Is she right or wrong?

1Corinthians13

I didn't mean to offend, I was just frustrated because it seemed, and perhaps I'm taking it wrong, and if so, I'm sorry, but it seemed as though you were saying that anyone who eats processed foods or allows their children to have a soda once in awhile is raising their children wrong. No, you didn't say those words, but that is how it came across, at least to me.

Again, I'm sorry to offend you.

JoyousMaximus

I have two opinions.
1) I think she is right to try to teach her kids to eat healthy. I think she maybe a little extreme but they're her kids and she is trying, which is really the most a parent can do.
2) I think she is wrong to try to make everyone else conform to her opinions. From the sound of the article, the school has okay lunches which is more than most schools can say. So why should she try to make every other child give up their "treats." (Although, as a side note, I don't think food should be used as reward but again that is my opinion because that is something I struggle with)

I also think the school should not have handled it the way they did. It seems so wrong to me what the teacher said and then the administraters calling the kid out of the class to talk about it? She was doing what her mother told her to do. More than anything I feel so sorry for the kids because they're supposed to do what their parents tell them and their teacher's tell them so they're kind of stuck.

LuckyLeprechaun

My point is that while junk food existed when we were kids, it exists in a different form. For example, pop had sugar in it instead of HFCS...there are "new" checmicals and additives in food today that didn't exist, weren't approved and weren't used when we were growing up.

As far as my neighborhood, lol, nice try at a dig, there actually are ZERO sex offenders in our entire sub division, and while I do take my children outside, for many kids that is not an option. I grew up in Neveah Buchanan's hometown, I live thirty miles from there. Long before her tragic death, I would have never let my kids play alone there, even in my backyard. Parents have to get off their own lazy behinds and play with their kids. Throwing them in the back yard to get them out of your hair isn't good parenting, even in your neighbohood! There is a lot to be gained by actually playing with them and if you honestly think American parents do enough of that, we must live on different planets, not just different neighnorhoods.


MFP will have a very long life as obesity will always exist, because adults who were made to feel less than special when no one brought cupcakes to school on their birthday attempt to satisfy their own emotions by feeding their kids garbage. It will always exist because if you aren't "middle of the road" if you aren't open to agreeing to things you believe are wrong for the sake of not offending ONE person, you are "extreme" and extreme is bad in America, even if you try to be extremely healthy. We must all be equally flawed, equally weak, and make equally poor choices...for if not, someone will be offended...

No no no no no no...
1. I don't have children, but children of my friends and my nieces and nephews get clean whole balanced meals and snacks when they stay at my house. We make waffles from scratch, try new fruits and vegetables, and drink water. I don't even have pop, kool-aid, chips (except organic blue corn tortilla chips), a single cookie or little debbie snack in my house. They don't even exist in my world. I don't stuff children full of enriched flour and partially hydrogenated oils to make up for the trauma of no cupcakes brought to school on my birthday... I agree with the premise... just not the extent to which it's being carried out.
2. Do you *seriously* not allow any of your children to ever go to a fast food restaurant, eat cake or ice cream, have a lollipop, eat at friends houses, go to birthday parties, or drink a coke? Be honest. Seriously?
3. I'm not saying you have to fit in with anyone's flaws, weaknesses, or poor choices. I'm just saying you don't have the right to enforce THEIR compliance to your *opinion* of what the best food choices are. Every child should be allowed to refuse the cupcake, but one child should not be allowed to take everyone's cupcakes away. As I said before, because I have morals and values, I get to be a freak sometimes. So what? Maybe I can enlighten someone else or maybe they can enlighten me, but I will make the choices for myself that I feel are best. That's called freedom. If I want to make poor choices, as long as I'm not forcing those choices on another person or infringing upon their rights, I may. America is awesome like that. I'm all for teaching people, but not forcing people when it comes to food choices.
4. This is food. It's not black and white, good and evil. Popcorn has it's good points and it's bad points. Chocolate has antioxidants but also has fat and sugar. There is no perfect food that is all we need to ingest. We need variety.

I'm answering #2. My kids do, on occasion, eat fast food, eat cake, eat ice cream, eat at other people's houses and go to parties. One thing they don't EVER drink is soda...period...We don't keep it in the house, we don't drink it when we go out, we just never drink it. I never had it in my house when I was growing up, and when our kids were really young, my husband and I decided not to have it in our house. I do all the grocery shopping, so I make the decisions as to when will be stocked in the kitchen!

Mary

this is an interesting thing to examine: my parents also never had soda available in the hosue. I never ate or had any access to things like little debbie snacks, kool aid, soda, candy was a rarity, we were served a meat, vegetable and a starch every night for dinner (or 90-95% of the time) and we had our choice of drinking water or milk.
it wasn't like "YOU CAN'T HAVE THOSE EVIL THINGS", it was just that we don't buy that stuff.
So I never had the sensation that we were being controlled, but I did have the sensation that we were being deprived. My mom packed my lunches, and I always got a sandwich (mustard and lunch meat), a piece of fruit (which I often threw away) and a drink (usually a 100% juicy juice box). I was constantly jealous of the lunches that my friends had that were full of crap. I longed for chips, sodas, cookies. gummy treats with gushing centers...you name it, I was jealous that I didn't have it.
and my siblings and I were healthy, active kids, with a balance between video games and playing outside, none of the three of us was ever overweight at all. we participated in activities, we were outside playing more often than not.
My parents taught and lived good examples for us.
But....when I became an adult, I did everything that I had always wished for. I ate fast food practically every day. I drank koolaid. With extra sugar. I drank all the soda I could hold. I ate fried, sugary, fatty, crappy food till I looked around and went HOLY *kitten*, I'm obese!

But my brother and sister didn't do that to themselves?

So- why?

I offer this story in response to all the posts that claim this lady, by being so harsh in her reactions, is "damaging" her kids' relationship with food.

because despite all the "right" things my parents did regarding food, one out of the three of us got obese anyway.

amymeenieminymo

My point is that while junk food existed when we were kids, it exists in a different form. For example, pop had sugar in it instead of HFCS...there are "new" checmicals and additives in food today that didn't exist, weren't approved and weren't used when we were growing up.

As far as my neighborhood, lol, nice try at a dig, there actually are ZERO sex offenders in our entire sub division, and while I do take my children outside, for many kids that is not an option. I grew up in Neveah Buchanan's hometown, I live thirty miles from there. Long before her tragic death, I would have never let my kids play alone there, even in my backyard. Parents have to get off their own lazy behinds and play with their kids. Throwing them in the back yard to get them out of your hair isn't good parenting, even in your neighbohood! There is a lot to be gained by actually playing with them and if you honestly think American parents do enough of that, we must live on different planets, not just different neighnorhoods.


MFP will have a very long life as obesity will always exist, because adults who were made to feel less than special when no one brought cupcakes to school on their birthday attempt to satisfy their own emotions by feeding their kids garbage. It will always exist because if you aren't "middle of the road" if you aren't open to agreeing to things you believe are wrong for the sake of not offending ONE person, you are "extreme" and extreme is bad in America, even if you try to be extremely healthy. We must all be equally flawed, equally weak, and make equally poor choices...for if not, someone will be offended...

I'm not sure I get your point about the junk food of yesterday and today. It really doesn't matter what was in it then or now, avoiding junk food is avoiding junk food.

I really wasn't trying to take a dig at you or your neighborhood, I'm sorry if you took it that way. I was just saying I don't know where you live so I wasn't trying to assume what your neighborhood is like. Obviously for someone that lives in the slums of detroit, sending their children out to play isn't really realistic. I actually live about 30 miles of north of Monroe, so more than likely we live in the same type of neighborhood, and yeah there are a ton of dangers in the world, I also think we need to protect our children by arming them with choices and intelligence rather than having to constantly watch them.

In fact, when I was a kid I would have HATED if my parents watched me like a hawk everytime I was playing. I had a very wild imagination and I loved playing in the backyard by myself. My mom was always right in the house, and my dad was often around doing yardwork, but nobody was watching me every second and I was fine. The same goes for when I was out with friends....I was never once approached by a stranger who meant to harm me, and despite what the news makes you think, I don't think most kids ever are.

But this is about food, so I will try to steer myself back there. I think most people's main point is that children become obese when they eat NOTHING but junk food and get no exercise. A cupcake here and there is not going to make them obese. Kids should be taught that they can refuse junk food at school if they don't want it, removing the cupcake altogether isn't going to solve anything. What are they going to do when they get older and are in situations where they have to make a choice?

aymie24

I didn't mean to offend, I was just frustrated because it seemed, and perhaps I'm taking it wrong, and if so, I'm sorry, but it seemed as though you were saying that anyone who eats processed foods or allows their children to have a soda once in awhile is raising their children wrong. No, you didn't say those words, but that is how it came across, at least to me.

Again, I'm sorry to offend you.

Thank you for your apology. You know, this is EXACTLY why our kids are, and will continue to be obese. This was the point I tried to make earlier.

I said they shouldn't have crap at school, and as little as possible in general. I never, ever even mentioned clean eating, not once.

You, and many others, took that as "you feed your kids crap once in a while, you are a bad parent".

Suddenly, feeding kids crap is the right thing to do because no one wants to feel like a bad parent! Everyone feels defensive of their own lifestyle, and in your case, your childhood, and now things that were never said, or even thought, are being argued!

Suddenly, if you don't feed your kids crap, at least sometimes, they will have eating disorders, they will be freaks, you will ruin their lives!!!!

Then, eveyone who feels guilty for not doing the right thing 100% of the time can breathe a big, collective sigh of relief and I am worse than Dave ever was!

Not one person on this earth is perfect. Not one person makes the best choices 100% of the time.

I stand by kids not needing to eat junk food at school. I stand by challenging parents to come up with healthier (NOT clean, NOT organic) treats for special occassions at school. It can be done, often more cheaply than cupcakes.

I also stand by the fact that I don't always do what I think is the best thing, for many reasons, time, money, effort. I can still think that those things I am not doing are better than what I am doing. That's a very free place to be with myself and I hope everyone who took offense to the things I never said, but they felt the need to defend against, can get to that place for themselves. I don't have to defend my lack of money, time or effort, I just have to try harder next time, and I am happy with that. Everyone should try that, it rocks!

aymie24

My point is that while junk food existed when we were kids, it exists in a different form. For example, pop had sugar in it instead of HFCS...there are "new" checmicals and additives in food today that didn't exist, weren't approved and weren't used when we were growing up.

As far as my neighborhood, lol, nice try at a dig, there actually are ZERO sex offenders in our entire sub division, and while I do take my children outside, for many kids that is not an option. I grew up in Neveah Buchanan's hometown, I live thirty miles from there. Long before her tragic death, I would have never let my kids play alone there, even in my backyard. Parents have to get off their own lazy behinds and play with their kids. Throwing them in the back yard to get them out of your hair isn't good parenting, even in your neighbohood! There is a lot to be gained by actually playing with them and if you honestly think American parents do enough of that, we must live on different planets, not just different neighnorhoods.


MFP will have a very long life as obesity will always exist, because adults who were made to feel less than special when no one brought cupcakes to school on their birthday attempt to satisfy their own emotions by feeding their kids garbage. It will always exist because if you aren't "middle of the road" if you aren't open to agreeing to things you believe are wrong for the sake of not offending ONE person, you are "extreme" and extreme is bad in America, even if you try to be extremely healthy. We must all be equally flawed, equally weak, and make equally poor choices...for if not, someone will be offended...

I'm not sure I get your point about the junk food of yesterday and today. It really doesn't matter what was in it then or now, avoiding junk food is avoiding junk food.

I really wasn't trying to take a dig at you or your neighborhood, I'm sorry if you took it that way. I was just saying I don't know where you live so I wasn't trying to assume what your neighborhood is like. Obviously for someone that lives in the slums of detroit, sending their children out to play isn't really realistic. I actually live about 30 miles of north of Monroe, so more than likely we live in the same type of neighborhood, and yeah there are a ton of dangers in the world, I also think we need to protect our children by arming them with choices and intelligence rather than having to constantly watch them.

In fact, when I was a kid I would have HATED if my parents watched me like a hawk everytime I was playing. I had a very wild imagination and I loved playing in the backyard by myself. My mom was always right in the house, and my dad was often around doing yardwork, but nobody was watching me every second and I was fine. The same goes for when I was out with friends....I was never once approached by a stranger who meant to harm me, and despite what the news makes you think, I don't think most kids ever are.

But this is about food, so I will try to steer myself back there. I think most people's main point is that children become obese when they eat NOTHING but junk food and get no exercise. A cupcake here and there is not going to make them obese. Kids should be taught that they can refuse junk food at school if they don't want it, removing the cupcake altogether isn't going to solve anything. What are they going to do when they get older and are in situations where they have to make a choice?

Ok seriously, this has to be my last post today, lol.

We don't live in the same type of neighborhood, I am west of Monroe now, in the boonies. I know what you are saying about choices and safety but my thought is that for every RSO, how many haven't been caught? I will also totally own up to being overly protective of my kids. The fact that you would have hated your mom watching like a hawk has nothing to do with mine, yours or anyone else's kids. We as parents really need to stop comparing our own feelings, expectation and experiences as kids to other kids. You are your own person, just as each child is their own person.

As far as junk food being different today than it was 20 years ago. Please, check this out for yourself. HFCS is more dangerous than sugar and the preservatives, additives and chemicals used now are very different than those used when we were kids. Junk food today is not the same junk food we ate.

As far as kids who are overweight only eating junk food, sorry, but that is not true. Some of it is portion control, some of it is junk food, some of it is emotional eating and some of it is lack of activity.

A cupcake here and there is fine. My kids get a cupcake, among other things, here and there at their own parties, at their friends parties, on holidays, at sports banquets and other special events. That IS a cupcake here and there. Why do we need to throw in 2 to 4 more per month at school? In addition to the cookies and other treats served in most school cafeterias?

keiko

I think most people's main point is that children become obese when they eat NOTHING but junk food and get no exercise. A cupcake here and there is not going to make them obese. Kids should be taught that they can refuse junk food at school if they don't want it, removing the cupcake altogether isn't going to solve anything. What are they going to do when they get older and are in situations where they have to make a choice?

I am going to agree with this. I said it before and I will say it again. They can be taught to say "no thank you." Because like you said, eventually they will be in situations where they are going to have to make that choice for themselves.

keiko

A cupcake here and there is fine. My kids get a cupcake, among other things, here and there at their own parties, at their friends parties, on holidays, at sports banquets and other special events. That IS a cupcake here and there. Why do we need to throw in 2 to 4 more per month at school? In addition to the cookies and other treats served in most school cafeterias?

For me it's two fold. One I don't want the government controlling more of what I can and cannot choose to do. Two, it still comes down to choice. I don't know of anywhere that a child has been forced to eat a cupcake or cookies. They are free to say "no thank you"

aymie24

A cupcake here and there is fine. My kids get a cupcake, among other things, here and there at their own parties, at their friends parties, on holidays, at sports banquets and other special events. That IS a cupcake here and there. Why do we need to throw in 2 to 4 more per month at school? In addition to the cookies and other treats served in most school cafeterias?

For me it's two fold. One I don't want the government controlling more of what I can and cannot choose to do. Two, it still comes down to choice. I don't know of anywhere that a child has been forced to eat a cupcake or cookies. They are free to say "no thank you"

You're absolutely right. And of course they are kids, who really don't need boundries or parents or other adults to guide them in making good choices. Heck, why are they in school anyway? They can make intelligent choices for themselves as long as parents tell them what is good and bad. They should be able to figure out that reading and stuff, right? School isn't about social and emotional growth at all, they can say no thank you once you teach them to, temptation is nothing, peer pressure, nothing either.

You tell them foods are bad for them and to say no thank you and they will. Never mind the kids who don't get guidence at home, that's too bad for them, after all they are the obese ones anyway, the ones who eat ONLY junk food. It's my right to send cupcakes so darn it I will!

Wonderful!

PureAndHealthy

What interesting dialogue this has started! :happy: The reason "clean" and "organic" eating came up is because I can sit here and criticize parents who feed their convential eggs, milk, chicken, etc to their children, filling them with hormones and antibiotics and pesticide residue in the few fruits and vegetables they're given which were grown in nutrient-depleted chemical-drenched soil and I can talk about vaccines and antibiotics and all the junk people pump into their kids and put those parents down and go on crusades to rid our schools and restaurants of every conventially grown fruit, vegetable, and animal product, BUT fact is... people get to make their own decisions, and a conventionally grown apple still has its merits. Cupcakes and Fundip and juicepops are not evil. They're on the low end of quality food, but they are still food. A school having a healthy choice for lunch is awesome. Let's applaud that. Don't take away a kid's birthday cupcakes. Unless you're insisting on perfect clean eating, you're being inconsistent.

keiko

A cupcake here and there is fine. My kids get a cupcake, among other things, here and there at their own parties, at their friends parties, on holidays, at sports banquets and other special events. That IS a cupcake here and there. Why do we need to throw in 2 to 4 more per month at school? In addition to the cookies and other treats served in most school cafeterias?

For me it's two fold. One I don't want the government controlling more of what I can and cannot choose to do. Two, it still comes down to choice. I don't know of anywhere that a child has been forced to eat a cupcake or cookies. They are free to say "no thank you"

You're absolutely right. And of course they are kids, who really don't need boundries or parents or other adults to guide them in making good choices. Heck, why are they in school anyway? They can make intelligent choices for themselves as long as parents tell them what is good and bad. They should be able to figure out that reading and stuff, right? School isn't about social and emotional growth at all, they can say no thank you once you teach them to, temptation is nothing, peer pressure, nothing either.

You tell them foods are bad for them and to say no thank you and they will. Never mind the kids who don't get guidence at home, that's too bad for them, after all they are the obese ones anyway, the ones who eat ONLY junk food. It's my right to send cupcakes so darn it I will!

Wonderful!

I agree with you again. Kids do need boundaries and parents and other adults to guide them. Not only in food choices but also in how to say no to the temptations that they will face as teens and as adults.
School is a place of not only learning the three R's but also for the social and emotional growth that happens.

Will they always make the best choice? No. But I believe that each time they can make a choice for themselves is a learning time for them.

And yes, I do like cupcakes. And I don't think they should be banned from schools because some parents don't want their kids eating them. I prefer homemade, no box mixes. But hey, if someone doesn't have time or doesn't like to bake and they send in store bought ones and my kid ate it I'd be ok with that to.
And yes I did raise two kids. Both adults now and both eat healthy most of the time.

chrissyh

But hey, if someone doesn't have time or doesn't like to bake and they send in store bought ones and my kid ate it I'd be ok with that to.

[/quote]

When I think about the kitchens that some of the baked goods may have been made in :noway: - I think at least the store bought has a health department inspecting them :sick:
:laugh:

beckyi88

Her methods are totally wrong! If she has such a problem with school...easy solution...homeschool!
She objects to her children being *polluted* by others *poison*, but why is her voice more important than mine? She wants to impose her beliefs on my children, but wants to strip me of that same right? Hmmm, not quite right!
JMHO!