Good advice your momma taught you..

Gwenski

Got to thinking about some of the little sayings my mom used to give us and thought I'd share.. pipe in with your own

When heading out the door to school: "Remember your A,B,Cs.. Always Be Careful!"
When wondering if something was still edible in the fridge" "If in doubt, THROW IT OUT!!!"
When being too critical of others: "If you can't say something nice, don't say ANYTHING at all"
When she knew we were troubled by something but didn't want to say: "We can't play with the hand you've been dealt until you've laid all your cards on the table"

What are yours?

budhandy

never put your penis in a over sized pencil sharpener

darkknightfan

if you leave your eyes like that too long theyll stay that way .

Dont sit too close to the TV.

Always have clean underwear on ... youll be sooo embarrassed if you get in an accident and have dirty underwear on

PapaverSomniferum

"Ain't nothin' in this world that don't wash off"

thanks mom

PepeGreggerton

wrap it before you pack it

JennieAL

Nothing is forever.
It's always hardest right before you make the decision, after is always easier.
Don't marry a man you feel sorry for.
All men are dogs. <--- I always argued with her about this one, but I understand what she meant... she wasn't always eloquent, lol.

NSQuintana

n/a

BAMFMeredith

My mom always taught me ridiculous stuff. Not normal things moms teach you like what the OP posted. Her classic gems include:

"Boys are stupid, honey. And when they grow into men, they're still stupid, but you learn to adapt."
"Don't leave the house without mascara and lip gloss, at least. You never know who you'll run into."
"If you think it makes you look fat, it probably does, so don't wear it."

or, one of my personal favorites:
"If your friends won't tell you when you look bad or that you suck at something, you need new friends."

My mom's kinda my best friend wasn't always that way, but now that I'm an adult, she definitely is.

Six6xiS

Lock your door while you do that!

tmacmoto

"Shoot first, then ask em questions"
"Leave a straight flush in one hand and have the other hand ready to slap their faces"
"Chopsticks are only for food, spoons are for everything else"
"Paw don't need no anchovy when he's got whale at home"
"Don't Ski and do your taxes at the same time. None here cares for irony"
"Boy, don't care if you got blackbelt in Karate. I got School Ruler in from Catholic Nuns"

galegetsthin

"Say it with flowers, say it with mink, but never, ever, say it in ink"
"If it wont matter in 10 years, It doesn't matter now"
"If you and your husband start arguing, start stripping. Nobody can be angry long when they are naked"

abberbabber

"Do what makes you happy." ~ She's always had my back, even when I've done stupid things. I can't say how much it means to have one person in your life who wants nothing from you other than your own happiness

regina2063

not to ever make fun at people
not to stare at people
not to TALK to STRANGER....i think i failed that test....ha ha

usc2626

Go play in the traffic!!

veggievixen79

Never settle for second best in anything....and ALWAYS have a plan B

(my mom can be harsh but her advice has served me very well!)

Gr8ChangesAhead

Nothing of importance i learned to not be like her: Married 6 times, drank too much, horrible mouth she never kept shut, and that my friends is just the tip of the iceburg !!!

royalty_mind_1me

Oh buddy I can go on and on that woman is awesome in my eyes...

She taught me to finish what I started (perfect for this site) lol===>gotta follow through! and #2 never keep a closed mouth, over the years I learned there are times you just need to LISTEN lol

stevewynjones

" if you can hear a pin drop..RUN.. someones holding a grenade..."

MelMoly

Dont grow your drugs in the basement its grounds for child endangerment and will have your kids taken away...

doorki

"You'll be better before you get married."

sassylilmama

Never throw the first punch but if someone else starts it I sure as hell better finish it!

IndyInk

My mother always said, "Never take a laxative and a sleeping pill at the same time," and "If you wake up and your self esteem is low, wear really sexy underwear."

Excellent words of wisdom, I must say.

My Cherokee grandma always said, "If one of your body parts itches, it's time to wash it."

THINandFABULOUS

All I really need to know in life, I learned in Kindergarten.

All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sand pile at school.

These are the things I learned:
Share everything.
Play fair.
Don't hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don't take things that aren't yours.
Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.
Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.
And then remember the ****-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.
Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.

Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life, your work, government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all - the whole world - had cookies and milk at about 3 o'clock in the afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had as a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.

And it is still true, no matter how old you are, when you go out in the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.

usc2626

Go find me a good switch!

tig_ol_bitties

Everything is a little better with wine.

WhittRak

"When someone shows you who they really are, you better believe em"

taunto

"Duo rupai ki daal gai, kuttay ki zaat pehchani gai"
Translation

"2 bucks worth of food wasted, the bums nature was learned"

Meaning that even if a little of money or time is wasted on somebody, its good if you learn about the persons nature

La_Amazona

Marry a white boy!

Good thing she gave me that permission because that's all I seem to like.. lol

jenniebean1680

I don't have any catchphrases or any hard-and-fast advice, but...

Mom taught me to find beauty and joy in the little things. Birdsong, spring flowers, summer thunder, singing, fresh air, laughter.

Without fail, I am happier when I take the time to notice and revel in these things. When I let them get lost in the jumble of hectic everyday life, I am less Me. I am my richest self when I smile back at a flower I planted when it blooms, when I get lost in the fresh air on a long run, when I see the beauty in nature.

Miss you, Ma. xoxo

digitalbill

My Mother told me to "never kiss and tell". Let the girls spread the rumors.
I listened to her advice.
When a guy kisses and tells, it is bragging and ruins the girls reputation.
When a girl kisses and tells, it elevates the guys reputation to the other girls.

Also, my older Brother and I had this conversation during my freshman year of high school.

Me: I have to choose an elective
Him: Take Home ec and cooking
Me: Why? Its gonna be nothing but a bunch of chicks.
Him: Exactly.
Me.. (after a minute) .Ohhhhhhh.

Il_DaniD_lI

"Marry someone rich" ..If only I had listened.