 1,985 Member
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    I would guess that when you meet the right person, it'll change. You may not be there yet, and that's okay. just give yourself permission to feel it when the time comes. If he makes you feel safe and loved, the rest is sure to follow.
  • HMD7703
    HMD7703 Posts: 761 Member
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    Time. That is the cure. Honestly.

    Therapy may help, as may some sexual aides (vibrators etc). Once you begin to reawaken your sexual self, you will desire others again. People do not realize the grasp they hold on us and how the pain can rip someone apart. It is good that you have begun healing youself. As you lose weight, you could buy some clothes that make you feel sexy / attractive. Admire your changes in the mirror. Learn to love yourself again. And be open to love again.

    Best wishes on your journey. It will happen :flowerforyou:
  • leanne2376
    leanne2376 Posts: 217
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    I am sorry you had to go to through this terrible ordeal

    What is V thread btw ?
  • Bree1294
    Bree1294 Posts: 32 Member
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    Sherri,
    It's been 19 years since I too, was in a relationship where I had a similar situation. For me, I realized that I had to really concentrate on finding out WHO I WAS again as my personality and spirit were so broken. My advice to you is to concentrate on things that make you happy outside of food. Do you like to read, walk, take your kids (dogs) to the park, play games, etc? It is VERY hard to find that social being again after being degraded and belittle for so long. Trust me, people WANT TO KNOW YOU and it's okay to start trusting again. I say that with pie in my face as I still struggle with that one myself. I have less than a handful friends with whom I trust, and that's okay... because I have some, and I truly do trust them.
    The first thing you need to concentrate on is you, find out what makes you - YOU... then say to heck with that loser who didn't see you as the valuable and desirable woman that you are. YOU WILL GET THERE, my friend. Have faith in yourself, believe that you ARE WONDERFUL. Then before you know it, you'll see that you really start wanting that closeness and passion again. :)
  • SimplyShanRunning
    SimplyShanRunning Posts: 885 Member
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    Here you go:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/557644-men-and-women-proud-or-your-v-show-it


    hand-point-up-2.jpg
  • garita93
    garita93 Posts: 276 Member
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    Here you go:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/557644-men-and-women-proud-or-your-v-show-it


    :love:
  • Sinope82
    Sinope82 Posts: 108 Member
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    The short answer is yes (o:

    I was with my ex for 10 years, he was abusive mentally and physically and when i eventually made the break i felt exactly the same. At first i was happy on my own with my new found confidence and freedom and i had no intention of ever getting involved with anyone again. Why would i i would only get hurt and couldn't face the thought of being with someone physically. Then about a year after we seperated i started to think about what i wanted and realised i didn't want to be on my own for ever but i still couldn't ever imagine being with someone.

    Anyway I agonised over what i wanted for months and then when i'd about given up on ever feeling like i could be with someone again i met my new partner and guess what all those worries just dissapeared. I'm happy to say thay despite being terrified i could never be with someone again everything is brilliant between us in fact i'm happier than ive ever been !

    I know it's impossible but try not to worry and when you meet the right person it will just happen naturally x
  • sherri85
    sherri85 Posts: 148 Member
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    Thanks guys I appreciate all the advice!! And I checked out the V thread and WOW!!! I think it might be coming back to me :blushing:
  • Wreak_Havoc
    Wreak_Havoc Posts: 597
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    Thanks guys Im thinking therapy may not be a bad idea!! I never thought I would need a "shrink" lol but guess I do.. It sure couldn't hurt!! :wink:

    Don't think of it as a shrink. Think of it as someone who can help YOU understand how you feel by asking the right questions. And yes, EVERYONE needs to talk to someone at times. It'll get better! Love youself again before you try to love anyone else.
  • Wreak_Havoc
    Wreak_Havoc Posts: 597
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    Have you tried the V thread?
    He's not kidding. If that doesn't reawaken you as a sexual being, nothing will.

    Whew! I think I may need a moment of privacy now.

    ok, what is the V thread?

    TOPIC: men and women:proud or your V? Show it!!!!
  • NeuroticVirgo
    NeuroticVirgo Posts: 3,671 Member
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    I think if you find the right man it will work out. Feeling comfortable and secure around your partner makes all the difference.
  • Lesa_Sass
    Lesa_Sass Posts: 2,213 Member
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    Thanks guys I appreciate all the advice!! And I checked out the V thread and WOW!!! I think it might be coming back to me :blushing:

    This just made me very happy. :flowerforyou:

    And as far as other thing goes, I was so proud and thought I could do it all myself. One of the hardest things ever was admitting I needed help, once I did, it was one of the best things ever. I learned that I was not what he beat me down to believe I was and that it was not my fault, it was him and his insecurities that made him treat me that way. After all, if I was so bad, why did he want to stay with me? Try it out, give it a while too. At first I thought I knew more than she did, turns out, she really did know what she was doing. I also found that the longer I went, the more truth came out. I do not know if I was lying to her on purpose or lying to myself to protect me. All I know is, I am glad I reached out and got help, it is what enables me to have a happy healthy relationship today.

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