Rude comments and relapsing
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Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
I wish I had someone around like that to keep me from giving in. It's easier when you have other people who will dig at you when your eating bad.
Because I can and I want to. It's really none of your business why I did. I can have some if I want, and I wanted so I did. If I want something, I'm going to eat it. Everything in moderation, even late at night. It's not like it was soon before bed, either. I was up late after that.
It was just the way she had said it. If she didn't have such a trashy attitude, it wouldn't have bothered me. Instead of a "Ha, I thought you said you don't eat junk anymore" (which I never even said), she could have said something without an attitude, like "You should wait to eat that tomorrow instead of so late at night."
I still think she has a good point. Sorry I'm not on the feel good band wagon here. I'd say something too.0 -
I get the little snippy remarks just about every time I mention something healthy, exercise or eating "X" times a day, etc. They come from everywhere, family, friends and coworkers. Needless to say, I handle them much better than before but sometimes the smallest one gets under my skin. After a while, I just write it off to envy or jealousy and move on but it isn't always easy. I don't talk about fitness much anymore outside of my support group and it's sad really. You never know when you are starting to reach someone.
I try not to talk about health/fitness/etc. around people other than the people here and on my personal blog I run. I didn't even say anything to her about losing weight, eating healthier, or anything. My aunt just hears things from my family, like when my mom calls. "Daisy's lost 25 pounds so far! She doesn't drink soda, eats healthier, etc." And from that, she makes her own assumptions.0 -
Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
I wish I had someone around like that to keep me from giving in. It's easier when you have other people who will dig at you when your eating bad.
Because I can and I want to. It's really none of your business why I did. I can have some if I want, and I wanted so I did. If I want something, I'm going to eat it. Everything in moderation, even late at night. It's not like it was soon before bed, either. I was up late after that.
It was just the way she had said it. If she didn't have such a trashy attitude, it wouldn't have bothered me. Instead of a "Ha, I thought you said you don't eat junk anymore" (which I never even said), she could have said something without an attitude, like "You should wait to eat that tomorrow instead of so late at night."
I still think she has a good point. Sorry I'm not on the feel good band wagon here. I'd say something too.
Okay, well that's really not what I was asking in the OP, so I don't know why you replied to something I didn't ask. I posted this in the support area for a reason.
Edit
Eating it at 11 o'clock at night has nothing to do with anything anyway. And who cares if I have ice cream. It's no one else's business.0 -
And ice cream may not be heath food, but it is certainly healthy to allow yourself some pleasure in life sometimes. And if you need a ltitle ice cream at 11 pm, it's healthier than alot of things. And perfectly acceptable, especially if it isn't a habit.
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Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
I wish I had someone around like that to keep me from giving in. It's easier when you have other people who will dig at you when your eating bad.
Because I can and I want to. It's really none of your business why I did. I can have some if I want, and I wanted so I did. If I want something, I'm going to eat it. Everything in moderation, even late at night. It's not like it was soon before bed, either. I was up late after that.
It was just the way she had said it. If she didn't have such a trashy attitude, it wouldn't have bothered me. Instead of a "Ha, I thought you said you don't eat junk anymore" (which I never even said), she could have said something without an attitude, like "You should wait to eat that tomorrow instead of so late at night."
Nice job sticking up for yourself! Keep practicing and eventually you may be able to do it with your family too.
Good luck!0 -
I still think she has a good point. Sorry I'm not on the feel good band wagon here. I'd say something too.
Get off your high-horse. You're really missing the point here.
There is a difference between saying something negative like:
"Really? Junk this late at night? Ha, and you say you've been eating healthier and don't eat junk!"
And saying something positive like:
"I've seen you make heaps of progress and I know you know what you're doing. I'm proud of your progress!"
Anyway, the universal truth is this - what motivates one person can completely demoralise another.
But you said it yourself, you're not in the 'feel good band wagon' - so negative comments would work for you.0 -
I still think she has a good point. Sorry I'm not on the feel good band wagon here. I'd say something too.
Get off your high-horse. You're really missing the point here.
There is a difference between saying something negative like:
"Really? Junk this late at night? Ha, and you say you've been eating healthier and don't eat junk!"
And saying something positive like:
"I've seen you make heaps of progress and I know you know what you're doing. I'm proud of your progress!"
Anyway, the universal truth is this - what motivates one person can completely demoralise another.
But you said it yourself, you're not in the 'feel good band wagon' - so negative comments would work for you.
I really love this response. Thank you!0 -
Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
What? Firstly, what is wrong with eating ice cream? Secondly, what is wrong with eating it at 11pm? Or 2AM or whenever?
Agreed! If you are remaining in your calorie allotment then who gives a flying &$)!, I say mind your own business Auntie Know It All!0 -
Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
What? Firstly, what is wrong with eating ice cream? Secondly, what is wrong with eating it at 11pm? Or 2AM or whenever?
Agreed! If you are remaining in your calorie allotment then who gives a flying &$)!, I say mind your own business Auntie Know It All!
Thank you!0 -
Well said!0
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My dad made the comment "At least taking you out would be cheap, all you eat is salads if that." Ok yeah I went through a stage when i was 15-21 where I would try to not eat and I purged a lot. I'm trying to not be in that mind frame now. Comments like that make me want to go back to that for some reason. I told him I had fijitas a few weeks ago and he said "you eat that stuff now?"0
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My dad made the comment "At least taking you out would be cheap, all you eat is salads if that." Ok yeah I went through a stage when i was 15-21 where I would try to not eat and I purged a lot. I'm trying to not be in that mind frame now. Comments like that make me want to go back to that for some reason. I told him I had fijitas a few weeks ago and he said "you eat that stuff now?"
That sounds a helluva lot like what I've been going through!0 -
First, I want to say that you're absolutely stunning!
Totally Agree!!!0 -
I really don't think it's appropriate to make remarks about how someone eats. My stomach is my business! Sounds like with all the remarks you described her making to you and others that it's just how she is. So my advice to you would be: Don't expect someone with a history of rude comments to suddenly stop making them. It's probably only going to set you up to be disappointed. I wouldn't worry about changing her so much as changing your expectations of her. This mindset has really helped me in dealing with my family. Next time she makes her snide remarks you can counter with something like, "Oh, there you go again - being super supportive! Could you get any sweeter?" I find sarcasm spoken with confidence sends a strong message.
Incidentally, I'm at my goal weight (only had to lose 12 pounds though) and I've never deprived myself of an occasional treat. In fact I had ice cream today with my son and it was damn good! I also ran 4 miles today too so it all balances out. I totally understand some people think you should shun all sugar if you're trying to be fit or lose weight, but I don't believe that. To each his own! :bigsmile:0 -
But Auntie, some ice cream now and then helps me a lot to stay sane and you know... right now I really need that!
Get your ice cream, have a burger if you want one, enjoy life! The others are so right, as long as your overall intake is less than what your body burns, who gives a $#/T.
A few pound less might make you more attractive or pretty. But it's happiness that makes you shine and beautiful.
And discipline tastes a lot better when it comes together with ice cream :-)0 -
I'm not sure what I'm asking for--maybe a way to help boost my confidence after things like this? Maybe a way to forget about these comments? I'm not really sure what I want...
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message me and I will give you my number and you can text me anytime you need to talk0 -
Just laugh and say, "if you want, I can coach you on how to lose weight too, while enjoying a little ice cream here and there".
well said!!0 -
I have ice cream just about every night at midnight. You mean I can't do that?!?0
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Not being mean, but those comments have a good point.
If you are eating healthy and exercising, why are you eating ice cream at 11pm? I'd probably say something too.
I wish I had someone around like that to keep me from giving in. It's easier when you have other people who will dig at you when your eating bad.
It doesn't matter what POINT you think those comments are making: it's no one else's business or duty to police what someone else is eating (or someone else's body, etc).0 -
Oh girl! i am in the same boat. My mom was always having up and down weight problems as a kid so she takes it out on me i think. I love her to death but sometimes she will just be like..."you have really gained weight lately, i think you should watch what your eating". Or if she sees me go to the fridge or something she will be like "didnt you eat already?" That kinda stuff drives me crazy and immediately i get all "screw her im gonna go throw up then! see how she likes that!"..but i realized thats never the way to go. The best way to deal with that kinda stuff is to give it right back and then shake it off! When your aunt said that i would have been like yeah im eating something unhealthy..AND WHAT!? haha but mainly what i do is flip it around. When someone says something mean i hold onto it for a bit and then reverse it. I say well let me kick *kitten* so the next time i see this person they eat their words! Good luck!
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