I lost weight for a guy

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Replies

  • Apa93
    Apa93 Posts: 57 Member
    If it gives you motivation, then that's all you need.
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
    I wouldn't cross the street for a guy (avoid one, yes. For them? no) but whatever.
  • leannems
    leannems Posts: 516 Member
    But isn't losing weight for a guy just really losing weight for yourself? Or did this guy say "I'll date you when you lose weight."

    I doubt he said that - so likely the person is losing weight because they think they'll be more attractive to the guy when they're skinny. Again - that's really more about yourself than the guy.
  • starcatcher1975
    starcatcher1975 Posts: 292 Member
    Did she mean she thought no one would date her if she was heavier? Or did she meet a guy and he told her she needed to lose weight if she ever wanted a ring?

    Sometimes I think when I lose weight I'll start looking around and dating again, not so much for the guy but because I'll feel more comfortable gettin' nekkid :wink: But if a guy told my to lose weight for a ring I'd probably wring his neck
  • poustotah
    poustotah Posts: 1,121 Member
    I lost weight for a guy too!!! He was so helpless and sweet and GORGEOUS! I loved him from the first time I saw him.

    He's also my son and when I was pregnant with him I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I was told that if I didn't do something soon I was going to harm my baby and myself. I was also told that I would be diagnosed with diabetes later in life too and that didn't sit well with me. So I changed it.

    And my little guy was what kicked it off.
  • Namaste1983
    Namaste1983 Posts: 603 Member
    I HONESTLY USED IT FOR MY MOTIVATION. I WANTED TO GET MARRIED AND HAVE KIDS, THEN ALONG THE WAY AFTER DROPPING 50 POUNDS I FELL IN LOVE WITH WORKING OUT. STARTED CHANGIN GTHE EATING HABITS AND IT SHIFTED FROM DOING IT FOR SOMEONE ELSE TO DOING IT FOR ME. IT FUELED MY FIRE AT THE START THEN MY LOVE FOR MYSELF KEPT IT GOING UNTIL I HIT MY GOAL :)
  • gympamela
    gympamela Posts: 188 Member
    I am attracted to men with muscle and if I want someone who is that hot, I better be getting that hot myself!
  • picassoadagio
    picassoadagio Posts: 407 Member
    That is the DUMBEST thing a woman could do for a man. Lose weight for yourself, not for everyone else.
  • Stylistntenn
    Stylistntenn Posts: 58
    If the guy only wants you if you are thin or have lost weight, he is not worth it. My husband has loved me unconditionally regardless of my size. I'm not saying DON'T lose weight, but if you DO, do it for yourself and for health reasons.
  • EllieMo
    EllieMo Posts: 131 Member
    Anyone who required me to change before they were prepared to be seen with me is not worth a second glance.
  • iAMaPhoenix
    iAMaPhoenix Posts: 1,038 Member
    I lost weight for a guy too...His name is Emmanuel! Does that make me a self-sexual?
  • Stylistntenn
    Stylistntenn Posts: 58
    I lost weight for a guy too!!! He was so helpless and sweet and GORGEOUS! I loved him from the first time I saw him.

    He's also my son and when I was pregnant with him I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I was told that if I didn't do something soon I was going to harm my baby and myself. I was also told that I would be diagnosed with diabetes later in life too and that didn't sit well with me. So I changed it.

    And my little guy was what kicked it off.

    I love this :smile: That's so sweet. My daughter is part of my inspiration as well.
  • Manjobug
    Manjobug Posts: 28 Member
    I know that I had people say that I would never attract a man at my size and that I should lose weight for that reason. I would starve myself and go on these stupid fad diets in order to try to meet everyone's expectations. Of course they didn't work and I never lost the weight. Contrary to what people said I met a man who loves me for who I am no matter what. However I finally found the right motivation through him because I knew I needed to lose weight for my health. He inspired me and motivated me, but in the best way.

    My thoughts are that the materialistic and vain motivations will never work long-term. You must have a better goal in mind in order for it all to work out. :)
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    *shrug* if that's her motivation, so be it. Can't stereotype everyone as being motivated solely for attracting a mate, though.
  • cocolo89
    cocolo89 Posts: 1,169 Member
    well it works for some. I lost weight for my husband in the beginning because I know when he first met me I wasn't so chubby and he deserved that person back. When I met my husband I was 130lbs, when we got married I was 138lbs, 5months after marriage I hit a high of 150ish lbs, when I got preggos (around the 6month mark) I was 146ish. After having our girl, my weight stayed around 175-178. We had only been married for 1.5yrs at this point and I know that this was NOT the person he married in the beginning and I needed to find that person again. After I hit my goal of 135lbs I realized the benefits of being healthy, and I began doing it for myself. I enjoy exercise and eating healthy. I am currently 123lbs and loving it. AND my hubby loves his new wifey :))
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    I know that I had people say that I would never attract a man at my size and that I should lose weight for that reason. I would starve myself and go on these stupid fad diets in order to try to meet everyone's expectations. Of course they didn't work and I never lost the weight. Contrary to what people said I met a man who loves me for who I am no matter what. However I finally found the right motivation through him because I knew I needed to lose weight for my health. He inspired me and motivated me, but in the best way.

    You found a keeper ;) Rockstar.
  • BowTieBaby
    BowTieBaby Posts: 8
    A persons partner should love them for who they are - not their weight.

    I met my husband 9 years ago when I was at my heaviest (almost 180). He went away to school and I started exercising. I got back to my high school weight of 115. Now I am heavy again and trying to get (and stay) at my HS weight.

    He has loved me fat and thin and everything in between.
  • sma83
    sma83 Posts: 479 Member
    I startd this journey because I wanted to be attratctive enough to get a man...that only lasted about a month. Once I realized that I felt better, slept better, had more energy and *heaven forbid! could it be true?* actually started to like myself, I totally switched to doing it for me. I AM worth the hard work. Im happy I had the "getting a guy" excuse for the motivation to start, but my motivation to continue is all about me!
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
    I've known girls who have lost weight, gained weight, cut or dyed their hair, gotten work done, changed their entire wardrobe and attitude, etc for guys. There's nothing wrong with that being an added reason to why you're losing weight, lord knows part of me wants it because I want to look the best for my guy and not feel like I'm not good enough (which is my train of thought, he's never said that to me) but it's not even half the reason why. If that's all you're doing it for, then some priorities need to be checked because either something's wrong with your relationship or maybe you're one of those damsel types that can't exist without a man. If it's the guy telling you to do it and it's not because he's worried about your health, I'd be packing bags.
  • ampa916
    ampa916 Posts: 189 Member
    I think everyone has different reasons for losing weight, and some might not be something we all agree is "good" but really if she was unhealthy before and is healthy now then I think it was a good reason! I am losing weight for "people" I am losing for myself, for my son, for my husband, I am losing to be healthier and to feel sexier. I want to have another child in the future but I don't want to have the high risks I had with my last pregnancy, so I am losing weight for that too.
  • chachita7
    chachita7 Posts: 996 Member
    There are certain things one must do for self and not anyone else... glad it work for her but if it hadn't perhaps she would have fallen right of the wagon and gained double the amount she loss...
  • InIt2WinIt
    InIt2WinIt Posts: 68
    I think the best motivation for losing weight is ME! I have always been the type of person, no matter how I looked, if he doesn't like me the way I am or think I am beautiful and sexy, I don't need him! I recently ended a 4 yr relationship, which had nothing to do with my weight, but he loved me just how I was; however, he was also a motivator b/c he knew how bad I wanted and he wanted me around for the long haul. We aren't together now, but I can never thank him enough for the workouts with me, eating healthy with me, etc.....he & I are still good friends, but he knows I would NEVER lose weight for anyone else other than EMILY!!

    Now whatever motivates someone else, no one can knock that -- if that's what it took for her, I congratulate her and just like the gentleman posted, hopefully she maintained the lifestyle upon getting her man!! :-)
  • Manjobug
    Manjobug Posts: 28 Member
    Thank you! I am a lucky girl. :)
  • jadedone
    jadedone Posts: 2,446 Member
    I think it is a bad plan. You should do it for you. Since you are the one who needs to maintain it. Of course we all know, that losing weight will open up a different pool of potential romantic partners since some people don't like women who are past a certain size. But doing it for you and becoming more "attractive" along the way is far different than doing it so some person will find you more attractive.
  • TadaGanIarracht
    TadaGanIarracht Posts: 2,615 Member
    I'm losing weight for many reasons....

    I'm losing for my son, so I can keep up. My family, to prove to them I can do it. My friends, to show they can do it too. My boyfriend, because I want to look good for him. My future wedding and not wearing a tent. And of course myself. I want to feel good about myself and my body.
  • Brannock8
    Brannock8 Posts: 170 Member
    It depends on what the motivation is. If someone is doing it to win someone back, or attract someone who wouldn't be otherwise, or something along those lines I think it is not a good idea. However, if someone does it for someone they are in a relationship with, because out of love they want to become the best, healthiest person they can for the one they love, I see nothing wrong with this.
  • rebeccap13
    rebeccap13 Posts: 754 Member
    I guess indirectly I'm losing weight for a guy.

    I know that I am unhappy with my current weight and that when I am in shape and healthy I am happy. In turn I fee like you won't ever be happy with someone else in a relationship until you're happy with yourself. So yeah, for the overall success of any future relationships including dating, friendships and working relationships, I am losing weight/getting fit.

    And who doesn't want to be the girlfriend that their guy is dying to show off?
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
    All those politically correct answer are cool and def loss weight for yourself and your health cause you will feel great , BUT I will say this when you go to the car lot to buy a car, the car is washed, clean inside, New tires and the fluids topped off. If you want a husband be the best YOU you can be. A lot of women out here try being a nickel and want a dime and end up old maids. <jumps off soap box>

    Preach preacha!
  • weathergirl320
    weathergirl320 Posts: 331
    im totally losing weight for my man. he didnt ask me too, but i was 112 lbs when we met and got up to 170. he deserves to have someone who is healthy and looks good.
  • kiters
    kiters Posts: 60 Member
    If you are happy with your size and your weight, I agree with the others....you shouldn't do it for a man.

    But if you aren't happy with yourself and he is your goal.....More power to her!
    My SO actually likes me with a lil extra weight but I'm still striving towards my goal for me! The skinnier me is just as awesome if not better lol

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