Why are people so cruel

Ok mini vent too..This morning one of the girls in the office recieved a box of chocolate dipped strawberries from edible arrangements and decided to offer me one. Needless to say neither of us are skinny. There was a customer in the lobby at this time, Male with the stomache of a pregnant woman. So I selected one. The guy then says" you know if you eat that you will only get fatter than what you are" "You know men like skinny woman." I didnt reply because I like my job and the words coming out of my mouth wasnt going to be pretty. So I ate all my 140 calories strawberry and gave him eyes that could kill. He doesnt know me or my workout plans. What gives him the right to judge me on my weight? This is why alot of people have confidence issues dealing with there weight
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Replies

  • Livingbalanced
    Livingbalanced Posts: 84 Member
    He's just ignorant and rude. I understand you keeping your wits about you for your job but I don't think it's wrong to say that that kind of comment is unacceptable and that you don't appreciate those comments. He needs to be told that it's inappropriate and rude.
  • gemiwing
    gemiwing Posts: 1,525 Member
    Wow- sounds like one sad and obviously sick person. Sorry they hurt you like that- they were in the wrong.
  • rachelblank427
    rachelblank427 Posts: 180 Member
    What a douche bag seriously. I would have said you ought to take a look in the mirror. I know its rude to hear a complete stranger say that to you but don't take it to heart. Of what importance is his opinion? I'm sorry that he said that to you though.
  • Collidoscopekid
    Collidoscopekid Posts: 195 Member
    Honey you can lose weight, but that man will always have an ugly soul. I was at a party last year, I weighed about 165 pounds at the time. There were a lot of people so it was a tight squeeze to get around. As I passed one of the other party goers he said, "Wide load coming through." At the time it broke my heart. Now I just realize some people are just ugly on the inside and need to work on themselves emotionally the way I am physically.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member
    Whoa! I hope you work in a psych ward. Who would say such a thing? Oh, yeah. Lots of people. People have no social filters anymore.
  • Lauren8239
    Lauren8239 Posts: 1,039 Member
    I think I would have raised my eyebrows.....laughed...then snickered while pointing at his belly.
    He's not even worth a thought to you. :flowerforyou:
  • leannems
    leannems Posts: 516 Member
    He feels bad about himself and putting you down made him feel better. It's sort of a sick power balance. By making someone else feel bad, someone else feels good - but it's only temporary and they have to turn around and do it again. People with their own self confidence don't have to use others to make themselves better because it comes internally.

    For what it's worth, I had one of those strawberries a few weeks ago and it was totally worth the 140 calories - great way to indulge in chocolate without going insane, cause those strawberries are huge!
  • xraylady33
    xraylady33 Posts: 222 Member
    You did the right thing by ignoring him, but what an a*s. Obviously unhappy with himself. SERIOUSLY, do not continue thinking about that comment, because you are FABULOUS...and no one can take that away...

    I will share this, once standing in a room of peers, another technologist said to me, don't you get tired of being the big girl in the room? She was larger than myself, and I asked to speak to her in private....enough said. You will not disrespect me in any setting!

    Look forward....
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
    You know there is nothing wrong with a straightforward polite reply. Such as sir that is wildy inappropriate to say to someone you don't know. Embarrass him and make him feel like a small child. Thats not unprofessional and I bet you he feels like an *kitten* and doesn't dare say another word.
  • jennylsapia
    jennylsapia Posts: 236 Member
    WOW Liz that is horrible!!!! You are not even big!!! I hate people like that!!! UGH...gets me on my high horse everytime!! Why would he think that it was ok to tell you that?? It is none of his buisness! My favorite comeback as a kid was, "yea I am fat but you are ugly/stupid and guess what I'm losing weight"!!!!! Such an *kitten*!!! He is lucky I can't kick his *kitten* right now....give me nine months then I will!!!! LOL
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    He was just jealous because he couldn't have a chocolate covered strawberry. Don't let anyone steal your joy!
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    I keep hearing these stories and they make me so angry I don't have words.

    You should have stabbed him in the neck.
  • momof8munchkins
    momof8munchkins Posts: 1,167 Member
    I would have said "pot meet kettle" with a big smile and enjoyed my delicious strawberry
  • cbh142
    cbh142 Posts: 270 Member
    WhatEVER! You should have asked him when he was due!
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
    Where do you live? Thats a shicking thing for someone to say. Pay no attention to him
  • DannyMussels
    DannyMussels Posts: 1,842 Member
    Compared to most women I know, you seem to be in fantastic shape.

    Regardless, SOME guys like skinny girls. Some don't.

    Same with everything else in life.
  • Tuffjourney
    Tuffjourney Posts: 971
    Ok mini vent too..This morning one of the girls in the office recieved a box of chocolate dipped strawberries from edible arrangements and decided to offer me one. Needless to say neither of us are skinny. There was a customer in the lobby at this time, Male with the stomache of a pregnant woman. So I selected one. The guy then says" you know if you eat that you will only get fatter than what you are" "You know men like skinny woman." I didnt reply because I like my job and the words coming out of my mouth wasnt going to be pretty. So I ate all my 140 calories strawberry and gave him eyes that could kill. He doesnt know me or my workout plans. What gives him the right to judge me on my weight? This is why alot of people have confidence issues dealing with there weight

    What a D I C K....
  • LifeOnMars_
    LifeOnMars_ Posts: 720 Member
    Ok mini vent too..This morning one of the girls in the office recieved a box of chocolate dipped strawberries from edible arrangements and decided to offer me one. Needless to say neither of us are skinny. There was a customer in the lobby at this time, Male with the stomache of a pregnant woman. So I selected one. The guy then says" you know if you eat that you will only get fatter than what you are" "You know men like skinny woman." I didnt reply because I like my job and the words coming out of my mouth wasnt going to be pretty. So I ate all my 140 calories strawberry and gave him eyes that could kill. He doesnt know me or my workout plans. What gives him the right to judge me on my weight? This is why alot of people have confidence issues dealing with there weight

    What a doucher. I wouldn't care if I was at work I would've said take a look in the mirror or something like that. What an idiot!

    And I took a look at your profile pictures and you look fine to me.
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    im being honest here, your not even big. not big enough to even think about a comment like that. im 50 lbs overweight and if someone said that to me i would prolly deck them. either that or ask if hes had any sucess at all with ladys. juding by the way he talked to you im assuming he will die alone :]
  • Those kinds of comments aren't so much rude and nasty as they can be soul crushing. That would really hurt my feelings if someone said that to me.
    I'm sorry you had to hear that, and no one should be told that.
  • Marlys101
    Marlys101 Posts: 100
    I had a boss who had no problem addressing me in front of an entire group over lunch hour break asking with his hands on his hips...Do you really need those french fries with that sandwich? He was not perfect himself.
  • JeepBrah
    JeepBrah Posts: 150
    why you care what a random fat dude says to you ?
  • BuckeyeBoi
    BuckeyeBoi Posts: 233 Member
    That person that said that is a *kitten* and an Assssssssshole
  • gentlebreeze2
    gentlebreeze2 Posts: 450 Member
    Honey you can lose weight, but that man will always have an ugly soul. I was at a party last year, I weighed about 165 pounds at the time. There were a lot of people so it was a tight squeeze to get around. As I passed one of the other party goers he said, "Wide load coming through." At the time it broke my heart. Now I just realize some people are just ugly on the inside and need to work on themselves emotionally the way I am physically.

    People are mostly like that when they are unhappy with themselves, and they think it elevates them to put someone else down. I used to be bothered by people like that, but now I consider the source and know that I am in a much better place then they are.
  • madamepsychosis
    madamepsychosis Posts: 472 Member
    If it wouldn't have got me fired, I would have just looked him dead in the eye and said 'I don't care. I can lose weight, but you'll always be a *kitten*.'

    I've noticed when people say horrible things like he did, they're usually just trying to justify their own shortcomings. You said he was overweight himself. He was probably aware of that, maybe feeling insecure about it and decided to take it out on the nearest person, which unfortunately was you. Still doesn't stop it being rude as hell though.
  • jenmcdav
    jenmcdav Posts: 67
    ridiculous! and, i looked at your pictures and you are thin! he's got no right to say that to anyone, ever, but it's SO off-base about you.
  • Jmstill300
    Jmstill300 Posts: 239 Member
    A male with the stomach of a pregnant woman? Like this Douche Magoosh has room to talk! I would've slugged him.
  • jelias1
    jelias1 Posts: 97
    He was just jealous because he couldn't have a chocolate covered strawberry. Don't let anyone steal your joy!

    I love this comment and agree completely lol.
  • Fit4Evolution
    Fit4Evolution Posts: 375 Member
    well he is a douche for saying that for one , and guys like a sexy lady , it doesnt matter how much she weighs.. weight is not a turnoff .. I am sure there are many men here that appreciate a woman at any weight and love them all the same no matter what.
  • Rachel5K
    Rachel5K Posts: 48 Member
    Ha! Sounds like the epitome of health and physique himself right there. Guys like skinny girls?? Funny that he thinks he can talk for the whole male population right there. I know plenty of guys who balk when their ladies are too bony, thank you. Hmm... obviously someone liked your coworker enough to drop at the very LEAST $45 on some chocolate covered strawberries for her to enjoy and share so HE obviously didn't think she needed to lose weight.

    Mainly, just ignore the idiots. Their comments can be hurtful but it is up to you to either take them to heart or let them go. You are a beautiful woman... and he still has a pregnant belly with no fetus to show for it. ;)