Falling for your best friend

TylerJ76
TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
Okay, so I am having an issue. I have been best friends with her for 15 years. After not seeing her for 2 years, I went to NC to see her for 3 days this past weekend.

Idk...something was different. Something was right....

I THINK we both felt it, but I don't really want to bring it up to her and ruin what has been an amazing friendship for 15 years.

One of the hardest things I have ever done was leaving yesterday morning...tough deal.

Okay, end of my whining/ranting/confusion/whatever...
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Replies

  • iam_thatdude
    iam_thatdude Posts: 1,266 Member
    Get the poison out n ull feel better
  • interceptor311
    interceptor311 Posts: 980 Member
    Been there man....tough situation. Hang in there.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.

    That's true..
  • BADGIRLstl
    BADGIRLstl Posts: 473 Member
    This is really sweet. I wouldn't be able to hold it in if I felt this way. From a woman. Let her know.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    You really should be honest with her about your feelings, but you probably should have done it before you left. That's not a convo you should have over the phone.
  • MyTime1985
    MyTime1985 Posts: 456 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.

    What? :huh: Not necessarily. Maybe she felt it but is worried you didn't. Do what you think is right! :love:
  • Sunshine_Girlie
    Sunshine_Girlie Posts: 618 Member
    I fell for my brother's best friend. I have no idea if he knows, but I'm sure he will soon enough. I am scared to death to tell him. My suggestion to you, tell her. She could be just as scared as I am.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    If action did not occur it was not mutual.
  • cgrout78
    cgrout78 Posts: 1,628 Member
    aww...how sweet...

    but yeah, i've been there, and we tried it, and it was a spectacular failure...

    but we stayed friends, and that was good for us.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.

    What? :huh: Not necessarily. Maybe she felt it but is worried you didn't. Do what you think is right! :love:

    Oh stop with all the "logic" and stuff.
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.

    nope. not true. stick it out man and dont force a kiss on someone. talk to her about it first. jumping into something like that is the opposite of what you want to do (in my opinion). my friend feel for me three years ago and waited one year to tell me. we had our first kiss a few weeks after, when it felt right.
  • sjmgde
    sjmgde Posts: 381 Member
    Tell her how you feel. If its a real friendship you can get past the akwardness of it all
  • lizzynewm
    lizzynewm Posts: 199 Member
    If you've been so close for 15 years, admitting feeling something for her wont ruin a bond that has taken that long to form. I think you should mention it, but go with your gut!
  • tatya317
    tatya317 Posts: 74
    ok so after marriage and a divorce on my part ...I end up marrying my BFF . I have known him since I was 16 and he was 19. It is the greatest relationship :) sometimes things will work out... you just have to let it flow and let time takes its course. Maybe you shld slowly tell her how u feel but please make sure on ur end that this is more then a friendship feeling that u are having for her.
  • ChristiH4000
    ChristiH4000 Posts: 531 Member
    As someone you've known for a very long time, please talk to her. Just make sure she knows that it doesn't have to change things. You may feel the sting of embarrassment if she doesn't feel it too, but you can get past that. Just don't kill yourself wondering and then not do anything about it. If she's feeling it too, she is probably thinking the exact same things as you.
  • LindaCWy
    LindaCWy Posts: 463 Member
    One life man...

    I was asked out 3x by the same guy friend, I rejected him the first two times...

    That guy is now my husband

    go for it, or live in regret
  • meldaniel
    meldaniel Posts: 111
    Yeah, that happened to me and we are still best friends...married now for 8 years. :)
  • iwantahealthierme13
    iwantahealthierme13 Posts: 337 Member
    If you felt different, she probably noticed.

    Same situation but genders flipped, I'm a woman trying to get the man. I know he probably knows but I'm playing it safe for now.
  • Rhea30
    Rhea30 Posts: 625 Member
    If you both really felt it and were ready, youd have kissed.

    Maybe in a fantasy world.

    You should try to talk to her and let her know how you feel but also let her know how you feel about your friendship with her as well so you don't lose that. There's no promises that things could end up awkward if it turns out she doesn't feel the same or to be able to keep her as a friend.
  • DavidOfOz
    DavidOfOz Posts: 225
    Let her know....if the friendship is THAT strong, it will survive even if your feeling isnt reciprocated!
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
    Don't be a wimp!!! Man up and tell her, then give her a passionate kiss!!!

    Caution you better be a Damn good kisser!!!!!
  • Myndi73
    Myndi73 Posts: 270
    My best friend of 30+ years and I fell for each other as well. Or at least we thought. We talked about it, decided to give it a shot. We went out on a real date...he kissed me...and we both started laughing. It was weeeiiiiird! Still best friends and we still laugh about it.
  • mrmanmeat
    mrmanmeat Posts: 1,968 Member
    What part of NC?
  • If you've been so close for 15 years, admitting feeling something for her wont ruin a bond that has taken that long to form. I think you should mention it, but go with your gut!
    ^^^good advice. I think this is sweet, could make for a great story one day :)
  • mrmanmeat
    mrmanmeat Posts: 1,968 Member
    Personally, a friend of mine and I did it after 12 years of friendship. It was fun for a week, but looking back it was a bad idea. You just know too much and a friend of 15+ years is more important. If it was going to be, it already would have been.
  • aww...how sweet...

    but yeah, i've been there, and we tried it, and it was a spectacular failure...

    but we stayed friends, and that was good for us.

    Same thing happened to me.
  • CampinGal34
    CampinGal34 Posts: 84 Member
    I married my best friend after 8 years of friendship....10 yrs of awesome marriage later... :)
    Everyone is different, but I think the kissing thing is dumb.... I felt it for him, he felt it for me and neither of us "acted" on it --who wants to ruin a great friendship. It was him telling me that did the trick for us. Just sayin'
  • Just tell her.
  • paulalynell
    paulalynell Posts: 32
    You should just tell her. My best friend and I ended up married after high school and with 2 kids. We are not together anymore but still are best friends.
    If you honestly are best friends and you tell her and she doesn't feel the same, yall will eventually move on past the awkward. At least that is my opinion(: