Women exercising outdoors
Just another friendly reminder to be careful while exercising outdoors.
Two days ago I was sexually assaulted while on my normal, very popular walking route. There just happened to be no one but myself and what looked like a 14-16yo boy for about a 200m stretch of path. Turns out even kids may assault women these days. I am generally very careful, but would never have dreamed that this kid was about to sneak up behind me and very forcefully shove his hand between my legs in broad daylight. This was not a bum-pinch (which would not have been okay either).
A few tips:
1. I always thought talking on the phone would be a deterrent, but no, because you are distracted and less aware of your surroundings, you are at higher risk. (I was on the phone, thinking I was safe in the middle of the day)
2. Turn your music off when it's only you and one male/group of males on the path.
3. Do not be afraid to look at people - there is no need to be paranoid, but looking people in the face will help you to give a description if you need to. It also lets them know that you have enough info to give a description (I failed to look at this kid)
4. If you think you are about to be assaulted/during the assault/following the assault MAKE NOISE. Any sort of noise is good, but I went for strong angry noise. I yelled at him as loudly as I could until he was out of sight. (he was running)
I personally also puff right up in fight-stance to let them know I plan to fight.
If it's a car:
...I used to have to work in the bushland behind the university at dawn and dusk... yeah, i know, it's like a recipe for rape...and a couple of times cars drove past me very slowly while i was walking, sometimes back and forth multiple times, then pulled up in a position that i definitely had to walk past.
In these situations I don't care if it's a sweet old lady who can't find her building, I treat it like a potential threat!
1. Get the number plate. punch it into your phone if you have to.
2. (not a necessary step, but it has helped me) Let them know you have the number plate............ I have done a variation of this three times - I stopped walking and either stared at them until they left, or pointed at my eyes, then pointed at their number plate.... the car went screeching away when i did this! This confirmed that they were watching me... and if it was some sweet old lady who I scared, who cares?
3. Do not go near the car. You might be tempted into talking yourself into believing in that sweet old lady - i know I did - but don't.
Feel free to share your experiences or tips.
Two days ago I was sexually assaulted while on my normal, very popular walking route. There just happened to be no one but myself and what looked like a 14-16yo boy for about a 200m stretch of path. Turns out even kids may assault women these days. I am generally very careful, but would never have dreamed that this kid was about to sneak up behind me and very forcefully shove his hand between my legs in broad daylight. This was not a bum-pinch (which would not have been okay either).
A few tips:
1. I always thought talking on the phone would be a deterrent, but no, because you are distracted and less aware of your surroundings, you are at higher risk. (I was on the phone, thinking I was safe in the middle of the day)
2. Turn your music off when it's only you and one male/group of males on the path.
3. Do not be afraid to look at people - there is no need to be paranoid, but looking people in the face will help you to give a description if you need to. It also lets them know that you have enough info to give a description (I failed to look at this kid)
4. If you think you are about to be assaulted/during the assault/following the assault MAKE NOISE. Any sort of noise is good, but I went for strong angry noise. I yelled at him as loudly as I could until he was out of sight. (he was running)
I personally also puff right up in fight-stance to let them know I plan to fight.
If it's a car:
...I used to have to work in the bushland behind the university at dawn and dusk... yeah, i know, it's like a recipe for rape...and a couple of times cars drove past me very slowly while i was walking, sometimes back and forth multiple times, then pulled up in a position that i definitely had to walk past.
In these situations I don't care if it's a sweet old lady who can't find her building, I treat it like a potential threat!
1. Get the number plate. punch it into your phone if you have to.
2. (not a necessary step, but it has helped me) Let them know you have the number plate............ I have done a variation of this three times - I stopped walking and either stared at them until they left, or pointed at my eyes, then pointed at their number plate.... the car went screeching away when i did this! This confirmed that they were watching me... and if it was some sweet old lady who I scared, who cares?
3. Do not go near the car. You might be tempted into talking yourself into believing in that sweet old lady - i know I did - but don't.
Feel free to share your experiences or tips.
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Replies
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Crazy! Hope your okay! Did you happen to report it, prob not a lot they can do but good to have it on record anyways!0
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I am very sorry this happen to you, it is so sad that you cannot go out and enjoy a walk alone without peoples bothering you. Be careful.0
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Jeez, I'm sorry to hear this! I was also accosted on parkland before, so I know how scary it can be.
The guy did run away when I grabbed my phone and asked for the police! So keep your phone handy!
Good luck :flowerforyou:0 -
I haven't reported it yet, but plan to tomorrow. I can't identify the kid, but if he has done it before or does it again in the area, it may help.
Initially I didn't want to get some poor kid in trouble for doing something really silly, that maybe he will never do again, but then i realised that if he is doing things like this then chances are high that he has been abused or has witnessed abuse, so yes, reporting it.
I am still feeling yuck about it, so wanted to try to create some sort of positive from it.0 -
I hope you're okay!
I'm so afraid to run/walk alone, even when I'm with my dog. You never know what people will do. If I do walk alone, I am sure to stay away from the bike trail, I stay on the roads, and main streets in my town so that if something did happen I could scream and I could be heard.
This is a great thread, everyone needs to be careful.0 -
I think every woman should take a basic self defense class. Many of our local Karate studios offer them, often for free. The basic premise is that your learn what to do to get AWAY! Not to fight! Always have an escape route in mind wherever you are. OP sounds like a smart lady - and that means we are all targets, no matter how prepared we are. We can only do our best to create a positive outcome from any encounter, but we can't let that fear keep us from living!0
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I'm really sorry this happened to you and I'm really glad that you weren't hurt further.
BUT!!!!!
Call the police IMMEDIATELY!
It is irresponsible to wait until tomorrow.
ETA: And I'm actually mad that you chose to post on a forum board to "warn" women before calling the police. If you are concerned about women's safety. Call the police!0 -
I hope you're ok - at least you're talking about it, sharing the experience and making something good come out of it. A lot of sexual abuse goes unreported because people are embarrassed, or they think it's their fault - so make sure you report it. Shame you didn't get a good look at the kid, but why would you have, you don't expect to be accosted like that by a child :S
Thanks for the pointers and reminders, I think it's important that we're vigilant these days
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So sorry to hear this and hope you can move past it quickly.
You mentioned 'puffing up ready to fight'... I've been told before that this is a good technique. Apparently, these freaks are less likely to take on someone who looks like they will fight... It's much easier for them to prey on someone who looks weaker and will be less hassle. And so, when I walk, I try to stay tall, shoulders back and with a powerful, purposeful stride - sort of with a 'don't mess with me' air about myself! ...and also avoid dangerous situations and be aware of your surroundings - obviously!0 -
As long as you are okay that is the first priority. Then please make sure you report this. Nobody deserves this and like was previously said who knows if this is a pattern or will he do it again or worse take it further.0
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This is a scary experience - and well done to you for taking a proactive stance in reaction to it.
It can be tempting, when we do something often enough, to think we're safe when out and about. And of course, most of the time we are. But it's sensible to be vigilant, and to be prepared.
As I said to you previously, I hope this boy's stupidity and aggression doesn't put you off exercising outdoors.0 -
I was followed on two seperate occassions years ago so I do not walk or go exercising on my own. I live on a quiet country road so if I want to walk I drive into town and walk the streets in my small town where there is always people about.0
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I'm sorry that this happened to you. And I agree: the best defense against an attack is prevention. Unfortunately personal safety is just a part of running that one cannot simply ignore.
Here's a good article: http://www.runtheplanet.com/trainingracing/safety/rtpselfd.asp0 -
That's awful!
He definitely should get reprimanded if he is found! 14-16 or not, he doesn't need to learn it's okay to do this and that he can do it on anyone he wants. Hope he gets caught. Sorry for your experience! 0 -
So sorry this happened to you. Thanks for sharing your experience and tips. To all of the women who say they run in town or near people and think that makes them safe, be warned-it's not that big a deterrent. In 1993 I was attack in broad daylight in the middle of downtown, surrounded by plenty of people. Not one lifted a finger. It's certainly better to be near people so you can make noise and have the perpetrator think others will come, but you can't depend on them coming. Take a good self-defense class and learn what you need to know to get away. That's essential.0
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There was an older woman (late 40s) who was raped on a well known exercise trail that is only about 5 miles from my house. She was alone at dusk and wasn't aware of her surroundings. He was caught and arrested. I didn't go to any parks or trails for almost a 6 months after that. Then I just decided that I would take self defense classes and carry a small knife with me if I am alone. If there is nobody at all out, I will just leave, no point of chancing it. It isn't a good idea to put yourself in a dangerous situation....most people don't think a park or exercise path/trail is dangerous. Hopefully women will see this as a learning experience!!!0
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There was an older woman (late 40s) who was raped on a well known exercise trail that is only about 5 miles from my house. She was alone at dusk and wasn't aware of her surroundings. He was caught and arrested. I didn't go to any parks or trails for almost a 6 months after that. Then I just decided that I would take self defense classes and carry a small knife with me if I am alone. If there is nobody at all out, I will just leave, no point of chancing it. It isn't a good idea to put yourself in a dangerous situation....most people don't think a park or exercise path/trail is dangerous. Hopefully women will see this as a learning experience!!!
Not sure where you are from but in the UK carrying a knife for 'protection' is a offence which attracts a jail sentece. Worse than that evidence suggests that women who attempt to use weapons against attackers tend to have it taken off them and used against them.
Whilst we have the right to be safe, carrying weapons is not the answer.0 -
Do you know how to use that knife? If you don't, you are basically just providing a weapon to your attacker.0
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Glad you're ok. But REPORT IT NOW! The police can send someone to the area for extra coverage and warn people at least and maybe prevent this from happening to another person. Don't wait until tomorrow!0
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That is awful - I sometimes I hope I see something like that happen so I can beat the tar out of the guy - But on the other hand I would probably get in more trouble than the sicko. Good idea to put the license plate number in your phone - another Idea is carry a gun.
Bob0 -
I'm so sorry that happened to you. You should have reported it right away though. I don't run on bike trails I just run in my neighborhood. A very safe country neighborhood, but I carry mace with me anyways, Very Visibly Seen on my fuel belt strap. I've even had a guy in my neighborhood say to me, "oh I see you carry mace". Yes, yes I do. You never know what kind of creepers will be out.0
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I agree you should report it right away instead of waiting. This kid may be hanging around that area doing the same thing repeatedly. It's not really the kind of thing someone does just once. But if no one reports it, the police and the public will have no idea.0
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Not sure where you are from but in the UK carrying a knife for 'protection' is a offence which attracts a jail sentece. Worse than that evidence suggests that women who attempt to use weapons against attackers tend to have it taken off them and used against them.
Whilst we have the right to be safe, carrying weapons is not the answer.
The key to not getting a weapon taken away is know how to use it and not being afraid to use it. If you carry a weapon, be sure you are properly trained to use it. My state allows concealed carry handgun permits, so I have one, and am usually armed. My wife is also well trained with her pistol.
JM0 -
My technique is pepper spray, usually I have my two kids so I think that might lure them away. Constant cell phone as well I don't trust anyone and rarely go walking along for long periods of time0
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after he did it you should have chased him down and whooped his *kitten*.
But yes ladies be very careful out there, carrying mace is not a bad option, but try to find a workout buddy, make or female, or your dog.
Try not to go at it alone or find a area where it is populated.0 -
I'm really sorry this happened to you and I'm really glad that you weren't hurt further.
BUT!!!!!
Call the police IMMEDIATELY!
It is irresponsible to wait until tomorrow.
ETA: And I'm actually mad that you chose to post on a forum board to "warn" women before calling the police. If you are concerned about women's safety. Call the police!
I think the point of the post is to remind everyone to be vigilant when they are out exercising as it's something a lot of us don't think about. Sure when we go out at night we are careful but we don't see ourselves as vulnerable in all situations, exercising in daylight would be not a time I would think about. The police will just take a statement, see if anything else similar has been reported (not many women get the courage to report things that are considered embarrassing) if not they will just wait to see if something similar happens. The op mentions that she was too shocked to notice what the kid looked like.0 -
Not sure where you are from but in the UK carrying a knife for 'protection' is a offence which attracts a jail sentece. Worse than that evidence suggests that women who attempt to use weapons against attackers tend to have it taken off them and used against them.
Whilst we have the right to be safe, carrying weapons is not the answer.
The key to not getting a weapon taken away is know how to use it and not being afraid to use it. If you carry a weapon, be sure you are properly trained to use it. My state allows concealed carry handgun permits, so I have one, and am usually armed. My wife is also well trained with her pistol.
JM
Yeah still in the UK carrying a weapon is illegal. Guns are completely illegal, although of course criminals can get there hands on them. Carrying a knife is completely illegal too.0 -
Glad you're okay! Thank you so much for the helpful tips. I hope the little creep gets caught!0
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It's blades over 3 inches that are clearly intended as a weapon that are illegal to carry in the UK, so when I was attending college in a bad area I carried a swiss army knife. College didn't question it as I often needed the tools on it for work (studying electronics). But, be smart. If you don't know how to use something pointy, it's probably best if you don't provide it for someone else. I've practiced with all kinds of weaponry over the years in martial arts and sports clubs, including two sword disciplines.
If you have a dog, try to take them along on your runs if you can't get a buddy to come with you.0 -
I'm really sorry this happened to you and I'm really glad that you weren't hurt further.
BUT!!!!!
Call the police IMMEDIATELY!
It is irresponsible to wait until tomorrow.
ETA: And I'm actually mad that you chose to post on a forum board to "warn" women before calling the police. If you are concerned about women's safety. Call the police!
I think the point of the post is to remind everyone to be vigilant when they are out exercising as it's something a lot of us don't think about. Sure when we go out at night we are careful but we don't see ourselves as vulnerable in all situations, exercising in daylight would be not a time I would think about. The police will just take a statement, see if anything else similar has been reported (not many women get the courage to report things that are considered embarrassing) if not they will just wait to see if something similar happens. The op mentions that she was too shocked to notice what the kid looked like.
Agreed! Definitely serves as a good reminder to be careful! Thanks. Nobody thinks it will happen to them until it does...0
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