Sick of trying with no results

JoniBologna

I will echo a few others and say starving yourself is not the answer. I eat about 1800cals a day, and I am still losing. You need to put some work into repairing your metabolism. Continuing to undereat will only make things worse. Take care of yourself and hang in there.

va_va_voom

I have been at this for years....close to 3 ... after gaining close to 25 pounds after high school. To make my backstory short, I lost 55 pounds in high school though eating only 650 calories a day for a year...averaging 1 pound a week. I kept it off by eating probably 1200-1400 a day, and then got in a new relationship, started eating more, and put some back on...

...I decided 3 years ago that I wanted to get the weight off again, and here it is 3 years later, and I am several pounds heavier than I was (I had started to lose again doing Dukan Diet a year ago, but it has since all come back on, plus more)

I am sick of eating healthy, working out 5x a week (cardio and strength) and seeing NO results....not even looser clothes. I would be fine at this weight if my clothes were at least fitting better. I'm sick of gaining weight or staying the same at 1500 calories a day. I am sick of putting everything I have into this, and 3 years later, I am still at square one, if not 2 steps back.

I try really hard for 2-3 months, and see NOTHING in results, and then give up for a week or two and give myself just a LITTLE wiggle room, then get back to it thinking that the next time will be different. It never is. I still never lose anything, and I still never lose inches.

I started a new strength training program, and was showing my husband some of the stuff on the workouts. I thought that as long as I was doing my best, even if my form wasn't perfect, that I would still see some results in the form of muscle toning/growth. When I showed him my pushup, he laughed at me. I am trying my best, and he laughs at my form, which really hurt a lot. I am still in tears writing this because I am just SO SICK of trying and getting NOTHING out of it. I hate that my jeans don't fit anymore, and that I wear baggy, loose sweatpants because I feel so disgusting and want to hide. I hate being the fat one in my group of friends. At 5'4, 145 pounds, and 32% BF, I am considered obese...and it kills me on the inside.

I'm sorry that this vent is so long...its just 3 years of trying, and frustration built up and I just don't know what to do anymore.

Have you discussed any of this with your primary care physician? I looked at your pictures and there is no way you are obese. Even if the pictures were taken prior to the weight you are trying to lose now...you still would not qualify for obese; maybe overweight, but not obese.

Your BMI calculations seem off, as well.

As for your husband - laughing at you is the last thing he needs to be doing right now. Especially if you are struggling.

Extreme calorie cutting and an intensive exercise program make me concerned that you might be struggling with an eating disorder. That's why I asked about the physician.

nataliefallbach

Don't give up!!! I do think you need to see a specialist though. Someone said you ruined your metabolism, and maybe that is the case, maybe its a thyroid issue and its something you needs meds for. Whatever you do though, don't give up just try something different. You are worth it!!!!!

nataliefallbach

By the way, looked at your photos and you look great! I think maybe you are beating yourself up for no reason. Just my thoughts anyways, I know that we never see ourselves as skinny or perfect or like we WANT but, if you look like the photos you posted I would not call you over weight!!!!!!

secretgirl4611

YOUR 5'4 and 145!! THATS NOT THAT BAD AT ALL
and well, Im right there with u too same issue.. but u know no matter what if u want it badly enough ur just gonna have to keep tryin no matter what.. thats what I do even with the stupid gain back the 4 pounds I lose.. it seems like It takes a month to lose it and just a few days to gain it all back but no matter what just keep goin

Also, just learned bout water weight so yea u never know some of ur weight could just be that which keeps tricking the stupid scale or measure tape..

I started Jan 15th 2012 at 140 and Im 5'2
I have a belly that jiggles like bad and I can grab about 3 inches of it
you know I was sure that by the time I hit 4 months of working out I would have lost the 20 pounds which is all I have to lose on my body to get to 120 a healthy weight for me.. and NOPE def. has NOT been the case at all..
Today is month 4 and so far all I have lost is 4 pounds and just as it appears I have gained that 4 pounds I lost on the scale back in damn water weight! but no matter what just gotta keep on goin..
Yea it gets tough, and DIETS SUCK! but theres no other way at all..
and I too, workout 6days a wk 2x a day.. I just started Insanity 2 wks ago.. and well results or not u know just gonna keep pushin on.. Once you realize at our age (im 26) that its not how it was for us back in high school to be skinny easily.. um yea its HARD to lose weight when were older and being a girl sucks cuz guys always seeeeeem to lose it wayyy faster..
O and I heard the less weight u have to lose like 10-20 pounds takes the LONGEST to come off
BUT U CAN DO IT!! AND SO CAN I! SO LETS GET IT DONE!

OhDD65

I can totally understand your frustration. You definitely have been very dedicated to trying to accomplish your goal. I am 5 ft 1
and I seemed to be stuck at the same place, which became very frustrating after just 6 months. First may I suggest you go to
your dr to be sure you don't have any thyroid problems. After telling him your history he will likely have some advice for you.
This is what I did. I went to the dr.....yes I had thyroid problems, so I was put on a med for that. Next I cut back on my exercise
to 4 days/wk rather than 6 for 45 min a day. I also shook my diet up a bit changing what I was eating, still healthy, rather than
eating the same meals. I also started eating Kashi Go Lean Crunch cereal concentrating on eating more protein than I was.
I can now say I am thrilled to finally be on the downward trend. Slow but sure is what is working for me. Also I am definitely
increasing my water intake, which has been an issue also. Give these ideas a try and I wish you luck on your progress. You
can do this !

AKosky585

To answer some of your questions, I'm doing cardio 3x per week and strength/weights 3x/week ( P90X, Jillian Michales, BodyRock.tv, etc....i switch it up)

AKosky585

Have you discussed any of this with your primary care physician? I looked at your pictures and there is no way you are obese. Even if the pictures were taken prior to the weight you are trying to lose now...you still would not qualify for obese; maybe overweight, but not obese.

Your BMI calculations seem off, as well.

As for your husband - laughing at you is the last thing he needs to be doing right now. Especially if you are struggling.

Extreme calorie cutting and an intensive exercise program make me concerned that you might be struggling with an eating disorder. That's why I asked about the physician.

I have not discussed it with my physician because she blew me off when I expressed my concerns to her. i am trying to find a new doctor who will test me. As for an eating disorder....I NET 1400 calories a day most days and have cut back on exercise lately. I haven't been able to do 650 a day since I was in high school, and I wouldn't want to again either. .. it would make me crazy! lol

samantha1953

Realistic body image???? You are NOT obese by any chart. 32% Body Fat is in the normal range for women your age. As to your friends...they must be stick figures if you are obese by comparison.

Husband laughing at your push up form. Was it a mean laugh or a good natured laugh. My husband and I laugh at each other all the time and we're nuts about each other.

PLUMSGRL

Read this blog, it was an eye opener for me:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/lillebanon/view/my-take-on-eating-more-to-weigh-less-254554

zsaoosh

Oh honey! You are only obese due to BMI, not weight. I am 5'6.5'' and at 152 I was 33% but I never called myself fat. You are NOT fat! Your man is wrong for laughing at you. I think you hurt your metabolism because you keep playing with how much you eat. You need to find a woman at your gym that is fit to help you out. You cant gain muscle on such low cals and that was my prob as well. You need to eat steady, DONT DIET...just eat healthy. Diets dont work nore do they last a lifetime. Friend me and maybe we can help eachother out!!! :bigsmile:

taso42

You've fallen into the vicious cycle of undereating. You need to gradually bring your intake up to a normal healthy amount. Visit a dietitian or psychological counselor if you have to. This should be top priority in your life.

Yori1

Bump

BlueInkDot

1. Your husband is being a jerk. I would make him sleep on the couch for that kind of treatment. I might even slap him in the face. Not cool. Not acceptable. He should never treat you like that. :mad:

2. You're not fat. Not even a little. I just looked at your pictures and you're spot-on. I don't see why you think you're fat at all.

3. Strength training is where it's at. Lift heavy. It's super fun.

4. Eat more. You'll have to work up to it slowly, but you'll be glad you did. Eat lots of protein. Build muscle. It'll be awesome. #hardcore

5. Track all of your food. Your diary is half empty. Better tracking = knowlege. With knowledge you can see correlations, by seeing correlations, you can control your results. It's like being a detective. A detective of bodily SCIENCE. #science

raayfrancy

You seem to have gotten a lot of responses - and I havent read any of them - so maybe someone suggested this...
But just in case they didn't:

Have you ever had your thyroid tested? Or your food allergies?
Maybe you ought to, just in case!

P.S. I don't know how old your pictures are - whether they're from before you said you gained weight, or if they're current.. but you're a beautiful girl. Don't stress the weight - stress the health.

Best wishes, love!
xo

Livin_Large

Have you discussed any of this with your primary care physician? I looked at your pictures and there is no way you are obese. Even if the pictures were taken prior to the weight you are trying to lose now...you still would not qualify for obese; maybe overweight, but not obese.

Your BMI calculations seem off, as well.

As for your husband - laughing at you is the last thing he needs to be doing right now. Especially if you are struggling.

Extreme calorie cutting and an intensive exercise program make me concerned that you might be struggling with an eating disorder. That's why I asked about the physician.

I have not discussed it with my physician because she blew me off when I expressed my concerns to her. i am trying to find a new doctor who will test me. As for an eating disorder....I NET 1400 calories a day most days and have cut back on exercise lately. I haven't been able to do 650 a day since I was in high school, and I wouldn't want to again either. .. it would make me crazy! lol

If you're not logging all your food, where are you getting that you are netting 1400 a day?

Rosa1213

Maybe you could visit a doctor or dietician?
They should have some better answers. As someone else mentioned, your body was in a very bad place when you were only eating 650 calories per day, and maybe it isn't back at its best.

Best wishes to you.

va_va_voom

Have you discussed any of this with your primary care physician? I looked at your pictures and there is no way you are obese. Even if the pictures were taken prior to the weight you are trying to lose now...you still would not qualify for obese; maybe overweight, but not obese.

Your BMI calculations seem off, as well.

As for your husband - laughing at you is the last thing he needs to be doing right now. Especially if you are struggling.

Extreme calorie cutting and an intensive exercise program make me concerned that you might be struggling with an eating disorder. That's why I asked about the physician.

I have not discussed it with my physician because she blew me off when I expressed my concerns to her. i am trying to find a new doctor who will test me. As for an eating disorder....I NET 1400 calories a day most days and have cut back on exercise lately. I haven't been able to do 650 a day since I was in high school, and I wouldn't want to again either. .. it would make me crazy! lol

I once took my weight loss concerns to a doctor and he wanted to put me on an anti-depressant. Huh? :noway: lol I am glad you are looking for a new doctor and will pray that you find one that will listen to you and address your concerns in a healthy way.

That said, if you are going to net more calories, you don't want to cut back on your strength training. From what I've been reading a lot of around here, strength training is the way to go to cut down on body fat and increase lean muscle mass. So, if you back off of anything, I would say cut back on the cardio and focus on the strength training.

SeasideOasis

Unless you don't log all the time (or all your food) - You are frequently under 1200 (like 6 out of 7 days). That alone, since you sort of ruined your metabolism eating less than 700 calories a day, is going to be a big problem. I gained 10 pounds last year eating only 1200 NET calories. Bump up your calories some and see how you feel. With those calories, however, try to fill yourself with VEGETABLES and LOW FAT MEATS! Dont add in extra chips, candy, and pastries.

estrange22

((hugs)) First off, ignore the hubs! Mine is about as supportive as yours....easy for them to say with their super metabolisms! Secondly, I would reccomend eating A LOT MORE. eat around 2000 cals of healthy food and work your booty off! Try doing some heavy lifting and some HIIT (high intensity interval training...google it, love it!) HIIT will usually give your metabolism a good kick in the rear. Whatever you do, do something different! It will be okay:-)